12 Stocking Stuffers
Page 76
She gasped at the shock of cool air against her heated skin, felt her first bout of modesty as he lifted his head and looked his fill. His eyes burned with hunger, his gaze ravaged. She shivered, but didn’t move. Nor did she protest when he licked the tips of his fingers and slicked them over her nipples, drawing them into tight, aching points. But she groaned, long and low, when he lowered his mouth and laved those tender crests with his tongue, then drew her into the hot depths of his mouth.
Biting her lower lip to keep from crying out, she pushed her fingers into his hair, brazenly holding him close as he leisurely lapped and suckled and nuzzled. He worked his wet mouth from one breast to the other, his tongue, lips and teeth teasing her with devastating thoroughness. The pleasure was dizzying, and frustrating, and in an attempt to soothe a sharper, more intimate ache, she clamped her thighs against the one riding high between hers and arched into him.
A harsh, aroused sound hissed from Austin, and he buried his face at the side of her neck, his breath hot and moist against her flesh. “Teddy…” he whispered huskily, his voice raw with a want so urgent it invaded every cell of her being. His palms slid down her sides to grip her hips, and rocked her rhythmically against that treacherous thigh of his, building the pressure. “All night I’ve thought about the taste of you, the feel of you. It’s not enough. Not nearly enough.”
Passion fogged her mind, short-circuiting rational thought. “Not enough,” she echoed the sentiment, turning her head to the side to give him better access to the column of her throat.
His tongue touched the delicate shell of her ear, making her skin quiver, and his hands roamed lower, beneath the hem of her dress. Questing fingers rasped against the stockings covering her legs, her thighs…higher still. “I want to make love to you.”
Yes, her body screamed, her feminine nerves already spiraling toward that release. All it would take to send her over the edge was the touch of his fingers against slick folds of flesh, the seductive caress of his mouth on her breasts. The elemental need to make love to this man mixed with something deep and soul-stirring, overwhelming her with emotions she’d severed herself from years ago.
Panicked that he could make her feel so much when she’d been content to be alone, she pressed her palms to his chest, pushing gently, but firmly. “Austin, we can’t do this.”
He immediately stopped his seduction, slowly withdrawing his hand from beneath her dress, leaving her aroused, and very disappointed. The rhinestone straps of her dress slid back up, and the bodice covered her breasts once again.
Concern etched his features, and he brushed her hair away from her face, his gaze searching. “Hey, you okay?”
No. She was scared, and confused, but admitting either defeated the purpose of all those years she’d struggled to build her confidence. “This is happening too fast.”
“We can take it slow,” he said, his deep, rich voice still holding the vestiges of desire. Bracing an arm against the wall at the side of her head, he skimmed his knuckles down her cheek in a feather-light caress. “As slow and easy as you need it to be.”
Her skin tingled at the thought of how good slow could be with this sexy fantasy man. “Impossible, when I unravel when you just look at me, and I melt when you touch me.” Like now, those insidious fingers of his were causing all kinds of havoc with her libido.
A roguish grin curved his mouth, and he looked pleased with that revelation. “No, slow doesn’t seem to apply to the attraction between us,” he agreed. “But I’m not just talking about sex, Teddy. I’m talking about us.”
She swallowed, hard, trying to keep her rising wariness at bay. “Us?”
“Yeah,” he murmured, trailing that treacherous finger along her jaw to her lobe, eliciting a deep, dark shiver that made her body feel like warm molasses. “You. Me. A slow building relationship. Us.”
She shook her head, feeling crowded, and not just because his body surrounded hers. Emotionally, he was slipping under her skin, forcing her to reevaluate her personal life, and she didn’t care for what she was discovering. Moving around him, she put some distance between them, shoring up her fortitude. “There is no ‘us.”’
“There could be.” When she didn’t respond, the set of his jaw turned determined. “You honestly believe there isn’t something between us worth pursuing?”
She rubbed the slow throb beginning in her temples, and chose her words carefully. “I can’t afford any diversions right now, Austin.” Her voice implored him to understand. “Not when I’m so close to getting everything I’ve worked so hard for. And I can’t allow great sexual chemistry to distract me when I need to stay focused on my job.” She’d only wanted a date for the evening, her own personal fantasy for hire. When had things become so complicated? “Besides, you and I have different goals, and certainly opposite visions of the future.”
“Not as much as you might think,” he said, ruthless intent in his gaze. “Or maybe it’s just easier for you to believe that.”
Anger flared within her, that he’d touched on part of the truth—a truth that made her too vulnerable. She was scared of taking personal, emotional risks, for fear of being stifled. It had taken her years to establish her independence, to gain the self-confidence to stand on her own, and there were always those niggling doubts that she couldn’t mix business with a relationship and find an equal balance. In her experience, the latter always won.
She grasped a stronger argument. “You fulfill women’s fantasies, for crying out loud! How opposite is that?”
He jammed his hands on his lean hips and sighed, sounding as weary as he was beginning to look. “It’s just a job, Teddy, and it isn’t who I am. Fantasy for Hire was a means to an end. It isn’t my entire life.”
There was more. She could see it in his eyes. But she didn’t want to hear anything else, didn’t want to give him a chance to sway her decision. “As much as I want you, I can’t do this right now. I don’t have time in my life for a relationship, and that’s not fair to you.”
He stepped toward her, so genuine and understanding. “Teddy—”
She held up a hand to stop him, knowing his touch to be a powerful persuasion. “Please, Austin,” she beseeched him. “Don’t make this any more difficult than it already is. You’re a great guy, and you deserve better than what I can offer you, which is nothing permanent.” She bit her bottom lip, acknowledging on some feminine level that she wished she could be the kind of woman he wanted, but she wasn’t cut out for marriage, and babies, and all those other things that tied a person down and restricted their freedom.
He stared at her for a long, intense moment, his green eyes darkening with resignation. “All right,” he finally relented, and swiped his jacket from the floor. “You win, Teddy.”
It wasn’t a joyful victory. Her throat burned, and her chest hurt at the thought of never seeing him again. She opened the door before she changed her mind. “Thank you, Austin. For everything.”
“The last thing I want is your gratitude for something I wanted to do.” Just as he passed through the threshold, he stopped and turned back around, his chiseled features expressing deep regret. “Good luck on your promotion, Teddy. I hope you get everything you want.”
She was certain the double meaning ringing in his words had been unintentional on his part, but it was there nonetheless, haunting her, forcing her to think about what her desire for that promotion might have cost her. She found the thought disturbing.
And then he was gone, leaving only the warm, male scent of his cologne lingering in the entryway, and a horrible sense of loss blossoming within her.
Leaning against the wall for support, she slid down until she was sitting on the carpeted floor, her knees upraised. Dragging a hand through her tangled hair and trying not to think about how much she enjoyed being with Austin, she let out a deep breath that did nothing to ease the new tension banding her chest.
Her gaze landed on the cluster of mistletoe he’d used to seduce her, and she picked it
up, holding the sprig of Christmas spirit in the palm of her hand. Her throat tightened, and a piercing pain wrenched her heart.
Damn Austin McBride anyway, for making her realize just how cold and lonely her life was, for making her question everything that was important to her—everything she’d struggled to attain without the support of anyone.
She’d sacrificed so much to prove her own self-worth to her family, to herself. But this sacrifice was hurting more than she’d ever imagined.
AUSTIN STOOD beneath the hot, stinging spray from the shower. He’d spent a restless night tossing and turning in bed, caused from frustration, confusion and a healthy dose of annoyance that Teddy Spencer had, in effect, brushed him off.
Well, not brushed him off, exactly, he amended as he braced his hands on the tiled wall and dipped his head beneath the invigorating jet of water to rinse his soap-slick body. But her brand of rejection stung nonetheless. He’d served his purpose in aiding Teddy in her plight to dissuade Louden, and she’d never promised him anything beyond last night. He’d known that. He’d followed through with Teddy’s plan with his eyes wide open, knowing it was all an act. So why did he return home last night with his stomach in knots and a keen sense of disappointment riding him hard?
The answer came easily. Despite knowing Teddy had expected nothing more from him than a performance, he couldn’t help feeling used on some basic male level. The unpleasant sensation was one he’d experienced before, and he’d have thought he’d learned from that brief encounter with a woman who’d taken advantage of him for her own self-centered motivations. Diane certainly had her own agenda when she’d pursued him. Too late, he’d discovered that her interest had been for the fantasy he created for her—that of a part-time plaything to keep her occupied when she was bored with her wealthy life and friends. Emotional involvement hadn’t been part of her plan—just an exciting affair that abruptly ended when he no longer served a purpose in her capricious life.
Despite that lesson learned, he’d wanted to believe Teddy was different, that her ulterior motives wouldn’t cloud what seemed so obvious and right between them.
He’d been wrong.
Swearing at his stupidity, he turned off the water, grabbed the thick navy towel hanging over the stall and scrubbed it over his damp hair and wet body.
“She did you a big favor, buddy,” he muttered to himself as he stepped from the shower. “And she’s definitely all wrong for you,” he continued as he trekked naked into the bedroom, where the early-morning sun was just beginning to seep through the second-story bedroom window to warm the hardwood floor.
Grabbing his favorite pair of soft, faded jeans, he pulled them on and concentrated on all those wrongs, mentally ticking them off in his head: her wealthy family, who wouldn’t approve of him, her job being more important than a relationship, and her admitted unwillingness to balance the two.
He finger-combed his thick, damp hair away from his face, and tried not to grimace at the less-than-refreshed reflection in the mirror—he looked tired, haggard and as irritable as a provoked bear. “You have every reason to be grateful that she didn’t allow things to progress further than they had last night,” he told himself, pivoting toward the bedroom door.
But as he headed downstairs, he found it difficult to be gracious about Teddy’s rejection when he’d tasted the need and hunger in her kiss, and in the way her body had responded so openly and honestly to his touch. There had been nothing calculated about her soft groans as he’d caressed her breasts, nothing fabricated about the sensual way she’d arched toward him for more.
Letting out a deep breath to erase those arousing thoughts that would surely haunt him for months to come, he entered the kitchen. Jordan, who’d always been one to be up bright and early, flipped down the corner of the Sunday sports section and glanced at Austin. A slow grin spread across Jordan’s face as he homed in on his brother’s cantankerous disposition.
“You look like hell this morning, little brother.” Humor threaded Jordan’s voice and creased the corners of his eyes.
Austin gave a noncommittal grunt in response. Of course, Jordan looked neat and orderly and ready to begin the day, his knit shirt pressed, and his jeans crisp and a vivid shade of blue, which indicated they were fairly new. Austin barely contained a disgusted snort. Didn’t his brother ever dress for anything but success?
Jordan’s grin increased. “And you should be plenty rested, considering I heard you come in just a little after midnight.”
Jordan’s insinuation that Austin’s evening plans hadn’t ended as he’d personally hoped rankled. Crossing the cool tiled floor, he opened the cupboard and brought down a bowl and a box of cereal, then withdrew a carton of milk from the refrigerator. “I thought I’d outgrown you waiting up for me long ago.”
“Oh, I wasn’t waiting up.” Jordan folded the section of newspaper neatly, and laid it aside. “I was awake, in bed reading. Even if I wasn’t, the way you stomped up the stairs and slammed your bedroom door would have woken the dead.”
He grimaced as he carried his breakfast items to the table. “Sorry,” he said, genuinely contrite. Sitting across from Jordan, he poured Cap’n Crunch into his bowl and added a generous amount of milk. Jordan looked on disapprovingly at the sugared cereal, which Austin had eaten for breakfast since the age of eight.
Jordan believed in a healthy start to the day; Austin wasn’t about to sacrifice his favorite cereal for the scrambled eggs, wheat toast and cantaloupe his brother preferred. “I guess I’m still not used to having someone else in the house.”
“I figured as much.” Jordan shoveled scrambled eggs onto his buttered wheat toast and took a bite while considering Austin through curious eyes. “Dare I ask how things went last night?”
Austin tried for a nonchalant shrug and failed miserably. “Depends on whose point of view you want.”
“How about hers?” Jordan asked, slicing his cantaloupe into precise wedges.
“Great.” Unequivocally, Austin was sure. There was little doubt in his mind that everyone at Sharper Image had fallen for the ruse, which could only work to Teddy’s favor.
“And yours?”
He scooped up a spoonful of cereal, glancing at Jordan before taking the bite. “Disappointing and frustrating.” And a multitude of other emotions he didn’t care to verbally analyze.
Jordan digested that, appearing sympathetic. “Care to talk about it?”
Austin wasn’t one to spill his guts about personal issues, but Jordan had always been a good listener, reflective without judging, and Austin needed that quiet male camaraderie and support right now. “The night itself was great. In fact, I can’t remember the last time I had such a good time with a woman. Teddy is smart, sexy, amusing…and entirely too determined,” he added on a note of annoyance.
Jordan lifted an eyebrow. “Usually that’s a good thing.”
Austin pushed his half-eaten bowl of Cap’n Crunch aside. “She’s determined to the point of seeing nothing beyond her promotion.”
“Can’t begrudge a person for wanting to be successful.”
Austin didn’t miss the bitter note to his brother’s voice that had nothing to do with Teddy.
“I don’t begrudge Teddy for wanting that promotion, but what about being successful and making time for a relationship?”
Jordan picked up his glass of orange juice. “Depends on the person’s priorities.”
Austin snorted. Teddy had made it patently clear where her priorities lay—in the hands of Sharper Image. “I guess I went with her to this party expecting something…different. Like maybe another date, where we could get to know one another without that ridiculous charade between us.” Shaking his head, he scrubbed a hand over the light stubble covering his jaw. “Man, it’s been a long time since I’ve felt that way about a woman.”
Jordan chuckled, the sound entirely too gleeful. “She certainly has you tied up in knots.”
Austin scowled, but knew he’d be a hypocrite
if he denied what was so obviously the truth. Teddy did have a hold on him, one he couldn’t shake. She made him think about things he’d decided were beyond his reach until his landscaping business was financially stable. She made him think about what it would be like to come home to her smiles in the evening and her soft, feminine scent filling this old Victorian house. And then there was the luxury of making love to her every night, and waking up beside her for the next fifty years.
Commitment. Security. And the comfort of having a family. After years of playing the field, the notion appealed to him. More and more with each passing year.
Folding his hands over his bare belly, Austin leaned back in his chair, rocking on the solid hind legs. “Jordan, you ever think about settling down?”
Stacking his fork and knife on his plate, Jordan shrugged noncommittally. “I thought I was close once, but it didn’t work out, which is just as well because look at where I am now. If I had a family to support, I never would have been able to quit and walk out on those dishonest bastards.”
Austin nodded in understanding.
“Now, I’m an unemployed architect, living with my bachelor brother, and I have no idea what the future holds.”
“You could always take over Fantasy for Hire,” Austin offered with a devilish grin.
Jordan visibly shuddered. “I’m nobody’s fantasy, and I prefer to conduct business with my clothes on, thank you very much.”
“You don’t give yourself near enough credit. I’m sure there are women out there who fantasize about straitlaced architects.” Austin ignored the dirty look Jordan cast his way. “I’d sell you the business real cheap.”
“What, you thinking of giving up being the object of every woman’s fantasy?” Humor threaded through Jordan’s voice.
“I’ve been considering selling the business for a while now,” Austin admitted. “Not only is Fantasy for Hire becoming too much for me to handle along with all the business coming in for McBride Landscaping, I’m tired of all the pretense.”