‘Bricks...?’ When Raina turned, Gabriel’s eyes were shining. Sitting down on the sofa, he ran his finger across the top of the box. ‘Bricks are my favourite. Would you show me, Anya?’
His enthusiasm was so infectious Anya let go of Raina’s hand, running across to the box of bricks and opening it. Gabriel grinned, craning over to see inside, and Raina breathed a sigh of relief as Anya began to empty the box, showing Gabriel the bricks.
‘These are fantastic.’ He addressed his comment to no one in particular and then smiled at Raina. ‘I’ll be a father soon.’
Maya chuckled, rolling her eyes. ‘Is there anyone in London you haven’t managed to tell yet, Gabriel?’
‘No. Probably not.’ Gabriel was busy sorting out the bricks. ‘Where do you get these?’
‘You go to the shop and buy them.’ Anya’s tone implied that this was the kind of information that anyone should know.
‘Do you? Which shop?’
Anya shrugged and Raina supplied the answer. ‘You’ll find these in any toy shop. You won’t be needing them for a while, though. Congratulations.’ It was nice to see a man so happy at the prospect of becoming a father.
‘Thank you. We went for the three-month scan yesterday, and my wife’s given me the all-clear to share the news. It was a complete surprise.’
A lump settled in Raina’s throat. Her pregnancy had been a complete surprise too, but it would have been difficult to imagine Alistair making enquiries about building bricks, and unable to stop himself from telling everyone he met.
She’d never forgotten her lost child, but right now she had to think about Anya. Maya waved her to a seat, pouring the coffee. ‘We’ll go through the questions, shall we? While Anya’s keeping Gabriel amused.’
Maya’s questions were searching, but her gentle tone and her smile made them feel less challenging. Before long, they were simply talking, and Raina felt herself relax.
‘She manages very well...’ Gabriel’s occasional murmured interjections were all very much to the point. He was obviously listening, even if it seemed that his attention was solely focussed on Anya.
‘Yes, she does. But as a doctor, I know that many people with limb differences suffer from overuse issues in the long term. And I want to give her as many choices as I can.’
‘What choices?’ Maya asked.
‘I don’t know. She’ll tell me what she wants to do, when she wants to do it. I just want to be able to respond to that. If it takes time and money to make custom prosthetics, then that doesn’t allow her to try things out, the way that most children can.’
‘Good point.’ Gabriel flashed Raina a smile, and then went back to the structure that he and Anya had built.
* * *
Alistair had been at a loss all morning. He’d decided that he should make himself scarce during Raina and Anya’s interview, and had gone upstairs to spend some time with the development team for the prosthetics project. But he’d struggled to hear everything that was said and keep up with the exchange of ideas. He’d ended up sitting in the corner, drinking coffee and thinking about Raina.
If Gabriel and Maya decided that another child was a better fit for the project, then this would be his last chance to see her. She’d disappear again, a face in the crowd that he’d looked for time and time again, and never found. He’d often thought of her, the mental picture including the child that she’d always wanted, and this might be his only opportunity to see that reality.
It would take a little planning if he was to bump into her on her way out. Hanging around in Reception bore no fruit, so he decided that he might return to his office, where he was sure to at least catch a glimpse of Raina and Anya when they left. As he walked towards it, he saw the door of Gabriel’s office open, and the beat of his heart started suddenly to thunder in his ears.
Then he saw Raina, joining Maya in the doorway. She was dressed in a pair of dark slacks with a cream blouse, the perfect choice for an informal interview. She looked stunning. A little girl in a blue and white summer dress ran to her side and Gabriel appeared, shaking Raina’s hand and then looking down as the child tugged at his sleeve.
Alistair held his breath, unable to move. Gabriel bent towards the child, and she planted a kiss on his cheek. Maya laughed, obviously making a joke of it, and Gabriel stood up again, grinning helplessly. Fierce jealousy wound its fingers around Alistair’s heart and squeezed hard. It should have been him...
No. It shouldn’t have been him. He’d already decided that he’d make just as bad a father as his own father had been, and that Raina would be happier with someone else.
Suddenly he didn’t want to see Raina after all, not with the daughter that looked so like her. But it was too late. Gabriel had looked up and was signalling for him to come over and join them. There was no way out, and Alistair forced himself to smile as he walked across the office.
* * *
The interview had gone well. Raina had said what she wanted to say, and answered all of Maya’s questions. She’d seen Gabriel nod a few times, and although he hadn’t said much perhaps he would support her candidacy. If Anya didn’t get a place on the project, then at least Raina could tell herself that she’d done her best.
And then... Alistair. Standing at the far end of the office as she said her goodbyes to Gabriel and Maya. It would have been a great deal better if she hadn’t known him so well, because then she would have mistaken the smile he was wearing as one of surprised welcome.
‘Raina. It’s good to see you again.’ The way his thumb tapped against the side of the tablet computer he carried gave him away. Something was bothering Alistair.
‘And you. This is Anya.’
Anya was looking up at him, curious about this new person.
‘Yes, of course. Hello, Anya.’
He could barely look at her. Alistair had shown more genuine concern for the child he’d pulled out of the Thames than he did for Anya. Raina bit back the temptation to shake him and demand that he do a little more than just acknowledge her daughter’s presence.
Maybe he was just trying a bit too hard to step back. No decisions had been made yet, and he didn’t want to betray any bias. She shouldn’t either, which meant that the swelling around the cut on his face and the consequent bruising under his eye was out of bounds as a topic of conversation.
‘Your eye’s looking better, Alistair. How does it feel now?’ Maya asked the question that Raina didn’t dare to.
‘Much better, thanks. The antibiotics that Gabriel prescribed have done the trick.’ Alistair had the grace to look a little sheepish. ‘I really should have listened to Raina.’
‘Yes, you should...’ The words escaped her lips before Raina had a chance to swallow them down, and Anya looked up at Alistair.
‘Naughty Alistair.’
It could have been worse. At least Anya’s words hadn’t come right out of the blue, and Gabriel chuckled.
‘That’s right, Anya. My thoughts exactly.’ Gabriel ignored Alistair’s glare and Raina’s reddening cheeks.
‘We should be going.’ She found Anya’s hand, gripping it tight. ‘Thank you so much for your time. I really appreciate your seeing us.’
‘It’s been a pleasure. Thank you for letting me play with your bricks, Anya.’
‘You’re welcome,’ Anya piped up again, and this time everyone smiled.
Handshakes were exchanged, and Raina hurried Anya away, leaving Gabriel and Maya to follow Alistair into the office next door to Gabriel’s. She was trembling, Alistair’s quiet words when they’d parted had made her heart beat even faster than it had when she’d first seen him. Good luck. If that meant what she thought it did, then the awkwardness of their meeting was something that could be set aside. It was Gabriel and Maya’s decision whether Anya would be accepted onto the project, but Alistair had made his own position very clear.
CHAPTER FOUR
IT HAD BEEN plain to Alistair and he’d wondered whether Gabriel and Maya would see it too. The pilot scheme wasn’t just a matter of selecting the right children, it was a case of selecting the right parents, who could report back on their children’s progress and help the team make the required adjustments to their procedures. Anya and Raina were both perfect.
Maya and Gabriel followed him into his office and Maya sat down, while Gabriel leaned across the desk to look at his eye. Alistair batted his hand away.
‘It’s improving. I know I should have mentioned it to you sooner.’
Gabriel grinned. ‘Yes, you should. Next time you decide on any heroics, you might like to try following the advice of the doctor who was on the scene.’
Alistair glared at Gabriel and he backed off. This was the way it always was between them, they were firm friends whose disagreements were entirely without rancour. It was a synergy between two very different personalities, which brought the best out in both.
‘I’ve made my mind up.’ Maya ignored the glares in much the same way that everyone else in the office did. ‘I think Raina could make a huge contribution to the project and she seems committed to doing so.’
Gabriel nodded. ‘I agree. Anya’s one of the best candidates we’ve seen as well.’
‘And that’s the decision?’ Alistair didn’t want to say anything to influence his colleagues.
Maya glanced at Gabriel and he nodded. ‘Yes, let’s make it official. We’ll offer Anya a place on the project. We have two other children whose families have already accepted a place and you were going to speak with another three, Alistair.’
‘I’ve done that. Two would like to take part, and Sam Ross’s parents would like to wait. He’s going into hospital for an operation, and he needs to be fully recovered before we can work with him to his best advantage.’
‘So that’s five in all. The Dream Team can handle six,’ Gabriel said, pursing his lips.
‘Yes, but I’d rather have fewer children and be sure that they’re exactly right for the project.’ Alistair’s heart was beginning to beat a little faster. Everything he’d worked so hard for was becoming a reality.
Maya nodded. ‘That sounds good to me. And...you’re sure about working so closely with your ex-wife? If you have any concerns, I’d be happy to take Anya on myself.’
‘I’m sure.’ Alistair had made his mind up about this. ‘Raina only wants the best for Anya and so do I. Everything else is secondary, and we can deal with it.’
Gabriel raised his eyebrows but said nothing. Clearly he had the same doubts as Alistair did and he was going to do exactly the same with them. Put them to the back of his mind and make this work, whatever the cost.
‘Well, I’ll be there if you need me. I think it would be a very good idea to invite Raina to the conference you’re organising as well.’
Alistair frowned. It was a very good idea, but it meant treating Raina differently from the other parents on the project, and he’d promised he wouldn’t do that.
‘We’ve earmarked one day for the attending charities to exhibit their own work, and compare it with what the others are doing. Gabriel and I were considering asking all the parents if they’d like to come down for that.’
‘But Raina’s a doctor,’ Maya reminded him gently. ‘I think that she could contribute a great deal to the discussion over the whole of the three days. She has practical experience as a mother as well as understanding the medical issues.’
Alistair glanced in Gabriel’s direction. This was turning out to be more difficult than he’d thought, and he’d really rather not make the decision.
‘I think we should ask her. I know you don’t want to give Raina any special treatment, Alistair, but her qualifications as a doctor and a mother mean that she can make a valuable contribution. Excluding her on the basis of your previous relationship would be overcompensating.’
All the same, Alistair still didn’t feel comfortable about asking Raina to come. ‘You’ll mention it to her, then? When you do Anya’s initial medical examination?’
Gabriel shrugged. ‘Yes, I’ll ask her to save the date. It’s only a little more than a month away now.’
‘That’s agreed, then.’ Maya cut the conversation short with a determined smile. ‘I have two hours before I need to get back for my clinic. Which one of you is going to tempt me away from canteen sandwiches?’
Alistair chuckled, getting to his feet. Lunch was an altogether easier topic of conversation. ‘I’ll go over to the coffee shop and get something. There are a couple of things I’d like to discuss with you while you’re here, Maya...’
Even the lunchtime chatter and the blaring music of the coffee shop couldn’t dent Alistair’s mood. Suddenly he felt useful again. He’d taken time off work when the SSHL had struck, and had come back to find that Gabriel’s new wife, Clara, had been helping out. She was better than good for Gabriel, and his friend was happier than Alistair had ever seen him. Clara grounded his creative volatile nature, helping him to direct his energies in the right way. That had once been Alistair’s role, and although he was pleased to share it, and delighted to find the office running smoothly without him, he couldn’t help but wonder whether he was really needed as much as he’d thought he was.
His value seemed to have diminished over the whole spectrum of his work. People were getting on with their business, making telephone calls that he couldn’t hear and saying things that he only half understood. By the time he could put all the pieces together, the chance to reply was gone and there was another puzzling snatch of conversation to work on. He’d been running at full tilt just to keep up.
But now the project that Gabriel had encouraged him to concentrate on was coming to fruition. And Raina was going to be a part of it. Alistair couldn’t work out which of those things he was most looking forward to, and he didn’t question himself too closely on that score. Gabriel had been right, he’d needed a challenge. And that was exactly what he was going to get.
* * *
Raina was wearing a pair of dark slim-leg trousers and a neat white shirt. In Alistair’s experience, she had always dressed for effect, and the effect here was businesslike. Anya, on the other hand, wore a red and white sleeveless sundress. No attempt had been made to cover her arms and the little girl’s inquisitive air showed no sign of self-consciousness. She’d never been told that she was anything other than perfect, and Alistair knew from his dealings with other mothers that that was an achievement on Raina’s part.
He met her at the door to his office, putting on a smile. ‘Hi, Anya.’
‘Hello. Mummy says I mustn’t call you Naughty Alistair.’ The little girl regarded him solemnly and a sudden rush of tenderness filled Alistair’s heart. He glanced up at Raina, and saw her cheeks flushing red.
‘So what would you like to call me?’
Anya shrugged, letting go of Raina’s hand and reaching for the plastic food bag that her mother carried. ‘I made you a cake.’
‘We’ve been baking.’ Raina was clearly relieved that her daughter had changed the subject. ‘Anya helped with the icing.’
Alistair took the bag, opening it and unwrapping the greaseproof paper inside. ‘A cinnamon bun. Thank you, Anya.’
‘That’s all right. We’ve got lots more.’ Anya was peering past him into his office, and Alistair stepped back. Raina mouthed, Sorry, and Alistair shook his head. No apologies needed.
‘Gabriel’s given you the details of our conference?’ Alistair supposed he’d better mention it.
‘Yes, we talked about it when he did Anya’s medical examination. It sounds really interesting. I’d love to come.’
Alistair had been hoping that Raina might find an excuse not to attend. Conferences had a way of throwing people together, and he wasn’t quite comfortable with being thrown together with Raina yet. But he’d worry about t
hat when the time came.
‘Good. Gabriel’s prescribed a myolectric prosthesis for Anya. Do you have any questions about that?’
‘No, but...’ Raina pressed her lips together. ‘A myolectric prosthesis would give her the ability to move the fingers and take on more complex manual tasks, but it takes a bit of perseverance in learning how to use the muscles of the arm to control it.’
Alistair sat down behind his desk, putting the bun down next to the phone and waving Raina to a seat. This all seemed sufficiently businesslike. Raina had taken a rag doll from her bag, giving it to Anya, and the little girl had meandered over to the easy chairs that stood at the other end of the office and climbed into one, sitting the doll in her lap and whispering to it. Alistair couldn’t hear what she was saying, but presumably Raina could and was happy to let her play alone for a while.
‘And you have a concern about that?’
‘I don’t know. Maybe. A fixed or semi-flexible prosthesis is less expensive to produce and more durable, so it may be a more practical option to start with. Particularly if we’re not sure what Anya’s reaction is going to be yet.’
Alistair nodded. ‘We agreed that this was all about presenting Anya with choices. This project is about dreams and possibilities, so tell me which ones you want her to have...’
Raina’s wry smile told Alistair that she didn’t deal much in the currency of dreams. The last few years had forced her to deal with harsh reality.
‘The myolectric hand.’ She had one dream left, at least.
‘Then that’s what we’ll work towards. Let us worry about the expense and the difficulty, your job is to support your daughter.’
That would be a challenge for Raina. It had never been all that easy for her to let go and allow someone else to deal with a problem. But this was what she’d signed up to do when she’d accepted a place on the project, and Alistair couldn’t imagine that Gabriel hadn’t made that crystal clear to her.
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