Learning to Stand

by Claudia Hall Christian

  “Do you think he finally arrived because you were there?”

  “If you saw Troy and Paddie together, you’d think so. Colin’s even thinking of asking Troy to be Paddie’s non-Catholic Godfather. They have such a connection.” Alex laughed. “Of course, we’re not having the wild fun you and I had. No Privates around to abuse.”

  Vince laughed. He helped her out of the rental car. Alex took off crutching across the parking lot.

  “Proving your crutch master status?” Vince laughed.

  “I have to keep my stamina up,” Alex said. “Troy keeps trying to beat me!”

  “You don’t get a handicap for your lime green arm cast?”

  “I should!”

  Laughing, Alex pressed the handicap button to open the doors. They moved from the bright parking lot to the nursing home lobby. Alex touched Vince’s arm. She nodded her head toward the hall where Krystal Joiner was walking toward them.

  “I’m glad you made it,” Krystal Joiner said. “Sue Ann’s been asking for you.”

  Krystal hugged Alex. Alex introduced Vince and they shook hands.

  “I’ll take you back,” Krystal said. Stopping at the edge of a sun drenched patio, Krystal added, “Be prepared. She’s… barely alive.”

  Alex nodded. She touched Vince’s arm and he stopped walking. Alex continued forward with Krystal. She saw a slight person wrapped in a cotton blanket sitting in a chair in the sun. When the person turned, she looked like a living skeleton. Her pale skin stretched over the bones of her face while her lips pressed together in a tight line. Sue Ann’s dark eyes flicked from Krystal to Alex.

  “Sue Ann, honey, this is Alex,” Krystal said. “Alex, why don’t you take the chair? I’ll keep your friend Vince company.”

  Sue Ann’s sunken eyes followed Alex’s movement. Alex sat in an adjacent orange plastic chair. She set her crutches under the chair to take Sue Ann’s extended hand. Sue Ann’s hand was ice cold.

  “You’re the Fey?” Sue Ann asked.

  “I’m Alex. It’s nice to meet you.”

  Sue Ann gasped a deep breath.

  “You and I have a lot in common,” Sue Ann said. “Cee Cee killed our loved ones.”

  Alex nodded.

  “Were you really as wounded as they say?” Sue Ann asked.

  “I’m not sure what they say, but it took me almost two full years to recover. And even then...” Alex gestured to the crutches.

  “Two years. I can’t imagine two years from now,” Sue Ann said.

  “Then we do have a lot in common,” Alex said. “I remember that feeling. Vince too. We were in Walter Reed together.”

  “You saw my boys in that… mine.” Sue Ann’s eyes welled with tears. “No one will tell me. Alex, did my babies suffer?”

  “No,” Alex said what she wanted to be true. “They did not suffer.”

  As if to nod, Sue Ann’s head moved.

  “Cee Cee told me if I didn’t make a ruckus, my babies would return to me.” Sue Ann’s eyes flicked to Alex. “And I believed him. I knew he was a liar. I caught him screwing another woman in our honeymoon suite. Liar, cheater, but I believed him.”

  Sue Ann lapsed into silence. Her eyes looked out into the sunny flower garden outside the window. Alex thought maybe she had gone to sleep when Sue Ann’s chest rose with a deep breath.

  “He was married to me the longest. Cee Cee and I were married for… almost eight years,” Sue Ann said. “I thought I’d go to hell if I divorced him. I was raised Southern Baptist.”

  Staring at the garden in front of her, Sue Ann fell silent. Alex startled when Sue Ann’s head jerked to look at her.

  “Now, I know I’ll go to hell for killing my babies.”

  “You didn’t kill them, Sue Ann.” Alex’s heart ached for the poor woman. “You were trying to save them.”

  “You’ve probably heard,” Sue Ann said.

  “Heard what?” Alex asked.

  “Cee Cee’s gone to court to eliminate my spousal support. No reason for spousal support or child support when the children are dead.” Sue Ann’s eyes flicked to Alex again. “I never cared about money. I wanted Cee Cee to love me. When we divorced, I never cared about the child support. After all, I had the boys. As long as we had food and shelter, I was happy. His lawyer has put my house on the market.”

  Alex’s face reflected the horror she felt in her heart. Sue Ann chuckled at Alex’s face.

  “You don’t want the wrinkles that face will give you,” Sue Ann said.

  Alex smiled.

  “I was going to die… join my boys… wither away,” Sue Ann said. “Then I realized you and I have so much in common. Krystal told me about going to Denver, eating cookies and meeting your friends. I figured if you could survive then I could survive.”

  Sue Ann’s chest filled with air at the effort of speaking.

  “Krystal offered me a place to stay until I’m on my feet. She says I can work for her. I was an accountant at Pecos Oil before I married Cee Cee. I’m good with numbers and everyone knows Krystal works too much. Plus...”

  Sue Ann’s eyes raked Alex’s face.

  “You need someone to help you get Cee Cee Joiner,” Sue Ann said. “As God is my witness, Alex, I’m going to take down Cee Cee Joiner.”

  “Sue Ann...”

  “I refuse to fill my heart with hatred. Daniel and David wouldn’t want me to hate. Danny used to say, ‘Don’t hate Mommy.’ I won’t hate. But I will work every single day to destroy Cee Cee Joiner.”

  “Sue Ann, you can’t let Cee Cee take all of your focus. You have to let life inside you. That’s how I survived. I felt like I owed it to the people who died to live well, really well, because they couldn’t.”

  Sue Ann’s head moved up and down slightly.

  “You’re very brave,” Sue Ann said. “I’ll remember that. Let life in. Right now, I need to let death out.”

  Sue Ann chuckled at her morbid joke.

  “Do you have kids, Alex?” Sue Ann asked.

  Alex shook her head. Tears dropped unnoticed from Sue Ann’s eyes.

  “Having Danny and Davy... I don’t think I’ve ever been happier. They were fun to be around,” Sue Ann said. “I miss them. A lot. But they lived well, my boys. I wanted proms and weddings and grandchildren. I worried they would do drugs or get someone pregnant. It never occurred to me that their father would kill them.”

  “It’s hard to make sense of what happens,” Alex said. “My friends were better, stronger, braver, lovelier people than I will ever be. They are gone and I am here. I understand how you feel.”

  “I couldn’t plan their funeral,” Sue Ann said. “Krystal took care of that.”

  Tears pooled Sue Ann’s sunken cheeks. Alex held a tissue box for her. Sue Ann startled as if she didn’t realize she was crying. She wiped her tears and blew her nose. Her gaze shifted to the flower garden.

  “I was lucky, Alex,” Sue Ann said. “I never realized how lucky I was. I regret every cross word, every punishment... If I had known...”

  Sue Ann sighed. Her eyes flicked to Alex.

  “I wouldn’t have done anything different.” Sue Ann’s lips turned up in a smile. “I’m going to make it, Alex. You’ll see.”

  Alex smiled. She looked up when a nurse came over to check on Sue Ann. While the nurse fussed over Sue Ann’s blanket, Alex pondered Sue Ann’s words. She remembered how hard the first days and weeks were after her friends were murdered. She’d wanted to die. She survived because people loved her. But at first, she survived for the people who loved her. Sue Ann Joiner needed something to live for.

  “You probably need to get on with your life,” Sue Ann said.

  “Sue Ann,” Alex said. “We don’t have any idea what Cee Cee Joiner is up to. Every road is blocked. Buffy has not cooperated with our investigation. Becki cooperated until Cory was well enough to leave the hospital. Her lawyers stepped in and she won’t speak with us.”

  Sue Ann’s face flushed.

  “Stupid.
They’re just happy their kids aren’t dead. They don’t realize Cee Cee will sell them out soon enough.”

  “I hope not,” Alex said.

  “He sold you out and you saved his life over and over again,” Sue Ann said.

  “How do you know that?” Alex asked.

  “He told me,” Sue Ann said. “He doesn’t think he does wrong, Alex. And I… I should have said something, done something… but...”

  “You were too dependent on him,” Alex said.

  Sue Ann nodded her head.

  “Did he tell you anything else?” Alex asked.

  Sue Ann shook her head.

  “Just that you got in his way. I thought he was threatening me… and he probably was... “

  Sue Ann fell silent. Her eyes welled with tears.

  “My boys never got in his way and they are dead. Alex, let me work for you. Buffy thinks I’m a pathetic joke. I can get her to trust me. I’ll find out what’s going on.”

  “It’s too dangerous,” Alex said.

  “I have nothing to lose,” Sue Ann said.

  “Do this for me,” Alex said. “Get well. Learn how to be an insurance agent. Then we’ll talk about Pecos Oil. That’s enough.”

  “I’ll do it. You’ll see, Alex.” Sue Ann nodded. “You’ll be really proud of me.”

  “I already am.” Alex smiled. “Listen, your boys loved you because you were worth loving. I know that’s cold comfort right now, but in time... You’ll see what I see.”

  “You can count on me, Alex.”

  Alex squeezed Sue Ann’s hand.

  “There is one thing...”

  “What?” Sue Ann’s face brightened at the idea that she could be useful.

  “Why does Cee Cee have so many children?” Alex asked. “We can’t find anyone who will answer that question.”

  “That’s because no one knows.” Sue Ann coughed a laugh.

  Alex nodded. Shifting, she moved to get up.

  “I know why he has so many children, Alex,” Sue Ann said. “I started at Pecos Oil in Cecil’s office. I was an assistant to his secretary while I finished college. When I graduated, Cecil found me a position in accounting. I worked my way up.”

  Alex sat back down. She watched Sue Ann’s face.

  “I see what you mean,” Sue Ann said. Nodding her head, she continued, “I can’t do this because I want to get back at Cee Cee. I have to do it because it’s the right thing to do. I’m going to tell you something that’s a secret.”

  Alex nodded her head. In that moment, Sue Ann became animated and impassioned. Alex saw a flicker of the woman she had been before her nightmare began.

  “Cee Cee doesn’t have any money in his own right,” Sue Ann said.

  “What?” Alex jerked with surprise.

  “Surprising, isn’t it?” Sue Ann smiled. “Pecos Oil was founded on an oil well on Cee Cee’s grandparent’s ranch. A lot of people think Cecil killed his in-laws, but I can’t imagine it. Cecil’s wife was the great love of his life. They had a true partnership in every sense of the word. They had trouble conceiving. That’s why they only had Cee Cee. She used to say it wasn’t for lack of trying.”

  Sue Ann smiled at the memory.

  “Cecil loves everything about the oil business and his wife loved the money. Cecil set up the business so he got what he loved, a business to play with, and she got what she loved, money. ”

  Alex settled in her chair. There was a story to be told, and she didn’t want to miss a single word.

  “Mrs. Cecil Joiner. That’s what she liked to be called. She was a grand old dame. And she did love money. She’d flow into the office wafting expensive perfume, flashing diamonds and furs,” Sue Ann chuckled. “I liked her. I can tell you, Cecil worshiped her.

  “Anyway, she died maybe sixteen years ago. For all her flash and airs, she was smart. Her will stipulated that Cecil inherit the business and profits from the business. Cee Cee was to work at Pecos Oil, draw a salary. Cee Cee was furious. He couldn’t live off an oil man’s salary.”

  Alex snorted.

  “Right. Mrs. Joiner’s will stipulated one other thing. Cee Cee would receive a million dollars for every child and two million for every boy. That’s per year. I think Mrs. Joiner thought he would use the money to support his children. She didn’t stipulate if the children were legitimate or illegitimate. Buffy had no intention of having children but for a cool two million a year... They had Tristan the next year.”

  “By killing his boys...”

  “Cee Cee lost six million dollars per year,” Sue Ann smiled. “That gives me great joy. Of course, Cee Cee will have more kids to replace the income. But for the next couple of years...”

  “How did it work? You had the child...”

  “Oh no, Cee Cee did a DNA test when I was pregnant. He wanted to ensure Danny was his child. He got his money as soon as the tests were turned into his mother’s estate. Krystal refused to do the DNA tests, so Cee Cee doesn’t get any money for her kids.”

  “I do like Krystal,” Alex said.

  “Me too,” Sue Ann said.

  “How did Mrs. Joiner die?” Alex asked.

  “I think Cee Cee killed her. But who knows? You should ask Cecil. I bet he’d tell you.”

  “I’m sorry, Sue Ann. Cecil is very ill with Alzheimer’s Disease.”

  Sue Ann’s eyes flashed. Her mouth stretched into a wide grin. In her stricken condition, she looked like a macabre Halloween pumpkin.

  “Cecil Joiner is not ill. He’s hiding out from Cee Cee. Did someone talk to Águeda?”

  “One of my team,” Alex said.

  “She was their housekeeper’s daughter. She’s like a daughter to Cecil.”

  “Cecil Joiner still runs Pecos Oil?”

  “You’d have to kill him to get him not to,” Sue Ann said. “See, Alex, I can be very helpful.”

  Having used up all of her energy telling the story, Sue Ann collapsed into herself. Alex signaled the nurse. Rushing forward, the nurse pushed Sue Ann’s wheelchair to her room. Alex, Vince and Krystal followed behind. They were almost to Sue Ann’s room when Sue Ann reached for Alex’s hand again.

  “When I’m better, we’ll go see Cecil together,” she said.

  “I’d like that, Sue Ann,” Alex said. “Would you mind one more question?”

  “Anything,” Sue Ann said.

  “Is this Águeda?” Alex gave Sue Ann the photo of Cecil Joiner and his nurse.

  “Yes,” Sue Ann said. “That’s her.”

  Alex pointed to the young woman. “That’s Águeda?”

  “Oh no, I don’t know who that is,” Sue Ann said. She pointed to the woman Ben identified as the cook. “That’s Águeda.”

  Alex pointed to the cook.

  “That’s Águeda? You’re sure.” Alex pointed to the bent, haggard cook.

  “Of course Alex. I knew her as a young woman. She’s aged horribly but I’d know her anywhere. Why?”

  “Oh nothing,” Alex smiled. “You’ve really helped.”

  Sue Ann smiled at Alex. The nurse closed Sue Ann’s door on them. Alex, Vince and Krystal walked to the front of the nursing home together.

  “Do you really need Sue Ann’s help?” Alex asked.

  “I need help,” Krystal said. “I knew Sue Ann before she met Cee Cee. She was the controller of a division at Pecos Oil. She’s smart, just not very smart about men. But then who am I to talk?”

  “I thought your luck was changing,” Alex said.

  Krystal gave Alex a dreamy smile.

  “How is Sue Ann able to afford…”

  “Don’t worry, Alex. Her insurance covers everything. She’s got quite a road in front of her.”

  “I’m betting on her,” Alex said.

  “Me too,” Krystal said.

  Alex hugged Krystal good-bye then she and Vince made their way across the parking lot to the rental car. Leaning against the fabric seat, Alex closed her eyes in a silent prayer for Sue Ann.

  She would never underst
and what made Cee Cee Joiner tick. Clearly, he thought selling Sue Ann’s house and removing her financial support would send her over the edge. One thing was true, Cee Cee Joiner underestimated Sue Ann.

  “You Ok?” Vince asked.

  “Sad,” Alex said.

  Vince nodded. Turning on the car, he began driving back toward the airport.

  “Ok, what are the three biggest lies in Texas?” Vince asked.

  “Lies?”

  “I’ll tell you.”

  “Is this a joke?” Alex asked.

  “Yes, it’s a joke. The three biggest lies in Texas are...” Vince turned onto the highway. “I won this belt buckle in a rodeo.”

  “That’s a big buckle, mister.” Alex smiled.

  “Exactly. The second biggest lie is: ‘This truck is paid for.’”

  “That’s a big truck…” Alex started.

  “Mister,” They said in unison. They laughed.

  “And the final biggest lie is: ‘I was trying to push this heifer over the fence.’”

  Alex made a puzzled face.

  “You know, push the heifer.”

  “I don’t get it,” Alex said.

  Vince laughed at Alex’s deadpan face. He drove to the airport and checked them in on their commercial flight. They chatted about the wedding through the line at McDonald’s. Alex was halfway through her Big Mac when she exclaimed.

  “OH, push the heifer! You mean...” Alex made a gesture and Vince nodded. “That’s funny.”

  Vince joined her laughter.

  F

  CHAPTER FORTY-seven

  Three weeks later

  Thursday night

  May 15 – 9:30 P.M. MDT

  Near the Gulf of Mexico

  “You remember, we have the DEA car auction tomorrow night,” Raz said into Alex’s ear bud communicator. “Drug dealers have the best vehicles. And we own no vehicles.”

  “We own my CJ,” Alex said.

  “A thirty-year-old Jeep doesn’t count as a vehicle,” Raz said.

  “You realize it’s in Barstow,” Matthew said.

  “We’ll be there in time, right?” Raz asked.

  “You know, usually you let me sleep in the helicopter!” She laughed.

  “It’s not my fault. I’m not there,” Raz said. “You’d get your beauty rest if you’d let me come.”