by Dayna Quince
“What solution can there be? Once my father knows there is a single chance it could happen immediately, that he might somehow benefit from the marriage beyond just the security of his daughters, he will. I know him. He thinks only of himself.”
“I’ll offer him something he can't refuse,” Callen said.
“What?” Luna picked up the pillow and hugged it to her chest, wishing she could jump into his arms for comfort, but not here, not where anyone could come upon them.
“Marriage to me will all but erase Bernie’s situation. One little talk with Mr. Rupert, and he won’t show his face in Northumberland again. I can be sure of that and so can Roderick. With our marriage and Anne's marriage, none of your other sisters need to rush into loveless and ill-suited unions. We will be taking care of all of you.”
It sounded too good to be true, and at the moment, she wanted to believe the solution could come that easily, but she knew better.
“What about your brother? You both seemed to be making progress toward a resolution.”
“We are because of you.”
“I don’t want to put that at risk.”
“We can be married quickly, have things settled with haste, and you can come with me and Theo. We can tour the continent and find a home that suits all of us. You and I can come back and visit your family. What do you think about that?”
Luna’s heart stuttered to a halt. Suddenly she was cold and goosebumps erupted over.
“I can't leave my family now. Bernie is gone. Even with Anne's marriage, this is a huge scandal. I don't think you understand. Lady Kirkland hates us, and if Lord and Lady Kirkland have found a way to ruin us, they will.”
Callen sat back in his chair. “Why would they hate you, you’re neighbors?”
“Because of Bernie and Chester. They’ve been friends for so long. I think there could be more there, but I'm not sure. But I know his parents suspect the same. If they saw a chance to separate Bernie and Chester permanently, they would take it.”
Callen stood and began to pace, and Luna hugged the pillow a little tighter. The morning had begun so lovely. As soon as she started to believe things could truly change for her and for her sisters, reality came crashing down to remind them that life was seldom so fortunate.
“It changes nothing. If we marry and Anne marries Roderick, it won’t matter what the Kirkland’s are trying to do. Your family will have powerful allies.”
“I don't even know where my sister is,” Luna retorted. “I can't leave my family now. My mother must be so distraught. What if we never see her again? There are too many… I just can't. I can’t even think about it right now.”
He stopped his pacing and turned to face her. “But you must. Your decision can alter the fates of your sisters for the better the sooner we marry. I will have to leave soon. I can't wait forever.”
“Then you just have to leave without me.” She pushed her feet. “My parents are already missing one daughter. They can't lose another. My mother is with child after seventeen years, and she needs me for that as well. I can't leave, I'm sorry. My sisters, my family needs me and Theo needs you. If you have to leave, I understand. I meant what I said. I'm in love with you, and I don't want you to leave but I must stay here.”
Her eyes welled up and Luna ran from the room, too distraught to say more. She didn't want him to see her fall apart.
She ran into her sisters climbing the stairs all together. What was happening now?
She followed behind them, hastily wiping her tears. They all went to Anne’s room, and Luna followed, climbing onto the bed like they used to do as children when they held sister meetings.
They began to talk all at once, arguing over each other, speculating about Bernie and Anne. Luna winced and covered her ears. She could feel a headache coming on already. She’d forgotten how loud they were all together in a single room. Luna hugged her knees to her chest near the edge of the bed beside Nic.
Anne held up her hand, and gradually, the others took notice and quieted. But instead of leading as she usually did, Anne turned to Georgie.
“You asked for this meeting. What is it you want to discuss?”
Georgie chewed her lip. “Where is Bernie?”
Anne shrugged. “I don’t know, but Violet says she is fine and safe. It is Bernie, after all, so we needn’t worry overmuch. I have a feeling she is with Chester or somehow under his protection.”
“Do you think they ran off to marry?” Josie asked.
Bernie and Chester marry? Luna had always suspected something was between them, but they’d always declared themselves friends.
“I don’t know what to think, and frankly, I’m too tired to think this morning,” Anne replied. “All I do know is that yesterday something occurred between Bernie and a guest of Lady Kirkland’s.”
“We know about that,” Nic interjected, sharing a glance with Odette.
Luna leaned forward to see past Nic. She’d spent most of the party on the lawn playing games with Callen, Theo, and Mr. Seyburn. But her sisters were all over the place. Apparently she missed quite a bit between her own activities and exhaustion.
Odette cleared her throat. “We were in the maze and Bernie was separated from us. We could hear her but we couldn’t find her. Then we could hear a gentleman speaking with her, and she called out to us. We tried to find our way back to her as swiftly as possible, but Lady Kirkland arrived before us, and Bernie had hit the man. I can only assume he tried to take a liberty. Lady Kirkland would not hear Bernie’s side and took her to Lord Kirkland’s study. She refused to let us stay with her. So we went in search of Violet to get help.”
“And I was in the house when Roderick left the study with Bernie and Chester to return to the castle,” Anne added. “Lady Kirkland said some unkind things. And now we are here. Father wants Bernie to marry this lad at Lord Kirkland’s insistence.”
Luna shivered. She wouldn’t let such a thing happen. Perhaps she ought to consider what Callen had said.
“This is ridiculous,” Georgie fumed. “He attacked her or she wouldn’t have struck him. She can’t marry a man like that!”
Anne nodded. “We will do everything to protect her. I know Chester and Violet will too.”
“What about you?” Jeanie asked from the foot of the bed.
Anne frowned. “I will protect her too.”
“No.” Jeanie hugged the bedpost. “What of you and Roderick. I’m still trying to believe my own eyes. He embraced you in front of everyone, and you declared you loved him.”
Anne blushed. “I do.”
“Since when?” Georgie asked. “For years, you’ve despised him. What changed?”
Anne chewed her lip. “I don’t know what to say other than…we both changed.”
Luna bent her head and rested her forehead on her arms, squeezing her eyes closed. She was happy for Anne, but her own heart was heavy. Should she marry Callen? Had she been too quick to deny him? But she just couldn’t imagine herself leaving her home. How could she help her family if she weren’t even here to do it? They needed more than just money. They needed guidance, and she needed them. She couldn’t imagine a day passing without seeing her sisters.
“Good. You saved us, Anne,” Georgie said.
Luna lifted her head and surveyed her sisters. She wanted to stay. She wanted to marry Callen, and she wanted to stay right here. Why couldn’t she have both? Her eyes stung. She sniffed and hid her face from her sisters, but they were all focused on Anne. She was alone in her misery. None of them knew she was torn between her love for them and her love for Callen. But she didn’t have the courage to tell them now. There was enough going on as it was. Her throat burned, as if the words of her own confession had grown thorns in her throat. A tangled bramble of words she needed to say but couldn’t.
“Now as far as Bernie’s situation, let’s just try to act normal and go about the usual plans for the party.”
Normal. Wonderful. She may as well try to fly. That was just as impossible.
/> A dark cloud settled over the castle as everyone seemed to wait for the storm to break, a first sign of Bernie, or any information about what would happen next. There was a peculiar tension that no one wanted to speak of but everyone was aware of.
Callen stood in the doorway of the billiard room, blinking, not remembering precisely how he got there. He staggered toward the drink cart and poured himself two fingers of whiskey and threw it back.
He felt like he was stumbling through a bad dream, and he couldn't wake from it. Not the kind that scared you awake, like falling from a cliff edge, but the kind where you moved from scene to scene, and you couldn't make your way back to the place where you were before, and nothing made sense.
He shook his head and poured himself another glass of whiskey, downing that one too. With a raging whiskey fire in his belly, he set up the balls on the table and yanked a stick from the wall. He lined up a shot and speared the balls, scattering them with satisfying cracks as they bounced around the wool felt edge.
His hands tightened around the stick, and he watched the balls until they stopped rolling and then set them up again.
Crack.
He did it over and over until his hands ached from squeezing the stick, and that's when he sensed someone else watching him.
He turned to find Theo in the doorway, leaning against the jamb, arms folded, boots crossed. He raised a brow at Callen in silent question.
“What's got you in such a bind?” Theo asked.
He pushed away from the doorjamb and strolled into the room, taking a stick from the wall and striking a ball into the pocket. Callen took the ball out of the pocket and set up all the balls again, but this time he let Theo take a turn and they started a proper game.
“She won't leave her family,” he said.
Theo took a shot before answering. “Family means a lot to her. She's been meddling in ours since the moment we first met her.”
Callen scowled at him.
“It is true, though, is it not? Are you at all surprised? She knows nothing else but her sisters and this peculiar way of life they have created for themselves. Did you think she would leap at the chance to abandon it?”
Theo took another shot when Callen didn't move.
“After the big to-do this morning with her father and Miss Bernadette, I'm sure she's in a state of shock. She'll need time to digest the plan, so you may as well tuck that pouty lip back in and resign yourself to waiting.”
Callen’s scowl fell away as he considered his brother's words. “But what if there isn't time to wait? What if we have to leave before? There are only four more days of this party, and Coombs could return any day now.”
“The next four days you have to convince her to change her mind, but these women, Callen, they are too strong and too smart to make snap decisions. They know better than to take things at face value. But I have faith in you, brother. You've never given up on me, and you won't give up on her.”
Callen, at last, took a shot and sank two balls.
So he would have to wait.
Again.
He didn't like it, but he supposed that was the extent of the control he had over the situation. Hopefully, the situation with Bernie would wrap itself up neatly or if not, maybe in two days’ time or before the party ended, Luna will have had time to think things over. Just because the party ended didn't necessarily mean he had to leave it right away. He'd send word to Coombs if they had to hide somewhere else.
Until then, this house party was the official known alibi, but it wasn't as though they could return to London or go to one of his estates where Judge Blackwood may find them. He’d have to take Theo somewhere else for the time being, and still, somehow, stay in touch with Luna.
But those plans sounded complex and rife for miscommunication. It would be better if he could take her with him when it was time to leave this party.
“So I guess I'll wait.”
“She's smarter than both of us. Give her a bit of time, and I'm sure she'll come up with a better plan than either of us are capable of,” Theo said.
Callen regarded him. “That sounded almost like a compliment.”
“It most definitely was. You’ve chosen well, brother. I envy you, almost.”
Chapter 23
For two days they didn’t speak, and Luna hadn't gone to his room. Even though she was sure he knew where her room was, he didn’t come to her either. Was he angry? She couldn't tell. Whenever she saw him, she was always surrounded by others, and he had a very stoic expression.
She could go to him. She should go to him. She wanted to go to him.
Luna was too afraid of the pain she’d caused. And what additional pain she could cause him and herself. She bundled her emotions inside her and waited for something to happen to force either of them to act.
Those two days stretched into the third. Luna woke in the morning with a heavy heart, hoping it wouldn’t go on much longer. Soon the party would be over, and he would have to leave as he’d said. Once he left… She could only hope she might see him again, that someday, somehow, he might return to England and to her. Luna came downstairs and the last person she expected to see in the front hall was her own mother.
She hurried down the last few stairs. “Mother? What are you doing here?”
Her mother embraced her, wiping her swollen red eyes with a handkerchief. “Have you not heard? Bernadette has been kidnapped. Lord Kirkland just collected your father from the house and away they went to rescue her.”
Luna’s knees turned to cold jelly. She locked them to keep from falling. Kidnapped? Could things get any worse?
“Rescue her? Where has she been?” Luna offered her mother the support of her arm, and along with Mrs. Kemp and the dowager Duchess, they ushered her mother into the dowager’s private parlor where Luna and her mother were left alone.
“That blasted girl, she's taken ten years off my life,” her mother said as Luna led her to a settee and helped her lie down, bringing her feet up on a cushion.
Her mother rested a hand on her belly, already swollen with her tenth child even though she was just shy of fifteen weeks, according to Luna's calculations. Luna touched her hand to her cheek.
“You mustn't worry. If Lord Kirkland is helping Father go find her…” She wasn’t certain her father was capable of such an endeavor. But certainly Lord Kirkland added some sense to the efforts, though Luna didn't know why he would be involved in the first place.
“Not just them,” her mother went on. “Lord Chester rode out first. It is he I put my faith in. He’ll not let any harm come to Bernadette.”
Luna drew back. “Lord Chester?” She suspected he might have played a role in Bernadette hiding from both their father and Lord Kirkland. What mischief had those two been concocting all this time?
“I'm sure he will,” Luna answered. Tea was brought in, and Luna prepared her mother a cup and fanned her in case she had begun to grow faint with worry.
“Please distract me. Tell me how the party is going. Have you been having a good time?”
Luna bit her lip. She’d been having the time of her life but not all of it pleasant. These last two days had been torture. She could hardly sleep and her appetite had disappeared completely.
She was utterly spent and heartbroken, not because Callen had broken her heart but just… The circumstances made it impossible to hope they would ever be together.
Her mother stopped Luna’s hand from fanning and tucked it in her own, resting over her belly.
“I sense something troubles you,” she said.
Luna’s cheeks burned as tears welled up. Her mother pulled her into an embrace and Luna wept, feeling like a small girl who'd skinned her knee. But this was so much worse. The weight of her broken heart bore down on her, and she couldn't begin to tell her mother what she’d done.
She'd fallen in love with a man who was so burdened by his own family that they might not be able to marry. They might not be able to be together at all unless Lun
a completely abandoned her own.
“Don't cry, my darling. I'm sure whatever it is you’ll find a solution. You've always had the gift of seeing through a problem, around it, above and below it, and then making the correct decision to benefit all. Just apply that caring mind of yours. Trust your heart.”
“But, Mama…” Luna sniffed and wiped her face with her sleeve. “It's not me I'm worried about. It’s my sisters. What happens if I marry and my husband takes me far away from you? If I'm not there when you need me?”
“Now, darling, I would be so happy for you. If that were the case, I don't want you to live your life worrying about others. We will all be taken care of if you have found a man worthy of your heart. Do not let the fear of the unknown sway you. I could never live with myself if you chose otherwise. You and your sisters have been burdened with so much. To give up the chance of a life of your own, of happiness, to stay here would break my heart. Even if you are across the world. We would always be with you and as much as we need you here with us, we all want what is best for you. I'm afraid that does mean you should marry and live a life of your own away if need be, but hopefully it wouldn't be too far, would it?”
“I don't know, Mother. I'm not sure.”
Her mother cradled her face in her hands. “Is it one of the lords here?” she asked in a whisper.
Luna nodded. “I haven't told anyone this, but… Lord Densmore, he and I have…fallen in love.”
Relief flooded Luna as she at last was able to tell someone how she felt about Callen.
“Lord Densmore? Oh Luna, how blessed you are to find not only love, but the love of such a kind man.”
Luna blinked at her mother. “You’ve met him?”
“A time or two. But I'm more familiar with his brother. He's been by to visit during the party, and he talks a lot about his brother—bitterly but with love.”
Luna was stunned to hear that Theo had been visiting her mother. He'd never mentioned it, though they hadn't done much talking. Did Callen know?
“What is your advice? I need your words of wisdom.”