Second Chance with the Single Mom

by Annie Claydon

  ‘You’re a lot more than that to me, too.’ Alistair picked up her hand, kissing her fingertips. ‘Friends?’

  ‘Yes. Friends is good.’

  ‘Along with the proviso that if you do feel like a romp between the sheets, you can always pick up the phone. I’m at your beck and call.’

  Raina smirked. ‘Apart from when you’re working, that is.’ There was a note of irony in her tone.

  ‘I guess so. Some things don’t change all that much.’

  Raina smiled at him. ‘I don’t suppose you’re free now, are you?’

  ‘Nothing in the diary.’

  ‘There’s nothing in mine either.’ She snuggled close, kissing him. ‘Which means that you’re at my beck and call, then?’

  ‘I’d love to be at your beck and call.’

  They made love again. Tenderly at first, and then with the increasing fervour that Alistair did so well. Somehow, it felt as if the unfinished business of the past was being swept away. If they couldn’t live together, then maybe this was their way of learning how to live better apart.

  * * *

  ‘You’re hungry?’ He found an empty table in the crowded restaurant, and they both sat down. No thought of taking this last chance of talking to the other delegates before everyone left for home, they only had eyes for each other.

  ‘I could work my way through the whole menu.’ Raina smiled at him. Alistair knew exactly what that meant. They’d always joked that great sex deserved a hearty breakfast.

  ‘I could too.’

  The noise around them made it difficult to talk. But words weren’t necessary. They both tucked into a full English breakfast, stopping only to exchange smiles.

  But gradually the world at large began to intrude. By the time they’d finished their second cup of coffee, people had started to approach Alistair to shake his hand and thank him for a great two days. Maya came to sit at their table, ordering toast and asking Raina about Anya’s progress.

  Raina left Alistair in the bustle of the reception area to go to her room and pack. And then there was no opportunity to speak with him privately. Alistair had torn himself away from a minor crisis involving a flat tyre on someone’s car, and met her as she prepared to leave.

  ‘Safe home.’ He walked her out of the building, to her car.

  ‘You too. I hope you get everything sorted.’ Raina nodded across to the group of people around the stricken car.

  ‘It’ll be okay. We’ve called the local garage, and they’re on their way.’ He caught her arm. ‘I have no regrets, Raina. I hope you don’t either.’

  ‘None. I’ll see you tomorrow? I’m coming into the office for a meeting with Ben.’

  He smiled. ‘I look forward to it.’

  As she drove away, Raina saw him standing in the car park, watching her go.

  * * *

  The drive home had allowed her some time to think. But when Raina shut her front door behind her, leaning against it as if to reassure herself that she was truly alone, she still hadn’t come to any conclusions.

  ‘What have I done?’ She asked the question, but there was no answer from the empty hallway. Undeterred, Raina continued the conversation.

  ‘It’s just...lust.’

  No, it wasn’t. If last night had just been lust then it wouldn’t be so complicated. They’d looked into each other’s eyes. She’d told him things that she’d thought she never would. It was only after they’d cleared the air that she’d truly given herself to him, and he’d given himself back.

  Unfinished business.

  The inescapable conclusion was beginning to haunt Raina. She’d thought that Alistair inhabited a world of regrets that were well and truly in her past. But she’d come to realise that they’d both been blinkered. Neither of them had been able to see past the pain of losing their baby and their divorce, and it was only now that each was able to see how the other had been feeling.

  Maybe they could rewrite their own story. Bring it to a close and allow themselves to move on. Because moving on was really the only thing they could do now.

  Raina picked up her case, hauling it up the stairs. She needed to wash Alistair’s scent from her body, and change her clothes. And then she needed to go and pick Anya up from her parents’ house and get on with her life.

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  ALISTAIR WAS BROODING in his office. It was tough to brood after what had happened between him and Raina. Edward was sitting on his desk, ready to show the next child how his tiny prosthetic arm worked, and he wanted to make a high five with the bear.

  He’d seen Raina briefly when she’d popped her head around his office door on her way up to see Ben. Alistair had been careful to treat her exactly as he would if that last night at the conference hadn’t happened. Not too forward. Not too restrained either. She’d obviously been doing the same and it had shown. Doing what came naturally didn’t seem quite so natural when you were thinking about it.

  Maybe they’d just pretend that it had never happened. But Raina’s admission that it was unlikely that she’d have children of her own had altered their shared history. And anyone who’d ever seen a film that dealt with time travel knew that one small alteration in the timeline could trickle down to the present day, changing everything.

  He saw Raina walk through the outer office just as the last of the staff were getting ready to leave. She was wearing a yellow top today, a bright sunflower hue, which suited her. She was also wearing a worried expression.

  ‘How did it go with Ben?’ Alistair decided to load the responsibility for Raina’s obvious discomfiture onto Ben’s shoulders.

  ‘Okay... It’s been a long day.’ She plumped herself down in the chair opposite his desk, dumping the untidy mass of papers that she’d been carrying onto her lap.

  ‘That doesn’t sound as good as it might have been.’ Alistair nodded towards the papers. ‘I see you’ve taken a few notes.’

  Raina rolled her eyes. ‘Ben’s great, and he’s trying really hard. He just finds it difficult to distil everything down into a simple overview of the system. Look, he’s printed out a copy of the user manual for the software for me. And he’s made a few useful annotations...’

  Alistair chuckled. ‘Do you want me to have a word with him?’

  ‘No, that’s okay. I challenged him to write a one-page summary of what the software can do, and encouraged him to use bullet points. I don’t see how he can confuse me too much with that.’

  ‘Did you specify font size?’ Alistair knew that Ben’s ingenuity would probably find a way of getting around the limitations that one page would put on him.

  ‘No, I didn’t.’ Raina frowned. ‘I said it had to be readable, so let’s hope he takes the hint and doesn’t make the text so small I can’t see it. And I told him that what’s blindingly obvious to him needs a bit of explaining to ordinary mortals like me, so he needs to start with the basics.’

  Raina thought she was an ordinary mortal? She was sunshine, and the cool, fresh touch of dew. She was a warrior champion for her daughter, and extraordinary in every way.

  ‘You underestimate yourself.’

  Her gaze met his and suddenly the full impact of their night together hit Alistair. What they could have done, if only they hadn’t given up on their marriage. History readjusted itself, and he felt the ripples wash over him.

  ‘It’s good of you to say so. I hope you’re right.’ She looked down at the pile of papers in her lap.

  ‘I think you’re one of the few people who can take Ben on and win.’ Alistair heard the tenderness in his own voice and tried to swallow it down. What he was about to suggest had nothing to do with their relationship, and it was best he make that clear. ‘Gabriel had a suggestion...’

  Raina nodded, seeming to catch the unspoken implication. ‘What’s that?’

  ‘He thinks it’s too much to as
k that you do all the preparatory work and hold sessions for new parents for free. I agree with him, and we’ve put together a draft job description. We can pay you an hourly rate, and you can work whenever you want.’

  He pushed the typed sheet across his desk, and Raina picked it up, studying it. Perhaps he should have said that Gabriel had drafted the job description. But there was only so much distancing that Alistair could do before it started to look too obvious.

  Raina put the paper back down onto his desk. ‘It’s a really good overview of what I need to do, and I’d like to keep that. But I’d feel more comfortable with donating my time, at least for starters.’

  Maybe Raina was happier with an arrangement that didn’t make him her boss. Alistair could concur with that.

  ‘It’s not within my remit as a director of this charity to force the money on you.’ Alistair applied his mind to the problem. ‘Maybe we could help you by providing childcare for Anya. It’s something we’d need to look into for the parents who’ll be attending these sessions with you.’

  ‘Yes... Yes, that would be great. My mum will always take her, but I’d prefer not to rely on her. And Anya loves coming here.’

  ‘Okay. We’ll do that then. But if the project really takes off then your role will expand with it. If you’re doing more than one day’s work a week, we’ll be insisting that you consider taking a salary.’

  Raina nodded. Now was about the time that she should be getting up from her seat and telling him that she had to go and pick Anya up. They’d said all they had to say about the business side of things, and there was no excuse for Alistair to keep her here, and none for Raina to stay.

  All the same, she didn’t move. And neither did he.

  It was awkward. And it wasn’t like Raina. She’d always been so ready to tell him what was on her mind and how she was feeling, and sometimes Alistair felt that she jumped straight in without really thinking about it. He, on the other hand, thought about it so much that he usually didn’t get around to saying anything.

  But things could change. Alistair took a breath.

  ‘Raina. About the other night...’

  She looked up at him far too quickly. And the sudden blush on her cheeks told him that she’d been thinking about that too. He swallowed hard, making an effort to collect his thoughts.

  ‘Raina, I don’t want to pretend it didn’t happen because...what we shared was important.’ He glanced at her and she nodded. No need to elaborate, she knew what he was talking about. ‘Whatever happens next is fine by me.’

  She was looking at him steadily. ‘What will happen next?’

  ‘I have no clue.’ Alistair rubbed his hands across his face. ‘But I won’t regret any of it, because I feel that we cleared the air between us a little.’

  ‘And the sex was pretty great. The best, actually...’ This was the old Raina. The one who said exactly what she was thinking as soon as it came to mind and she accompanied it with a sudden, mischievous grin.

  ‘It pretty much redefined the meaning of best...’ Alistair ventured a compliment that was really only the truth, and Raina shot him a look of delighted glee.

  This was about as much of an inquest on the night before as Alistair could cope with. He got to his feet awkwardly, and Raina followed his lead. ‘I’d better be going. I need to pick up Anya.’

  ‘Sure. You’ll be back to take another run at Ben tomorrow?’

  ‘What, you think he’s got me beaten already?’ Their conversation had done one thing at least. Raina had lost the air of dejection that she’d had when she’d walked into his office.

  ‘The idea never crossed my mind.’ Alistair chuckled, opening the door of his office for her. As Raina walked past him, she glanced outside at the empty workspace and turned quickly, brushing a kiss onto his cheek.

  ‘Thanks for the talk. Especially the part about redefining best...’ She murmured the words and then she was gone.

  Alistair slowly raised his fingers to his cheek. He could no longer convince himself that he’d take what they had and be content if it never happened again. Every part of him wanted more.

  * * *

  They were like flies, caught in amber. Raina was afraid to go on, but she didn’t want to go back either. Alistair had made no move, and perhaps he was feeling as confused as she was.

  Concentrating on the task in hand helped take her mind off it all. After her second session with Ben, she felt able to write a basic overview of how the computer system worked, and what it could provide. Now she could move on to medical and social issues, which she felt much more at home with.

  It was fun as well. Working on this stretched her in a way that she’d missed since she’d given up work to look after Anya.

  Anya was learning how to make the most from her new prosthetics. She still used the fixed hand for rough and tumble games, so that the myolectric one wasn’t damaged, but Kaia had begun to teach her how to use the myolectric hand for more complex tasks.

  It was becoming the norm that she’d walk into Alistair’s office and find that he and Anya were taking a break from the serious business of the day and concentrating on building castles. When she walked into his office, two faces looked up at her with exactly the same expressions.

  Only Anya voiced the disappointment. ‘I don’t want to go, Mum...’

  ‘We’ll be back tomorrow.’ Two faces brightened at the prospect, Alistair’s a little more because he had a firmer grasp on the reality of tomorrow.

  ‘But my castle...’ Anya stuck her bottom lip out.

  ‘Alistair will keep your castle safe for you. It’ll be here.’

  That wasn’t Anya’s concern. She got to her feet, walking carefully around the half-built fairy castle made from sparkly bricks, and put her small hand on the side of Alistair’s face, tipping it towards her.

  ‘Can you hear me?’

  ‘Yes, I can hear you, Anya.’ Alistair was trying to suppress a smile and failing miserably. Anya’s insistence that he hear everything she said was something that seemed precious to him.

  ‘Don’t play with my castle when I’m not here.’

  ‘No, Anya. I won’t.’

  ‘Promise!’

  Alistair nodded solemnly, putting his hand on his heart. ‘I promise.’

  Clearly suspecting the same as Raina, that the promise might be a hard one for him to keep, Anya tugged at his arm, and Alistair got to his feet. Pulling him away from the castle, and to the other side of his desk, she pushed him into his chair.

  A tall, powerful man entirely at the mercy of a child. Anya wasn’t just another child that The Watchlight Trust could help, he was falling in love. Raina blinked tears from her eyes as she bent down, lifting the castle carefully and putting it on top of the filing cabinet. Alistair stayed put, grinning, while Anya helped her scoop the bricks on the floor back into the bucket.

  ‘Shall we take your magic hand off now?’ The fixed hand was much lighter for Anya to wear.

  ‘I want it on me. In the car.’

  Raina glanced in Alistair’s direction and he nodded. ‘All right, sweetie. Go and say goodbye to Heidi.’

  Anya ran from the room, and Heidi turned her swivel chair to give the little girl a hug goodbye, and a sweet from the jar on her desk.

  ‘How is she doing?’

  Alistair frowned. ‘Kaia’s made a lot of progress with her, but she’s still using the hand as a scoop. She’s having a bit of trouble using the muscles in her arm to move the fingers.’

  Raina held up her little finger, wiggling it. ‘But she’s managed to get you wrapped round this one.’

  ‘Nonsense.’ Alistair took a shot at an unconvincing denial, and then smiled. ‘I’ll see you both tomorrow.’

  * * *

  The next day, Raina spent the afternoon alone in the conference room, putting the finishing touches to her induction tal
k. Time ran away with her, and when she returned to the main office, she found that Kaia had finished her session with Anya, and Alistair was babysitting. She could see him through the glass partition, sitting on the sofa with his feet propped up on the coffee table. Anya was sitting next to him, her head resting against his chest, and Heidi shot Raina a grin, beckoning her over to her desk.

  ‘How long have they been doing that for?’ Alistair had stretched out his left hand in front of Anya, and was curling the fingers one by one. She mimicked the action with her own fingers. Then the harder part. He extended his right hand, moving his thumb. Anya frowned, trying to emulate the movement with her prosthetic.

  ‘Oh, about half an hour.’ Heidi grinned, shooting Raina a knowing look. ‘You can’t help liking a man who’s good with kids, can you?’

  ‘No. You can’t.’ Especially a man who was good with her child. And more particularly when it was Alistair...

  A child’s shriek of delight came from the office. Anya had moved the thumb of her prosthetic and Alistair was grinning at her. She reached up, tapping his face and giving an instruction that Raina couldn’t hear. But she knew what it was. Again...

  Alistair nodded, stretching out his hand again and moving his thumb. Anya copied the movement perfectly this time, and Alistair nodded, giving her a luminous smile.

  ‘Would you like some coffee, Heidi?’ The temptation to rush into the office, catch her little girl into her arms and hug her was pounding at her heart. But this was Alistair’s moment. He’d worked hard for it, and it was a shared triumph for him and Anya that Raina didn’t want to take away from them.

  ‘Don’t you want to...?’ Heidi gestured towards the office, and then smiled. ‘Yeah, it would be a shame to disturb them. And I could do with a coffee. Thanks.’

  As she made the drinks, Raina glanced back at Alistair. He wasn’t pushing things, knowing that if he did Anya might reject the work they’d already done. He had one of the sparkly bricks in his hand and was fiddling with it absently as he talked to Anya.