by A. M Martin
Aden slips in beside Cam as all four guys stand in a row, looking out at a very scared Avery and the mighty black wolf.
"Is it working?" Aden asks.
"I don’t know. I can’t feel anything." Cam grunts out in frustration, eyes on the pair in the yard.
I reach out for the handle getting ready to rip open the door at the helpless look Avery sends over her shoulder.
"Don't." Cam grabs my wide wrist. "You can’t. Not yet."
My teeth lengthen and sharpen as I fight with the wolf inside. Both man and wolf want to put a stop to this. Get Avery away from Dean. I pause, taking in a deep breath, letting the rational part of my mind rule.
My hand drops from the handle causing Cam’s hand to fall from my wrist. Is this the right thing to do?
"This is a good thing Kayden. For Dean. For the pack." Aden speaks out.
I know this is the best for Dean and the pack. But it’s also something unknown. Avery is unknown. No one really knows what’s going to happen. Avery has already changed so much of what they thought they knew. Is this good for her and me?
An empath has never formed a mate bond with a Wolf nor has a female had ever lived past birth with both empath and wolf blood in their veins. Everything is so different. How will this affect Avery and me plus Dean getting thrown into the mix?
"Ahh." Avery’s fearful yell has my heart thundering and me latching onto the door handle in a matter of seconds. Hands wrap around my arms pulling me back and away from the door. I snarl and growl. My skin ripples and rolls from my wolf wanting out. To protect. To defend.
"Stop it,” Nick grunts out as I struggle to rip Aden and Nick off of my arms.
"Calm down and look!" Cam shouts over the snarling.
I freeze, my chest moving up and down in a frenzied movement and look back out the glass doors. My heart stops, and my muscles loosen out.
The guys let go, and I move closer to the door. My nose is touching the glass. Dean’s massive head lays on Avery’s thigh. A growl forms. I can’t help it. Dean is so close to what is supposed to be mine.
My heart fractures a tiny bit as I watch Avery’s small hand run through Dean's fur. Would she ever do that to me?
"That’s good, right?" Nick questions, looking at Cam.
"Yeah." Cam has a big smile on his face.
It’s for the best I guess. I need to let this happen no matter how bad it hurts me. How bad it steals my breath and cracks my heart.
"Now what?" Aden says.
With a deep breath, Cam says, “Now I go out there. Hopefully, Dean doesn’t take me as a threat, and I coach Avery on the next steps."
"Well, you better do it now, I think she’s falling asleep." Nick chuckles.
It burns me to my very core seeing how comfortable Avery is with Dean. Is it because Dean looks like a wolf and I look human? Would she be more comfortable with me if I had fur and claws?
"Yeah." Cam sighs.
"Where are, you going?" Nick asks as he sees his brother leaving.
"I can’t watch this any longer,” I grunt out not stopping.
I know it’s for the best. That this should happen. I don’t need to watch it happen. I can’t. With a sickening feeling in my gut, I leave the house. Will this change things?
Avery
"Avery." Cam’s whispered voice pulls me awake and out of Dean’s relaxing emotions.
My body tenses up once more with the huge black wolf laying on me. Ah. Why did I fall asleep? What is wrong with me? I’m mental. That’s what it is. Only a mental person would fall asleep next to a four-hundred-pound wolf.
I look down at the massive head on my thigh and jerk. Oh, no no no. His hackles are up in a silent warning. Showing red gums and long white sharp teeth, a lot of teeth. Copper eyes fixated behind me. I slowly turn my head.
Cam has the sliding glass doors open an inch barely. Chicken.
"Yeah?" My voice comes out soft and unsure.
Shit. Is he going to attack me?
"Stand up and move back a little bit. I’ll come out."
I nod. Not understanding why I need to do either of those things. I think the safe thing to do is not to move. But I would very much like to get away now that my fear is starting to brim back over.
To know how to do it is the question. Do I just go to get up? Push his two-ton head off my thigh? Ask? Would he even understand what I mean?
"Umm, Dean I need up?" I say softly; my chin tucked into my chest. Please don’t go for my throat.
Cam said he’s intelligent. Asking should do the trick.
Dean shifts, looking back at me. A question in his glowing copper eyes. I don’t know what to do really. I’m going with my gut now. Hopefully, it leads me true.
Dean looks back up at Cam, and a low growl rumbles from his chest as he stands up. Well, Cam’s been warned. What about who knows. For heaven’s sake, it’s a wolf. There could be several things he said in that growl.
I climb slowly to my feet, wincing at the needle feeling of blood flowing back into my legs. The fear is still there, but it’s not boiling over yet. I guess
I’m getting used to being around him.
I shuffle back about a foot from the patio. Chewing on my nails. A bad habit, but one I discovered I do when I’m nervous.
"Alright now what?" I ask looking at a pale Cam.
He chuckles nervously, “I’m going to come out, and we’ll work on the next steps."
Alrighty. I shift from foot to foot- watching Dean watching Cam. I can see all the tense muscles running through Dean’s broad back. His head goes down as Cam moves to the edge of the patio, stiff as can be. Will Dean attack him? Oh, my gosh, what am I to do if he does? How am I to stop the wolf?
"Nervous Cam?" My lips twist into a mocking smile. Serves him right after what I just went through. Leaving me out here by myself. Locking the damn door. Getting sniffed up by a wolf.
"Yeah, just a little."
Dean sits down slightly in front of me. It’s like he’s guarding me against Cam which is silly. The only threat here is Dean. He’s the one with the sharp teeth and claws.
"Alright. Have you felt the bond connecting you and Dean?"
"I think." I really don’t know. This is all so very Twilight Zone.
"Good enough. This isn’t going to be pleasant for you or him when he starts to transition back. Hell, it might not even work right away." Cam mumbles looking at Dean.
My hand goes up to a loose piece of hair with the not pleasant part. Twisting the hair around my fingers. It’s another nervous habit of mine back before I lost everything. It seems something’s stay the same.
"I need you to push out the emotions. Your human ones through the bond. You need to imagine being human. The human face, body. Things like that."
"Um. What kind of emotions?"
I thought all and any emotion would be considered human, but I guess not.
Who knew.
"Like sadness. Joy. Love. Shy. Loss. Even jealousy. Things like that."
Alright, whatever. Still, doesn’t make a lot of sense. Animals feel things too probably more than people I’m guessing.
I close my eyes and picture a human body. Arms, legs, hands, feet, body. I let everything build and build up till tears stream down my face, and my breathing becomes panicky gasps. I reach out to that dark spot in my mind, I’ve associated with Dean. I hope that’s our link anyways. I start to push those things down through to that spot. A line starts to spider web away from me and out towards Dean. There’s a burnt red glow along the lines. I watch it as the colors move further from me and closer to Dean. There’s a confused snarl followed by a horrific howl has my concentration snapping and me stumbling backward on weak legs.
Crap that scared me. My eyes snap open locking onto the massive black wolf laying on its side panting for breath. My hand comes up all on its own as I step forward. Towards Dean. Is he okay?
"Avery don’t. Just keep going."
Cam’s serious tone stops me in my jerky tr
acks. I look at the patio and see that Aden and Nick have joined us outside. Still no Kayden though. He should be here with me. Why did he leave?
"But..." It hangs there in the open air. I hurt Dean. Whatever I did damaged him badly.
"He told you it wouldn’t be pleasant. Whatever you hear do not stop. You have to keep going no matter what." Aden says softly. The sorrow in his voice even has me hurting for him.
I nod and move back.
Eyes close. I find the dark link and start pushing as much as I can. Love. Loss. Grief. It comes in waves after waves. Tiny glowing balls of yellow follow down our link. It has my knees knocking together. I picture the body next. A human head, feet, legs, arms, hands, torso. I pull more from inside my core that I didn’t even realize was there. My need for him to change. To shift. To be human once again.
Hurt. Guilt. Love. Fear. Shame. Joy.
It blasts through me and into the burnt red link bringing me to my knees on the hard-grassy ground. Leaving me breathless. My heart is banging against my ribs.
An agonizing howl rents the air sending the tiny hairs on my body to attention. I gasp and shake as the sound of breaking bones reach my ears.
Dean.
He’s hurting, and it’s my fault. I almost stop but remember the sorrow in Aden’s voice. The seriousness in Cams’. I can’t stop. It’s not right for a wolf to be stuck in the rage and I’m the only thing to bring him out of it. To bring his humanity back.
Tears flow out of my eyes. I push harder, my body shaking as I catch myself with my hands as I fall forwards onto the ground. My head hangs down, my neck too weak to hold it up. My breathing is fast and uneven. Stars dance behind my eyelids.
The howls turn into growls mixed with tortured whines. More bones break and snap. Grinding together. Echoing out across the yard. I cringe at the noise. It sounds like a baseball ball bat hitting the concrete at full force. Over and over. The sound rings out louder than the devastating whines. The pain he must be going through. I couldn’t imagine what that would be like. And the confusion. How does he even know what’s going on? I should have talked to him. Told him what I was going to try and do. Instead of him thinking invisible hands are tearing him apart.
I’m panting. On the verge of passing out when a very human scream fills the air. That has my body jerking from the pain fueled sound.
"Avery stop. It’s done."
Done. I’m done. I did it. I let go of our shared connection. I feel a small smile form on my lips as my shuddering arms give out and I hit the ground with a hard thud. My labored pants mix with more pain filled whines and grunts that sound more human than animal as I lose the last of my consciousness.
Dean
She called out to him. Her voice ringing in his ears sweet and full of desperation and fear.
Why? It wonders through his mind as he watches the two-legged female with the two-legged male that came from that thing past the grass. A den maybe. Dean doesn’t know. Doesn’t remember a lot of things he knows he should.
He doesn’t like the two-legged male who made the female move. Dean was comfortable laying on her. He felt sleepy, and she was soft.
His lips peel back wanting to snarl. He doesn’t know if it will spook the funnily shaped female who called out to him. He doesn’t like the sour smell of her fear coating her winter scent.
Mid-chase. Almost had the fat rabbit.
His mouth starts to water at the thought of his snack being disturbed. She called. He will always answer her call even if it meant no rabbit.
The two-legged female that brings a want raging through his blood. The one that smells cold and fresh. Like a first snow.
His big head cocks watching the female. His ears flicker listing to the funny sounds she makes.
He growls as the pain hits his body. His muscles quiver.
Why? I am not tired. Who hurts me?
He grunts and growls as the feelings come.
What is this?
Guilt. Love. Worry. Lonely. Fear.
They hit him like a battering ram knocking him down on the ground. Taking his air.
He doesn’t understand these feeling. Why they hurt so much. His muscular body shakes from the pain.
Lonely. I have been lonely. Lost. Always looking for something. No more. She will keep the lonely at bay.
His body withers on the ground as the feelings pound and pounds on him. In him. His strong bones are snapping and reshaping.
His snarls soon turn into screams. He jerks at the odd sound coming from his snout.
What a weird noise.
He snaps at the air. Looking for the enemy. He whimpers and whines as something forces his body to break. To change. One last scream flies free, and he’s on hands and knees. Panting hard at the pain. The confusion is coursing through his drained body.
What am I?
His eyes are glued to the strange pale things where his paws and claws used to be.
Hands. Fingers.
The thought comes and goes as he fights through his confusion and groggy mind. The pain still writhing his body.
Snow. Cold and fresh invades his nostrils. Her. The two-legged female is close. Coming closer.
Not two-legged female. A girl. A human girl.
The thoughts fly away when a soft voice reaches his delicate ears.
He doesn’t understand her. The human. It’s there somewhere in his mind. He should know these things. What happened to him? He feels, though. A need so high it has his body twitching from it.
In a blink, he has the girl on her back. His head is resting on her soft middle. Arms wrapped around her warm small body.
Home. Mine.
They talk. She talks. He doesn’t understand her strange words. He’s content. Happy.
Cinnamon. Male.
Dean crawls up the rest of her body, covering her completely with his new strange form, considering her pale blue eyes that look of ice.
Eyes of ice. The scent of snow. My winter goddess.
A growl bursts through his funny shaped mouth. Not as terrifying as he would like but it stops the cinnamon smelling male who dares to come to close to what is his.
Mine. I must mark. Make mine. Others stay away. From Mine.
"Mine." He growls.
He sinks his teeth into the soft flesh of the girl. A small pop sounding as his teeth pierce her. Her warm blood is flowing down his throat.
She is mine.
It’s the last fleeting thought before darkness takes him.
Avery
I squint at the bright light shining in my eyes. Ugh. What happened? It feels like I worked myself to the bone. My muscles quiver and there is a pounding in my head. And why am I lying on the ground? Outside?
"Hey, you feel okay?" Cam’s voice is soft coming in front of me.
I raise my head up and see him sitting cross-legged in front of me. I turn my head to the left and jerk back a little. There not even ten paces away from me is a man. A very pale naked man on his hands and knees, face hanging towards the ground. He’s panting so hard it has his whole body moving up and down in time with his breaths. The muscles in his back and arms are straining.
Oh, my god. I slowly turn my head back towards Cam shell-shocked.
My eyes are huge, “Why is there a naked man next to me?" I whisper harshly out at Cam.
He smiles cheeky, “That is Dean."
What? Wait a minute. The wolf. Dean. It all comes rushing back to me. The black wolf, Dean I was pushing my emotions on to bring out of the Rage. The howls and very human screams. The sound of bones breaking that had my teeth hurting. The bone warning fugitive I felt from it the whole ordeal. I must have passed out. I slowly climb to my knees, setting on the back of my legs.
"You were only out for a minute or two?" Cam answers my huh look.
That’s good at least. Minutes is so much better than days. My hands come up fast squeezing on either side of my head as this pounding feeling intensify.
"You need to let him in Avery. You can�
�t keep the link blocked." Cam says quietly, squinting warm brown eyes at me.
I narrow my eyes in return. He never said I had to be continuously linked up to Dean. It’s like an invasion of our personal space. My private world. My personal bubble Dean did well and popped; I guess he wouldn’t care. Cam, it seems leaves a lot out when he tells me things. Important things.
I let out a groan of the pain. Hitting me harder. Oh god. It feels like my head is going to burst open like a watermelon.
My eyes squeeze shut as I find the now black thread linking Dean and me. It's like I have a door in the middle of the link, blocking it from entering me. With a deep breath, I jerk the door open. Better fast than slow.
The sorrow and loneliness knock me back onto my hands. A sharp cry is pulling from my throat. Confusion and fear come so intensely it has my vision going blurry.
I feel this need to be close to him. To help him. It’s all me, this feeling. Next thing I know I’m sitting in front of this frail man. Dean feels like he will break any second. Worse than before.
My hand lifts slowly on its own accord. I run my fingers through his white as snow hair as I try to send a peaceful feeling towards him through the newly opened link.
"Ahh." I screech as Dean moves too fast for me to see. One minute he’s bent over and the next his arms are around my waist, head laying on my belly with me on my back, our legs tangled together. He snuggles up to me like I’m his favorite teddy bear.
What the hell.
My hands are up in the air not touching him as my face turns beet red. I have a naked man lying on top of me. I bit my lip nervously and so out of my element. Why is he laying on me? And naked for that matter. What to do?
I send a beseeching look at Cam, whose mouth is hanging open.
"Calm him." Cam sputters.
Yeah Okay. How am I supposed to do that when I’m nothing but a bundle of nerves? Seriously. This is so terrifying. I’ve never seen a naked guy before and to have one laying entirely on top of me clutching me like I’m his lifeline is just. God, I don’t even have a word for it.
I take a much need deep breath getting a whiff of fresh rain with a hint of saddle wood, relaxing my muscles sending peace and calming vibes through our link, which I’m totally not feeling. I hope that’s the only thing I’m sending through.