Falling For The Villain

by Robinson, M.

  Quickly, I looked toward Juliet while her father was undoing the ropes on her wrists before helping her off the X. She stumbled on her feet, strangling a cry as she ran past me, directly into Romeo’s arms and then her father’s.

  In the end, the good guys won, and the bad guys didn’t.

  One of us was on the ground, in a pool of his own blood, while the other had just watched his everything run past him and into her real hero’s arms—her brother, her father—her family.

  “I missed you so much, sweetheart.” Romeo kissed her forehead.

  “We need to get you looked at.” Her father cupped her chin tenderly.

  Not aggressively.

  There was no fear in their touch, despite the fact that they were trained killers; there was only care, love, security, warmth.

  The only thing I could compare it to was the way I had begun to feel when Juliet looked at me, when she touched me, and the way my mother’s music used to wrap itself around me, setting me free.

  Setting. Me. Free.

  “It’s finished.” I found myself saying, my voice cracked. I might as well have crashed against the floor like Troy.

  I knew I was different than him.

  But it didn’t change the fact that I’d stolen her away from them.

  Kept her for myself.

  Hurt her for my pleasure.

  Only to leave her behind.

  “Take her home,” I added, nodding at them to do as I demanded.

  Needed.

  Wanted.

  Despite feeling like I was going to die.

  Romeo froze; his expression went from shocked to grave as Juliet collapsed against him, bursting into tears.

  “Donovan?”

  I couldn’t look at her. “It’s what’s best. Take her.”

  “But … I don’t understand.” Tears streamed with blood down her face, mixing with our tainted love story and tragic end. “You’re my home, Donovan—Master—”

  I flinched when she fell to her bloody knees and wrapped her arms around my legs.

  “Pet.” It came out harsher than I would have liked. Harder. “It’s time.”

  “You promised!” she screamed. “You swore I was yours forever! You said it, Donovan, you said it!”

  My pained expression met Romeo’s, looking at him to do what I couldn’t.

  Comfort her.

  Love her.

  Make her feel safe.

  In that one moment, I was just a man looking at another man, and we saw eye to eye—keep her protected, get her healed.

  I needed to stop being the reason her heart was breaking.

  Even though she wouldn’t realize it in that instant.

  I needed to set her free.

  Romeo picked her up off the floor, and she clawed at his body to get away from him, to get to me. Memories rushed through me of the first time she’d reacted the same way she was right now, when she woke up tied to a piano. However, I was hard as fuck for her back then; now, I was just hardened.

  A solitary tear slid down my cheek and onto the floor.

  Juliet saw it, but I didn’t budge.

  I closed my eyes and mourned the only way I knew how.

  By imagining all those times I asked her to play, and all the times she mended a broken man with her smile.

  “Goodbye, Juliet,” I affirmed to only her.

  “You said you weren’t a liar! That you would always tell me the truth! I know you love me, Donovan! I can feel it!”

  I didn’t say a word.

  “Tell me you don’t love me! I deserve at least that! If you want to set me free, then scream to me that you don’t love me!”

  Instead of giving her what she begged for, I spun and left her there.

  Breaking.

  Bleeding.

  Dying for me.

  I wondered if she heard my scream minutes later as I collapsed to the ground and tugged at my hair, trying to tear it out of my scalp. I wondered if she realized how many times I stared at the knife in Troy’s chest and pondered if it would feel better to just end my story there.

  One blade to the heart.

  One bullet to the head.

  It would be so easy to take my own life, but death was far too good for a villain like me.

  An hour later, Elaina walked in, a bottle of Jack in hand. “Thank you.”

  “For what?” My voice was hoarse from screaming, and it hurt to talk. “Making him finally pay.”

  She walked over and kicked his body. “The Sinacores are sending a cleanup crew.”

  “Good for them.”

  “Where is she?”

  I stared into the amber liquid. “Home.”

  Elaina wisely said nothing as I opened the bottle and tipped it back, waiting for the rest of the men to arrive.

  With nothing but my dark, seedy world crumbling down on me.

  Juliet

  Could the world hear my heart break? Could Donovan? Why would he? Why? Why take me only to give me back?

  I couldn’t even feel the physical pain anymore, the trauma, the bruising. Mentally, I couldn’t even focus on the shame or fear. All I had was loss.

  Loss of him.

  Not my master.

  Donovan.

  My love.

  “It’s best this way,” Romeo declared once we were back at the house, once the doctor had made sure I was okay and treated all of my wounds.

  He sent me away.

  Master gave me up without fighting for me first. He surrendered like I was nothing more than a toy he no longer wanted to play with.

  “Juliet,” Romeo barked my name this time. “Did you hear what I said?”

  “Does it even matter anymore?” I stared down at my phone. The tears wouldn’t stop, and it was like my body was made to create only tears at this point. Until I drowned in a river of them, my head sinking below water with one last thought—him.

  Romeo sighed. “He’s not normal, Juliet. He did the right thing; he came to us, and—”

  “You don’t know him the way I do,” I snapped. “You don’t know what he’s been through, how he saved me.”

  “He fucking kidnapped you!” Romeo yelled, his fists clenched at his sides. “How do you not see that?”

  “I see it.” I finally looked up. “I know he had other reasons. I’m not stupid, Romeo, but things changed; they shifted. He was … mine.”

  He shook his head. “Look, maybe you should talk to someone.”

  I snorted out a laugh. “Oh good, you get back to me after you confess all your sins first; sound good? How many women did you kill after you fucked—”

  “Enough,” he growled. “Don’t make this about me when we both know this is about you. Look … we just got you back, and I don’t want to fight for you anymore.”

  “Then leave,” I whispered. “Just go.”

  “Juliet—”

  “Please.” I was close to begging. “Please, just go.”

  Finally, he got up, his breathing loud. “The house is heavily guarded, especially now. All you have to do is text or approach one of the men if you need anything.”

  “Everyone has their version of prison,” I announced more to myself than him. “They all look different, and weirdly enough, it all feels the same.”

  “What?” He frowned.

  “He didn’t set me free.” I shook my head, then clutched my phone in my hand. “He just handed me over to the jailer—again.”

  Romeo said nothing.

  He left the room.

  I started texting Donovan with the phone he’d given me.

  Me: I need to talk to you.

  Nothing.

  It said delivered but not read.

  Me: I miss you. Please … please.

  Nothing.

  Done.

  Over.

  My villain was gone, never to return again.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

  Juliet

  Six weeks later

  I texted him like I always did.

  Whi
le it said delivered, I knew he wasn’t reading them.

  I guess it didn’t matter anyway. Somehow it had turned into my own personal therapy—texting him, filling him in on the mundane details of my normal life, one I no longer wanted if he wasn’t in it.

  My stomach clenched yet again.

  With a curse, I rushed toward the toilet and puked up my entire breakfast. At first, I thought it was heartache, and then the flu, and now… well, now I thought about all the times we’d had sex.

  All the places.

  All the instances when we didn’t use protection.

  He was mine.

  I was his.

  We wanted nothing between us, condom included.

  I knew my mom was concerned every time I rushed away from the dinner table or locked myself up in my room, crying.

  The hardest part wasn’t keeping food in.

  It was keeping the tears from falling.

  Me: I haven’t been feeling well.

  Me: Please answer me.

  Me: I love you.

  Delivered.

  Delivered.

  Delivered.

  I threw the phone against the bed and laid back, staring up at the ceiling, not even realizing I was touching the front of my stomach, wishing, praying I had some small part of him.

  No one talked about what I’d been through, and they didn’t have to ask. They witnessed it every day, from the way I carried myself to the way I talked and poured my eyes out during the day and night.

  They knew I missed him with every fiber of my being. I thought a huge part of my family didn’t know how to take me. How to understand me, so it was better not knowing. I didn’t want to tell them. It was none of their business. I was an adult. A woman. Despite Donovan returning me as if I were nothing more than a child he was babysitting.

  I wanted to hate him.

  Hit him.

  Fight for him.

  It was a war I’d lose.

  He had turned his back on me when I needed him the most. It was what killed my heart in the end.

  I sighed, thinking about all the ways he called me “Pet.”

  With anger.

  With love.

  I couldn’t hate him if I tried, and trust me, I fucking tried.

  My therapist said it was Stockholm Syndrome that I was experiencing. I told her to eat shit and stopped going to her the very next day. I didn’t need anyone to tell me what I was going through. They didn’t know one damn thing about Donovan and what he’d been through. What he had to endure at the hands of monsters who turned him into his worst nightmare.

  “The heart wants what it wants…” Mom whispered as the bed dipped, placing a small box on top of my stomach. “I think you know what to do with this.”

  Hot tears burned the back of my eyes while I sat up and grabbed the small pregnancy test. “Is it wrong to hope that I am?”

  Her eyes crinkled at the sides. “No. I guess you could say I know what it’s like to hope for a little girl, to pray every night, and then realize that I won’t ever have her. And then one day, your dad confessed something to me, something that you would think would tear a marriage apart.”

  “He cheated,” I answered for her.

  She looked away, and her blue eyes focused on the wall. “You know, I think back then I was just so glad he was honest with me right away, and I was able to forgive him, able to look him in the eyes as he owned up to his mistake and say, what do you want? Because at the end of the day, I still loved him, despite how he’d hurt me, but you don’t keep someone because you don’t want anyone else to have them. You keep them because you love them more than you love yourself. Love is confusing. It’s the most precious gift in the world. I wasn’t going to lose the man I loved for a meaningless night that he shared with your biological mother.”

  My throat ached. “So what happened?”

  “It was hard.” Mom smiled, reaching for my hand. “It was hell, actually, but we fought for each other, and when… when we found out that you were the result of something that could have broken us, we realized that when you forgive, sometimes you’re given a gift. You were that gift, Juliet. From the very first day I held you, I knew that you were mine.”

  My tears seared, sliding down my cheeks. “What was she like?”

  “She was beautiful.” She placed a piece of hair behind my ears. “She was kind. She was selfless. She loved you very much. It was the hardest thing for her to do. To give you up. Hand you over to us.”

  I didn’t know what to say, staying quiet instead.

  “The day we found out she was murdered… It tore your father apart. He wanted to save her. We all did. For you. For Donovan.”

  “Did you know Donovan before she was killed?”

  “He was a sweet boy. Gentle. Nurturing. Life has a way of making choices for you, Juliet. His fate was established the moment he was born.”

  “Do you think he’s a villain? A monster? A sociopath?”

  “Sweetheart, I’m married to your father, and with that comes every demon known to man. This life isn’t easy, and it’s not made for the weak. Your brother is just as ruthless as…” She hesitated for a second.

  “As Donovan?”

  “We all have a bad and good side. It’s what makes us human.”

  I looked down at the scars on my legs from Troy. They would heal, and eventually, physically, I would be all right; emotionally, I didn’t want them to disappear. They were a reminder of what happened when the devil prevailed. They were also a reminder of what I’d felt, seen, lived through.

  It all led back to Donovan. He didn’t inflict these scars; however, they made me remember that he saved my life, proving to be my hero after all.

  “I love you, Mom.”

  “I know you do, sweetie!” Mom laughed sadly. “And I love you. It’s why I can’t let you sit here anymore in your room. It’s why I told Romeo and your father that this time I was taking charge. They’re both silently pouting in the living room, by the way. We’ll see how much whiskey we have left after they watch you leave.”

  My head jerked up. “Are we going on vacation?”

  “No.” She got up and went toward my closet, and pulled out a bag. “For now, pack a few light things; you’ll need new clothes soon. Make sure to take your charger, and don’t forget your laptop; though, I’m sure he could afford a new one. That man is richer than two of our families combined.” She chuckled. “I’ll miss you. Please visit often, call, and don’t forget to let us know about the baby. Take the test, and confirm my suspicions.” She cupped my cheeks. “You’re pregnant … your love made a baby.”

  “I want the baby so bad, I want—” I broke down into hard sobs. “What if he doesn’t want me, though? What if he turns me away?”

  “What if he does?” Mom asked. “Then what?”

  “Then…” I sobbed. “My life is over.”

  “No.” She clung to my hand and pressed both of our palms against my stomach. “No matter what he says, your life has just begun. The only question is—are you brave enough to fight for it? Your child needs a father, and I have full faith your captor will be your savior. For both of you.”

  “You don’t think I’m weak for loving him and wanting to go back to his life?”

  “Weakness is just another form of strength. You were never his hostage, Juliet. If you were, I know with certainty that you wouldn’t love and want to go back to him.”

  “Do you forgive him?”

  “I don’t need to. You do. This is your life, and you only get one chance to live it how you please. I chose my demons the day I said, ‘I do.’ Now it’s your turn to choose yours.”

  “Did you forgive Daddy? For me?”

  She smiled a huge loving expression. “Of course. Even if we could go back and change things, I wouldn’t. His mistake conceived you, and I wouldn’t take that back for anything.”

  I touched my belly.

  Thinking about all the possibilities.

  Could I do this?

>   I stood up and walked toward the bathroom. The moment of truth wasn’t when I realized I loved him.

  No.

  It was when I learned that I was pregnant.

  Donovan

  I was sitting on the bench of my mother’s piano, playing Ludovico Einaudi’s “I Giorni” for what felt like the hundredth fucking time. For the last seven weeks, this was what I did with my spare moments. I’d sit here and play this tune until my fingers felt as if they were bleeding.

  Not for my mother like I did in the past.

  No, it was for my pet.

  Juliet.

  I mourned the loss of her like she had died, and in every way possible, it felt like that to me. She did die. I couldn’t see her face except in my memories. I couldn’t hear her voice unless I was dreaming. I couldn’t feel her skin against my fingers, taste her body along my tongue unless I was imagining her as I fucked my fist to the images of all the above.

  It was such a lovely melody, and at one time, it brought me peace. Now it was nothing more than agony. I wanted to feel the pain, the turmoil, the devastation of losing her and losing myself in the process. Because that meant it happened, that meant we existed in one space, in one time, together, and numbing myself wasn’t an option.

  Every inch of me longed for her in a way I’d never yearned for anyone. She was in my blood, circulating through my veins, trying to breathe life back into whatever was left of me. Her blood was on my hands, her fears, her tears, her love, I owned all that too.

  I got lost in the rhythm of the keys, simply fantasizing she was there playing for me, sitting next to me, smiling, putting her hands over mine like I used to do her.

  Sometimes it felt as though this was the way I’d live for the rest of my life. In a tower filled with money, power, control, and sex, the seven deadly sins and I were cemented for eternity. Juliet brought so much light to this estate with her smile, her laugh, her innocence. I stole all that from her, and there was no way in hell I was ever giving it back. If I couldn’t have her by my side, then I’d have her spirit, her heart; it all belonged to me as well.