Montana Guardian: A Guardian Security Novella (The Kings of Guardian)

by Kris Michaels

  “Am I his father?” Van’s large hand cradled the baby to her breast. His thumb stroked Samuel’s cheek as he fed.

  Cassie closed her eyes. She was dying inside, but she wouldn’t corner him into taking care of them. “I’m going to go back to Guardian. I think I know someone who will help me get on my feet. We’ll be okay. I’m not asking you for anything.” Van stiffened behind her.

  “Is he my son?”

  The words were low, and she tensed. Fear coiled in her gut. “Yes. I’ve never been with anyone else.”

  Van didn’t move or speak for several minutes. "You were a virgin." The statement didn't need acknowledgement, but she nodded anyway. His hand shook as he trailed it up her uninjured arm. "I didn't know." He placed his chin against her head and whispered, "Thank you for that gift."

  Emotion of every imaginable type flitted one after another across her consciousness as she held her son in her arms and was cradled by the man she loved. The man she'd left. A streak of apprehension disturbed the beginnings of hope. What would that action cost her?

  When it was time, Van helped her switch Samuel to her other breast. He nursed for a few minutes before he slowed. Samuel struggled to stay awake, the babe was exhausted. Cassie took him off her breast and closed her shirt while Van held him. He lowered Samuel into her arm. The one that didn’t hurt. Cassie’s thought process faltered when she tried to figure out how to raise him onto her shoulder and burp him.

  “Why didn’t you tell me?”

  She froze, her eyes darted around her. There was anger in his voice. Cassie knew anger. She knew how to react to anger. Instantly, she curled in on herself, jolting forward and bracing herself on her injured arm so she could hold Samuel tight with her good arm. She cried out as she collapsed around Samuel. Instinct told her to protect him from the beating she knew always followed anger.

  “Don’t, please! Don’t hurt him. He’s all I have.” Cassie begged as she covered her son with her body. The absolute lack of any other sound except Samuel’s cries confused her. Cassie took the chance to glance Van’s way. She didn’t understand the devastated look she saw.

  “What did you live through to react like that?” Van lifted away from her and went to the far side of the fire, giving her space. He sat down and stared at her. “I’m not going to hurt you, Cassie. I would never touch you, or my son, in anger.”

  Her reaction to his question ripped his guts out. His heart, the woman he loved, lay in the dirt, covering his son, begging him not to hurt their baby. He’d seen reactions like hers before. Prisoners with PTSD who’d been rescued from hostile forces showed the same conditioned fear. He could only guess what those motherfuckers had done to her. The multitude of bruises that covered her exposed skin told a story. He’d examined her before Travis had reached them. She was covered in bruises, new and old. He’d prayed they had another source, but her reactions since she woke spoke volumes. Rage against the men who’d done this filled him.

  His gaze traveled across the distance and met the cold stare of one of the men responsible for Cassie’s injuries, both mental and physical. Her family had done this to her, the people who were supposed to protect her and care for her.

  “What did you have to live through to react to me that way?” The question was rhetorical. He could guess, but he probably needed to hear it in her words. He rose, went to the other side of the fire and sat down, facing her. He was going to make them pay. “I’m not going to hurt you, Cassie. I would never touch you, or my son, in anger.”

  She sat up and faced away from him. He let her compose herself and quiet the baby…his son. Van fed the fire and warmed an MRE for her.

  “I’m sorry.”

  Her soft words barely reached him. He didn’t know how to respond to that. What in the hell was she sorry for? He had so many questions. So much he needed to know. He kept his mouth shut and worked on getting some food into her.

  “I can’t lift him to burp him.”

  “I’ll do that while you eat.” He opened her warmed MRE pouch and poured the contents onto the camp plate along with a piece of pound cake and several crackers with a packet of peanut butter. He moved slowly while he made his way around the fire. She watched him with those big brown eyes, never once looking away. The fear that now haunted her gaze hadn’t been there a year ago. She was shy and quiet when he’d met her. Now, she was wounded and lost. He set the plate down, along with a canteen of water. He extended his arm toward her slowly, taking the child and lifting him to his shoulder. He leaned back against a log that Travis had drug over near the fire to sit on when he’d arrived earlier. Van draped the fleece shirt over the little body and tapped his tiny back gently. Samuel snuggled into his neck sucking on his fist. “Am I doing this right?”

  Other than doing the shit he witnessed on television and the bumbling around earlier today, Van had zero experience with kids. He didn’t want to screw up and break his son.

  “You won’t hurt him. Rub his back every now and then. It helps to dislodge the gas.”

  Van glanced down at the little body before his eyes returned to Cassie. She reached out and snagged the canteen, lifting it to her lips, drinking deeply.

  “Don’t chug the water. You’ve probably got one hell of a concussion.” He hated to stop her, but he needed to make sure she didn’t get sick.

  She immediately set the canteen down as if it had burned her. “I’m sorry.”

  Van shook his head. “You’ve nothing to be sorry about. I just didn’t want you to get sick. Eat, but take it slowly. Make sure your stomach and head can handle the food and water.”

  Cassie looked at him before she reached out for the plate. She lifted the fork and glanced back at him.

  “Go ahead, eat.” Van kept his voice low as if he was talking to a frightened animal. She ate with one eye on him—as if he was going to take her food away.

  Samuel let out a huge burp startling Van into a laugh. He ran his palm over his son’s back. “How old is he?”

  Cassie stopped with a forkful of food halfway to her mouth. “Two months…maybe? The moon has been full twice since I had him.”

  “You don’t know what day he was born?”

  “No. They wouldn’t have told me if I asked.”

  Cassie waited, but when he didn’t speak again, she lifted the spoon and ate some more. He gave her several minutes before he asked, “Why did you stay?”

  “It wasn’t by choice. I tried to leave after I first came back. My uncle beat me up pretty good when Mom told them I was pregnant. I knew I had to leave then, but Mom wouldn’t come with me. I tried to convince her that I could take care of her…there were people who would help us. She didn’t believe me. I begged Mom to come with me, but she wouldn’t. I had to protect my unborn child, so I left.” Cassie glanced down the meadow toward the granite face of the mountain. “Mom followed me. I didn’t know. She’d told me she couldn’t leave my father. I made it down the face.” Cassie looked at the huge granite surface, apparently lost in memories. She sighed and continued, “I was starting across the meadow when I heard her scream. She must have tripped over something. I found her at the base. She lived for about five minutes. My uncle found me with her. I remember a fist…” Cassie set the plate down and moved closer to the fire. “They kept me locked up in the cabin until I was too far along to try to come down. Then after I had him…no one would be stupid enough to take a baby down this mountain without protection.” As if to punctuate her statement the sound of a wolf cry, plaintive and eerie, rolled through the meadow.

  “And yet, you did.” Van continued to rub his son’s back.

  Cassie gave a single dip to her chin. “Yeah, two nights ago, they…” Her shoulders lifted in a shuddering sigh… “I had to leave. They were going to kill us. The only question was when. At least we had a chance this way.”

  Van closed his eyes. If they hadn’t been sent here, Cassie would be dead and his son…fuck, he opened his eyes again and glared across the clearing at the waste of s
perm that had abused his family.

  “Why didn’t you tell me about him? Did you know before you left me?” He manned up and picked that scab in front of her. His emotions bled out. He could tell she saw the hurt and maybe the loneliness, but he needed to know. He deserved an answer.

  “I was with you for three months. I know how you feel about women and families.” Cassie glanced at him. Her sad, small voice made no sense whatsoever to him.

  “You know how I feel about families? I…I don’t understand. We talked a lot, but never about that. Did we?” Van lowered Samuel and tucked him into his arm, holding him like a football. He wrapped the fleece around his arm, making sure to keep his son warm. Warm, dry and fed. Travis’s words had echoed around his head all afternoon.

  “You talked with your men. When you did, I listened.” Cassie shrugged with her good arm. “I couldn’t be one of the women you talked about.”

  “What?” Van was completely lost. What women had they talked about? He searched his brain for any memory of him talking with his men about families. He couldn’t remember a single time they’d spoken about…oh…fuck. “You heard us giving each other shit, didn’t you? Did you think we were serious? We always dog on each other, but Cassie, each one of those men would be over the moon if they found a woman they could love, one that would love them back. And if that woman understood what they did? Every damn one of us would rotate the earth from its axis to keep her. What you heard was moronic bullshit that we spout to each other to keep us from fixating on the fact that we don’t have a woman or a family. It’s all a farce, a macho pretense.”

  Cassie stared across the campsite at him. “You didn’t.”

  Van blinked, trying to understand. “I didn’t what?”

  “You didn’t come after me.” She lowered her eyes and picked at a hole in her jeans.

  “You vanished without a word. I had no idea what was going through your head—or where you had gone. Believe it or not, I was hurt, and I was pissed. When I finally pulled my head out of my ass, I couldn’t get anything out of Guardian except that you had completed your contract. Whoever shielded your information did a fucking fantastic job.” Van struggled to control the anger he still felt. If he’d been able to find out where she lived, would he have searched her out? Hell, he didn’t know…no, fuck that, he’d have tracked her down and demanded to know what he’d done to make her run.

  “I told Jewell I’d come back if I felt like I was in danger. I tried. She wanted me to contact her and let her know about the baby. I couldn’t. My father hid the ham radio. I had no way of contacting her other than coming down the mountain.”

  “Jewell?”

  “Yes. Jewell King.”

  A light bulb pinged on. He was starting to get a picture. “She knew you were pregnant?”

  Cassie nodded.

  “Did she know the baby was mine?”

  Cassie nodded again, and Van laughed at his sudden insight. The Kings were notoriously family oriented. There was little doubt in his mind that he and Travis had been pawns in an operation manufactured by Cassie’s very powerful friend. When Cassie hadn’t made contact, he’d been sent to check up on her. He needed to make sure he sent that woman flowers. Or not. Rumor had it she was married to a former assassin. Former assassin…right, no such thing…just like there was no such thing as a former Marine. Van had no doubt the motto for Ms. King’s fiancé was, “once an assassin, always an assassin.” Maybe a quick phone call and a thank you would suffice.

  “Why are you laughing at me?”

  Van shook his head at her question. “I'm not. I'm actually marveling at the way things have happened. Come over here.” He lifted the arm that wasn’t holding his son. At Cassie’s hesitance, he smiled at her. “I wanted to find you. I was stonewalled. Every time I tried to get information on where you lived, I was blocked. I lost my shit when you left me, but, you need to know I haven’t been with anyone since you. I love you, Cassie. I was going to propose to you in Atlanta. I wanted to a month before we came back, but you deserved better than a twisted wire ring made at a makeshift camp in the mountains of Kashmir.”

  He witnessed the flash of emotion in her eyes as she lifted them to meet his. Van lowered his arm and adjusted the shirt over Samuel’s little body again. “I think Jewell King knew something wasn’t right. She split up my team to send me here, to find you. To give you a message.”

  “What was the message?” Cassie shifted and winced in discomfort.

  Van patted the ground next to him. “Please, I promise I’ll never touch you in anger, and I’ll never let anyone lay a hand on you or our son.” Van didn’t force the issue. He could only imagine how fragile Cassie’s grasp on everything was right now. He barely held back his overwhelming need to hold her close, so no one could ever hurt her again, but his gut told him that she needed to trust him enough to come to him. He couldn’t…no, he wouldn’t make her decisions for her.

  Cassie moved, slowly. She lifted to her knees and carefully shuffled over toward him. “What was the message?” She repeated her question as she came closer.

  Chapter 10

  Cassie longed to feel Van's warmth again. She shuffled on her knees, closer but not close enough that he could swing out and hit her. Although with Samuel in his arms, the danger wasn't hers, it was her son's.

  Van glanced down at Samuel again and tucked a small corner of the fleece shirt into the crook of his arm. "Jewell King told me to tell you that she had an assignment for you and I quote, ‘The puzzle master is necessary.’"

  Cassie sat on her heels. Jewell King told her she was necessary. She blinked, trying to gauge what those words meant, but without context, she was at a loss for how to solve that puzzle. She shot a quick glance at Van before her gaze wandered across the way. Her uncle's eyes fixed on her. Hatred and rage poured off him. "What will happen to him? To us?"

  Van glanced at her uncle before he looked down at Samuel. "He will be turned over to the authorities. He'll never hurt you again."

  Cassie knew the words should be a relief, but she didn't believe them. Her uncle and her father had scarred her so deeply, she doubted she'd ever forget the pain. She chose not to argue the point because making any comment on what Van said could cause him to be angry. She glanced at Samuel. Her hands itched with the need to hold her son.

  "I have a helicopter inbound. They will be here in the morning. First, we are stopping in Buckskin Junction. The local authorities will need to document the abuse you've suffered, and you need to make a report. Then we are going to a safe place. It isn't far by air. We'll stay there until we figure out what we want to do. Where we want to go."

  Cassie snapped her attention from her son to Van. "We?"

  He glanced down at the sleeping baby. "A man can raise a child with love."

  Cassie fell back and winced at the pain the sudden jarring impact caused. She shook her head, terror lacing its fingers through her entire body. "Please don't take my baby from me." She whispered the plea, afraid to say it out loud.

  Van's head snapped up. "Never. I would never take Samuel away from you. I won't force you to make any decisions, Cassie. We'll go as slow as you need, but I'm not giving up on you or my son. I loved you. I still do. No matter how much I told myself to forget you, that you'd played me, I couldn't do it. I couldn't stop wondering what I'd done wrong."

  Cassie scooted closer to him. Close enough that he could easily hit her if she made him angry. She strangled her fear and scooted even closer. She could feel his warm body. "I never wanted to leave you. I was afraid for my mom. My uncle said he’d kill her if I didn't come back." Cassie reached out and ran a dirty finger across the shirt that kept her son warm. "I think my uncle killed her anyway. I think he was at the top of the mountain and shoved her off the cliff. I can't prove it." Cassie glanced up quickly, caught Van's eyes and diverted hers immediately. "He said her death was my fault. He called me a murderer."

  "Where was your father?" Van shifted slightly, bringing their arms i
nto contact. Cassie flinched and pulled away.

  "He..." She drew as deep of a breath as she could and exhaled it while she stared out into the darkness. "He never stopped my uncle. I don't know if he didn't care or if he just hated me that much. He never hit me, but he never stopped my uncle from beating me, either."

  "Cassie?" She turned her attention back to Van. "Did he?" Van shifted and closed his eyes. "Did he rape you?"

  Cassie shook her head and refocused on the darkness that surrounded them. "No. There were times I thought he might, but...no." She glanced at Samuel again. "I want him to grow up in a good world. Not this one." She closed her eyes. "I'm so sorry."

  "For what?"

  "For everything." She opened her eyes and turned toward him, wrapping her good arm around her legs, holding on to the thin material of her jeans she propped her head on her knees as she stared at him. "The decisions I made hurt you. I never meant for that to happen. I believed the things you said to your team. Plus, I knew my mom would be badly hurt or killed if I didn't return. They always took their anger out on her, and sometimes me, but she shielded me from the majority of it. I... I felt like I had no choice but to come back. I knew they wouldn't be pleased I was pregnant, but I never imagined what happened. I actually thought they'd let me go."

  They sat in silence for a while longer. Cassie listened to the wolves crying back and forth, but the sound no longer punched spikes of fear through her.

  Van shifted Samuel into his other arm and tucked the shirt around his little body. "I think you made decisions based on what you knew to be true. I wish you would have talked to me. Maybe things would have been different, but hindsight is always twenty-twenty. From here on, we have to talk to each other. I have to know what you’re thinking and why. I swear on my life that I will never hurt you or Samuel. I'll never let another person raise a hand to you as long as I have breath in my lungs."