Slow Burn

by Sascha Illyvich

  Max shook his head, took a puff off the nub-sized cigar in his fingers, and set it in the ashtray beside him. He rested one elbow in his other hand and pinned Derrick with his stare. “Man, even your lover is no god.”

  “She’s not my lover,” he grumbled, but knew the words were a lie. Of course, they were lovers—just the fucked-up kind.

  “You sure about that? Because Sonja’s in my bathroom.” He shoved his thumb into Derrick’s chest for emphasis. “Choosing a life the same way you and I have.” He got up and cleared the distance. “Are you going to let her exclude you?”

  “I can’t stop her! It’s her life.”

  Max’s voice remained neutral. “No, not entirely. Don’t you remember what Erick said earlier?”

  Derrick inhaled sharply. The enigmatic elder puma in their local area had a lot of pull when it came to making things happen. No one really knew how old Erick was, but markings on his face and fur hinted at an age much older than he should be. “How could I forget? That guy has always been creepy and elusive.”

  Max nodded. “But he’s never led us astray. So you must be cautious and let her into your world.”

  “Easier said than done if you keep making choices for us.”

  “Look man, if you don’t choose first, then they’ll choose for her. And I already see the look on your face. You’re smitten with this one. I’m at least just doing my job.”

  Derrick took another sip of his whiskey and chose not to respond. If he did, he’d confirm what Max had stated. Or he’d punch him. Max wasn’t just doing his job; he had his own agenda with the agency and the shifters running ops, and he planned to push it at every chance.

  His body posture probably spoke for him anyway. The other puma had spent a great deal of time acquiring knowledge on the human psyche. Pumas weren’t that different.

  Derrick was no submissive, but he didn’t want leadership either. He was content with faking a solitary human existence.

  Except that the mere mention of Sonja made his heart race and he didn’t know why, other than perhaps the fact that she’d spent so much time in close quarters with him over the last few days.

  That had to be it.

  Then he realized that Sonja had already pinned him for pining after her the first time they slept together. “Fuck.”

  “Fuck indeed. How does the inner beast feel about her? You’re both equally enthralled.”

  “Can’t it just be her voice and magic?”

  “You mean calling to you like she is using power on you? Hardly. I’ve seen enough of her performances online to know she’s not that type. If you paid more attention to your natural instincts, you’d realize that the puma inside you is probably drawn to her.”

  Derrick spoke dryly. “I haven’t been laid in a long time.”

  “That doesn’t matter. You’ve always been picky. But Erick said this one is special and you really need to heed that, brother.”

  Derrick stiffened at that title. He hadn’t been a brother to anyone in years. Not since he left the pride after the death of their parents.

  By chance, he’d run into Max, his older brother, while visiting his favorite cigar lounge in California. The two had picked up conversation as though there had never been that ten years of separation.

  There had never been animosity. Only sadness from all the shit Derrick couldn’t handle properly at the age when he left home. Derrick grew tired of having to be the one to do everything. Responsibility had been thrown on his shoulders, and sadly, none of it could be helped because at the time of their parents’ deaths, Max had been in the hospital for an injury he’d acquired during some black ops mission.

  The bathroom door opened and in the doorway stood Sonja, unashamedly topless. The towel that hung off her luscious hips drew Derrick’s eyes there first, until they traveled up to her face. She pinned Derrick’s gaze with one of her own, an angry scowl across her face. “Come get me?”

  Derrick started for her, unable to think rationally with her standing hips tilted slightly to one side, arms raised on the doorframe. Her hair hung down in long streams of red, covering her breasts and emphasizing her pale skin. Plump lips formed a straight, angry line.

  He reached her, settled his hands on her hips, and his body hardened instantly.

  She tilted her head, still scowling at him.

  Derrick glared over his shoulder at Max. “He didn’t mean it like that. I’d never—”

  She held up a hand. “Stuff it, cat. I know you’d never do that. It’s all over your aura, along with your obvious lust.”

  “You do inspire that.” He nudged her hips with his.

  She sighed and slanted her head in the other direction. “But we have other business to tend to. Does your brother have any ideas about how we’re going to accomplish our goal?”

  “As long as we’re on the same side.” Derrick wanted to cover her with the rest of the towel and keep her naked body from Max’s view, but it wasn’t like pumas didn’t walk around naked on a regular basis. Many were more comfortable with being closer to the true nature of their species.

  Living among humans had flawed his mind slightly.

  Not like he hadn’t allowed it.

  “Yes.” She sighed, and the scowl from her face disappeared. She frowned now. “We’re on the same side.”

  Derrick cupped her chin and lifted her eyes. The depth of her emotions swam in the pools of her blue-silver irises. “You act as though it’s a bad thing.” She stiffened beneath his touch.

  “No, it’s not that.” She looked away. “It’s all the damage and death I cause. The fact is that in my voice, with the power I hold, I can convince the crowd to do what I want. But I suffer in the end for it, regardless of the outcome.”

  “You can control that. I can…” He took her hand and flattened it against his chest. “…help you.”

  Her eyes widened. “No!”

  Behind them, Max coughed. “Yes, actually. I’m afraid that for us to go forward, we’ll need you to cooperate with each other. Derrick will lead.”

  Derrick shuddered and his jaw ticked. He’d do this against his will for Sonja because protecting her was the right thing to do. Because in the end, his brother—hypocritical with his own love life as he was—had a valid point. Derrick’s heart had become involved, which for a spy, even an ex, was dangerous.

  An eyebrow lifted. Sonja’s expression softened. “Puma?”

  The way she said that one word spoke directly to the beast seeking control and leadership, not the man avoiding what he didn’t want. “Yeah, fine.”

  “I’ll remember that trigger,” she mouthed and her lips curled up in a grin.

  Damned if she didn’t look sexy standing before him with that cocky grin on her face. Derrick gritted his teeth and let out a hiss.

  Max continued. “You’ll set it up. We should be receiving a call sometime soon from our new friend on the phone I picked up for Derrick. He’ll give us the location and details. Until then, you both wait and rest.”

  Derrick turned and stared at Max. “Where are you going?”

  Max stroked the dark hair of his goatee and smiled. “I have some errands to run.” He winked and set his cigar on the ashtray. “You two have access to cash, use Derrick’s new credit card. And your new ID, Derrick, if you need to go out. Otherwise, I have food, tobacco, and alcohol here. Call me as soon as you hear from your unnamed contact.”

  Before Derrick could reply, Max grabbed his keys and cell, and slipped them into his pocket. “Keep a close eye on each other.”

  Behind him, Sonja made an unladylike noise.

  The large door opened and Max left, slamming it shut. It echoed with seeming finality.

  “I should get dressed.”

  Sonja’s voice cut through the silence left after the door shut. Derrick turned around to face her full on. “I’d rather you didn’t.”

  “I know.” She lowered her hands to her sides, gripping the towel. “But we can’t have sex until this stupid assho
le bear calls, supposing he will call.”

  “First off…” Derrick gave her a wicked grin. “Why not? And second, he’ll call.”

  Another brow arched up. “How do you know?”

  That bear, Slovich, was notorious for revenge. He hated being bossed around or threatened. And considering he thought Derrick, aka Tommy Derringer, was dead, had supposedly seen the death with his own eyes, he’d call. “I know his type. They’re always afraid, always watching their backs. What we did, what you instigated—”

  She punched a finger into his chest. “What you instigated.”

  He held up a hand. “What you would have done had I not intervened…” He paused. She said nothing but frowned harder at him. “…was get information from him. He’s going to want to know who we are, how we found out that things went down as they did, who set him up. He looked like he had money and he was pretty pissed that we interrupted their little party.”

  She nodded. “That he did. I bet you upset the little tramp standing off in the wings, too.”

  “Oh you noticed her, too, hmm?” Derrick crossed his arms over his chest.

  Sonja licked her lips. “If I were more inclined and less annoyed by their choice of clubs, I might have made a pass at her. And taken her from the bear.”

  Derrick chuckled. “You have spunk.”

  “I have to. In my business, I don’t have a choice. If I act too dead and Gothy, the kids think I’m fucking emo. If I act too serious, the message gets lost. So balance is the key, and in that balance is my ability to punch things up with my personality.”

  “No one would ever say you were boring.”

  “I didn’t hear you complaining.” She offered a wry grin that had his heart beating a little faster and his cock hardening.

  Derrick stepped closer, took her hands in his. “Why can’t we make love again?”

  Nonchalantly, she shrugged. “When did we make love the first time?”

  “Ouch.” He winced for show. “You’ve got a sharp tongue, too.”

  “I know. It’s—”

  “A self-defense mechanism. I know.”

  “Humans use them to hide mistakes. What do shifters use them for?”

  Flinching, Derrick shook his head. He needed to keep this light if he was planning on slaking their mutual lust for the sake of having sex, rather than the urgency of healing her. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  Her eyes twinkled very much like they did when she commanded the stage. Derrick braced himself for something, unaware of what would come his way.

  She took a step forward. “Is that why you hesitated when you told me about your relationship with Max? Because of some self-defense mechanism? Did you feel the need to atone for something by your behavior?”

  Derrick straightened to his full height and blinked. His body responded to her touch, but the shot she took at him hit him in the gut with the force of a large fist. He didn’t want to answer her question.

  Therefore, he didn’t. He could take up a leadership position if he wanted to. He could lead himself into…oh, who was he kidding. Derrick strode back into the kitchen and poured another whiskey. He took a swig, let the caramel and vanilla notes coat his palate. Then he turned back to face her.

  She made herself hard to ignore, especially when she used sex, not magic, to persuade him to open his mouth. The very feminine way she walked screamed woman more loudly than he’d seen since he’d met her. Certainly not the same type of girlish movements the lead singer of a death metal band would use, but then again, he wasn’t a typical puma.

  He did his best to keep his pulse even and his mind clear of nonsense. Drawing in a deep breath, he held it, let it out, then repeated the motion a second and third time. “There is and has always been a shifter war.” His mouth went dry as she took another step forward, the towel parting just enough to show the pale flesh of her thigh. His eyes remained fixed on the way she walked. “A very bad shifter has it in for humans, just as the Anti-Shifter League has it in for us.”

  People died when Derrick controlled more than just his actions. His brother ended up missing, only to turn up in a hospital in some Middle Eastern country where they had to send in a bomber to get him out. Other shifters died. And Derrick blamed himself. But he couldn’t share that with Sonja. She already had enough darkness in her life.

  She continued walking toward him, now with her hands on her hips.

  What was she doing?

  “Tell me more.” Power tinged with sanguine sweetness flowed from her voice. It coated Derrick like a warm blanket or the cool side of a pillow at night.

  He looked askance at her. The wave of power increased, forcing him to fight for control over his focus and his words. “What are you doing to me, Sonja?”

  “Helping you,” she mouthed. “Continue.”

  Her eyes changed color, softened, and that intense silver of her irises almost glowed.

  Her hands now covered his.

  He didn’t want help. As a puma, a shifter, he could handle his own life. Derrick set the drink down on the marble countertop. “What are you doing?” His body shook and he fought the urge to spill his secrets to her.

  “You’re going to have to learn,” she whispered, “that this has to be done a certain way. We’re…” Her voice dropped lower. “Mated.”

  Eyes widened, he gasped. “Mated.” He said the one word as though it held all the power in the world and all those who heard it understood its meaning. It bound them together indefinitely as soul mates. What one felt, the other would, too. What went on between them, only they could share, but others could use the knowledge against one or the other.

  He had no idea how it worked with humans. “How do you know?”

  She touched her forehead with the tip of her finger. “Remember, I’m a witch.”

  “That doesn’t mean anything. I’m a puma. I shift into a carnivorous beast at will. I don’t have precognitive powers.”

  Her lip twitched.

  He found the gesture sexy despite the look on her face.

  “Are you rejecting me?”

  “Never.” He stepped into her. Wrapping his arms around her was dangerous, but he did just say something stupid. Witch or not, she still possessed feelings that mattered to him. Her emotions had always been easy to read.

  Awareness of her distraction techniques reeled in his mind. She wanted to run off and play hero, keeping him and Max out of real danger. He didn’t need to be precognitive to know that, her gestures, her words said it all.

  He couldn’t fathom the thought that what she considered dangerous might be a walk in the park for a former spy and CIA operative. Perhaps… “So what does this mean?”

  Her arms slid around his neck and pulled his mouth to hers. “It means…” She ran her tongue over his lower lip. “That we’re bound together for life.”

  Bound? The words his father said echoed in his head, but he thought knocked up at the time meant he’d get some woman pregnant. Was Sonja? He shook the thought from his head. They’d had unprotected sex a few times now and they couldn’t trade sexual diseases but she could still end up giving him a hybrid baby. The thought made him shudder until her hands roamed up and down his shoulders as she leaned in for another kiss.

  He pulled back, flicked his tongue out to taste her. “But you don’t want this.”

  Her eyes went wide. “How can you?”

  He smirked. How could he not want her? In the end, the thing that mattered most was protecting Sonja and keeping her safe. The emotions may be new but the desire wasn’t hard to fathom, it felt familiar. Jealousy over another man touching her like this reared its head and pissed off his beast. Derrick shook off the feeling. “I don’t know entirely. I just know that I feel it strongly.” His voice held notes of emotion and he had to wonder for a moment whether he had let go too fast for her.

  Her fingers tightened in his hair. “You’d just accept it then?”

  He flattened his lips together in a thin line. He wa
sn’t sure he could, not with his past, not with the dangers facing him. Sure, he was on the do-not-touch list but that didn’t always matter. Sonja hesitated in asking the question and he couldn’t afford that, not with his emotions running so high now. “I hear the doubt in your voice. You’re the one not accepting of what could be truth.”

  She cocked her head, obviously thinking for a moment about her response. The flow of power slowed. “Yet you use those word choices.”

  He pressed his lips into hers, shutting her up.

  Her body tensed against his, breasts pressed into his chest. The power began spilling into him at an accelerated rate, adding to his heated arousal.

  He ran a hand along the small of her back until he cupped her ass and gave her a squeeze.

  She murmured sweet nothings beneath the kiss.

  He slanted his mouth over hers for better access and then thrust his tongue between her plump lips. If she wasn’t going to play fair, then neither was he.

  The other hand circled around her bicep, effectively pinning her to him.

  He hardened beneath her, smelled her scent, and it drove him wild with desire.

  Still the calmness in him kept lust at bay long enough for him to focus on his goal of distracting her from whatever she was doing.

  The towel slid from her hip to the floor and exposed more skin.

  So much for distracting. Derrick grabbed a handful of her bare ass. He deepened the kiss, biting her mouth, sucking on her lower lip.

  She rocked against him gently, threw one leg around his waist, and pulled herself into him.

  Her heat rubbed against his jean-clad thigh, stealing his concentration completely. Derrick didn’t want to do it this way, he wanted unbridled passion, not forced mating because somehow they both bore a mark. Derrick wanted…he blinked, broke the kiss, and ran a hand through the flow of her hair, all while finding himself slowly getting lost in her now silver-blue eyes.

  She clutched at his dark hair, trying for control of the kiss.

  Power swirled around them.

  Neither could get the upper hand magically.

  Derrick had superior physical strength over her.

  The softness she wielded over him felt more like…great concern.