‘Right, then. Leave that side of it with me, and I’ll organise it. And I’ll leave the introductory session to you, shall I?’ Alistair was clearly trying to keep the laughter from his voice, and failing miserably.
‘Sounds good.’
They sat for a moment, watching Anya play in the sunshine. Alistair was grinning broadly now.
‘So how did I do? Was I easy enough for you?’
‘You did just fine. Ten out of ten...’ Raina couldn’t help laughing now, too.
She saw Anya bend down to examine something in the grass, and got to her feet to see what it was. The little girl decided to make a race of it back to where Alistair was sitting, but suddenly he was taking no notice of them. The pager on his belt was vibrating and Alistair twisted it round to look at the tiny screen and accept the message.
‘Sorry, got to go. The clinic’s paged me...’ He was already on his feet, leaving his coffee on the bench behind him, and hurrying towards the entrance of the square.
It was like old times. But then they’d responded to the buzz of a pager together, and now she was left behind. Raina picked up his coffee, dumping it in the bin along with her own. Alistair had crossed the road and was taking the steps up to the front door of the clinic two at a time.
‘Are we going back?’ Anya was watching Alistair too, and Raina suddenly knew exactly what she was going to do next.
‘Yes, sweetie. And we’re going to run as fast as we can...’ Raina collected her bag and took Anya’s hand.
CHAPTER EIGHT
ONE OF THE nurses from the clinic met Alistair at the reception desk and before he had a chance to ask what the matter was, she had a reply for him.
‘There’s some trouble upstairs, in the group therapy room.’
Alistair nodded, making for the stairs. The clinic dealt with a number of PTSD patients and although the counsellors were skilled at nipping any disturbances in the bud, it was always a risk.
Upstairs, he found a group gathered around the door of one of the therapy rooms, the sound of yelling echoing out into the corridor. Everyone moved back as he approached, to clear his way to the door.
‘Thanks, everyone. Shall we move it downstairs...?’
The group began to disperse and Alistair looked for Joe, the counsellor who would have been taking the group. He was nowhere in sight and he must be inside the room still, along with whoever it was that was shouting at the top of his voice. Then he saw Raina, hurrying along the corridor towards him.
‘Where’s Anya?’ This was no situation for a child.
‘I left her with Kaia. She let me through the connecting door to the clinic, and I followed the noise.’
A small tingle of excitement threaded through Alistair’s veins. This was what it had been like when they’d first met. He’d been a newly minted doctor, while Raina had still been at medical school, and when she’d been rotated to his department the buzz of a pager in his pocket had meant just one thing. A shared glance, and they had been acting as one, hurrying to help. They’d moved past that first awkward meeting, on the banks of the Thames, when all Alistair had wanted Raina to do was stay out of the way and let him work.
‘Okay. Listen out for me, will you?’ There was no knowing what he might or might not be able to hear, but he knew for sure that if he missed something important, Raina would have his back.
She nodded, and he stepped in between her and the door, peering through the small pane of glass that gave a view of what was going on inside the room. It didn’t look good and he was going to need Raina’s help with this.
‘The counsellor, Joe, is in there and it looks as if he’s been hurt. Emma, one of the group, has stayed with him, she’s able to help as she’s a paramedic, but be aware that she has her own issues with confrontation. I don’t know the guy who’s doing all the shouting, he’s a new patient. I’ll try and calm him down, and if you can see an opportunity to get Joe and Emma out...’
He turned to Raina and she nodded. Alistair twisted the door handle quietly, opening the door.
* * *
Raina could hear the sound of a man’s voice, full of rage and pain. As Alistair opened the door she could see inside. A man was pacing up and down, stopping only to strike his head with his hands.
Raina curled her fingers around Alistair’s arm, mouthing a warning. Careful. That might not be PTSD.
Alistair nodded in agreement. Whatever was happening here, there had obviously been a fight, because Joe was sitting in one of the easy chairs, a dark bruise forming on his cheek. He was clutching his shoulder, beads of perspiration on his brow as he tried to calm the pacing man. Next to him, Emma was supporting his arm across his body in the best position for a dislocated shoulder.
‘Why don’t you sit down, Stuart?’ Joe’s voice was strained but calm, as he tried to diffuse the situation.
‘Can’t.’ Stuart struck his forehead with his hand, and turned suddenly, closing on Joe with his fists clenched. Emma flung herself between them and Joe tried to push her to one side, wincing in pain as he did so.
But Alistair was there. In between the two men, firmly but gently crowding Stuart back, channelling his attention away from Joe. Putting himself in the firing line would allow Raina to get Joe and Emma out of the room. Raina hurried towards them.
‘Emma? Are you okay?’ She whispered the words and Emma nodded. Raina had already seen the scars on her neck and that three fingers from one hand were missing, but Emma had clearly chosen to forget that she was a patient here, and her training as a paramedic was giving her the courage to face this situation.
‘What do you think?’ Raina had a good idea of what was wrong with Joe’s shoulder, but she wanted Emma to stay involved.
‘Looks like a dislocated shoulder,’ Emma replied, and Raina bent down, running her fingers over it.
‘I think you’re right.’ Raina turned to Joe. He was obviously in a lot of pain but he seemed to be holding himself together. ‘Do you think you can walk?’
‘Yes. I can walk.’
The smack of flesh hitting flesh reached Raina’s ears and she turned to see Alistair’s head snap back.
‘Not again!’ He muttered the words. That was the eye that had been infected and the blow seemed to have fallen pretty much in the same place as the cut had been. ‘Stuart, there’s no need for that, mate.’
Stuart seemed to calm once more, and Raina turned her attention back to Joe. Emma helped her to get him to his feet, and supported him towards the door, while Raina positioned herself between them and Stuart, in case he should break free from Alistair.
‘Is Alistair going to be all right?’ As soon as the door was closed behind them, Emma turned to her.
‘He seems to have everything under control.’ Raina hoped he did. She wanted to go back and make sure, but that wasn’t where she was needed at the moment. Ushering Joe away from the door and towards one of the consulting rooms was the last thing that Raina wanted, but she knew that Alistair was relying on her to do it.
As they made their way slowly along the corridor, a couple of male nurses came hurrying past them. Raina breathed a sigh of relief. If Alistair couldn’t calm Stuart and he became violent, that would even the odds considerably.
She and Emma got Joe onto the consulting-room couch, and Raina busied herself, examining Joe’s shoulder carefully. It looked like an anterior dislocation, and she called down to the nurses’ station, asking for an X-ray.
‘That was a brave thing to do, Emma.’ Joe spoke to her softly.
Emma shrugged, but she seemed pleased. ‘It’s all part of the job, Joe. And at least Stuart didn’t have a machete on him.’
So that was the cause of Emma’s scars. Raina shivered at the thought. But Emma didn’t need her sympathy at the moment, she needed to know that she could still do her job. Raina had to balance that with her concern for Emma’s welfare,
as well as Joe’s.
‘Is your wrist okay, Emma?’ Raina nodded towards the light support that Emma wore on her arm, as she tucked a pillow against Joe’s arm to make him more comfortable while they waited for the X-ray technician to arrive.
‘Yeah, it’s fine. I broke it four months ago and it still aches a bit sometimes, so I use the support.’
‘How did you do that?’ Raina asked the question casually, tending to Joe as she did so. Emma’s scars were obviously more than four months old.
‘Stupidity mainly. I tripped over a box of envelopes in the conference room. Gabriel needed his very best bedside manner as I cried like a baby.’
For all her bravery, Emma’s hand was shaking. It couldn’t have been easy for her to relive the experience of an attack.
Joe puffed out a breath. ‘Trust me, Emma, I’m thinking of doing the same.’ He was clearly concerned for Emma too, but his arm must hurt a great deal.
‘When we have the X-ray we’ll be able to make you more comfortable, Joe,’ Raina reassured him, and Emma nodded in agreement. Concentrating on Joe seemed to steady her.
‘Thanks.’ Joe nodded. ‘Where’s Alistair?’
‘I’m not sure. I’ll find out when the X-ray technician gets here, and if he’s available I’ll get him to review the X-rays and do the reduction if that’s what you’d like.’ He was a member of staff at the clinic, and he specialised in traumatic limb injury. And Joe knew Alistair and must trust him.
‘Yeah. Thanks.’
‘All right. Let’s all take a breath, shall we? Not too big a breath, Joe, I need you to stay still if you can.’ Raina filled her lungs, puffing out the tension, and Emma followed suit, grinning.
The X-ray technician arrived, and Emma followed them down to the X-ray suite. As Joe was wheeled into the radiography room, Alistair caught up with them.
‘Everything okay?’
Raina nodded, flashing a glance in Emma’s direction, and Alistair took the hint.
‘Cup of tea, Emma? You’ve done your bit now. You can leave Joe to us.’
Emma nodded. ‘I could do with one.’
Alistair shepherded Emma away, smiling and talking with her as they went. Raina sat down with a bump, expecting that he might be a while, but he returned after just a couple of minutes.
‘Is Emma okay?’
Alistair nodded. ‘One of the other counsellors is sitting with her in the coffee lounge. She’s a bit shaky, but this has been a huge step forward for her. How’s Joe?’
‘Probable anterior dislocation of the shoulder, the X-rays should confirm it and whether there are any fractures. What about Stuart?’
‘He’s much calmer, now, and there are a couple of nurses with him. It looks as if this is some underlying psychiatric condition. He’s a new patient, and when he went through the screening process there was no warning of this. His wife’s on her way and we’ll decide what to do when she gets here.’
Raina nodded. ‘Are you going to let me look at that eye this time?’
Alistair grinned. ‘I thought you’d never ask.’
He sat down, and Raina carefully examined the eye. Standing between his outstretched legs, their physical closeness made it hard to keep her mind on the job. Hard not to think about how different things were between them now.
‘Okay, there’s no damage been done to your eye, just the soft tissue around it. A couple of weeks and you’ll have your flawless good looks back.’ Raina turned away smiling, as if the part about the flawless good looks was a joke. It was far from that.
‘Well, that’s good to know.’ Alistair snorted with laughter, looking up as Joe was wheeled back out of the radiography room. ‘Hey, there, Joe. How are you doing?’
‘Not so bad.’ Joe’s face was ashen with pain now.
‘Joe would like you to look at the X-rays, Alistair, and take over his treatment.’ It was natural that Joe would want that, but it still hurt a little. Being a mum was the thing that fulfilled Raina, but she still missed being a doctor.
‘Thanks, Alistair. Only the best...’ Joe murmured the words and Alistair raised his eyebrows.
‘I’m only the best when Raina’s not in the room.’ The look in his eyes told Raina that this wasn’t an empty compliment, he really meant it. And that suddenly made everything all right.
* * *
Alistair had reviewed the X-rays, and he and Raina had agreed on a course of treatment. It was Joe’s prerogative to choose who he wanted as his doctor, but Alistair’s to choose who to work with, and Raina was the best. They carried out the gentle manipulation of Joe’s arm back into the shoulder joint, working together as if the last five years had never happened.
But it had. When Joe’s arm had been immobilised in a sling, and he’d been put into the charge of one of the nurses, the distance between them seemed to grow again.
And then Raina crossed the divide. Running the cold-water tap in the basin in the corner of the consulting room, she soaked a flannel and motioned for him to sit down.
‘Ah. That feels better. Thanks.’ His eye was beginning to throb and the cold, moist flannel felt good. It felt good to have Raina there too, holding the flannel gently against his face, her fingers cool and comforting.
‘I’m going to have to go in a minute. I should take Anya home.’
‘Yeah. I should catch up with Emma.’ But Raina was here now. Just a few more moments before they left the fantasy behind and went back to reality. That what they’d once been to each other was in the past now, and couldn’t be re-created.
Raina rinsed the flannel under the cold-water tap and reapplied it to his face. It was all Alistair could do not to sigh.
‘She was so brave. Staying with Joe like that after what happened to her.’
‘Yeah. You know, the more I work here the less I feel I know. And the more I feel our patients have to teach me.’ Emma had come to terms with her past in a way that Alistair doubted he ever could.
‘I think that shows you’re doing things right, doesn’t it? Close your eye for a moment.’
It hurt to close just one eye, so Alistair closed both. He heard the sound of water running and then felt Raina’s cool fingers and the flannel on his face. If this wasn’t the time to say what he’d been feeling for the last week, then that time was never going to come.
‘Anya’s a case in point. She has no thought of being disadvantaged, she just knows that she’s a little different and compensates. I think I should follow her example.’
The flannel moved, and he felt Raina’s finger, tapping gently against the side of his face in a sign that he could open his eyes now.
‘She’s only three. I don’t want her to ever feel that she’s disadvantaged, but I have to accept that the time might come when the world tells her differently.’
‘Maybe. But if she keeps listening to her mother, she can’t go far wrong.’
Raina raised her eyebrows. ‘That wouldn’t be an admission that I’m always right, would it?’
‘Nah. I’ve got enough to do at the moment, I wouldn’t want to add you to my list, after you’ve fainted from shock.’
‘Wise move.’ Raina laughed, rinsing the flannel in the sink and hanging it over the tap. ‘I think you’re good to go now.’
He was good to go. A little wiser for the time he’d spent with Raina, but that was never going to be a reason for them to be together again. He might understand the reasons for their divorce a little better, but that just meant that he knew that there was no going back.
Alistair got to his feet. ‘I’ll see you later in the week?’
‘Yes, I’ve arranged for a session with Kaia on Thursday.’ She paused, as if she’d just thought of something. ‘Were you serious when you said I could run with the parent support idea?’
‘Yes, of course. If you want to, that is.’
Raina nodded.
‘Yes, I want to. Thanks.’
CHAPTER NINE
RAINA UNPACKED HER weekend bag for the third time. She didn’t usually have this amount of trouble deciding what to wear.
‘I like this one, Mummy...’ Anya was sitting on the bed, sorting through the rejects pile, and held up a filmy, see-through blouse. She was using her prosthetic hand much more now, and as well as being able to use it to manipulate things better, the droop of her left shoulder as she struggled to equalise the length of both limbs had been corrected.
‘No, not that one, sweetie.’ Not for a conference. Certainly not for a conference with Alistair.
And this was important. The Watchlight Trust had been working on this for months and the list of attendees had been carefully selected.
Not to mention the venue. Raina wasn’t going to even think about the venue.
‘What about a suit?’ Raina held the dark grey skirt and jacket up against herself.
Anya wrinkled her nose and shook her head. Maybe she was right. Raina had bought the suit years ago, when she and Alistair had been divorcing. She hadn’t worn it much, the colour was too drab.
‘A dress, then?’ She had a few nice dresses that she could team with a jacket to smarten them up.
Anya nodded, throwing herself over onto her stomach. She was bored with this now, and if Anya was bored with a dressing-up session then it had definitely gone on too long.
‘Okay, the dress it is. And this one...’ Raina put the two dresses aside, along with a jacket that matched both, and surveyed the rumpled pile of clothes on the bed. Now for the cocktail party...
That was the most difficult. Raina had three suitable dresses, all of which had been bought while she’d been married to Alistair. Each one of them held memories.
Anya started to sing, and Raina joined in. Somehow that seemed to lessen the tension. Her little girl needed two hands to throw clothes around on the bed with, or make whatever mess she wanted. This was why she was doing this, nothing else.
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