Overcoming Fear (Growing Pains #2)

by K. F. Breene

  “Pity,” Sean said, running his eyes over her bare breasts and remembering how they tasted. “Well, after my play...would you mind if I met up with you and my sister?”

  Sean hated that he sounded like an insecure douche, but he didn’t want to smother her. He didn’t know how to do this relationship thing. It was a tricky business.

  “Don’t make things weird, McAdams,” Krista said flippantly, leaning against the wall to put on the sweats. “You want to meet up after, say so. If I don’t want you to, I’ll tell you to f-off.”

  Sean laughed and nodded, “Got it. I’ll call you after the play is done.”

  “Better text. I’m sure it will be loud wherever we are. When should I pay attention to the phone?”

  “Ten-ish I should think.”

  “Right. Next question: Do I have make-up all over my face?”

  “Yup. You are a hot mess.”

  Krista crossed the couple feet separating them, slid her hands up his chest, and reached up on her tippy toes to kiss him. He complied eagerly, but not with a rush of passion. He wanted to hold her, cuddle with her. He wanted it soft, full of feeling.

  When she stepped away, she was awestruck and doe-eyed. And for the first time, it made him feel like a man, instead of irritated that a woman was still there. It was a good change.

  She had said, “Big risk, bigger payoff.” He hoped she was right.

  “And bad breath,” he said in a grave voice.

  Krista scoffed and slapped his chest as she turned away. He caught her from behind laughing and kissed her neck and ears, tickling her with his breath. She giggled and squirmed until he let her loose with a slap on her butt.

  Cassie was at the table, eating cereal.

  “Good morning,” she said with a chipper voice.

  Krista mumbled a response as Sean wished the same to her.

  “Did you guys have a good rest?”

  Krista sat as she said, “Like a log actually. Not usual for sleeping in someon--”

  She cut off abruptly.

  Sean paused with the coffee pot in his hand and a smile on his face. Most men would probably be pissed that she was thinking about other experiences, but Sean was no pot pointing fingers at a kettle. Instead, he was happy she was already comfortable sleeping by his side. That was a good sign, because he could have said exactly what she did, and it would have been just as true.

  However, he couldn’t let her get away with it. He yelled, “I know where that was going!”

  He walked out with two steaming mugs, interrupting Cassie and Krista exchanging a knowing look.

  “Do you?” Krista said, reaching for coffee. “You knew I was going to say, ‘Not usual when I watch Sean sleep, since I’m usually looking through the peephole in the rafters?’”

  “I knew there was a draft coming from somewhere!” he laughed before he took a sip of his coffee.

  Krista stayed for about a half hour, made plans with Cassie, and headed on her way. Sean followed her to the door.

  “Thank you for last night, Krista. You--it ended perfectly,” Sean said, seriously.

  “Thank you, too. Twice,” she answered with a leer and a wink.

  He laughed, thankful she could see it with humor. She wrapped her arms around him, hugging tightly. Before she stepped away, she slid her palms down his chest. He had no idea how long he’d be able to keep from thrusting inside her. He wanted her so bad it was a constant distraction.

  “Okay, buddy, see you tonight,” he said with a smirk, seeing that soft look of love in her eyes again. And for the first time, liking it.

  “Buddy, is it? I thought we were friends?”

  “Buddy is closer than friend.”

  “Ah. Well, thank you, Professor, for explaining the elevated details on friendship.”

  “No problem. I know you can be dense, and I like to help.”

  “Humph.”

  Krista walked off in oversized sweats and T-shirt, on high heels, with dress in hand. Sean couldn’t help yelling, “Hot mess!” for all the neighborhood to hear. It was a fantastic walk of shame.

  “How’d last night go?” Cassie asked when he returned to the table.

  “I sure hope I don’t mess this one up, Cass,” he said sadly.

  She nodded, “You still like her, then.”

  Sean nodded, too, “A lot. I like her more now, after last night, than I ever have. I just…hope I don’t screw it up, you know?”

  “She is tough, I think,” Cassie said reassuringly. “She is tough and she likes you. Ray said she wouldn’t even look at you until you stopped playing games. If it took her this long to give in, it will take her longer to give up. I have a good feeling about this one, Sean. I really do.”

  “I hope you’re right.”

  Cassie got up and flicked him in the head. “I’m always right, you should know that by now.”

  Sean mock huffed as she left the room.

  ~*~*~*~

  Later that night Cassie met up with Krista at her house and braved public transportation to the Mission, against Sean’s better judgment. They were both dressed in going-out attire, which meant cleavage, tight pants, and sparkly jewelry. Krista made sure to tell Cassie not to overdress, though. Skinny jeans and a cute shirt would suffice. The Mission was a casual place and they should fit in. For a crowd that pretended they didn’t care what people thought, hipsters had some serious rules to live by.

  On the way to the bar, Cassie asked, “So, how’s it going with my brother?”

  Krista was immediately on her guard. “Am I talking to friend or foe?”

  “Friend. Confidante. Advice center should you need it. I really want him to be happy, and you make him happy. He...has a hard time with attachments...”

  “He is his own worst enemy. He told me why.”

  She sighed, apparently feeling like a load was taken off. Krista didn’t plan to warn her about sighing around Jasmine. The fun was in the surprise.

  “Yeah, our parents. I have a similar problem, but not nearly as bad because of Sean. He’s the oldest, which means, according to my parents, he was the first to ruin their lives. I came along four years later, so their lives were already destroyed by that point. I was only reminded what I kept them from when I was in trouble—mostly by my mother. Sean was reminded constantly, by both. Their marriage was his fault, as was their divorce. As were most of the fights. He had it pretty hard.”

  Cassie shrugged, her eyes faraway, “But despite that, or maybe because of it, he always looked after me. He helped me with my homework, he played with me—he even caught a bus once, at ten years old, to watch my first dance recital because my parents weren’t planning to go. He got in trouble for it, too. He was my guiding light growing up.”

  Krista nodded, but she didn’t know what to say. Cassie didn’t have to tell her any of this. It was extremely personal. But helpful, too, in a way. Krista had no idea he’d had to deal with that. His whole life. Probably still. She also had no idea what it was like. It was a kind of emotional abuse she hadn’t even learned about through movies.

  “I didn’t mean to ruin your day,” Cassie said with a sad smile. “Just thought it would help you. He means well, but sometimes he has a problem with self-worth. As you can imagine.”

  “I can’t imagine, actually. I knew nothing of that growing up. My parents are still married. They tried for me for three years. Nearly gave up. I was the gleam in their eye, so to speak. I was their miracle. Spoiled rotten, too, until my sister came two and a half years later. Then we were both spoiled rotten. She and I are rivals in everything, but I’m bigger, so I beat her up.” Krista snickered. “She’s a clever little bitch, though. She plays some pretty outstanding, though mean, practical jokes.”

  Cassie laughed, “I would have liked to have had a sister. Or a normal family. Or someone to mess around with. I couldn’t really mess around with Sean. When I tried to be mean, or punch him, or if I threw a tantrum, he just waited patiently until I stopped and then lectured me on why
that was bad behavior. I wouldn’t trade him for the world, but one fight might be nice.”

  “You guys are really close.”

  “Yes, we are. Much to the irritation of my boyfriends.”

  “You would think they’d be thankful it was your brother and not your first love or something.”

  “Men,” Cassie rolled her eyes, watching a man at the back of the train with the largest pants they’d ever seen. The man wasn’t obese, either. He was young and in shape. The pants were decorated on the pockets with rhinestones and colored thread, held up by an overworked belt. He was a fashion statement that mumbled.

  “Say no more,” Krista laughed. “But yeah, we nearly had a meltdown last night. We made it through.”

  “I like how you say ‘we,’ even though I’m sure you were his guiding light.”

  “Not so much guiding as bitchy. I threw a lot of emotional crap at him to even be friends. Now it’s his turn to be unhinged.”

  “You have such an honest, refreshing way of communicating. I can see he’s in good hands.”

  “I wouldn’t know about him being in good hands--I’m as screwed up as anyone you’ll probably meet. But as far as honest, you’ll get a whole lot of that with Kate and Jasmine. It kind of rubs off.”

  Cassie looked at her searchingly. She could tell Cassie was really rooting for her to succeed with Sean. It made her realize just how dire Sean’s issues really were. Krista never backed away from a challenge, and nothing ever seemed easy, but she wondered if she was in over her head with this one. She was no psychiatrist.

  They got to the restaurant and met up with Jasmine and Kate, who remembered Cassie a lot better than Krista did, though they were obviously wondering how she ended up hanging out with all of them.

  Krista had already decided she wasn’t going to tell them about Sean and last night just yet, which she told Cassie. If they weren’t working with her, it would’ve been different, but she didn’t want gossip, and Kate was liable to let something slip, especially with Marcus on the scene. That guy could ferret out information better than anyone.

  Dinner was delicious, as expected. It was a tapas place that never really changed their menu, but never really had to. The place was always busy, even on weekdays.

  After they left, they just sort of picked a bar at random and kept going from there. Some bars were better than others, and some had more potent drinks than others, but all were fun in their own way. In one bar, which by rights was a dive bar, Cassie started on margaritas.

  “Ooooh, Cassie be careful with this bar and margaritas,” Krista warned. “They don’t mess around here.”

  “It’s only $7, though. For a pint glass full! How potent can it be and still make money?”

  “Honey,” Jasmine said, stepping up, “we are in the Mission in a dive bar that has been here forever. Rent is cheap, their upkeep looks nonexistent, and they have a big clientele. They can afford to over pour. And they do. Seriously.”

  “But they make it from scratch. The bartender told me he makes a mean margarita,” she persisted.

  “Uh-oh, the bartender likes her. We are fucked,” Kate said from behind them. She shoved her way through the wall of women, got to the bar, and ordered four margaritas. The middle-aged, though still emo/punk, bartender smiled and got to work.

  “We might as well all sink with the ship, huh?” Kate said, putting money on the bar.

  Krista shook her head, careful not to sigh. Sean would find four puddles of women when he finally got there.

  Sure enough, not only did the bartender always have a heavy hand, he made these drinks especially strong. They shouldn’t have gone up for the second, but they were also extremely delicious. After two, they were all tossed.

  “Let’s move on,” Krista yelled over the music.

  “Where?” Jasmine yelled back.

  “Elbow Room. We need to dance off some of this alcohol!”

  Kate nodded, unceremoniously yanked Cassie to her feet, and away they went. It wasn’t until they were stumbling down the street that Krista heard her phone.

  “Oh crap!” Krista said, remembering that she was supposed to be watching the time. She had no idea how long they lingered over those margaritas, just that it wasn’t long enough.

  Everyone stopped and looked.

  “Go ahead, I’ll be there in a minute.” Krista gave Cassie a longish look that thankfully Jaz and Kate were too drunk to catch.

  “Is that that Paul guy again?” Cassie asked.

  Thank God for her good memory and quick thinking under fire.

  “Yeah,” Krista rolled her eyes. “He won’t let it rest.”

  Kate groaned and pulled Cassie along behind her. “You know where we’ll be.”

  “No shots!” Krista yelled after them. When Kate started to get drunk, she jumped on the shot train and the night went black quicker than a power outage.

  Krista had missed the call, so she called Sean back, seeing that it was half past ten.

  “Hello?” he sounded irritated.

  “Sorry! I’m sorry! We had these super strong margaritas and I lost track of time.”

  “You sound like you had a truck load of margaritas.”

  “Two actually. Well, beer before that, but the bartender liked Cassie, and we were at Kilowatz, and you know Kilowatz, so Kate said we’d all have one. So we did. Then the bartender bought us all a round, so we drank that. Then we tipped him a good tip and left. But don’t worry, I didn’t tell him where we were going next. Cassie is in the protective folds of womanhood.”

  There was silence.

  “Hello?” Krista asked, checking to see if her phone was still on. It was. And connected.

  “Are you mad?” she asked quietly—as quietly as a drunk person could talk, anyway.

  “Mad, no. Worried, yes. Should I walk into this drunken woman fest?”

  “Yes, please. I want to see you. I didn’t tell Jaz and Kate about us, so you have to play it cool. And I know, no sex. I’ll try to remember. If you have any friends, though, you might bring them.”

  “I’m not enough for you?”

  “You’re funnier in person, which isn’t saying much.”

  He laughed, “Okay. Where will you be?”

  “Kilowatz. No wait, we just left there. ELBOW ROOM, Elbow Room. They are already there. You might just come in. Time is flying, yo. I told them not to get the margaritas from that place! They wouldn’t listen. Your sister is sure stubborn.”

  Sean was laughing again. “Okay. I look forward to seeing you.”

  “Who doesn’t? Ciao!”

  She stumbled her way to Elbow Room, got let in with no charge--probably due to boob oozing everywhere—and found the girls on the dance floor. She immediately joined in.

  After an amount of time that a drunk person is incapable of measuring, Kate grabbed her arm and dragged her to the bar. She yelled, “--who is here!!”

  “WHAT?” Krista screamed. She couldn’t hear a blessed thing.

  “Here, drink this,” Jasmine said, handing Krista a shot.

  “No way! No WAY! I said no shots!” Krista yelled at the whole bar.

  Cassie elbowed Kate out of the way, grabbed the shot, and attempted to grab Krista’s nose. Apparently she was trying to plug it so she could pour the shot down Krista’s throat. She was so determined, and it was so absurd, that Krista laughed and tried to bat her hands away. Cassie, not to be deterred, managed to get Krista’s nose and was moving in with the shot when she felt a hard body against her back.

  Thinking it was some clown, Krista got sidetracked trying to move away and Cassie got the shot to her lips. It was horrible tequila.

  Krista swallowed and sputtered, her stomach instantly churning. “You bitch!” she yelled, coughing.

  Cassie pointed and laughed before putting the empty shot glass on the bar and heading back to the dance floor.

  Krista felt two hands slide around her waist and knew immediately it was Sean. She leaned back against him, then remembered Jaz
and Kate. She straightened up quickly and turned around to face him.

  He was smiling down at her. Laughing down at her more like.

  “Having fun?” he asked.

  “Your sister literally just poured a shot down my throat. You saw it! I know you did! Could you not have warned me about her?”

  “The fun is in the surprise.”

  “I was just thinking that earlier tonight!”

  His hair was in disarray, his polo shirt was rumpled, and his jeans just wouldn’t quit. And while he was hot, and definitely sexy, Krista just wanted to be near him. A check told her Jaz and Kate were dancing with Cassie. Knowing they wouldn’t notice her gone for at least ten more minutes, she moved in closer.

  “Hey baby,” he said as he slid his arms around her back.

  “Hi. I’m glad you came.” Then, because slightly leaning wasn’t close enough, she slipped her arms around his middle and angled her head to be kissed. She didn’t care who saw, and if he tried to play it cool, she had already planned to give him a titty-twister, and then embarrass him somehow.

  Thankfully, he had no such thing in mind. He bent his head to meet her lips, and let their kiss linger, then blossom until they were flat-out making out. It was Krista who finally pushed him off—she was a little too drunk to close her eyes while upright for that long.

  “Wow,” she said breathlessly. Then, because she could, she grabbed his crotch.

  “JE-sus,” Sean said, jumping back before he could stop himself. He had a lopsided grin as he said, “Yes, you doing that at work might have been awkward. But I would have acclimated like a champ.”

  Krista laughed and leaned in again. He put an arm around her shoulders and led her closer to the bar. “I need to get a beer. You want anything?”

  “Beer. No wait. No, nothing. Okay, beer.”

  Krista noticed for the first time that he was in a group. “Oh hey, you brought the actors.”

  Sean yelled over the din for a bunch of beers--apparently he was buying for the cast--and turned back. “Yeah, they were relieved I was finally heading somewhere decent rather than the Sunset.”