Hold Onto Me_A Secret Baby Romance

by Juliana Conners

Some might say I have been on a lot of missions lately: I had just hooked up with a girl last night, who had been super into me. After it was done, she asked me for my autograph, and I thought, if that’s all she wants after that blowjob she just gave me, that’s a pretty good deal for me.

  But tonight, I was on the prowl yet again. And I didn’t think anyone could blame me. I hadn’t had an easy time of it lately, so I’d needed the release. I’d needed to find a random stranger to lose myself in for a little bit. Tonight, I need one bad. I just wasn’t sure I’d find one here.

  Batting Cage Sports Bar was exactly the kind of place I didn’t think any of the Florida Sharks football players would go for a night out. It wasn’t the nicest place I’ve been to—although the vibe was great and the alcohol was cheap—but Hanson and Brian insisted on going there.

  I didn’t really get a say though. Since I’d been traded from the San Antonio Bullriders back to the Sharks, I hadn’t been around the local nightclub scene much and didn’t know where else to suggest. So, Batting Cage it was.

  The place was overwhelmingly drab brown in color, with wooden tables and chairs with patent leather seats, raw brick walls, and television screens all around to watch whatever games were showing. Neon lights in the roof above the bar gave it a very distinct feel.

  But to my surprise, as soon as I sat down with the boys and we each had a beer in front of us, I began to feel glad that we had come to Batting Cage. We were among the public, the guys who came to watch our games, not the guys playing with or against us, and it made me feel normal for a change.

  God knew it had been a long time since I’d felt normal.

  I sipped my beer, slowly. We couldn’t get too drunk—we had training every day during the training season, and I had it worse than the others. I had been suspended for a full season, and my fitness wasn’t what it should have been. Getting suspended for your personal life becoming a public debacle makes you fucking despondent, which was exactly what I was.

  I had come to Miami hoping everything would be different. I had a bad name after I had assaulted another player during a game—what would you do if the other player told you he’d fucked your girlfriend?—and I’d been benched for the whole season. When it came time to get back into the game again, it had been easier for management to trade me off.

  Did I feel betrayed, rejected, replaced?

  Yes.

  But I got to come home. I had grown up just outside Miami. I’d studied at the University of Miami and played ball for them before the Bullriders had scouted me.

  Being back in Miami was supposed to feel better than it did, though. Instead of feeling like I was home again, I felt like an outsider, rejected by the team I was supposed to play with, shunned by all the football fans and without any friends left in the city after I’d been away for so long, and after everyone had branded me as a pariah for my past sins.

  I guess they expected me to come crawling back with my tail between my legs. But I wasn’t the crawling or begging type. I was more of the fist-pounding, “I am a successful football player, hear me roar” type.

  My stance had always been that my new teammates could take me—flaws and all—or leave me. So far, it seemed they had mostly chosen to leave me. Still, there was time for them to see the light.

  It was only training season. They had time to get to know me and love me before the real season started. Since people have told me I have a strange fucking charm about me, I was sure that my teammates would see it too. Not to mention that they’d see how I play on the field, which is like a total fucking legend.

  I looked at Brian and Hanson bantering back and forth over their beer. They were tight, and it was easy to tell. The two of them were the most well known duo on the team. The players all had friends, but I got the idea these two were really close outside of football as well. The kind of players that got together with their respective partners and had barbeques on weekends. Hanson was always talking about how much his wife Lacey loved Brian’s fiancée, Sadie.

  Although Brian and Hanson were good friends and seemed nice enough to me compared to other guys on the team, I wasn’t sure I could trust them. They’d invited me out, which was cool, but I still didn’t know where I stood with them. I didn’t know where I stood with any of them, and even sitting here, I didn’t feel like I was part of their team, part of their little party, part of anything at all.

  But I knew that if I was going to have any success—not to mention fun— continuing to play pro football, I’d have to make Brian, Hanson, and the whole team like me. And I had a feeling I could do it, too.

  “What do you think of the team so far?” Brian asked me.

  He was a running back and one of the star players of the team. Hanson was the quarterback.

  I nodded, taking a sip of my beer to give me a chance to think about it. I didn’t want to say something terrible to two of the most dedicated players on the team, but the truth was I didn’t feel like I fit in yet, and that made me uncomfortable.

  “It’s a great team, of course, and I’m so honored to be part of a team with statistics as good as the Sharks.”

  Hanson chuckled. “That’s a very diplomatic answer,” he said. “You having any trouble with the players on the team?”

  I shrugged. He’d seen right through me.

  “Not in particular,” I told him, truthfully. “But in general, well, I sense that no one much likes me, which is understandable at this point. I just need some time. To show everyone who I am and what I can do.”

  Hanson and Brian both nodded back at me.

  “I can tell you now,” Hanson said, “when your image takes a dip, the team turns away from you. It’s very hypocritical because we’ve all had bad press at one point or another, but it’s how it is. You just keep on keeping on, and you’ll be fine. Trust me.”

  “Yeah,” Brian added. “We’ve both had issues, and they were both about women. You’re lucky it’s not as complicated for you.”

  I took another sip of my beer and only nodded instead of answering. I didn’t want them to know the full story, that all the drama with the assault charge and the terrible violence on the field—something I’d done because I’d been defending my girlfriend at the time—had been grounded in the truth. She had fucked someone else while we were dating. And it had been that player.

  He hadn’t only gotten into my head, he’d gotten into Marisa’s pants as well.

  Go fucking figure.

  “Lacey was here to straighten me out,” Hanson said. “And the more she tried to fix me, the more trouble I got into. At some point, I thought I was going to lose everything because of women.”

  Brian nodded. “And now, they’re married, and they have a little boy together. It will turn around, trust me.”

  I smiled at them. “Thanks, guys.”

  I had to be polite, but I didn’t like talking about the women in their life. I knew, in general, what their scandals had been about. I’d read about that in the tabloids, just like everyone else.

  But I didn’t like talking about women. I had lost Marisa, not because I was a dick but because she had decided to find someone else’s. Not only had that resulted in my heart being ripped to shreds, but my image had been fucked and my career had been dented so badly, I didn’t know how much was left to save.

  I was happy that the guys were happy, obviously. Everyone deserves to be happy in love. But I wasn’t that guy. All I wanted was to fuck and be done with it.

  Speaking of which, I spotted a hottie at the bar. She kept glancing my direction. She had long, blond hair—impossibly long—and her eyes were a fresh green. I could imagine what it would feel like to have that hair fan all over my chest while she rode my cock, or to see those green eyes look up at me with her lips around it.

  She was curvy as hell—just like I like them—and I continued my fantasy, thinking about grabbing her hips and watching her ass bump up and down on my lap while I fucked her pussy until she was calling out my name. I was thinking t
he dirtiest thoughts about her that I possibly could. I was straight up objectifying her. But judging by the skirt she was wearing—something so short it could be a belt—and a top that showed more than enough cleavage, I was guessing she wasn’t exactly trying to win someone over with her personality.

  I couldn’t help but think she looked familiar. Where did I know her from? I figured she might be a rabid fan, following the team around to see where we hung out off hours. All the better, then. She’d be down to fuck.

  “Excuse me, guys,” I said. “I’m going to the bar.”

  Brian glanced at me and nodded. Hanson glanced over his shoulder and grinned. I’m glad they weren’t going to judge me. Now that they had both settled down, the only field they played was the football one. But I had an ocean full of fishes to catch.

  The girls in Miami were fine as hell—some of the cutest I’d seen anywhere—so I planned to continue catching and releasing them for the rest of my life, and not get tied down like Brian and Hanson did. I had had my shot at love, and hated myself for taking it, since it wasn’t worth the risk. I didn’t plan to make that mistake again, that was for sure.

  All I planned to do when it came to women was fuck them and forget them. And next up was this hottie who was ripe for the taking and sending me all the right signals.

  Hopefully she wouldn’t be too clingy afterwards. I fucking hated that. I just wanted to rip her clothes off, have my way with her, and never see her again.

  That was my standard MO, and I was about to implement it. Just like I was about to fuck this hot chick until she was weak in her knees, which I couldn’t help but notice were just as cute as the rest of her.

  Chapter 2 – Kina

  You’ll never guess where I am, I texted Lacey, my BFF since forever.

  You went out without me? She immediately texted back.

  You’re welcome to join me. To commiserate with me, actually. Tess dragged me out to a sports bar. She says it’s where all the guys are, so we should join them. But I’d prefer a girls’ night with you!

  Her response came in pretty quickly. I wish! Hanson is out with Brian so I’m at home in my PJs with Liam.

  “Awww, man,” I said, turning to my friend Tess and showing her Lacey’s text. Tess had been my friend for a while and she knew Lacey; sometimes we hung out all together but it’s harder now that Lacey had Liam. “The perks of motherhood.”

  “And the benefits of being single,” Tess added.

  She raised her margarita glass for a toast.

  “To perpetual singlehood,” she said.

  She was already slurring her words. I had lost count of how many margaritas she had been drinking. Guys just came up and bought us drinks all night long, which Tess had used as proof of the fact that her idea to come to a sports bar was a good idea. (“It’s full of guys, and they’ll all fall over themselves to buy drinks for the outnumbered lady.”)

  She was right. Her plan had worked and we were kept as liquored up as we desired. I didn’t down them nearly as quickly as Tess did, though, because I was a lightweight who didn’t drink very often.

  I toasted her with my glass, but scrunched up my face.

  “I don’t know,” I told her. “I do enjoy being single, but I’m going through a real dry spell. It’s been forever since I’ve… you know.”

  I couldn’t help but blush. I didn’t know why I was telling Tess this information. I guess I couldn’t hold it back any more. It was driving me crazy.

  “Why not?” she asked.

  “I don’t know. I haven’t had time to go on many dates, and whenever I do, they’re always a bust.”

  She shrugged.

  “Why do you have to go on a date?” she asked. “Just find a hot guy, and hook up with him.”

  I looked at her like she had two heads. “Are you serious?”

  “Sure,” she said. I noticed she was eyeing some guy in the corner. “I do it all the time. It’s the twenty-teens. Women are allowed to have lots of sex just like guys do, and no one can slut shame us for it.”

  She winked at the guy in the corner. I guessed she was about to demonstrate her affinity for hooking up with strangers.

  Tess thinks I should have a one night stand, I texted Lacey.

  I tapped my fingernails on the wooden table, waiting for Lacey’s response. I expected her to be critical, to talk some sense into me. Instead, I bent over my screen when I heard a text notification come in, to read what Lacey had written me back.

  Go for it! She said. One day you’ll be home with a baby like me, reminiscing about that time you fucked a hot guy in the bathroom stall.

  Leave it to Lacey to joke during a moment like this. She was joking, right? I wondered. I couldn’t tell. I turned to ask Tess her opinion of Lacey’s text but the guy had approached our table and was saying “How you doing?” with an obviously fake—and cheesy—New York accent.

  Come on, Tess, don’t fall for that, I silently willed her, but, the next thing I knew, his hand was on her thigh and her hand was on his shoulder. She was blinking at him as if something was stuck in her eye, but that was Tess’ way of flirting. Guys always thought it was adorable.

  “Kina, do you mind if I…”

  “Leave me in a bar all alone?” I asked her, smiling as if I was telling a joke. “No, go right ahead.”

  If she noticed that my tone was dripping with sarcasm, she chose to take my words at face value. Seeing as how she let the stranger wrap his arm around her and pull her off the bar stool, she was anxious to leave and was just glad I wasn’t protesting.

  “Okay, Love,” she said, kissing me on each cheek. “I really do think you should find a hookup buddy of your own. Try it! It’s fun! Trust me.”

  “Have fun,” I told her.

  As she wandered off, I looked around, considering whether there were even any options. My eye caught those of a guy who looked like he belonged on the cover of Sports Illustrated. Holy moly.

  The bar was dark and his table wasn’t very close to where I was sitting, so it was a bit hard to make him out, but he was definitely hot. Tall with broad shoulders and a chest that looked like it was made to carry things. He looked really familiar.

  He raised his eyebrows at me, and I squinted to make him out better. I found myself smiling at him despite myself.

  Woah.

  Was I really going to do this thing that Tess seriously recommend and Lacey at least jokingly endorsed? Was I going to hook up with a stranger?

  As he smiled back at me, I felt a sudden flash of recognition, in my gut more so than in my memory.

  Is that… Jacob Lawson?

  No, it couldn’t be. I hadn’t seen him since high school, when he was my twin brother Kyle’s best friend.

  Kyle and Jacob had played on the same football team back at the University of Miami and they had been close. Something had gone wrong between them when Jacob had been scouted while Kyle hadn’t, and they’d stopped talking.

  I did a double take, and looking slightly to one side of him, I noticed someone who looked an awful lot like Lacey’s husband Hanson.

  Looking down at my phone, I texted Lacey: Is Hanson at the Batting Cage?

  I didn’t have time to get an answer, though, because I noticed that the stranger was walking over to me. Correction: he was swaggering over to me. And what a swagger it was.

  As he got close to me, I noticed tattoos peeking out of his shirt, rising up to his neck, and also down on his wrist and hand. If it was Jacob Lawson, he certainly had become even more of a bad boy than he had been in high school. Which didn’t surprise me, because he was quite rebellious back then.

  Oh, how I used to fantasize about Jacob. He barely noticed I existed, though. I was just his best friend’s sister, and he was too busy playing football and chasing after cheerleaders to notice me. I was more of a band geek and academic nerd. My nose was always in a book and my head was always in the clouds, but sometimes I was thinking about him.

  How it would feel for him to kiss me
. “Feel me up,” as we used to say back then. I’d let him go to second base, maybe third. Maybe more.

  I would even touch myself in my bedroom late at night, thinking about how I had seen Jacob earlier when he had come over with Kyle. I would imagine him putting his hand up my skirt, sliding it closer to my aching pussy, fingering me, fucking me. I would play with myself while thinking about how it would feel for him to suck on my nipples and then my pussy. I would make myself come by thinking of him putting his cock inside me.

  And now, here he was, approaching my table.

  All sense left my head. I decided to give in to my baser instincts, like everyone had been encouraging me to do. I would have wild, dirty sex with this hot guy who—as he got closer, most definitely looked like Jacob Lawson—and then I would never see him again. I’d never tell anyone, especially my brother, who is upset and resentful at Jacob due to their falling out back in high school.

  I wasn’t sure what he was doing here in this bar, because he played for a team in Texas. Yes, I may have done some Internet stalking a while ago. Perhaps his team had training here, with the Sharks. That could be problematic, my brain told me, as he was almost within talking distance. Hanson might think I’m some slut, even though Tess claimed it was no longer acceptable to call me that.

  But I’m sure Lacey would straighten up his backwards thinking. Tonight was my time to stop thinking about what everyone else would think, and start thinking about what I wanted. It was obvious my panties were dripping wet, and my clenched pussy was sending me the clear signal of what I wanted: to sleep with this hot guy I used to know in high school, and then move on, feeling empowered after having my very first one night stand.

  Chapter 3 – Jacob

  I walked up to the bar and leaned against it next to cute-and-blonde. She glanced at me, doing a sweep from my feet upward before making eye contact. I loved to stare into her dark green eyes.

  “What’s a nice girl like you doing in a place like this?” I asked.

  She giggled. “Are you being serious?”