Back to You

by Lauren Dane

  He left quickly and she leaned her head back, closing her eyes.

  She’d given up on Vaughan being there when she’d needed him at all a long time ago. Wished it didn’t matter that he’d been there that night.

  It made a difference. And she was a fool to let it.

  It seemed as if she’d been trying to get over Vaughan Hurley since before they divorced. Of all the people she’d sought attention and affection from in her life, only Vaughan still had a hold on her heart and it made her so stupid, but love did that.

  With a groan, Kelly sat up and pulled out her phone to text her best friend. Stacey was across the country in Manhattan. She was attending some conference where she was presenting a paper. As much as Kelly wished Stacey could be there with her right then, this paper was a big deal.

  So she kept her text pretty light. Gave the basic details and urged her to stay in New York. There really was nothing Stacey could do at that point, but Kelly would keep her updated.

  That done, she texted Ross. He didn’t like Vaughan, though he never showed that in front of the girls. He was resentful of any time Kelly spent with him, even for family events, and jealous that Vaughan had a connection to Kelly through their children. She filled him in about the situation with Maddie and said she’d talk to him when he got up.

  All that done, Kelly stood, stretching. She pulled on Vaughan’s sweatshirt, as it was indeed chilly in the waiting room. It had been years since her skin had been this close to his scent and it sent her reeling.

  An ache that she’d grown accustomed to many years ago throbbed at the memories of what it had been for a brief, shining time. She slammed that shut by remembering the Hurleys would be showing up soon enough.

  Of this she had zero doubt. They’d drop whatever they were doing and rush over because Vaughan needed them, and every damned one of them would show up to support him and Maddie.

  Mostly she was grateful her children had that support and love in their lives. Mostly. Her former mother-in-law might hate Kelly, but she loved her grandchildren and her sons.

  Kelly had no room to judge. Especially because she had absolutely no plans to call her mother. Rebecca Larsen was in the Hamptons for the summer—at the house Kelly’s money had bought—and Kelly liked it that way.

  Kelly had grown up in an angry, turbulent household. At twelve, when she’d walked a show for the first time, she’d recognized it as her means to get away from Rebecca.

  When she’d given birth to Maddie and they’d gotten home from the hospital, Kelly had been alone with her daughter and she’d made a promise right then and there to make a family with that tiny creature. To keep her safe and loved and to do her all to empower and raise a child who knew every moment of every day that she was worthy.

  With a sigh, Kelly focused on the prerequisite black-and-white nature photo on a far wall as she sank into a chair. Letting herself go blank, a meditation technique she’d learned from an old roommate back in her modeling days, Kelly let go of everything that wasn’t Maddie.

  Being a mother hadn’t made Kelly into a woman or anything like that. But it had dug roots into Kelly’s life in a way she’d never really experienced before. This was a toss-yourself-in-front-of-a-speeding-car-to-save-someone love, and it had revolutionized her entire existence.

  She’d been strong in a way she could look herself in the mirror every morning and not flinch. Sometimes the only thing that gave her the ability to keep going was to always be a good example to her kids. Maddie would be fine because Kelly would rip the world apart to make it so.

  * * *

  THEY MOVED DOWN to the main waiting room once Vaughan had returned with the food. Only he and Kelly had been allowed in the one just outside the pediatric surgery, but they could see through to those doors from where they were seated now.

  “Not the first time we’ve eaten diner food after one in the morning.” He grinned at her. She wore his sweatshirt and though it had been so long, he wasn’t surprised that it still made him greedy for her. Or that it made him remember the way she’d looked in nothing but one of his T-shirts after a show.

  She balled up her napkin after wiping her mouth. “I’m not as young as I was then. I’m going to have to take an antacid. As far as a meal in a hospital this late at night goes? It’s top-notch. Thanks for going to pick it up.”

  “It gave me something to do and like I said, I was hungry, too.”

  “I hadn’t really had the chance to ask how the tour went.” There was a caution in her tone that he rarely heard from her on other subjects.

  This topic was full of briars and hidden traps between them. Had been. And maybe, just maybe, it was his fault.

  Before he could answer, though, Kelly stood, a smile on her face. “Why are you here? I told you to stay home.”

  Vaughan withheld his growl of annoyance at the sight of Kelly’s boyfriend Ross strolling into the waiting room and enfolding Vaughan’s wife into a hug she clearly needed. One Vaughan hadn’t offered. Because he had no right to anymore.

  Ross kissed her forehead and Vaughan wanted to punch the guy. The guy who said, “I decided you could be forgiven for such a ridiculous request since you were under duress. Of course I’m here. Where else would I be?”

  All Ross’s attention had been on Kelly but Vaughan knew very well the other man hadn’t missed Vaughan in the room. Especially when Ross’s gaze focused on Vaughan for long moments before he released Kelly and held a hand Vaughan’s way.

  “Hey, Vaughan. Good to see you. Sorry about the circumstances.”

  Ross may not have liked Vaughan, but he had good manners. He also clearly loved Kelly. And why shouldn’t he? Kelly was gorgeous. She had her own businesses, she was a great mom and she was smart. And funny. Her skin was really soft and she smelled really good.

  “Good to see you, too.” Which was a total lie. Vaughan would be happy if he never saw the other dude’s mug again.

  Ross turned back to Kelly. “What’s happening with Maddie?” He brushed her hair away from her face. “Let’s sit.” He led her back to where they’d been sitting, settling next to Kelly.

  Vaughan used that opportunity to check in with his brothers but even with his back turned, he could see their reflection in the window he stood before.

  * * *

  KELLY LEANED INTO ROSS. Relieved that he’d come. Soothed by the stability he always brought into her life. “Who’s with the girls?” Ross had two daughters roughly the same age as her own.

  “My mom came over. I wouldn’t even have seen your text until the morning but I got up to go to the bathroom and I saw my phone as I passed back to bed.”

  He kissed her temple and spoke into her ear. “Did you think I wouldn’t come? With all his family most likely moments from descending on this hospital?”

  Of course he would have thought about how it would feel for Kelly to be the only non-Hurley in that room. She knitted her fingers with his. Ross was what she needed. Steady. He would carry his weight. He was what she’d been missing most of her life.

  Though it had been something she found herself having to repeat over and over like a mantra, and she was pretty sure it wasn’t because it made her so happy to think about.

  Halfway through her telling, Sharon and Michael Hurley came in, heading straight to Vaughan, hugging him and speaking quietly before they all returned to settle in to wait for news.

  * * *

  THE DOCTOR CAME in shortly after that to let them know Maddie was out of surgery and that things had gone well. Vaughan stood at her side and squeezed her hand at the news.

  They went back to recovery where they were allowed to kiss Maddie and tell her they loved her. Kelly pulled Pete from the pocket of her hoodie and tucked him in against Maddie’s side. “Daddy brought Pete to keep you company.”

  Maddie’s smile was g
oofy as her eyes slowly closed.

  “So glad you brought him,” Kelly murmured as they left.

  “Yeah?”

  He looked so eager for her approval it made Kelly feel guilty.

  “Yeah.”

  “They’re buds.” He shrugged, blushing a little.

  He may have never taken his kids to a dental appointment, but he knew that. He didn’t know their friends, either, but he knew how much his daughter loved that stuffed animal and that it would comfort her. He paid attention when it mattered. At least when it came to his children. Which in the big picture was important. She chided herself to always remember. Especially when she started to get bitter. Things could always be worse.

  “Hang on a second. I need to stop by the nurses’ station.”

  He stood at her side as she made sure they had her daughter’s allergies noted. She also got the times they could come back to see Maddie.

  In the long hallway, before they hit the swinging doors leading back to the waiting room, Vaughan stopped her. “Hey, thank you for letting me be here. It means a lot to me.”

  “It means a lot to her, too.”

  His smile was lopsided. The one she’d dropped her panties for way back when. It still made her happy and sad all at once.

  “What’s next? What can I do?” Vaughan asked, looking a little lost.

  “I’ll hang out here awhile longer and then head home. You should go and get rest. You have a tour-ending show tonight.”

  He stopped her with a hand at her shoulder. “This is a million times more important.”

  It was, of course, but it was nice to hear him say it. Even if she didn’t believe him all the way. He’d chosen music over his family more than once. She understood that this tour meant they were employing the crew, filling seats with fans who loved Sweet Hollow Ranch and who’d be disappointed if they didn’t play. So many livelihoods to be responsible for.

  “Look, I’m not going to be upset if you do. If she keeps improving over the day, there’s no reason you should cancel,” Kelly said. Which was true, of course.

  Vaughan looked as if he was arguing with himself but finally shook his head. “Ezra and Paddy hooked me and my parents up with hotel rooms for today. We also talked about tonight and the show and we’re all agreed that we’re waiting to see how Maddie is today. I’m not going anywhere, Kel.”

  Kelly nodded. Even though she knew he hadn’t been before. She’d needed him and he just hadn’t been there. She nodded, even though she knew he could easily rip her trust to shreds if she gave it to him, so she wasn’t going to risk her trust. Especially not when it came to her daughters. And yet what point would there be in saying all that? Why call him out and start something when they were both on edge and stressed?

  Vaughan loved his daughters. They adored him right back. That was important. That was what she always had to remember.

  This was about Maddie, who would undoubtedly benefit from having her dad around. And Kensey, too, because she’d be worried about her big sister, and her daddy would be around to make her feel better.

  “All right.”

  “Thank you.”

  CHAPTER TWO

  THE FOLLOWING DAY, Kelly really wondered just what the hell she’d been thinking when she’d invited all these people over. Her house nearly groaned at the seams with Hurleys. All Vaughan’s brothers were there and each of them had a woman along. Mary, Damien’s wife, was hugely pregnant and yet she’d moved through Kelly’s kitchen with ease, continuing to produce food at a rate that made Kelly begin to wonder if the other woman didn’t have one of those magic bags that Hermione had in the Harry Potter books.

  They all happily bustled through Kelly’s house, comfortable with one another. Even just a year before it would have made her feel lonely. So alone. But this place was hers. At one time she’d been far more comfortable on the other side of the camera, but in the years since she’d retired from the runway, she’d made herself at home taking photographs. The walls were covered in memories.

  Every pillow, picture, plate and towel existed as a sort of talisman for Kelly. A bit of magic that made her feel safe. This was her home, her heart. Even Sharon Hurley being in her kitchen wasn’t enough to shake that.

  Though it stung to see how warm Sharon Hurley was with everyone else’s women. Not once had the woman showed even a sliver of that toward her.

  A knife shaped like jealousy and doubt sliced through her, and Kelly ruthlessly pushed it aside. It didn’t matter. She left and that was that.

  Ross had recently left, taking his daughters along with him. His oldest had a piano lesson and after that, they had their weekly family dinner. At his ex-in-laws’ house. Yeah, that was sort of annoying. He still hung out with his ex-wife and her family weekly, but what could she say when her house was full of Hurleys?

  So, Kelly had urged him to keep their schedules. Things needed to get back to normal. And to be honest, she really needed to think about how much hostility Ross had shown—in private, of course—over Vaughan and his family being around so much. He thought their lifestyle was bad for the girls to be around.

  But that lifestyle was their world. Their dad was a musician. There was no getting around that. She didn’t want the girls to be ashamed or conflicted about it. It wasn’t Ross’s place and she pushed back but he didn’t like it much.

  Blended families could work. They did work. But if he continued to attempt to get between the girls and their father, it made success impossible.

  And damn if Vaughan wasn’t making it worse. He kept looking at her. Not in a where’s the food sense, like most people looked to one another in these situations. But an I like your boobs way.

  Their sexual chemistry had never dimmed. Ever. Years ago Kelly had accepted she would always burn for Vaughan. But aside from his general flirty behavior—he had always been like that—he tried to keep it light. He certainly didn’t stare at her as if he wanted to rub on her the way she’d caught him at a few times that day.

  When it was time to eat, he’d tried some monkey business, placing Kelly at the opposite end of the table from Ross but next to Vaughan. He’d put her in a corner and she didn’t like it one bit.

  So Kelly had picked up her things and headed down to sit with Ross and his girls. Vaughan was up to something and she had no idea what the hell it was. But she was not pleased that he’d manipulate her like that.

  But like so many things with Vaughan, she couldn’t call him out. Not in a crowded house. Not with his daughter around. There were always reasons and it normally just made her sad. But now? She was mad. And she’d take mad over sad. Yes, she would.

  Anyway, it was easier to resist him when she was mad.

  Kelly headed out a side door, into the backyard. She needed some alone time for just a few minutes so she sought the privacy, and chocolate, of the tree house.

  She’d made a nice little nest up here after the girls had gotten bored with the custom play space they’d begged for. Predictable, she knew. Why not make lemonade out of those lemons?

  Kelly settled in the low folding chair and pulled the pretty blue mason jar from the little built-in table.

  Inside, a sensual rainbow of delight. Chocolate bars of every type, wrapped in a variety of colors and textures. Pale lavender with silver writing, midnight blue with gold stars, the saffron yellow with bold green. All her favorites.

  Kelly looked to the tick marks on the inside of the lid and allowed herself to select the lavender. Salted caramel with almond. She made a quick note and closed the lid. Settling in with a sigh as she kicked off her sandals.

  She slid a fingertip down the seam, baring the glossy dark chocolate inside. Six squares.

  Snapping off two, she broke that in half again and that’s when Vaughan’s head popped in through the open hatch.

  He
started, clearly surprised to see her there. “Oh! Sorry.” He started to go. And she should have let him but instead, she called him back.

  “Is everything all right?”

  He popped in again. “Yes. I just...”

  “Needed some quiet?” Kelly asked.

  Relief flooded his face. “Yes.”

  She held the candy bar his way. “Come on, then. I have chocolate.”

  He gave her a look and settled in, criss-cross-applesauce style. He probably did yoga to move with such ease.

  She handed over a square of chocolate and popped the other into her mouth, not letting his presence ruin the luxury of that first taste. Yum.

  “Thanks for inviting my family over here. I know my mom can be...”

  Kelly held a hand up to stop him. “Nope. Not going there with you. We’re not married anymore and your children are nowhere in sight. I don’t have to be nice so whatever. I don’t want to talk about her. You were all worried about Maddie. You all got hungry. My house is here. Kensey is delighted to have her uncles and grandparents here. That’s all I need to care about.”

  “You’ve changed your tune.”

  Seriously, her chocolate Zen was really getting messed up by this. “Not really, Vaughan. This thing with your mom isn’t about me at all. It’s about you and I’m not paying for your sins. Not anymore.” She broke off two more squares, handing him one.

  “I guess that’s fair.”

  “You guess.” She snorted.

  He gave her a lopsided grin. “Did you take medication and sneak some wine?”

  “I wish. I’m drunk on indignation, I think. It’s the only kind of libation I can have until the only Hurleys in this house are me and Kensey.”

  “Why? No one is going to care.”

  “I can’t get sloppy when your mother is around. I never know when she might attack.” She hadn’t meant to say it, but once the words came out, she was glad she had.