Five Ladies Go Skiing

by Karen Aldous

  Cathy

  ‘One more glass of wine, ladies,’ Neil rose to his feet and, after attracting Katja’s attention, pointed his finger to one of the bottles of Gamay on the table, then signalled with a finger and his thumb for two bottles. As though checking for protest, he raised his brows as he scanned the group. He was clearly enjoying his chat with Ginny, and vice versa. Ginny was looking relaxed and it would be a shame to break up their little soiree.

  Kim didn’t appear so relaxed. She sat back in her chair, her mouth twisting. I guessed she was finding Christoff and Angie’s behaviour a little awkward too, as I was. Christoff was encouraging Angie and I suppose I had to admit, maybe Anthony was right. Some men did prey on women, even older women. Although it’s not out of character for Angie. She does revel in men’s attention. I’ve seen her and Anthony flirt together at times when we’re out, and she flirts with Mike and Terry too, but it’s all very innocent and harmless. Well, I believe it is. Maybe Kim is anxious Angie is overexcited. She doesn’t get to see it much.

  ‘Yes, I’m rather tired too,’ I said, feeling drained from my earlier tête-à-tête with Anthony and noticing Lou yawning, but as Katja arrived beside Neil with two more bottles of Gamay, we both shrugged and gave one another a thin-lipped smile.

  ‘Thank you, Neil. That’s very kind,’ I said.

  Kim blew out a sigh, ‘Yes thanks, Neil. Last one and we’ll head back. It’s becoming very hot in here.’

  ‘Yes,’ Lou and I agreed. Lou fanned her face and took her lip gloss from her pocket and unscrewed it. ‘Really hot,’ she moaned, adding gloss to her lips.

  Kim tapped Angie’s arm. ‘Last one, beautiful, and we should go.’

  Angie held out her empty glass and made the widest grin. ‘Yes, my Flowers, I know. Just this one.’ She leaned towards Lou and I and said softly, ‘I don’t like to break up the party.’ She jolted her head towards Ginny and Neil. ‘So good to see her happily engrossed. I’m excited. Jealous but excited. Oh, how much greener the grass looks when you’re married. I’m thinking I should make sun while the hay shines!’ Angie peered back towards Christoff who had disappeared.

  ‘Make hay while the sun shines,’ I corrected her.

  ‘Yes, that one,’ Angie said, distracted by the sudden absence of Christoff. ‘Where did he go?’

  Lou shrugged. ‘To the loo?’

  ‘Which is exactly where I need to go,’ Neil added as he finished pouring wine and sauntered in the same direction. Ginny shuffled her chair closer.

  Kim gave Angie a prod. ‘And there’s no making hay, you saucy minx.’

  ‘I agree,’ I said tilting forward and cupping my chin with both hands so that Tom and Florian couldn’t hear. ‘You have a perfectly wonderful, sexy man at home.’

  Angie took a slug of her wine, slammed down her glass and leaning forward, said in a low voice, ‘I might shock you here, Flowers, but I must tell you that man is worth considering having an affair with, or a fling. I don’t want baggage, just a fling.’

  ‘Angie!’ I think we all screamed at once, but my jaw was hanging.

  Angie gave her Tina Turner stomp. ‘What? I mean, Rob and I are good, we still have sex, but it’s been so long since I’ve been with anyone else. I’ve kept myself in good shape; I’d just like to go out and shag for the thrill. Preferably with someone like Christoff. God, he’s so horny.’

  ‘Either you’re drunk or you’ve overdosed on those bloody beans you keep eating, Ang. Don’t be so stupid,’ Kim wailed.

  ‘Exactly,’ Ginny said. ‘You’re getting carried away. The alcohol has probably gone to your head. It’s gone to mine.’

  ‘So, it won’t hurt. It’s good that you’re relaxing. And I love that you and Neil get on; he seems really nice.’ Flicking her head to check behind her, Angie wasn’t to be swayed. ‘But come on, Flowers, be honest, how many of you wouldn’t want to try someone new?’

  I grabbed my chest. Anthony and I were having our problems, but this was a different realm. Angie was contemplating being unfaithful! Surely she was drunk! I accepted that flirting might be a bit of fun, but to risk hurting Rob and the children and everything they have together … My skin prickled. She had to be drunk.

  I had always felt compassion for Angie. Although she was Ginny’s friend first, and we were in our early twenties when we met, we hit it off from the start because we were both pescatarian and most people scoffed at you back then for having such an affliction. But sharing my oddness with Angie was liberating and when we saw each other more, we soon discovered we had something else in common – neither of us particularly got on with our parents. We discovered we both felt unloved as children and had craved affection.

  We still hadn’t worked out if our refusing to eat certain foods was a kind of rebellion, but we’d fought the same battle. I refused to eat meat because my parents insisted. She vowed she just couldn’t abide the thought of eating a beautiful creature. But she had grown up resenting being mixed race, and she admitted to me she craved her father’s attention. I do wonder if I felt the same way. She told me about her parents. Her mother was an immigrant from the Caribbean who had devoted her life to nursing in London. Angie believed she was naive to her father’s behaviour. He was a bit of a wide boy and womaniser. Angie had even witnessed him going into his van with women when he sold dresses at the markets.

  Perhaps something that had happened recently has triggered her behaviour now. Who knew what went on behind closed doors? She hadn’t mentioned anything that Rob might have done though.

  Admittedly, we hadn’t been dealt an evil father like Kim, but we constantly moaned about our parents and about how selfish and materialistic they were, clearly for different reasons but the result was the same; we felt emotionally starved. We were grateful, don’t get me wrong. We understood they worked hard and provided us with the security of lovely homes and possessions, but I remembered just wanting my dad to talk to me rather than at me, to listen to what my day was like or what I thought about a poem or a novel. Same with my mother, she never seemed to make time for me, her daughter, and only a little more for her son.

  And we observed over the years that neither of us had any affection for them like Ginny and Lou had for their parents, and Kim did for her mother. I thought my dad had his head up his arse at times. He had a certain amount of fame working in TV. It was a news programme, and everything revolved around his job and his reputation. He drummed it into me very early that I was to be good and never humiliate him. My mother, a typical obedient housewife, suffered the same fate, though thrived on organising charity and WI events rather than spending time with her children. I wondered if it was her escape, her coping mechanism. Like me with my reading. But they made sure we were disciplined. I had often heard her boasting that my brother and I were shining examples of well-behaved children.

  So, like the perfect daughter, I followed the rules, believing this was normal, curtailing my anger and frustrations, basically supressing my emotions and seeking comfort at the library, gorging on novels. Angie coped too, sought a new family. She joined the WRENS as soon as she was able and strove to reinvent herself.

  I found Anthony and thank goodness. The best thing that ever happened to me, surprisingly. Even at the tender age of twenty-four he had successfully built up two major artists in the music world, attracting further high-profile clients to his list. He brought me out of my shell by showering me with attention. His affection and confidence gave me strength I had never imagined. I had been teaching a year then, and we bought our first place together within months of meeting.

  I hadn’t told anyone about my inner struggles before Angie, not even Ginny and Lou. Angie and I had shared and mutually respected our inner gripes. So, knowing her, she’s been feeling uptight and I have no doubt the alcohol was responsible for her outburst. Though the thought of airing my dirty laundry, even to my friends, made my skin crawl.

  ‘Darling girl, I agree with Kim. You’ve had far too much wine,’ I said with a bright smil
e. ‘And I’m sure you don’t mean it. Besides, if you felt so strongly that you would risk everything for one night of sex, I firmly believe you would leave Rob before you’d ever consider something like that. You know it wouldn’t be fair to him or the boys. And what would they think of their mother?’

  ‘Oh, Cath,’ Angie said. ‘I can always rely on your moralistic compass to quash my dreams, but Christoff is so …’

  Seeing Christoff and Neil returning to their seats, I quickly changed the subject. ‘Anyway, I have a few books with me you could borrow. I’m sure they will keep your mind occupied whilst you’re here.’

  Angie peered up at Christoff and raised a raucous laugh. ‘Oh, Cathy, don’t worry. My mind entertains itself. I think it has much more fun than any book I could read. You are a sweetheart though,’ she said, picking up her glass.

  Ginny

  Poor Cathy, she looked hurt, but it showed how much she cared. She must have felt Angie was mocking her about her books and thinking they provided all the answers. But Cathy was right: Angie needed distraction if she was contemplating such risks with or without alcohol.

  Neil jolted me from my reverie. ‘I thought I’d ask your friend Angie if she would like to ski with me. I saw her sitting on her own at the bottom of the nursery slope earlier.’

  In an instant I felt deflated, wondering if I had read him wrong. Had Neil preferred Angie? I forced a smile nonetheless and encouraged him. ‘That’s so sweet of you. I’m sure she would love some company,’ I said. ‘Skiing,’ I added. ‘She’s been skiing for years, so would appreciate a ski buddy, I’m sure. She certainly doesn’t need lessons or to sit watching us.’

  Kim rose to her feet and clapped. ‘OK, my Pommie Flowers,’ she said, nudging Angie, ‘we need water and bed.’

  ‘OK, let me finish this.’ Angie drained the last of her wine and rolled her eyes.

  ‘Neil wants a word,’ I said, catching her eye.

  ‘We’re off, apparently,’ she groaned, sliding an arm into her jacket. Her reluctance to leave Christoff was branded on her face. I looked at my watch, and saw it was now ten-thirty. That wasn’t unreasonable.

  Neil stood up. ‘I was just saying to Ginny that I’m sure you’re keen to support your friends learning to ski, but would you like to take the lift up with me and ski in the morning, whilst these ladies are having their lesson?’

  She hesitated for a moment and, glancing back at Christoff, said, ‘Erm, yesh. I suppose I could,’ then pressing her nose in angst with her finger, continued, ‘yesh, that would be great, Neil. Shall I meet you outside where we meet Christoff?’

  ‘Perfect,’ he replied. ‘See you all in the morning.’

  I chuckled to myself inside. It was clear her opportunity to ogle our instructor was compromised. I was just glad that she wasn’t hitting on Neil.

  After saying our goodnights to our band of minders, for they were ubiquitous and alert to our welfare, we headed out into the freezing air and along crystalline tarmac for the short walk to our path. Lou and Cathy trod gently ahead. Kim followed. I waited for Angie to step in front of me.

  ‘Wah, shhlit,’ Angie slurred as her foot slid onto the steep icy track. I just managed to catch her arm as I found my footing. ‘Not my night tonight, ish it?’ she said.

  ‘It was fun though,’ I said, meaning it.

  ‘Yesh, it was. I was watching you. You and Neil were getting along great guns. He sheems really keen. What d’you think?’

  ‘I like him, we had a lovely chat. And, because he’s a widower, he knows what it’s like to be on his own.’

  Angie hiccupped. ‘I think there’sh a bit more going on there. I r … reckon he’s really into you.’

  I pressed my feet tightly against the ground. ‘Oh no. It’s too soon for anything romantic.’

  ‘Jeesh, I’d jump at the chance. You must be tempted? You’re a free agent now.’

  ‘It doesn’t mean I’m mentally prepared. In fact, I would still feel disloyal to Mike.’

  ‘’Til death though. You’ll not be doing anything wrong. Go for it if you like him. You’re still young and gorgeous. And, whatever they all say, I still don’t see any real harm in a little indiscretion.’

  It was sad, and I felt wounded to hear her confess to wanting a fling, especially with Christoff who was married too. Surely, she wouldn’t dare. My thoughts jumped to Mike’s words. Even a fling would break a heart.

  Kim turned her head, looking straight at me and scowling. It seemed she was still rattled by Angie’s awry thinking. I saw her wobble and I reached out.

  ‘Kim,’ I shrieked as she grabbed my hand and lurched forward into the snow. I slumped beside her and screeched as the thumping weight of Angie crashed on top of me.

  ‘Friggin great, girls!’ Kim muttered lifting her mouth, which was full of snow. ‘We need to find our feet, don’t we?’

  Cathy and Lou scrambled back up laughing, pulling at Angie’s arm whilst attempting to support one another.

  ‘Yep, we sure do,’ I said, shifting my frozen cheek up from the ice. ‘In more ways than one.’ I laughed but, in fact, I was beginning to gather hope that I would find my feet. I was actually beginning to recognise the old Ginny, the one who loved to be around her friends coiling with laughter. The Ginny who was confident in her decisions both domestically and in her work. The Ginny who loved her children.

  Of course, I was capable of driving or catching a train to see my children. How did I ever believe otherwise? I was still that person, Ginny Watts. Proudly independent-minded and spirited. Being here, away from the house and the god-awful job, with my gorgeous, caring friends had brought me back. Angie had expressed enough faith in me to employ me, a lovely man was making me feel special again and, surprisingly, I was attracted to him too. This trip was ruffling my tired, trodden feathers.

  Of course there was life after Mike. Mike had never consumed my life as much as he had these last three years, so the possibility that he may or may not have had an affair had paralysed my thinking. If I let that go I might stand a chance. I had found my feet and they were strong. What I hadn’t realised was that I had to restore my feathers. Get them strong enough to fly. A wave of anticipation washed over me. ‘I’m going to work on my feathers,’ I said with a snigger.

  ‘Oh, Gin, that’s hilarious, you’re drunk too,’ Lou roared. ‘So, you have wings now?’

  ‘I do,’ I said. ‘They’re a bit bent and out of shape, but …’

  Kim then burst into a snigger. ‘What are we like? I mean, sixty-year-old women, pissed as old farts, falling about in the snow. What would our children think?’

  I breathed with relief as Cathy and Lou hauled Angie off me. ‘No doubt they’d walk straight past us, deny any knowledge of us,’ I mused with a chuckle. ‘Ross would, for sure.’

  Angie staggered back onto her feet, scraping snow off her trousers. ‘I don’t mean to sound ungrateful, girls, but it would have added more drama if we’d have been rescued by the guys.’

  Kim rolled on her side, curling up her legs and feet to stand. ‘You’re obsessed, Ang. We need to get you neutered.’

  ‘Too late for that,’ Angie said, laughing.

  ‘She’s jesting, Ang,’ I said, not sure Kim meant to sound so curt. I was more concerned about finding a spot to grip my foot onto, but I found myself giggling too.

  ‘Are you two OK?’ Lou asked, reaching her hand out to Kim and appearing more anxious for us than herself. ‘Sorry, I was looking down to prevent myself slipping over. You could have slid all the way down.’

  ‘We’re fine, no great damage done,’ Kim said.

  Angie hurled out her hand and pulled me upright, steadying me. She then brushed off my jacket, which was glittering with grains of freezing snow ‘Well, you two do seem to have had a problem with those plates of meat of late,’ she said using the cockney rhyming slang for feet to refer to our fall in the ski shop. Although Angie was brought up in Greenwich, she was born in Stepney, an area close enough to hear the Bow Bell
s had they not been destroyed. You can take a girl out of London, but you can’t take London out of a girl. ‘I’ll have some explaining to do if I send you all home with broken limbs,’ she added.

  ‘And we’ll have some explaining to do if we send you home to Rob, knowing you’ve been unfaithful,’ Kim retorted sharply. ‘Tell me you didn’t mean that?’

  ‘Ouch,’ Angie shrieked.

  ‘Of course she didn’t,’ Cathy said defensively. ‘She’s had too much wine, that’s all.’

  Angie turned and trod carefully, leading us soberly back down the path as we filed again behind her. ‘And yes, actually, I did mean it. Sorry if it’s caused offence, my dears, but it’s such a powerful urge. ’Scuse the pun,’ she sniggered. ‘It’s my age. I’m worried death is creeping up, I don’t know. I can’t bear the thought that my body won’t be appreciated by any man ever again. I thought my friendsh might understand. Naturally, I wouldn’t want to hurt Rob and I would need to be discreet.’

  The laughter subsided. What was she saying? For a start, shouting about it was hardly discreet. Neither was committing the offence in a ski resort she and Rob frequented. My annoyance was keeping me gripped to the ground. She was brazenly risking destruction to her and Rob’s relationship. Over forty years together – and their family. Three boys, their wives, and seven grandchildren. I couldn’t let her do that. Just a trickle of words from Mike’s mouth had devastated me.

  Kim

  I’d seen it happen so many times at home in Oz. Doctors and nurses, porters and nurses, doctors and patients, nurses and patients, even a doctor and an auxiliary. Not to mention, my sister Paula! Hussy. I could never forgive her. Or Mike. Even if Ginny ever discovered the truth, which I suspect she hasn’t as I’m certain she would disown me, I don’t want anything more to do with my sister.