by Fanny Parkes
Everything necessary for the use of a native lady is sent on such an occasion and these articles are provided for years: head and heel ropes for the horses, and even wooden pegs to secure them, and the bullocks, are sent with the lady, that nothing may be wanting.
The Prince took his bride to his tents, and a remarkable ceremony was there witnessed by Mr Vigne, which he thus relates:
‘I was admitted, as a great favour, to see a custom peculiar, I believe, to the Timūrians, and which perhaps no European ever saw before. Immediately after the marriage ceremony the bridegroom has the bride taken to his home; but before she quitted her palanquin, which was set down close to it, she thrust her bared foot – a very pretty one, and dyed with henna at the extremities – through the sliding doors and the bridegroom touched her great toe with the blood of a goat, which I saw him kill with his own hands, whilst yet in his bridal dress and turban, by then and there cutting its throat. When this was done, the bride withdrew her foot and I made my bow, and the bride and bridegroom retired to their inner apartments.’
By the time the procession had quitted the gates of the zenāna, I was very glad to return to my own rooms to bathe preparatory to breakfast. I had eaten nothing during the night but cardamums and prepared betel-nut: had smoked a little of Colonel Gardner’s huqqa, and had drank nothing but tea. Mr Gardner prepared some pān for me in a particular fashion: I ate it and found it very refreshing. Pān, so universally eaten in India, is made of the leaf of the piper betel, a species of pepper plant, called pān supéarie and betel-nut; but this betel-nut is not the nut of the piper betel, but of the Areca catechu, a palm fifty feet in height. The betel-nut is cut up in small bits and wrapped up in the pān-leaf with lime cuttie, which is a bitter gum resin, an astringent vegetable extract, the produce of a species of mimosa (chadira Catechu japonica); called kuth by the natives, and some slaked lime, or chunā. Pān at marriage feasts is tied up in packets of a triangular shape, and covered with gold and silver leaf and enamelled foil of bright colours: the lime cuttie dyes the gums and tongue a deep red.
I was quite fresh and free from headache: had I sat up all night in England, where we eat supper, it would have made me ill. Colonel Gardner came in to breakfast, and kissing me on the forehead, said, ‘Mera betī (my child), you are less fatigued than anyone.’ The Prince lived with his bride at the tents for three days, after which they returned to Colonel Gardner’s to perform the final ceremony of playing the chāotree.
CHAPTER XXXVII
THE CHĀOTREE
ONE SNAKE HAS BIT THEM ALL
THE PRINCESS HAS GROWN FOOLISH, SHE PELTS HER OWN RELATIONS WITH SWEETMEATS, OTHERS WITH STONES
THEY HAVE SCATTERED DATURA (THORN APPLE) IN THE AIR
i.e. the people are all gone mad.
APRIL 2ND 1835 – The chāotree was to be played this day, it being the finale of the wedding. When the Prince and Shubbeah arrived at Khasganj they came into the zenāna and were seated on the gaddī; a large number of trays, containing fruits and vegetables of every description fresh from the garden, were placed before them, with sugar, etc. Shubbeah had divested herself of her bridal attire, and wore the peshwāz, the court dress of Delhi, which was made of Benares tissue of gold and silver, and she wore all her jewels. Nine fruits of different sorts were wrapped in a cloth and suspended round her waist by her attendants; it had a curious effect, because the whole was placed beneath her garments; she arose, encumbered with these fruits, and made salam to each of the four corners of the room. Her hair was then decked with natural flowers, her face having previously been covered with silver dust, and she and the Prince were both fed with sugar off a rupee. A stick ornamented with silver tissue was given to him, and another to her, with which they pretended to beat each other; these silver wands were presented to all the ladies, and wands covered with flowers were given to the slaves. For some days before the chāotree, the begum had been employed in teaching the ladies in the zenāna and the slave girls a particular dance, the ancient Princess herself dancing with them with a silver wand in her hand. I mentioned this to Colonel Gardner; he said, ‘It is very remarkable that, at weddings, all the ladies of this family perform this particular nāch, but at no other time do they dance; it would lower their dignity. This is an old Tartar dance and always performed at weddings amongst the Timūrians; it is the dasturi. The tamāshā consisted in beating each other with these silver sticks, and throwing handfuls of fruits, of turnips, of oranges, of pomegranates, in fact, anything that could be seized from the trays, at each other; the slaves joining in the fun, breaking the glass windows by accident, and doing much damage. The more you pelt a person, the greater the compliment; sharp jealousy was created in many a breast this day, the source of much anxiety afterwards. This is called playing the chāotree, and finishes the ceremonies of the wedding.
Soon after, a woman came in with a large basket full of chūrīs for the arms (bracelets), which were made of rings of glass, ornamented with beads. Everybody at the wedding, from the begum to the youngest slave, had chūrīs put on their arms; I was also decorated. These rings are extremely small; to put them on requires considerable art, it being necessary to mull the hand and render it very pliant before it can pass through so very small a circumference as that of the churi.
Thus ended the wedding of Prince Unjun Sheko and Shubbeah Begum. They quitted their tents and went to reside at a pretty little fort and indigo factory, the property of Colonel Gardner, at Moreechee.
The dūlhan (bride) visits her mother on the four first Fridays after her marriage, on each of which the dūlhā (bridegroom) is bribed with a full suit.
‘A marriage may be celebrated with a mŭn of rice as well as a mŭn of pearls.’
Another wedding immediately began, that of Jhanee Khanum, an adopted daughter of Colonel Gardner’s, a slave girl; but I did not stay to witness it, having before seen the grand display.
It is the custom in the zenāna for every young lady to adopt the child of a slave, which serves as a doll, an amusement for her. Shubbeah had an adopted child, for whom she will have eventually to provide; and every lady in the zenāna had an adopted daughter of the same description. The slaves are a set of the most idle, insolent, good-tempered, thievish, laughing girls I ever saw. I should think, counting babies, slaves and all, there must have been two hundred souls within the four walls of Colonel Gardner’s zenāna.
The prince allowed his brothers to see the bride the day of the wedding, but said he should not allow them to see her in future. A native woman thinks this sort of jealousy very flattering, and prides herself upon it.
The mother of Shubbeah was the happiest of the happy: in her idea, her child had made the finest match in the world, by marrying a prince of the house of Delhi, although she was brought up a Christian, he a follower of the prophet. Her other daughter was happily married, her husband being very fond of native life and native customs.
At noon all the slave girls came for their dinners; each was given a great chapatī (cake of flour) as large as a plate, and this was filled brim full from two great vessels of curry and rice. This repast took place again at eight in the evening. One day, just as they were beginning their meal, I sat down in the verandah and played an Hindustani air on a sitar; up started all the slaves in an instant and set to, dancing with their food in their hands and their mouths full. Each slave girl carried her curry and rice on the wheaten cake which was about the size of a plate, and used it as such; until having eaten the contents she finished with the cake. In spite of their dexterity in putting the food down their throats without dropping the rice or soiling their dresses, the fingers retain a considerable portion of the yellow turmeric and the greasy ghee! They eat custards, rice, and milk, and more fluid food with the hand, sucking the fingers to clean them, and afterwards wipe them dry with a chapātī! They were merry, and fat, and happy, unless the begum happened to catch one out in a theft, when the other girls punished her. Some of the slaves were pretty girls and great favourites. To
show how little they had to do, the following anecdote may suffice. A pretty slave girl was sitting by my bedside; I held out my hand, and desired her to shampoo it: the girl’s countenance became clouded, and she did not offer to do it – her name was Tara (the Star). ‘Why do you not mull my hand, Tara?’ said I. ‘Oh,’ she replied, ‘I never mull the hand; the other girls do that; I only mull the Colonel Sāhib’s eyebrows. I can take the pain from them when he is ill – that is my duty. I will not shampoo the hand.’ I laughed at her description of the work that fell to her lot as a slave, and said, ‘Well, Tara, mull my eyebrows; my head aches;’ with the greatest good-humour she complied, and certainly charmed away the pain. It is the great luxury of the East.
I might have lived fifty years in India and never have seen a native wedding. It is hardly possible for a European lady to be present at one. Alaida and her sister the Evening Star learnt to read and write Persian; a very old moonshee was allowed to teach them. Musulmān ladies generally forget their learning when they grow up, or they neglect it. Everything that passes without the four walls is reported to them by their spies: never was any place so full of intrigue, scandal, and chit-chat as a zenāna. Making up marriages is their great delight, and the bustle attendant on the ceremonies. They dote upon their children, and are so selfish they will not part from them to allow them to go to school, if it be possible to avoid it. The girls, of course, never quit the zenāna. Within the four walls surrounding the zenāna at Khasganj is a pretty garden with a summer-house in the centre; fountains play before it, and they are fond of spending their time out of doors. During the rains they take great delight in swinging under the large trees in the open air. They never ride on horseback, or go on the water for pleasure. They are very fond of atr of all sorts, the scent of which is overpowering in their houses. They put scented oil on their hair; to eau-de-Cologne and lavender-water they have the greatest aversion, declaring it to be gin, to drink! The prophet forbade all fermented liquors, after a battle which he nearly lost by his soldiers getting drunk, and being surprised.
The old begum said to Colonel Gardner, ‘They are curious creatures, these English ladies; I cannot understand them or their ways – their ways are so odd!’ And yet the begum must have seen so many European ladies, I wonder she had not become more reconciled to our odd ways.
The conduct that shocked them was our dining with men not our relations, and that too with uncovered faces. A lady going out on horseback is monstrous. They could not comprehend my galloping about on that great English horse just where I pleased, with one or two gentlemen and the coachman as my attendants. My not being afraid to sleep in the dark without having half a dozen slave girls snoring around me surprised them. My remaining alone writing in my own room; in not being unhappy when I was alone – in fact, they looked upon me as a very odd creature. It was almost impossible to enjoy solitude, the slave girls were peeping under the corner of every parda. Someone or other was always coming to talk to me, sometimes asking me to make up a marriage! If a native lady is relating a story, and you look incredulous, she exclaims. ‘I swear to God it is true.’ They are very fond of this exclamation. One day, in the gardens, I was talking to Tara the pretty slave girl, when she darted away over the poppy beds, screaming out, ‘I swear to God there is a ripe poppy-head! and she came back with her ripe poppy-head, out of which she beat the seeds on the palm of her hand, and ate them. She then brought some more for me, which I ate in her fashion. The half-ripe seeds of the poppy eaten raw, and fresh gathered, are like almonds; they do not intoxicate. ‘Remember,’ said Tara, ‘after dinner you shall have a dish sent you; partake of it, you will like it.’ It is made thus; gather three or four young poppy-heads when they are full of opium, and green; split each head into four parts, fry them in a little butter, a very little, only just enough to fry them, with some pepper and salt – send them to table, with the dessert. The flavour is very pleasant, and if you only eat enough, you will become as tipsy as a mortal may desire. We had them often at Colonel Gardner’s; and I have felt rather sleepy from eating them. The old nawāb was in his glory when he had two or three spoonfuls of these poppy heads in his plate, one of which is a good dose. I was so fond of the unripe seeds that I never went into the garden, but the mālī brought me ten or twelve heads, which I usually finished at once. There were some beds of the double red poppy, especially set apart for the begum, the opium from that poppy being reckoned the finest; a couple of lumps of opium were collected and brought in daily. Colonel Gardner said to me, ‘The begum is perplexed; she wants to know how you, a married woman, can have received the gift of a nose-ring from a gentleman not your husband? She says the nose-ring is the bridal ring. She is perplexed.’ I had differed in opinion with a gentleman: he said, ‘I will bet you a nose-ring you are in the wrong.’ The native jewellers had been at the house that morning showing their nose-rings and other native ornaments. I accepted the bet, and was victorious: the gentleman presented me with a nose-ring, which I declined, because its value was Rs 160, i.e. £16. ‘I will accept the n’hut I have won, but it must be one from the bazaar, which will be an exact imitation of this ring and will cost one rupee and a half.’ It was accordingly procured for me. The begum having heard this story was perplexed until it was explained to her that I was not going to marry the gentleman, and had only accepted the nose-ring to make a native dress perfect.
Three of the slave girls, wishing to see the world I supposed went to the begum and asked her to give them to me. She laughed and told me their request.
Science has not yet entered the confines of the zenāna; nature and superstition reign supreme; nevertheless, native women suffer less on the birth of a child than the women of Europe. The first nourishment given an infant medicinally is composed of umaltass (cassia fistula) sugar, aniseed water, and russote, from a colt just born! Native women do not approve of flannel for infants, thinking it excites the skin too much.
I remember the following remark by Colonel Gardner – ‘Nothing can exceed the quarrels that go on in a zenāna, or the complaints the begums make against each other; a common complaint is, such an one has been practising witchcraft against me.’
[ … ]
Sons are of inestimable value; the birth of a daughter is almost a calamity; but even the mother blest with a son is not likely to remain long without a rival in the heart of her husband, since ninety-nine out of a hundred take new wives: besides the concubines given by the mother before marriage!
When a Mohammedan has sworn to separate himself from his wife, she retires to her own apartments and does not behold her husband for four months; if they are not reconciled by the end of that time, all their ties are broken; the woman recovers her liberty and receives, on quitting the house, the property settled on her by the contract of marriage. The girls follow the mother, the boys remain with the father. The husband cannot send her from his house until the expiration of the four months.
One day Colonel Gardner was ill; he was in the large garden without. The begum begged me to go to him; she dared not leave the zenāna, even to assist her husband who was so ill that his attendants had run in for aid! I went to him. After a time he was better and wished to return to the house; he leaned on my shoulder for support and led the way to the burial-ground of his son Allan, just without the garden. He sat down on a tomb, and we had a long conversation: ‘If it were not for old age, and the illness it brings on,’ said he, ‘we should never be prepared, never ready to leave this world. I shall not last long; I shall not see you again, my betī; I wish to be buried by the side of my son; but I have spoken to James about it. The poor begum, she will not survive me long; mark my words – she will not say much, but she will take my death to heart, she will not long survive me: when her son Allan died she pounded her jewels in a mortar.’ Shortly afterwards we returned to the house.
It may appear extraordinary to a European lady that the begum, in her affliction, should have pounded her jewels in a mortar: ornaments are put aside in times of mournin
g, and jewellery with native ladies is highly prized, not merely for its own sake – that of adding to their beauty, but as a proof of the estimation in which they are held by their husbands. If a man be angry with his wife, he will take away her jewels and not allow her to wear them; if pleased, it is his delight to cover her with the most valuable ornaments, precious stones set in pure gold. The quantity and value of the jewellery thus ascertains the rank to which a lady is entitled in this sort of domestic ‘Order of Merit’; the women pride themselves upon this adornment, and delight in jewellery as much as the men of England in stars and garters.
A lady wears slippers only out of doors, and puts them off on entering the house; the slippers are of various forms and patterns; some of them are square at the toes and have iron heels. ‘She combs his head with the iron heel of her slipper,’ is applied to a woman who domineers over her husband. The slippers for the ladies are of cloth of the gayest colours, ornamented with embroidery of gold and silver, adorned with seed pearls and with beetle wings, which are worked into flowers upon the cloth, and cover the long peak that turns up over the toes.
Stockings are never worn; but I have seen little coloured socks, made of the wool of Kashmir, worn at times during the cold season. The ankles of a native lady are decorated with massive rings, called kurrā; those worn by the begum were of gold, thickly studded with jewels; the ladies had them of solid embossed gold; and for the slaves, they were of solid silver. These rings are generally hexagonal or octagonal, of an equal thickness throughout, and terminated by a knob at each end. The gold or the silver of which they are composed being pure metal, they may be opened sufficiently to be put on or off at pleasure; the ends being brought together by the pressure of the hand.