Osmosis

by Susan X Meagher

  He shifted her big bag from one shoulder to the other. “Two reasons. One—I like you; two—I wanted to apologize.”

  “You do?”

  “Yep. The last couple of times I saw you, I acted like a dick, and I wanted you to know I was sorry. You were always up front with me, but I acted like we were engaged or something. That was just … dickish,” he said, chuckling at his newly coined word.

  They were crossing the street to the parking lot when she looked up at him. “What was up with that? I thought you were good with how things were between us.”

  “I was,” he said, shrugging. “But that was when we both agreed we weren’t ready to settle down. When you settled down about two minutes later …” He raised an eyebrow and looked at her. “I don’t like to lose.”

  “I don’t like to feel like a game,” she said, scowling at him while he opened her door. She got in and waited for him to join her.

  He settled in and buckled his seatbelt. “You’re not a game. I just felt a little … played. If you had said you were ready to get serious, I would’ve been down for it. It pissed me off when I realized you were ready to get serious, you just didn’t want to get serious with me.”

  She reached over and grasped his forearm, blinking when she felt how large it was compared to Jordan’s. “That’s not how it was. I can’t … I can’t explain it, Conor, but I wasn’t rejecting you. The timing was just bad for us. I think … no, I know … that pregnancy scare was kind of a deal breaker. It really freaked me out.”

  “Me too,” he said. “But in a different way. It made me think I was ready to settle down; it made you wanna run away from anything that produced sperm.”

  He gave her a half-smile, but she could see it was insincere. “No, it wasn’t sperm. The timing was just right with Jordan. I’m not into that ‘there’s only one person that can make you happy’ stuff. But I do think you’ve gotta have some luck to have things click.”

  “And you and Jordan click.”

  “Totally,” she said emphatically. “If I could, I’d marry her.” He turned to her and she could see the muscles in his jaw loosen, then his mouth break into a smile.

  “I’m happy for you … both of you.”

  Their eyes met and she could see the sincerity in his blue eyes. “Thanks. It feels fantastic, Conor. I’d always tried to avoid getting too involved. But with Jordan—I don’t have an option.”

  He put the key in the ignition and turned the engine over. “So, being a lesbian must be the right fit for you.”

  “Don’t go nuts on me,” she said, laughing. “I love Jordan, but I’m not a lesbian.”

  His eyebrow rose again, and Mia was struck by the remarkable resemblance between him and Ryan. “I mean it. It’s not an issue—since I plan on being with Jordan forever, but I don’t feel gay; never have.”

  Conor gave her a puzzled glance, then backed his truck out of the parking space. “Okay. I don’t get it—but it’s your life. You should know.”

  “I do,” she said. “It’s just hard to explain to people who think there are just two ways to be: gay and straight.”

  “There are only two in my book,” he said. “The first time I check out a guy’s ass—I’m gay.”

  “Not even in the locker room at the gym?” Mia taunted. “At the urinal?”

  Conor shrugged. “I’ve looked. But just for comparison. I’m always worried about a guy who won’t look any lower than my head. It’s weird when a guy’s really careful not to look. Always makes me think he wants to look, but knows he won’t be able to stop. It’s funny,” he said, giving the matter some thought. “It’s having a guy look at your ass that creeps you out. Every guy wants to know how big another guy’s dick is. That’s normal. But if a guy’s looking at my ass—that’s gay.”

  “Fascinating,” Mia said. “Just fascinating. Do many guys look at your ass?”

  “Yeeeeeeah,” he said, blushing a little bit. “More than I like to admit. Ryan says I look just gay enough to make guys think I’m in the club.”

  “Huh.” Mia sat sideways in her seat and looked him over. “You look straight to me. But you are a little … clean for a straight guy.”

  “Yeah.” He nodded. “Ryan says I care too much about how I look to be straight.”

  Mia giggled. “It doesn’t bother you to talk about this?”

  He gave her a puzzled glance. “Why would it?”

  “I don’t know. Most guys wouldn’t like to admit that they look a little gay.”

  “It’ll bother me when more men than women check me out. Until then … the boys can look all they want. Just don’t touch the merchandise.”

  “Has anyone ever tried?”

  “To touch me?” he asked, his voice rising.

  “Yeah.”

  “Hell no! I’d clock a guy who tried it!”

  Mia sat up straighter in her seat. “Would you really? You’d bash a gay man?”

  Looking to see if she was kidding, he said, “Bash? It’s not bashing if he grabs you! What would you do if a guy grabbed your ass?”

  “Probably try to knee him in the crotch,” she admitted.

  “I rest my case. Men are dogs. Doesn’t matter if they’re gay or straight. Give ’em an inch—”

  “And they’ll grab your ass,” Mia said, finishing his observation. “I guess I never thought of it like that. But you have a point.”

  “It doesn’t bother me if a guy politely checks me out. I give him a ‘not interested’ look and that’s the end of it. But if some jerk ever got aggressive with me—lights out! You gotta draw the line somewhere.”

  “What if a woman tried to grab your ass?”

  He smiled at her, his sexy grin in place. “I have a double standard. I’d allow that. How about you?”

  “Mmm … I probably would too. Or at least I would have before Jordan.”

  His grin remained. “Good thing you’re not gay.” He winced when she slapped his bare arm, and they teased each other all the way to Berkeley.

  Jamie and Catherine sat in traffic on the 101 freeway, waiting to exit near The Mission. “Do you think the cousins will consider a building outside their neighborhood?” Catherine asked.

  “I don’t think they much care where it is, so long as they don’t have to drive too far to work on it.”

  “This one sounds promising. Did you bring your little camera?”

  “Yep.” Jamie nodded to where it laid on the back seat. “You might have to take the pictures, though. I don’t think I can do it with one hand.”

  “How’s your arm feeling, honey?”

  “Not too bad I elevate it and that helps. I don’t think about it much unless I try to use my arm and find that it doesn’t bend.”

  “I’m more than happy to take pictures if the building merits it.” Catherine frowned. “Are we close?”

  “Yeah.” They’d exited the freeway and were slowly cruising down Dolores, and Jamie said, “There it is. Chula Lane.”

  Catherine turned left and slowed down, looking for a place to park. “I’d better find something on Dolores; the smaller streets never have anything.”

  Jamie agreed, and a few minutes later they were blessed by the parking gods. Walking together down the street, Jamie stopped at Chula Lane and looked around. “Not bad,” she said. “It goes through to Church, but it’s not as busy as 17th or 18th.”

  Catherine smiled at her daughter. “A year ago I wouldn’t have believed we’d be walking around this neighborhood looking at apartment buildings.”

  Grinning, Jamie said, “It would have been a stretch, wouldn’t it? I remember the first time I drove to Ryan’s. I was going through The Mission thinking, ‘How am I gonna be polite if she lives over some little taco stand?’”

  “Dear,” Catherine said fondly, “you wouldn’t have noticed. Tacos would have become your favorite food.”

  Jamie nodded her head, a little embarrassed. “I guess I was a little dreamy-eyed.”

  Linking their arms together,
Catherine said, “I wish I had known what you were going through then. It would have been nice to share that with you.”

  “Mmm … I wasn’t much for sharing then; wish I could have been. But I was as clueless as it’s possible to be.”

  “You’ve done well for yourself in a year. I always knew you could master anything you put your mind to.”

  Jamie leaned over and kissed her mother on the cheek. “You helped me a lot, Mom. Without your support … I don’t even wanna think what I might have done if you’d let Daddy speak for both of you.”

  “You know,” Catherine said thoughtfully, “even though it led to the breakup of my marriage, I’m very glad I’m learning to stand up for myself.”

  “And for me,” Jamie said. “That’s what made me see how much you loved me.”

  Her smile was so wide her eyes nearly closed. “I do love you,” Catherine said. “I always have. I’m so happy that I’m your mother.”

  “We’re both coming into our own, Mom. The Evans … uhm … we’re doing well.”

  In a moment Catherine’s smile was gone, replaced by a look of deep concern. “You don’t like that I’m changing my name, do you?”

  “No. But I’d probably do the same thing if I were in your position. I understand why you don’t want Daddy’s name any more.”

  Catherine stopped, grasping Jamie’s arm to slow her down. “That’s not why I’ve done this. Your father and his name had almost nothing to do with this, dear.”

  “Then what did?” Jamie’s chin was sticking out, and that didn’t make her look very open-minded.

  “I truly wanted to honor my great-grandmother. I didn’t just want to return to my maiden name, because I wasn’t much of a person when I was that young woman. I chose this name to help me have a role model. I don’t want to be known as Senator Evans’ ex-wife, nut it’s his notoriety I don’t want to be associated with, not the man.”

  Jamie forced a smile. “Okay. I’ll try to think about it from that perspective.”

  Catherine nodded. “Let’s go see this apartment building.”

  Ray was waiting for them. Jamie looked up and then said to the realtor, “Why would anyone put those nasty shingles on a building?”

  Smiling, Ray said, “People didn’t want these old buildings to look old. This was the craze in the 40s and 50s.”

  “Hmm … can they be taken off?”

  “Sure. Anything can be taken off. But they’re probably asbestos. That’ll cost a bit.”

  Jamie handed Catherine her camera. “Take a picture of this lovely green building, will you?”

  They spent about half an hour looking at the interior, and even though it took a lot of imagination, they all agreed that it belonged in the possible category.

  Jamie took her phone out and called Niall. “Hi,” she said, “Mom and I just looked at the three flat on Chula Lane. It’s a dump, but it’s a reasonably priced dump.”

  “Now what?”

  “Uhm … that’s why I’m calling you. Would you like to take a look?”

  “I could. But I’m not in charge.”

  Rolling her eyes, Jamie said, “I took pictures. I’ll show them to all of you and see what you think. How’s that?”

  “Good. Good. See ya.”

  Jamie looked at her mother. “Being the real estate agent for the O’Flaherty cousins is a little tougher than I thought it would be.”

  Back in the car, Jamie said, “Do you have time to stop at Kinko’s?”

  “Of course. For what?”

  “I’m gonna print these pictures and drop them off at each house. Then I’m gonna tell them to go look at the outside and let me know if they want to schedule a visit. I can’t make the decision for them … at least not so they notice.”

  Part Seven

  Conor carried Mia’s bag to the front door and waited patiently while she rang the bell six times in fifteen seconds. She had a key, but she wanted to make an entrance. She and Conor smiled at each other when they heard quick footsteps and a shouted, “Keep your shirt on!” booming from the house.

  “Ryan’s home,” he said. “Such a dainty girl.”

  The door was flung open and Ryan reached out and grabbed Mia, lifting her off her feet. Instinctively, she wrapped her legs around Ryan’s hips and kissed her. “I didn’t know you cared,” she giggled. “Don’t let Jamie catch us.”

  “She’ll never know,” Ryan said. “She called and said she’d be home soon, but we can have fun until she gets here.” She nuzzled her face into Mia’s neck and blew a loud raspberry against her skin. “Now that I’ve got you, I’m never letting you go. You’re mine now.”

  Mia ran her hands over Ryan’s shoulders, then leaned back a little and pinched her cheeks. “I might not argue. You’re lots softer than Jordan is now. Would Jamie mind sharing?”

  “I’m gonna take off before you even think about answering that,” Conor said.

  “Hey, come in and hang out,” Ryan said. “Stay for dinner. I promise I won’t gross you out.”

  Conor laughed. “It wouldn’t gross me out if you weren’t involved. It’d be much better for me if Jamie and Mia and Jordan hooked up.”

  “Not gonna happen,” Ryan said. “Well, I can’t speak for Mia and Jordan, but Jamie’s not into sharing.”

  “There’s not enough of Jordan to share!” Mia interjected. “If she doesn’t put on some weight, she’s gonna blow away.”

  Ryan placed Mia onto the floor. “Come on in. You too, Conor. I’ll make whatever you want for dinner.”

  “I want some of that pizza you and Jamie are always talking about,” he said.

  “Done! I love to order out. Especially when it’s my day to cook. Pizza good for you, Mia?”

  “Hell, yes! I haven’t had pizza since I left. Jordan can’t eat bread or cheese, so our version of pizza would be tomato sauce, oregano and basil.”

  “You know you’ve lost a few pounds too,” Ryan said, looking her over. “You look good, but you’re almost too thin.” She pulled on a few locks of Mia’s hair, smiling when the curls sprang back into place. “Your hair looks cute. I’ve never seen it so long.”

  “Thanks. I was gonna get it cut, but now I think I might let it grow.”

  “What’s with Jordan being so skinny?” Conor asked. “I didn’t know you were supposed to be thin for volleyball.”

  “You’re not,” Ryan said, looking a little displeased. “Jordan has some trainer who wants her to be as skinny as a stick and then start putting muscle on. It sounds stupid to me, but he’s calling the shots.”

  “What’s up with that?” Conor asked. “She was thin before.”

  “Not like she is now,” Mia said. “She’s all bony and sharp. She’s lost her …” she shot a look at Conor, “…some of her best parts. But she’s down to the percentage of body fat that the trainer wants, so she’s supposed to start eating a lot more protein and working with heavier weights.”

  “I hope that guy knows what he’s doing,” Ryan said. “How’s her energy level?”

  “I don’t think it’s as good as it was, but she doesn’t agree.” Mia shrugged helplessly. “If they told her to eat rat poison, I think she might do it. She wants this sooooo bad.”

  “You’d think the Olympic team would have somebody competent,” Ryan said. “But maybe she should go to the doctor and have some blood tests done. She might be hurting herself.”

  “Don’t give me anything else to worry about. Being in a relationship is a full time job!”

  Ryan gave her a big hug, holding onto her while kissing her head. “It is, but it’s a great job, isn’t it?”

  “The best I’ve ever had,” Mia agreed. “Of course, it’s the first job I’ve ever had, so what the hell do I know?”

  Dinner lasted until after ten o’clock, with Ryan having to run out to the store to buy another bottle of red wine when they’d run out. She walked Conor out to his truck, and gave him an enthusiastic hug when they reached the door. “I don’t know if you were b
eing sincere, but you acted like everything was normal between you and Mia. Thanks for being so mature.”

  “I had nowhere to go but up,” he said, chuckling. “Besides, it’s obvious Mia’s hooked. If I keep acting like an ass, you guys won’t want me around when she’s here. And I really like her.”

  “I do too,” Ryan said. “And it’s a lot of fun having you here when Mia’s home. I think you guys can be good friends.”

  “Yeah. Just what I need—more girl friends.” He kissed Ryan’s cheek and said, “You’ve gotta branch out and get some straight friends, really straight friends. Ones who throw up a little at the thought of kissing a woman.”

  Ryan laughed. “I’ll look around. Maybe there’s a club at Cal.”

  “That’s all I ask. My needs are simple.”

  “Thanks for picking Mia up, Con. I won’t even charge you for the pizza.”

  “You’re all heart. I might come see you play on Sunday. Any chance you’ll get in?”

  “The usual. I’m first off the bench, so you never know.”

  “Okay. See ya.” He kissed her cheek and got into his truck, the sound from the massive engine reverberating down the quiet street.

  Jamie and Mia were still sitting at the table when Ryan went back inside. “One of you has to get up at 7:00,” she said, looking pointedly at Jamie.

  “I know, I know. But I wanna stay up all night and talk to my buddy!”

  “Since I escaped having to cook, I’ll clean up. You guys go get ready for bed. I assume you were up at dawn?” she asked Mia.

  “5:30, as usual. I’m not sure what the time difference is between here and Russia, but Jordy’s coach usually wants them to stay on the same schedule. She might be getting up at four in the afternoon!”

  “Her coaches sound like … mmm…” Ryan considered her options, “… idiots.”

  “That’s what I think. But I try not to say much to Jordan; she’s like a cult member.”

  “Go get ready for bed,” Ryan ordered. “Jamie needs her nine hours.”

  A blonde eyebrow rose. “Then why don’t I ever get more than seven?”

  “’Cause you’re always up too late yapping,” Ryan said. She ducked the spoon her lover threw at her, eyes going wide when it almost hit a vase filled with jonquils. “Ooo … that was close. I’ve gotta teach you better. You aim for the gut … then even if you’re too high or too low, you still hit something. Being an only child really screwed you up.”