Hard Ever After

by Laura Kaye

  Becca shook her head. “I was so freaked out, I just wanted to get out of there.”

  “I didn’t know about this until just now, or I would’ve brought us home earlier,” Kat said.

  “I’m sorry,” Becca said, turning to Nick’s sister. “I just wanted to forget about it for a few hours.”

  “I know,” Kat said. “You don’t have to apologize, but I’m worried about this.”

  Nick nodded. “Can you think of anyone at the hospital who would do this? Who would have a problem with you?”

  “I know some ­people are upset that I’ve asked for time off for the wedding and our honeymoon after being on leave for two months.” Becca scrubbed her face with her hands. “I overheard some women talking at the nurse’s station yesterday. But I can’t imagine anyone doing something this cruel. And twisted. Kat’s right.”

  “I don’t like it, Becca,” Nick said, his hackles all up. “I don’t like it at all. I’d like to go with you tomorrow to talk to hospital security. They need to know.”

  She gave a quick nod. “Okay.”

  “Is this why you freaked out when Beckett came up behind you out back?” he asked.

  Becca sagged back against the couch. “Partly.”

  Nick frowned, his instincts flaring. “What’s the other part?”

  The quick look Becca exchanged with Emilie had Nick’s gut twisting with worry, especially when Em gave her a small nod. “I know it’s ridiculous,” Becca said in a small voice, “but I keep thinking I’m seeing Woodson.”

  The words hung there for a moment and rushed ice through Nick’s veins.

  Emilie got up and gestured for Nick to sit. He slid onto the couch next to Becca. He’d barely put his arm around her shoulders when she buried her face against his chest, her arm clutching his neck. Her shoulders shook with restrained tears. “Aw, Becca,” he said, his heart absolutely aching. How had he not seen this?

  “I’m sorry,” she rasped.

  He locked eyes with Kat, whose expression was every bit as concerned and upset as he felt. “You don’t have anything to apologize for. You hear me?”

  A quick nod against his chest.

  Guilt flooded into his gut. Why hadn’t he ever considered that the attempted abductions might have traumatized Becca? She’d been so strong through it all that he’d just assumed she was fine. No wonder she’d asked him what had happened to Woodson. Yet, once again, he hadn’t probed deep enough. “Shit, I’m the one who should be apologizing.” He stroked her hair.

  “No,” she said, shaking her head as she pulled away. Her face was red and wet and her eyes were puffy, but she was still the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen. “How could you have known? It just felt so ridiculous that I didn’t want to say anything.”

  “Tell me what’s been going on,” he said, cupping her cheek in his palm and swiping at her tears with his thumb.

  She gave a shy little shrug. “I keep thinking I see him. One minute he’s there, and the next he’s not. At random times. Around the hospital. On the street. Tonight at the mall I kept feeling like someone was watching me, but of course no one was there. Just like no one’s ever there. I was just freaked out about the stuffed animal. After all that, Beckett just scared me and everything kinda crashed in on me.” The words spilled out of her in a rush.

  “It’s not ridiculous, Becca,” Emilie said. “It’s PTSD.” Before all this, Emilie had worked as a clinical psychologist at a local university. Given the shit all of them had been through, she’d been an incredible resource for the whole team these past months.

  “But I was fine,” Becca said, looking from Nick to Emilie to Kat. “I was fine after it happened.”

  “The crisis of the investigation probably kept your brain otherwise focused. But then you went back to the scene of the abduction, and you were out on your own for the first time in months.” Emilie knelt where Nick had been. “Your nervous system is finally trying to process what happened to you. The anxiety, the reliving of the event, the spontaneous memories, the paranoia. These are all normal given what you went through.”

  The list of symptoms lashed at Nick’s soul. He hated that Becca was hurting. Was the shit that had happened in Afghanistan never going to stop raining down on them? “She’s right,” Nick said, taking Becca’s hand. “How frequently has this been happening?”

  Becca frowned, and her gaze went distant. “Maybe a half dozen times since I started back to work.”

  “Aw, Sunshine,” Nick said. He hated that she’d been carrying this all by herself. But no more. “What can I do to help?”

  “I don’t know,” Becca said. “I know it’s not real. But I can’t seem to make it stop.”

  “It’s gonna take time,” Emilie said. “I can help you with some techniques to reduce and combat anxiety. Or you might consider seeing a therapist at the hospital.”

  “Okay,” Becca said. “I’d like to talk to you, I think.”

  Emilie nodded.

  “Maybe you should consider taking off even earlier than you planned,” Kat said. Nick could’ve hugged her, because his thoughts were running in the same direction. But the last thing Becca needed was for him to be an overprotective asshole right now.

  “I only have four and a half more shifts,” Becca said. “I’d hate to bail on everyone last minute.”

  “Becca,” Kat said, taking her other hand. “You’re always taking care of everyone else. You have to let us take care of you, too.”

  “I know,” Becca said in a small voice. “I think if we address this stuffed animal with the hospital and I’m talking to Emilie, I’ll feel better.”

  “That’s a good start,” Nick said. “But until you take off, I’m walking you in and out of the hospital at the beginning and end of your shifts. If you have wedding errands you need to do, I want to be at your side. And, hey,” he said, gently turning her face toward him. “Please talk to me. I can’t be there for you if you don’t let me know what you need.”

  Nodding, Becca gave him a look that nearly broke his fucking heart. “I just didn’t want to worry you.”

  He lifted her left hand to his mouth and kissed her ring, then he pressed her hand to his heart. “Taking care of you is my job, Sunshine. For the rest of my life. In good times and in bad, remember?”

  Glassiness filled her eyes. “Yeah.”

  Kat rose, and Emilie followed suit. “We’ll give you guys some time alone,” Kat said. She leaned over and pressed a kiss against the top of Becca’s head. “I had fun shopping with you, sis.”

  It was the first smile he’d seen from Becca since he’d walked into the room. “I had fun with you, too, Kat,” Becca said. “You’re going to be the best sister ever.”

  “Hey, I already am,” Kat said with a grin. She and Emilie left.

  “Can we get ready for bed?” Becca asked in a small voice. “I’d really like to just lay down with you.”

  “Of course,” Nick said, helping her up. They got changed without talking much, then he climbed into bed and held his arm open to her. Becca crawled in alongside his body and fitted herself tight against his side, like she always did. She fit so fucking perfectly against him. Nick stroked his fingers through her hair. “I don’t want you to ever feel like you can’t talk to me. About anything.”

  “I know. I do feel like I can,” Becca said, shifting to meet his gaze. Her eyes were so blue. “I should’ve said something sooner. I’m sorry.”

  “I get it,” Nick said. “I do. But the best thing about having a team is you get help carrying the load. You and me. We’re a team now.”

  Becca smiled. “Always and forever.”

  “That’s fucking right.”

  “I won’t forget again,” she said.

  “You didn’t forget, Sunshine. You’re still just getting used to the idea. Me too.” He hugged her in against him. “It’s hard
to lean on someone else when you’ve been so used to walking on your own.”

  She nodded. “I love you, Nick.”

  “I love you, too. There’s nothing to worry about. I promise you,” he said. And Nick was going to do whatever it took to make that the truth.

  WHILE BECCA WAS in the shower the next morning, Nick let the guys know what was going on. Standing around the island in the kitchen, he said, “Becca is dealing with some PTSD from the abduction attempts. Probably triggered by returning to work, the scene of the first attack. And she keeps thinking she’s seeing Woodson.”

  “Damn,” Beckett said. “We all saw how roughly he treated her when he tried to grab her the second time. It’s no wonder she’s struggling.”

  Nick nodded, the memory souring the coffee in his gut. “Vance has given me some circumstantial evidence that places Woodson in South Carolina, where he’s been since we interrogated him, but just keep your eyes open. Be on the lookout. I’m going to do a little more digging there to make sure Becca’s not discounting something that’s really there.”

  “Can’t be too careful,” Beckett said.

  “No, not with Becca. That’s for damn sure.”

  “This place is about as secure as we can make it,” Marz said. “So we’re good here. And the cameras from around the neighborhood are still up and running, so if you have Woodson’s vehicle specs, I can keep an eye out. Make sure nothing’s hanging around that shouldn’t be.”

  “Do that,” Nick said. “Thanks. I’m going to talk to hospital security this morning about this damn thing.” He pointed to the stuffed animal, sitting in a plastic bag on the counter.

  “Sick fuck,” Shane said, glaring at it. “You should let Vance know about this, too.”

  “I will. I’ve got a whole to-­do list on this today. I’m going to talk to Vance after I leave the hospital, and then I’m going to drop by the inn and work with them to beef up the event security they already provide. I don’t want Becca thinking about anything besides having a good time on our wedding day.”

  Nods all around.

  “What am I missing? Can you think of anything else?” Nick asked.

  “Would it make her feel any better to carry a weapon?” Shane asked, his gaze serious.

  “Good question. I’ll talk to her about it. She doesn’t have a concealed carry permit, though, and even though some of us flouted that law the past ­couple of months, I don’t know if she’d be comfortable doing so.” Though Nick and Beckett had had Maryland permits, the other guys were from out of state and hadn’t. Carrying illegally was just one of the ways they’d had to work outside the law to clear their names. Now that they were opening a security firm of their own, all the guys were in compliance. Their business was going to have to be run completely by the book.

  “Maybe you should get in contact with Chen,” Beckett said. “If Vance can’t track Woodson down, Chen sure as hell should be able to. He fucking owes us anyway.”

  Nick nodded. “True. I’ll do that.” Chen was the CIA operative who’d first assigned Frank Merritt to the undercover corruption investigation in Afghanistan that had snowballed into the shit storm of the last year. When Nick and his team had rescued Charlie and picked up the investigation, Chen had found them and offered the vital assistance that had finally allowed the team to take down the bad guys and clear their own names. Chen wanted them to work for the CIA from time to time, which meant he was predisposed to do them favors. And Nick wasn’t above asking.

  “Hey,” Becca said, walking into the kitchen. Wearing a set of lavender scrubs, she looked fresh faced and beautiful. His sunshine.

  “Hey,” Nick said, hugging her in against him. “Want a bagel before we go?”

  “Sure,” she said.

  Nick busied himself with the task, then turned around to find Easy wrapping her in his arms. “I’m here for you, Becca,” he said in a quiet voice. One by one, the men repeated the action and the words. This was what family looked like. It made Nick fucking proud. And, truth be told, it choked him up. Just a little.

  An hour later, they were sitting across the desk from the hospital’s chief security officer, a tall, wiry man with graying blond hair and a weather-­beaten face. Barry Coleman had served for twenty years in the Marine Corps and worked in security for the past eight, facts that already made Nick feel a little better about leaving Becca there today.

  Becca recounted when and how she’d found the stuffed animal, and Coleman asked a series of probing questions. Finally, he said, “Unfortunately, we don’t have a security camera inside the staff break room. After Becca’s attack, we secured and alarmed that external door, and we put cameras on all the main entrances into the ER, but I’ll have one installed in there today. Just for some extra peace of mind. And I’ll get my team on reviewing the personnel rosters and camera feeds from yesterday to see if we can pull together a list of ­people to talk to. This is harassment and intimidation, Becca, and we won’t tolerate it for a second. I can promise you.”

  “Thank you,” she said.

  “In case it needs to be said, there’s no chance Tyrell Woodson could get in here again. We have photographs of him posted at all the monitors. The whole security team knows what he looks like, including the BPD officers stationed in the waiting room,” Coleman said.

  “We have reason to believe he’s out of the area anyway,” Nick said. “We heard South Carolina.”

  Coleman nodded. “That’s good to know. We’ll get to the bottom of this, I promise.”

  Nick shook the man’s hand, then he and Becca walked out through the back part of the ER. In the break room, Becca stowed her purse in her locker. “You sure you’re okay being here?” Nick asked, his hands rubbing her shoulders. “No one would blame you for cutting out a few days early.”

  “I want to do this,” Becca said. “I promise I’m okay. And I wouldn’t hesitate to go to Coleman if something happened.”

  Nick nodded. “Okay. I’ll be here at three to walk you out. Have a good day, Sunshine.”

  She smiled. “You, too. I can’t wait to celebrate tonight.”

  “Me too,” Nick said. Tonight all of them were having dinner together at a great local steak house before parting ways for their respective bachelor and bachelorette parties. Nick kissed her for a long moment, and he didn’t want to admit how hard he found it to walk away and leave her.

  But he had things he needed to do today to give them both some peace of mind. Vance, Chen, the inn. Nick also wanted to drive by Woodson’s last known address and make sure nothing was going on down there. Anything to help Becca feel better and get past the way his life had exploded all over hers.

  It was the least he could do.

  Chapter Eight

  THAT NIGHT AT dinner, Nick couldn’t keep his hands off Becca. Despite the fantastic food, the great company of friends, and the well-­deserved celebration, all he wanted was to get Becca alone somewhere so he could flip up the flirty skirt on the stunning little yellow dress she’d worn and get inside her any and every way he could.

  Part of it was the top-­shelf liquor flowing all around the table, and part of it was the relief Nick felt after all his efforts today had panned out in one way or another. Vance had found a parking ticket on Woodson’s car from two days ago in South Carolina, and Chen had agreed to put his considerable resources into not only pinpointing the guy’s location but also getting him off the street once and for all. The inn had agreed to additional security, and the head of the security company they used had even made the time to meet with Nick. The guy and his team seemed competent, smart, and savvy, so there was another thing on their side. And Woodson’s last known address had not only been quiet as a grave but dust-­covered to boot. No one had been there any time recently.

  That still left the mystery of the stuffed animal, of course, but Coleman was on it, and Becca’s day at work had been incident-­free
. They’d get to the bottom of that yet.

  Becca had been visibly relieved when Nick had filled her in on his day. Now, she seemed so relaxed and happy that it made his fucking heart ache.

  Sitting at the dinner table surrounded by their friends, Nick squeezed her thigh. She turned to him wearing a huge smile, a champagne glass in her hand. “Are you feeling frisky, Mr. Rixey?” she asked.

  Nick leaned in close. “No, I’m fucking horny. I want to mess up your lipstick and tear off your panties and make my fingers and cock smell like you.” He leaned back again, his face carefully neutral.

  Her eyes were wide—­and full of heat. “Holy shit. How am I supposed to be apart from you the rest of the night after that?”

  “Welcome to my world, Sunshine.” He threw back a gulp of whiskey.

  “Come here. I want to taste that off your tongue,” she said.

  “Jesus,” he gritted out, but it wasn’t like he was turning down a kiss. She leaned in, giving him a great view of her cleavage down the front of her sequined strapless dress, and grasped his face in her hand. Her lips were warm, soft, and tasted like champagne and the chocolate mousse cake they’d shared for dessert. Fucking delicious. Her tongue slipped around his, and she pressed herself closer.

  “Someone pull those two apart,” one of the guys yelled.

  Nick grinned even as they continued to kiss. He wasn’t voluntarily giving up Becca’s mouth, that was for goddamned sure.

  “All right,” Kat said from the other side of Nick. “We better get the rest of the night underway before we lose the bride and groom.” Laughter all around as everyone got up from the table.

  “Do you think they’d notice if we snuck away?” Becca asked, her face absolutely glowing.

  Beckett grabbed Nick by the shoulders. “Get up, Rix. The tables are waiting for us.”

  “Apparently,” Nick said. “You go have a good time, Sunshine. But you be ready for me later.” He arched a brow.

  “Oh, I will,” Becca said, her tongue licking at her bottom lip.

  Shit, he had it bad for her. And he fucking loved it. This woman was going to be his wife. How fantastically lucky was he? A man who just months ago would’ve said he didn’t believe in luck, unless it was of the bad kind.