Falling For The Villain

by Robinson, M.

  I was exhausted from trying to be what he wanted.

  Play his doll whenever he demanded it.

  The realization was a rude awakening in my alternative state. I went from being scared to euphoric. It made my vision blur, and my eyes shut tight. I couldn’t get my legs to move. It was like I was permanently glued to that submissive position on the floor in front of him.

  My emotions were all over the place.

  My brain was hyperaware of everything.

  My body felt strong yet weak.

  I thought he carried me over to the bed and laid me in his arms until I saw nothing but darkness again.

  Although, I swear…

  I heard him talk to me.

  Then say my name as he ran his fingers through my brushed hair, sharing, “You’ll never be her…”

  Donovan

  While she slept in my arms, I thought about my life.

  “Nothing is the way it’s supposed to be, Juliet.”

  She didn’t stir, she didn’t awake, so I kept going.

  “I wish things could have been different. For you. For me. For us.”

  I sat there, thinking about all the things I couldn’t change. Even if I wanted to, even if I tried— it wouldn’t matter. I would still be this man who was a monster.

  A villain.

  Her captor.

  Exactly what that horrible bastard of a father made me. It was like he knew even then how to groom me into an exact replica so that when I looked at myself in the mirror, I didn’t see me anymore. I only saw him and my mother’s bloodied body.

  I felt myself crawling on my hands and knees and then craving the need to default to what he deemed comfortable, normal. And now I was trapped, in a prison of my own making.

  In a gilded cage.

  A castle nobody was allowed to visit, with all the pretty things placed upon the shelves and at my service, but nobody to share them with, nobody to truly talk to because vulnerability only brought you death.

  I knew that now.

  Maybe I knew that then?

  “I wasn’t always like this, you know? You wouldn’t leave my mind. I had to know who you are, were, what I could do to you because of what you did to me… It wasn’t your fault. But we always pay for our parents’ mistakes, right? Isn’t that the way it goes?”

  My hands shook as I thought back on her brushing her hair with that specific brush, and I couldn’t exorcise the vision of my mother sitting on the bed and watching her soothing movements as she brushed her hair and told me in her own way that everything would one day be all right.

  It was the hope that landed the final blow.

  Not my father.

  This unbearable weight was on my chest from the lies, secrets, and betrayal. The tightening in my throat and chest made it almost impossible to breathe; I was asphyxiating in it. I couldn’t tell the lies from the truth anymore. I groaned in pain, leaning against the headboard of her bed.

  I could let her go and let this be the end of it all. She was mine. I owned her.

  My possession to have and hold.

  There was no going back for me, only a standstill.

  Love, hurt, pain.

  Hate.

  It was all a tangled web.

  I didn’t know the difference any more than Juliet did. I wouldn’t let her get the best of me, change who I was born to be. I had to continue on, with or without her consent.

  This was only the beginning.

  The ending was near…

  There was so much I wanted to say, needed to tell her; however, I couldn’t form the words to explain to her why I was this villain. I had to get away from her. I was spending too much time in this room, with her in my arms. She shouldn’t be sleeping on my chest, in my presence. This wasn’t part of the process of making her my slave. It was the exact opposite. I was breaking all my own rules, and I couldn’t help it for the life of me.

  I craved her in a way I’d never yearned for anyone. Especially a woman, a pet, a slave. Although, there was no holding back on hearing her scream my name.

  “Donovan!”

  I wanted to break her, only to piece her together again. She was an obstacle that I wouldn’t lose. I’d have her at my mercy, in my bed, with blood on my hands. I watched her for as long as I could remember, since that first concert I’d seen her when she was eighteen years old, and I was twenty-four. I waited on bated breath for her to be in my embrace. As much as I thought she was just going to be another pet, another beautiful thing I had in my possession, in the back of my mind, I always knew the truth. She belonged to me, and I belonged to her.

  Mine.

  Always and forever.

  Mine.

  There was something about her and not just what I knew, saw, and wanted. She had always been different, making a hard man like me go weak. I wasn’t supposed to fall for her, it wasn’t part of my plan, but I couldn’t stop myself.

  I needed her.

  Longed for her before she was ever in my arms.

  There was no going back for me, only going forward with her by my side. Kissing her forehead, I let her go. Leaving her alone in her room, I remembered what it felt like to always be alone after my mother was killed. It was what he wanted, me weak and at his brutal mercy.

  He’d taught me everything I know, making me hate who I’d turned into. There was no stopping what I’d become. I embraced it a long time ago. From the moment my father let me out of that closet, I was his to do what he pleased like I was with Juliet.

  It was survival.

  With a shaky hand, I grabbed my cell phone out of the pocket of my slacks and leaned against the door to her bedroom. Needing the support to hold me up for what I was about to do.

  To say.

  The phone rang only once when he answered.

  I didn’t allow Troy to respond.

  Simply stating, “She’s ready. Let the auction begin tonight.”

  Fully aware I was only doing this to prove to myself that I didn’t love her, knowing in my dark heart that I was born loving her.

  CHAPTER THIRTEEN

  Juliet

  “It’s time.”

  A feminine voice brought me out of my restless sleep. She was wearing a gorgeous white tuxedo set and had diamond-studded glasses perched on the edge of her nose. She looked anywhere between fifty and sixty with her dark hair tucked back into a tight bun, her red lipstick spread across full lips that I couldn’t tell if were natural or not.

  Her hands were on her hips as she assessed me. “Well? Aren’t you going to get up?”

  “Who are you?” I asked in a sleep-filled voice.

  Her eyes narrowed. “I’m your fairy godmother.”

  “What?”

  “What, no laughter?” She sighed like she was disappointed. “Guess you really are ready if I’m no longer funny.” She turned and said, “I brought two gowns for you to pick from. He’s clearly an indulgent master if he’s allowing you the choice and not demanding which one to pick. Oh well, maybe it’s a test. Choose wisely before I do your makeup and hair, all right?”

  She pointed to two floor-length ball gowns. One was a sleek white silk with a fully open back and front. The only lick of fabric on the top would barely cover my breasts and was attached to the slinky skirt. Other than that, I’d need to be careful when I even walked in it.

  The other was gold.

  For some reason, it spoke to me more. It was simpler, nearly see-through on top except for a few strategically placed sewed-in pieces of golden lace on the strapless top. The rest of the skirt was identical to the white dress, slinky, long, and with a high slit on each side.

  “Is there a dinner or something?” I asked, trying to figure out where he’d take me and who would be looking at me.

  She snorted out a laugh. “Leave it to Donovan to not even prepare you for your debut, right?” Her tall silver heels clicked against the floor. “Let’s just say you’re going to a party. There, that sounds better.”

  I quickly pointed
to the gold dress. “I like this one.”

  “Then let’s get it on you,” she exclaimed cheerfully as she grabbed the dress from the hanger and slowly unzipped the back. I was already naked, so there was no stripping out of anything as I gently stepped inside the dress, holding it to my chest as she zipped it up.

  “Perfect fit. Shocker.” She sighed more to herself than to me as she gently pushed me toward the bathroom, where she had a special light you’d use for Instagram photos set up along with a bounty of makeup and hair products.

  I could almost believe I was getting ready for a special event.

  While she did my makeup and hair, her hands were gentle as she worked, whistling a tune I didn’t recognize half the time. I let myself believe I was Julia Roberts and he was Richard Gere.

  He was going to wine and dine me.

  I’d still be his pet.

  But now, we’d somehow be equals.

  I’d passed all his tests.

  Maybe this was my reward?

  “Elaina,” Donovan said her name softly, softer than he’d ever said mine, softer than he’d ever spoken to me.

  Jealousy at his treatment of her coursed through me as he walked into the room looking like The Phantom of the Opera come to fucking life.

  He had an all-black suit on, no color was present, his black silk tie was pinned with a diamond, and he wore a simple black half-mask on his face.

  I’d never seen anyone look so handsome in all my life.

  And I’d never hated him more.

  More than when he shamed me.

  More than when he hurt me.

  More than when he made me bleed.

  I hated him the most when he said her name.

  His dark eyes landed on me, and a small smile curved across his full hateful lips as he put his hands gently on Elaina’s shoulders and squeezed.

  “As always, you did beautifully. How would I survive without you?”

  Lowering his head, eyes still on me while Elaina shot me a wink, he kissed her neck, his mouth lingering near her skin.

  She froze like she was caught in his web.

  He was the spider.

  She was the fly.

  I was the witness.

  Tears of anger burned in my eyes.

  Elaina cleared her throat and stepped forward, then turned to face him. “I’ll see you tonight, Donovan.”

  Bile rose in my throat, imagining every possible scenario that would eventually break my spirit, my heart, my soul.

  I was still sitting like a good pet when she left the room. Donovan eyed me up and down, so callous and calculating that I didn’t even want to imagine all the ways he would make me pay if I chose the wrong dress or addressed him the wrong way.

  “You chose the gold,” he addressed in a harsh whisper. “I must have trained you well if that’s where your eyes fell to … considering…” He reached into his pocket and pulled out a large Tiffany’s box.

  I gaped and gasped. Shaking, I reached for it. “T-thank you, Master.”

  “Ah, she sees a jewelry box, and now she gets it right.”

  Was he … teasing me?

  It was almost too much. The emotions welled up inside me and threatened to spill over. Adrenaline surged as I slowly opened the box and quickly frowned. It was solid gold and had his name carved inside it along with the phrase. “Mine to take, mine to break. The Society.”

  He reached for the necklace and held it up. There was some sort of chain attached to it that dangled nearly to the floor and, at the end of it, some sort of handle.

  “Turn,” he whispered.

  I stood and turned around, confused and honored he’d give me something, so… Wait a second… As he clasped it around my throat, everything made sense with stunning clarity.

  I was his pet.

  Oh God.

  I was his pet. I couldn’t cry, or he’d punish me and make me bleed. But I was his pet, and this was my collar, and that was his leash. I shattered in that moment, I wasn’t sure if it was the last remaining piece of my heart that hoped for something better, maybe even to be rescued by the very man who punished me, but it left.

  And I realized he didn’t have to beat me into submission. No, he would lead me there with his own hands.

  Donovan

  I lived for her jealousy, for the way she stared at Elaina like she was going to murder her for gaining my approval.

  It meant one thing.

  She. Was. Ready.

  The limo ride was painfully tense as Juliet gently touched the collar on her neck. I wondered if she was horrified or excited? Which would she be, and while I wanted to ask her, I already assumed the answer.

  She was, of course, both.

  Which made her even angrier.

  Juliet liked this role of submissiveness, exactly how I liked the control, the ownership of something so precious, so beautiful, like a rare gem that nobody ever truly deserved but everyone would kill to acquire.

  The limo arrived just on time, and I handed her the mask that would match her dress, the one I’d already picked out, and gently attached it to her face. It covered most of it, except her mouth and obviously her eyes, showing every man in attendance that only I could look upon her, however, driving them fucking crazy that they’d never get to see all of her.

  Now she was owned.

  By me.

  A shudder ran through her as the door opened. I was introducing her to the Kingdom I owned, the one I operated, carefully calculated, and inherited from my father. I was showing her behind the curtain, and once she saw it all…

  There would truly never be any going back, and I wondered if she knew that, walking into the large ballroom at the estate I’d purchased only for these events. I wondered if she shook with lust, fear, or all of the above. And I hoped, I perversely hoped it was both.

  Music swirled around the ballroom, masters danced with their wives while their pets watched and vice versa. The ones being punished were put in a corner. The pets were forced to watch their masters enjoy an evening with their wives, and it killed them to see a smile on their owners’ faces while the wives gave them pleasure only the pets could truly give.

  There were politicians.

  Actors.

  Musicians.

  There were people of influence and power who no longer knew or understood their own need for dominance until my company offered it to them—for a price.

  If I was going to hell, I might as well get rich on my way there.

  I gave them life.

  And I was in control of it all.

  Me and Troy.

  Though Troy was starting to worry me, the way he looked at me, the way he saw through even what I refused to understand or process. He’d always been a shrewd businessman, but now he was something else entirely.

  Troy was jealous.

  And jealousy was a game we never truly played with one another until now.

  I watched his face contort into something sinister while I led my pet, her chain wrapped around my wrist as we went to our table, with our expensive wine, our steak, our company for the evening.

  “New one.” A man whose name I couldn’t remember nor would I, added, “She’s pretty.”

  “She is,” I agreed. Wrapping the gold chain harder around my fist, I jerked her closer to me and jutted my chin toward the ground by my feet.

  She didn’t have to be told. Instantly she sat on the floor and bowed her head, waiting for my next command.

  I beamed, leaning down toward her ear. “You’re such a good girl,” I whispered, making her hide back a smile.

  “Pity,” Troy stated with his pet at his feet. “That you took her before any one of us could even offer.”

  Pity my ass.

  “Yes,” I agreed again. “Isn’t it, though?”

  “Where’d you find her again?” Troy baited me, but I was too smart for him. He was just like my father, always trying to stay one step ahead, and now I knew better.

  I would always force him to be one
step behind me.

  He knew who she was, and pretending he didn’t only pissed me off.

  “Does it matter?” I shrugged.

  Troy laughed, taking a sip of his whiskey. “How about a test, then?”

  I wanted to hurt him.

  Hard.

  Slow.

  “You and your tests and theories. What do you need proven? She’s mine. I own her, and I can do whatever I want with her.”

  “Let me borrow her then.”

  I grit my teeth, and his blue eyes seemed to darken, looking around at the powerful people sitting next to us. Investors, people who could attempt to destroy what I’d built.

  “What for?”

  “Since when do you deny me one of your pets, Donovan? I thought we shared everything? I mean, unless she’s different.”

  He was testing my patience and my restraint. If I didn’t let him have her, he would know how much she truly meant to me, which would only put her in danger when it came to him.

  I had no choice but to respond with, “Fine. You don’t fuck her, understood?”

  “Oh wow, Donovan, so crass. Of course, I just want to see what she can do with her precious hands and maybe, just maybe … how bright her blood is when I make her bleed for me.”

  Her eyes widened, hearing him announce his last remark.

  Anywhere I went, I always had the attention of the room, especially at my events. All eyes landed on Juliet, and the room grew quiet almost immediately, waiting for my next command.

  I knew right then and there, this was what Troy wanted. To catch me stumbling when it came to her. He still didn’t know who he was fucking with. If he wanted a show, I’d give him an Academy Award performance. You could feel the tension in the ballroom amidst the music, people staring in fascination at Juliet.

  With its slits up her thighs, nearly exposing every perfect inch of her.

  With her pretty makeup shining for all to see.

  Her perfect nails glowing in the candlelight.

  Her mask was arranged to hide what I didn’t want others to see.

  I nearly growled when Troy smiled at her like she was his to smile at. By the time I composed myself, her eyes filled with fuming tears, and I wanted to lean over and lick them as they fell, tell her that in every fantasy I had, it involved those tears of outrage, the blood, the pain.