by A'zayler
After exhaling deeply, Yeshi grabbed his chest and laughed. “Girl, you had me scared as fuck.” He ran his hand over his face. “I’m gon’ have to start buying condoms. I been fucking around too bad.”
He and Logan were both laughing when the young man came up and told him his truck was ready. Still in relief from her joke, Yeshi grabbed her hand and bit the tips of her fingers playfully.
“You happy ain’t it?” Logan raised her eyebrows.
“Hell yeah.”
She laughed again. “I’ve been telling you to stop being so careless. That could have been real.”
“I know now,” he told her while helping her into his truck.
With both of his hands on her small waist, Yeshi lifted her up into the passenger side of his truck. The moment her butt was in his face, he bit it. A small yelp came from her at the same time she reached behind her and smacked his arm. Yeshi and a few of the men behind him laughed as he closed the door and rounded the truck.
Once inside, he cranked up and drove out of the parking lot. Every so often he would look over at Logan. She was chilling comfortably in her seat and looking out of the window. The dark grey sweat suit she had on looked good on her. He’d never seen her dressed like that, and he loved it.
“I like your li’l outfit.” He touched the side of her jacket.
Logan looked down and smiled. “Thank you. Where we going?”
“Well, I have an AA meeting in about thirty minutes, so there first, and then I have a surprise for you.”
She looked at him after that admission. “What you got?” she asked giddily.
Yeshi basked in the smile on her face before winking. “You’ll see.”
He could tell by the way she moved around in her seat that she was trying to suppress her excitement, and for what he had in store for her, she should. It had been hard trying to plan a surprise dinner in such short notice, but with the help of Killian, he’d gotten it done. He was sure it had been East doing everything, but since she still wasn’t fucking with him, she’d had Killian doing all the talking and leg work.
“Since when do you want me to come to your AA meetings?” Logan looked at him with her chin resting in the palm of her hand.
“Since they’re making me bring you.” Yeshi sucked his teeth. “Believe me, I gave them hell about it.”
Logan giggled, but he was serious. The moment his sponsor told him that he had to bring Logan to the next group session, he’d nearly cursed her out in protest. The only reason he’d agreed to it was that it was one of the last steps he needed to complete. As much as he hadn’t wanted to go to the meetings at first, they’d helped him, so whatever they had for Logan to do, he was sure would be beneficial to him once again.
“Why you ain’t want me to come?”
“This shit is embarrassing, and you’ve witnessed enough of my embarrassing moments to last us a lifetime.”
“You don’t have to be ashamed in front of me. I won’t judge you.”
His eyes left the road and went to her. “I know, but still. I’m a man, and I don’t want to look weak. This alcoholic shit makes me weak, and I hate it.”
Yeshi was doing his best not to ruin his mood, so versus continuing to talk about it, he put his hand on her thigh and gave it a light squeeze.
“But, fuck all that, birthday girl. You ready for tomorrow?”
Logan gushed with happiness. “Yep! I don’t even know what I want to do. I’m just excited. I’m normally single on my birthdays.”
“You still single.” Yeshi laughed when she punched him. “Hell you talking about?”
“You are so stupid.” She hit him again before laughing. “I’m glad to know that’s how you feel.”
“Why?”
“Now, I can give these other niggas some play.” She tooted her mouth up. “They’ve been shooting their shots for weeks now, and I just be turning them down.” Logan looked out the window and flipped some of her hair over her shoulder. “Wanting to take me out for my birthday and stuff. And to think I was actually curving them.”
Her sarcastic tone was annoying the fuck out of him. “Yo, you acting real reckless right now.”
“How so? I’m a single woman. Ain’t nothing reckless about entertaining men.”
Yeshi’s nose jumped on one side as he looked at her. “You really don’t believe that I will act a fucking fool on you, do you?”
Logan touched the center of her chest and gasped. “On me? Really? For what?”
“Don’t play with me.”
“Why not? You’re playing with me.”
“No, the fuck I ain’t.”
Logan nodded and said something under her breath, totally ignoring the look he was giving her. Unable to stare at her the way he wanted to, Yeshi’s eyes went back to the road. He drove in silence the rest of the way, boiling over the thought of her being with another man. Ever since East had said that dumb shit to him about hooking her up, he’d been on pins and needles. He trusted Logan but not East.
That was one female who was too hype for her own good. He wasn’t as calm as Killian. He would really fuck her up if she did that dumb shit. Which, he knew she would, and that was another reason for his current discomfort. Not to mention the guilt he felt for sexing Jerian. He didn’t necessarily acknowledge God the way he should, but he was a firm believer in having to reap what he’d sown, and that was most definitely not what he needed right then. He was barely himself, and he would go ape shit with no hesitation.
“Logan, don’t fucking play with me,” he warned her after he’d allowed the voices in his head to get the best of him.
“Yeshi, hush.” She laughed him off without even looking at him.
That infuriated him, so when he snatched her way rougher than he’d intended, and she slapped his face lightly but hard enough to hurt, he didn’t even bother to scold her about it.
“Don’t pull on me like that, Yeshi. I’m not a child.”
“My fault.”
“It sure was.”
“I just don’t like to be ignored.”
Logan turned her nose up at him. “There’s a lot of stuff that I don’t like, but I don’t go around here snatching on you to express myself. Don’t do that no more.”
Yeshi popped both sides of his neck before nodding once. “I won’t.”
The atmosphere in the truck had shifted so fast that he wasn’t sure what he wanted to say or do next. All he knew was that he was ready to get somewhere else. Sitting in his truck that close to her with her feeling some type of way about him had him going a little crazy in his mind. There was no telling what his forcefulness had made her think of him, and he didn’t need her to get any wild thoughts about leaving him because that wasn’t happening.
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine.”
He stole a glance at her while parking. She was laid back in the seat chilling comfortably while scrolling on her phone. The light brown hair he loved so much flowed around her face while her eyebrows scrunched together at whatever she was looking at. The nervous, possessive part of him wanted to lean over to see what had her attention, but he didn’t.
“I don’t know what they’re going to say or make us do when we get in here, so just bear with me.”
She nodded but didn’t look his way.
“Look at me, so I’ll know you’re not mad at me.”
When she didn’t move as fast as she normally did, he grabbed the bottom of her face and turned her head for her. Her light-colored eyes sparkled every time she blinked. Since Yeshi wasn’t sure what he wanted to say, he said nothing. Just looked at her. She looked back until he licked his lip and winked at her. Like she always did, she looked away and started blushing.
“I love your smile.”
“I love yours too,” she whispered before leaning over the console and kissing his mouth.
Their tongues did their own little thing until she pulled away and pecked his jaw. “Let’s get out and get this over with.”
Yeshi nodded because he agreed. They were out and heading inside shortly after with him holding her hand the whole way. He’d become so familiar with the building that he was able to get where he needed to go with his eyes closed. The large group of people seated together all looked at them upon their entry. Of course, Logan was smiling and waving happily as they made their way deeper into the room.
A multitude of hellos followed them to their seats. Yeshi avoided all eye contact and focused on Logan. She looked so relaxed and comfortable that she was able to help him relax. He eventually began to look around at every else’s family member who had come with them. Only a few people were still alone, which made him a bit sad.
Had his situation happened at any other time, he would have been alone as well. His throat got tight as his sister popped into his mind. She’d been alone. Out on the streets by herself, probably going from one dope house to another until she died…alone.
“It’ll be okay soon.” Logan’s lips pressed against the side of his face.
Yeshi quickly looked at her. “How do you know something is wrong with me?”
Her angel face was comforting. “I can see it on you. Whatever it is will all be okay soon.”
When she patted the top of his hand with hers, he held it up and kissed it. “You don’t know what it means to me to have you here.”
“God knew you needed me.”
Yeshi didn’t speak, he just stared until his sponsor walked to the front of the room to get everything started. He was an older black man who had been sober for the past twenty years and had been living to help others ever since. When Yeshi first met him, he’d wanted so badly not to like him, but it had been hard to keep an attitude with the man for no reason, so he’d eventually opened up and tried to get to the bottom of his problems.
“I don’t want to do this,” Yeshi whispered after his sponsor, Mr. Middleton, called him and Logan to the front of the room.
It was their turn to tell everyone about themselves and their action plan to keep Yeshi sober. That was the dumbest shit Yeshi had ever heard, but, of course, he kept it to himself. They could tell the world how they planned to keep him sober, but it would all be pointless if it never worked. He’d already found his own way, but nobody had to tell him that wasn’t the way. An occasional drink to take the edge off worked just fine for him, but that was one little bit he planned to keep to himself.
“Just come on.” Logan stood to her feet, and he was momentarily distracted by all the sexual attraction he felt for her.
After a deep exhale, Yeshi stood to his feet, way taller than Logan, but followed her lead. She moved around the people in their path until she’d gotten into the free aisle to walk easier. The moment they stopped in front of everyone, she reached behind her and grabbed his hand. Yeshi stood next to her with one hand in his pocket and the other enveloped with hers.
His posture was lazy, his head was leaned to the side, and his face was sure to show his annoyance. Logan, on the other hand, was her happy self, standing there smiling at everybody like a damn kindergarten teacher in Pleasantville.
“Yeshi, you all can start whenever you’re ready.”
“Where you want us to start?” Yeshi’s voice was just as dry as he felt.
“How about you tell us who this young lady is, how you met her, and how she’s helped you.”
Yeshi frowned. Why in the fuck did he need to say all of that? He was nowhere near shy, but standing in front of a room full of strangers and telling about the most humiliating part of his life was not something he wanted to do. He was quiet for a long time, probably looking like a whole fool up there frowning, but he didn’t care. Maybe if he stood there not saying anything long enough, they’d let him and Logan sit back down.
“Hello, everybody, my name is Logan.”
Yeshi quickly looked down at her and frowned deeper. Her plan ruining ass. Always happy about some shit. He sucked his teeth and shook his head.
“I’m Yeshi’s personal angel. I was sent into his life by God and a close friend of ours. We’ve known each other for a couple of months now, and Yeshi is so perfect.” Logan wrapped both of her arms around one of his and leaned into him with a large smile on her face. “He was lost, but God says that his arm is never too short to save us, nor is his ear too dull to hear. He heard Yeshi’s cries and sent him to me.”
“Aww,” one of the ladies swooned and made Yeshi frown harder.
She needed to shut her ass up and let Logan talk. He hadn’t wanted to participate at first but listening to Logan speak about him brought along a sudden change of heart.
“Are you Yeshi’s girlfriend?” the same lady who had been making all those damn movie noises asked.
“No, just his friend.”
“You two look like you’re in love.”
“Oh my god,” Yeshi groaned in annoyance, and Logan snickered.
“Stop being like that.” She nudged his body with her shoulder. “We’re just spiritually connected is all.”
“Well, he’d better keep you.” The lady smiled and gave Yeshi the thumbs up.
Yeshi completely disregarded her and looked at Mr. Middleton. “Is that all we need to do?”
“Almost. Yeshi, I would like for you to tell us your plan to stay sober.”
Yeshi shrugged. “It ain’t no damn plan. I quit drinking, I don’t put myself in situations that involve alcohol, and I’m learning to practice self-control. That’s all I can do.”
“Logan?” Middleton questioned.
“It’s Yeshi’s journey. If that’s how he plans to make it work, I’ll add in some prayer and a whole lot of Jesus, and we’ll find our way.”
Quiet laughter came after her comment. Logan even joined in. Yeshi, on the other hand, was irritated and ready to go. He’d had enough, and it was really starting to blow his mood. When they were finally able to leave, Yeshi nearly ran out of the door. Logan stayed behind talking to a few of his group members before joining him in the truck.
As soon as she was in her seatbelt, he pulled out and headed down the street. Logan was quiet for a minute until she snapped her finger and turned toward him.
“Can you run me by East’s house really quick? I left my air buds in her car yesterday when we went to lunch.”
Yeshi’s stomach flipped because that meant he would have to see Jerian. That was about to be uncomfortable as shit.
“Man, I had something I wanted to take you to do.”
“We can still do that. It won’t take me long to grab them. I just don’t want them to get lost or thrown away.”
“Aight.” Yeshi gave in and took the route to Killian’s house.
He was so quiet the whole way there that he’d almost given himself away.
“What’s wrong with you? Why you so quiet?” Logan watched him. “Is it the group?”
Yeshi nodded to throw her off some.
“You don’t have to feel weird around me, Yeshi. I like you. I like who you are, what you are, and everything you’re going to be. I don’t think any of this defines you. Just a small hurdle to cross.”
Since they’d just pulled into the driveway, Yeshi didn’t bother to respond. Not that he knew what to say anyway. Logan was too sweet and too good for him. That was obvious, but just like his alcohol addiction, he wasn’t letting her go. The feeling he received was too heavily desired.
“You not getting out?” Logan raised her eyebrows at him.
“I hadn’t planned on it.”
“Boy, if you don’t get out of this truck and come on.”
Yeshi sucked his teeth while watching her hop to the ground. He was right behind her and following her to the door. It didn’t take long at all for Killian to open it. He smiled at Logan the moment he laid eyes on her. When she stepped in, he hugged her before looking at Yeshi with an unreadable expression. Yeshi wondered what that was about but didn’t ask right away.
“Where’s East?”
“In the kitchen, you can go ahead.” Killian ushered her
away.
Once she was out of earshot, Killian checked behind him once again before looking back at Yeshi. He even pushed him backward some.
“Nigga, what the fuck did I tell you? Didn’t I tell you not to fuck that fucking girl?”
“How you know I fucked her?” Yeshi remained calm.
“East saw your fucking truck outside last night. You know she be up all times of the night.” Killian shook his head in disappointment. “She woke me up talking about Jerian’s ass was out there with you. I tried to make her get in the bed, but she wasn’t trying to hear shit I was saying.”
“Fuck.” Yeshi looked toward the kitchen where Logan had gone. “You think she’ll tell Logan?”
“Nah, she ain’t gon’ want to hurt her feelings, but Jerian don’t give a fuck. You better get your ass in there and get that girl before it be some shit.” Killian nodded toward the kitchen. “The fuck you bring her over here for any damn way? Your dumb ass.”
Yeshi’s hand slid over his waves. “She begged me. I ain’t want to. What East say?”
“Oh, she ain’t fucking with your ass. I had to damn near get between her and Jerian last night. She was in that girl’s face the moment she walked through the door. They were finna beat the shit out of each other.”
Yeshi and Killian both began to laugh hysterically.
“For real. She wanted to come out to your truck, but you know I wasn’t about to let her do that shit.”
“Good shit.” Yeshi stuck his hand out for a pound. Killian bumped his fist against it.
“You know it, but you better get your ass in the kitchen. If your women start fighting, that’s your fight to referee. I ain’t doing it.”
They laughed again.
“Come with me.”
Killian smirked. “You scared?”
Yeshi looked at him as if he should have already known the answer to that. “Nigga, hell yeah.”
The two friends strolled toward the kitchen with Killian leading the way. Yeshi did his best to think of a time when he’d been as nervous as he was right then and failed. He was in some serious shit and hoped like hell Killian could get him out of it.
“Lord, please help me.”
His head fell forward as soon as he recognized his go to thing was prayer. Logan was rubbing off on him. Hopefully, her calming spirit had as well.