The Scars of Us

by Nikki Narvaez

  “Well, what happened? Is everything okay?” Her voice lost some of the venom that had been in it.

  I explained everything that happened at the club last night, but I started with Ryker and I having sex on Thursday. I hadn’t told her about it because I was so upset, but she needed to know everything to understand the events of last night. Nori didn’t say anything for several seconds, then finally spoke, “So, how was it? I bet he was amazing.”

  That was an understatement. He was beyond amazing. “It was… unbelievable.” I sighed dreamily as I flopped back on the bed. “He made me feel things I’ve never felt before, and gave me the best orgasm of my life. There just aren’t words.”

  Nori giggled. “Wow, that’s awesome, Ky. I’m really happy for you.”

  “Can you believe what he said to me after, though?” Thinking about it still hurt, and it was hard to push the thoughts away when they were so fresh.

  “He’s a guy. They aren’t good with rejection. He thought you were blowing him off after literally just having sex with him—total ego killer. Obviously, he didn’t mean what he said or else he wouldn’t have gone to the club looking for you, and he definitely wouldn’t have saved you from that asshole. Actions speak louder than words, girl.”

  I picked at the ends of my hair as I released a sigh. “True. Words still hurt though.”

  “I can’t believe you told him about Kaleb.” Her voice was filled with disbelief.

  “Me neither. I mean, I didn’t tell him everything.”

  “Why did you tell him?”

  That had surprised even me—I hadn’t told anyone anything involving Kaleb except Kamden and Nori.

  “When he saved me, I felt like I at least owed him some of the truth for my actions. And, even after what he said to me, I trusted him. Like you said, actions speak louder than words.”

  “Yeah, he seems like a great guy that just has some issues. If anyone should be able to understand that, it should be you.”

  I snorted. “Yeah, I’m sure his issues are nowhere even close to being as fucked up as mine.”

  “You never know, Ky. Maybe you should ask him about them.”

  “I don’t like being asked about mine. He’ll tell me when he’s ready.”

  “Just like you will?” she countered.

  Will I? “I don’t know if I’ll ever tell him—I don’t want him to look at me differently.”

  “If he cares about you, he won’t. Then, you’ll know whether he’s worth it or not.”

  “I’m not ready for that yet.” I blew out a deep breath. “I don’t think either one of us are. We just agreed to start dating. Baby steps, Nori, baby steps.”

  “You’ve made a lot of progress. I’m really proud of you, Ky. Seriously.”

  I smiled from her words. “Thank you. It’s hard, but I’m trying. Oh, I almost forgot! Monday is our appointment at the hospital.”

  “I know. I thought that’s why you were acting all crazy yesterday.”

  “Oh. No, I totally forgot. Kamden just reminded me.” My smile began to fade as I thought about the appointment, my chest tightening in anxiety. I rubbed my hand over it, trying to ease some of the tenseness.

  “I’m planning to come over to your apartment that morning and we can all ride together.”

  We talked a little more about Monday before we hung up. Heading to the bathroom, I searched for some aspirin since my cheek and head were still pulsing with pain.

  I didn’t realize how exhausted I was until I lay back down on my bed. Sleep found me within seconds.

  I was extremely wound up at class on Sunday because of my impending visit to the hospital the next day. I was so not prepared to be in the same building as Kaleb. It also didn’t help that I was unsure of how to act around Ryker in front of the other students and instructors. It was probably against policy or something for him to be with me, so I didn’t want to get him into any trouble.

  Ryker approached me as I was hitting my bag. “Everything okay?” he asked as he eyed me warily. How could he always tell when something was bothering me?

  “Yeah, just a little stressed.” A lot stressed, actually.

  “Anything I can help with?”

  “No—I’ll be okay. Hitting the bag helps.” I forced a smile.

  Those warm eyes told me he knew better, but he didn’t question me further. “Just don’t overdo it, Warrior,” he said as his lips curved up slightly.

  After class ended, I waited for Ryker to close up before we left together. He walked me to my car, then crushed his lips against mine, stealing my breath as he passionately kissed me. Holy crap.

  Pulling back slightly, we both gasped for air.

  “I’ve been wanting to do that all night, that and so much more,” he said, holding my face in his hands.

  Our mouths reconnected in a frenzy as Ryker’s hands roamed over my body. He hooked my legs around him, pushing me against the car as his erection pressed into my core. I might have moaned, I wasn’t really sure since I couldn’t process anything but the feel of Ryker all over me.

  “Come home with me,” he murmured against my lips.

  Oh, how I wanted to—so badly. It probably wasn’t the best idea given what I had to do tomorrow, but then again, it might be good for me to lose myself in Ryker before I had to deal with Kaleb.

  “Okay.”

  Even though I answered him, Ryker didn’t release me. He kept relentlessly devouring me right there in the parking lot. I couldn’t have even told anyone my name once we finally stopped—that was how amazing that man kissed.

  “My warrior finally gave in,” he teased when we finally stopped. “You can follow me there.”

  As I drove behind him, I started to reconsider what I was doing. I’m going to have to explain my rules—do I really want to go into that right now? What if he laughs in my face? Shit, why did I agree to this? Maybe I should just turn around and go home… no, I can’t do that to him. I’ll just have to tell him something came up and leave—that’ll work.

  Once we were up in his apartment, I tried to give Ryker the excuse I came up with, but his mouth silenced mine, capturing my lips as soon as he locked the door. Shit I can’t lie to him—I’m just going to have to tell him the truth.

  Pushing him away, I disconnected our lips and locked our eyes. “We need to talk.”

  “We need to talk.”

  No man wanted to hear those words, especially when first starting out, but Kaiya was standing right in front of me saying them. The last time I’d heard those words, things didn’t end well for me.

  “About?” I questioned as I searched her face. I rubbed my hand on the back of my neck anxiously. I had no idea what Kaiya was going to tell me—with her, it could be anything.

  Sighing, she led me to the couch, and we sat down. “Before we have sex again, you need to know my rules,” she advised me matter of factly.

  Some tension lifted off me. I expected worse. Rules? This is going to be interesting. “Go on.”

  She exhaled a heavy breath. “One, I don’t do foreplay—strictly sex.”

  Raising an eyebrow, I caught her gaze. “No foreplay?” We’ll see about that.

  “No foreplay. Two, my throat is off limits. I don’t like having it touched.”

  Her hand had gone instinctively to her throat, covering her small scar. She still refused to tell me what had happened. I wondered if it had anything to do with the scar I’d seen across Kamden’s chest when he worked out.

  “Three, I have to control when I… when I go.” she stammered nervously.

  “Go? Go where?” I teased, trying to lighten the mood and pry out the words she was having such a hard time saying.

  “You know what I mean, Ryker.” She blushed as she avoided looking at me, staring down at her hands in her lap. She was so innocently sexy when she was embarrassed.

  I sat back and shrugged, playing dumb. “No, I don’t. You’re going to have to elaborate.”

  Sighing with exasperation, she flung h
er hands out. “Come, okay? I have to control when I come.”

  Interesting. “You didn’t seem to have a problem with that before.” I smirked.

  She glared at me and pressed her lips in a tight line. “Well, I have a problem now. If you can’t accept my rules, then maybe we shouldn’t do this.”

  Raising my hands in surrender, I apologized, “I’m sorry. Any more rules?”

  “Just one more—I don’t spend the night.”

  Leaning forward, I propped my elbows on my knees and rubbed my hands together. “Okay—anything else?”

  “No. Are you okay with them—with this?” she asked as she gestured between us.

  I considered her question, thinking about her rules. I knew all these stipulations for sex had to do with her abuse when she was younger. On one hand, I didn’t want to push her away by disregarding her rules, but on the other, rules were made to be broken. And I wanted to break hers.

  “For now.” I grinned mischievously. We silently stared at each other for a few seconds. “But one day, I will break each of those rules—one… by… one. And you’re going to love every second of it when I do.”

  “I wouldn’t be so sure about that,” she weakly challenged as she broke away from my gaze.

  Suddenly pulling her into my lap, I grasped her hips, pushing her down against my cock. She gasped as I grazed my lips against hers. I gruffly murmured, “I’m going to let you have your way now, Warrior. But trust me when I say that those rules will be broken—soon. I guarantee it.”

  I claimed her lips with mine, smothering any response or argument. The only sounds I wanted to hear were the moans and whimpers she was already making as my tongue entered her mouth and twined with hers. I’d been waiting all night to feel her, to taste her, to just lose myself in her—class had been torture since I couldn’t touch and kiss her like I wanted to, and I was going to make up for it the rest of the night.

  My hands rubbed along the curves of her ass before I gripped it and rose from the couch. Carrying Kaiya to my bedroom, I kicked open the door and walked to the bed, laying her down. I reluctantly separated our lips, tugging my shirt over my head before doing the same with hers, eager to feel her bare skin against mine.

  Once the rest of our clothing was removed, my mouth easily found hers as I pressed against her on the bed, covering her flesh with mine. My hands ran up and down the curves of her naked body, enjoying the feel of her silken skin as I savored her sweetness.

  I rubbed my dick against her pussy, causing her to writhe under me. “You’re so wet for me already,” I growled against her lips while I rocked against her.

  She whimpered as I bit her bottom lip before sucking it into my mouth. Nudging against her entrance, I barely pushed the tip of my cock inside her before dragging it out again. Kaiya’s moans became deeper and louder as I teased her, gripping her hips and readying to thrust inside her.

  Slowly, I sank myself into her, enjoying the feel of how she stretched to accommodate me. Her body arched into me as I spread her thighs, pushing myself deeper into her warmth.

  Once Kaiya was completely full of me, I pulled out before pounding back in again, causing her to cry out as she dug her nails into my forearms. Pumping in and out of her pussy, I increased my strokes, building up the pleasure within both of us.

  Kaiya wrapped her legs around my waist before squirming under me, attempting to turn us over. As I told her I would, I let her flip me and have control. This time. I wasn’t going to complain about having a hot woman riding me.

  Her hair curtained around my face as she rocked against my cock, caressing it with her soft flesh. Biting her lip, she closed her eyes in pleasure as she rode me, driving my cock further inside her. Fuck, she feels so good.

  Her fingers dug into my chest as her pace increased, her walls tightening around my dick as she neared climax. Throwing her head back, she cried out my name and her body shuddered in ecstasy, pulsing around me as she went limp.

  Flipping her over, I repeatedly slammed into her, seeking my own release. Her pussy was freshly moist from her orgasm, making it easier for my cock to slide in and out of her.

  The combination of her wetness and snug walls clenching around me finally sent me over the edge. I groaned as I pulled out, coming on the inside of her thigh as I buried my face in her neck. So fucking good.

  We both lay there for a few minutes, catching our breath before I got up to grab Kaiya a towel. When I walked back towards her, she averted her gaze from my naked body and the flush on her face deepened.

  As she took the towel from my hand, she commented, “We need to start using protection.”

  “Why? It feels so much better without it.” I gave her a crooked grin.

  She gave me a look, like the one a mom gives her child when she’s trying to be mad at them, but couldn’t.

  “Besides, we’ve already done it without one.” I shrugged.

  She shook her head as she fought a smile, propping herself up on her elbows. “You better not have given me any STDs.”

  “I don’t have any STDs. I’ve always used a condom.”

  “Yeah, I’m sure you use that line with all your women.” Her expression and tone were full of disbelief.

  Laying back next to her, I brushed some hair out of her face. “Seriously. I’ve always used a condom before you.” And her.

  She stared at me, searching my eyes for a sign that I was lying. She opened her mouth to say something, but changed her mind and closed it before getting up and picking her clothes up off of the floor.

  “What’s wrong?” I sat up on the edge of the bed while she moved around.

  “Nothing,” she brusquely replied, avoiding looking at me.

  “Bullshit.” I stood and walked over to her. Turning her around, I softly demanded, “Tell me.”

  After several seconds of silence, she sighed, looking down at the clothes in her hands. “I’m afraid that I’ll be just one of the many women you’ve been with and that you’ll just toss me to the side when you get bored with me.”

  Her words were like a jab to the gut. I didn’t make it a secret that I went through women like a college frat boy, but Kaiya had to know things were different between us, that she wasn’t just a hook-up. Hadn’t I told her that? By the sad look on her face, she had no clue how I felt about her, that I didn’t plan on using her like I did the others.

  Taking her face in my hands, I lifted it until she looked at me. “I’m not gonna do that to you. You’re not like the others, Ky.”

  “How do I know you’re not just saying that?”

  “Because I’m standing here telling you that I’m not. I’m a lot of things, but I’m not a liar. If I wanted just a one-time thing, I wouldn’t have bothered with you after Thursday night, especially after the fight we had. I wouldn’t be here with you right now—I would be with someone else.”

  Once again she searched my gaze with hers, looking for the truth in my words. Doubt and apprehension still resided within her eyes, which I expected given her past. I knew it would take more than just my words to make her believe me, so I showed her how I felt with the only way I could think of.

  Leaning down, I softly pressed my lips to hers, hoping I could chip away at some of her walls. The clothes fell from her hands and her arms slowly glided up around my neck as she reciprocated my kiss, pushing her body against mine.

  I grabbed the undersides of her thighs and picked her up, wrapping her legs around me as I took her back to the bed. As soon as we met the mattress, I entered her in one, swift thrust, rooting myself deep within her.

  I wanted to take my time with her, show her that I meant what I had said, but that was so fucking hard with the way her body fit mine, perfectly molding to me as we tangled in sexual ecstasy.

  Kaiya lifted her hips, making me sink deeper within her. I groaned against her lips before tracing over the bottom one with my tongue ring. She moaned, then sucked my tongue back in her mouth, eagerly consuming me while I fucked her.

 
My hands tangled in her hair as I devoured her, loving the taste of her hot mouth. Pulling on the soft strands, I caused her to gasp against my lips while I thrust slowly inside her, bringing us both closer to climax again.

  I wanted to make her come, especially since she told me she needed to control it—that made me want to do it even more. I lowered my hands, slowly caressing each curve of her soft body, intensifying my strokes. “I want to make you come, baby.”

  She weakly protested, shaking her head, but she continued to kiss me. Fuck, I wanted to break her rules so bad, demolish every boundary between us, but I knew I couldn’t do it all at once. We’d already broken this rule before, so it was a good place to start. “Please, baby, let me make you come.”

  After a few seconds, she whimpered in my mouth, “Yes.”

  I nibbled her bottom lip, then sat up. Her half-lidded gaze found mine as I hooked my arms around her thighs, gripping the delicate flesh in my hands as I began to pummel her.

  “Fuck, baby, you’re so tight around me. I love the way your pussy hugs my dick,” I growled.

  Kaiya’s eyes rolled back before she closed her eyes in bliss, fisting the sheets while I pounded into her. She was so close to coming; I could feel her tightening around me as she repeatedly moaned my name.

  Then, her thighs began to tremble in my hands as she orgasmed. Tremors of pleasure racked her body as her walls throbbed around my cock, sending me into euphoria with her. I barely pulled out before I started coming, streaming my release all over her stomach.

  Reaching over the side of the bed, I picked up the towel I had brought for her earlier before wiping my cum off her skin.

  Once I was finished, I pulled her body to mine, wrapping my arms around her and pressing a kiss to the top of her head. “I know you don’t completely trust me, but it’s different between us. I’m not going to use you.”

  She kissed my chest, then looked up at me. I loved the flush I put on her skin from just having sex with her. “Prove it.” Her voice was strong, but those beautiful eyes looked vulnerable.