House of Nails

by Lenny Dykstra

  26

  BASEBALL GODS

  God gets you to the plate, but once you’re there, you’re on your own.

  —TED WILLIAMS

  It’s time to put your game face on. This chapter will contain no jokes, no pussy stories, no drug-fueled drama, no private-jet pipe dreams, no gambling/donating escapades, no prison war stories, or any other topic that is not about the business of baseball.

  For those of you who don’t know, or don’t care, let me clue you in on something: don’t think for one second that professional baseball is not a business. In fact, it’s a very serious business. How serious? In 2015, MLB enjoyed revenues of approximately $10 billion.

  What you will be reading is not from some fucking “bean counter” who never played the game. Quite the contrary, you can be confident in the fact that I walked the talk. I did it on the field.

  I played in the major leagues for twelve years. I led the league in hits in two separate seasons. In 1990, I led the league with 192 hits, and in 1993, I led the league with 194 hits. Moreover, I also led the league the same two years, 1990 and 1993, in a stat that 99 percent of you most likely don’t even know exists: “times on base.” I was on base 288 times in 1990 and 325 times in 1993.

  If you want the blueprint for what it takes to be successful at playing the game of baseball at the highest level, keep reading.

  It wasn’t because I was the best hitter, not even close. It was because I figured out how the game of baseball works over a 162-game schedule.

  I learned at an early age that professional baseball players are in the business of entertainment. A player needs to make people want to pay money to watch him play. I loved making the fans happy, I loved putting on a show. That’s why I hung my balls out there every time I put on a uniform. Especially today, it costs a small fortune to take a family of four to a Major League Baseball game. After all, when you think about it, without the fans, there is no baseball.

  Now, let’s get right to the facts. In Major League Baseball, approximately 90 percent of all players are essentially equal in talent. This is a topic that is rarely, if ever, discussed. The reality is that only about 1 percent of the players in the big leagues are what I define as “elite players.” Meaning, they are going to be stars no matter what because of their extraordinary talent.

  One of the keys to being successful at the big-league level is learning how to manage failure, but a player must also understand how to deal with success as well. I have seen players get hot and think they have it all figured out, only to find themselves sitting in front of their locker, 0 for their last 15, wondering, What the fuck happened?

  The majority of the players I played with had more raw talent than me, but precious few of them knew the game like me. They didn’t understand how hitting over a 162-game schedule works. The majority of past and present players do not understand that there is only one right way to hit in order to be successful in the major leagues.

  For a player to fully grasp what I am talking about, so that he can make the right decision, that player has to have the best information. It comes down to getting the best-quality information possible, which is easier said than done.

  I am going to give you that quality information, which took me years to acquire. Nobody ever taught it to me; therefore, I had to figure it out myself. But when I finally did, it was almost like God himself said to me, “Okay, I am now going to make your life so much easier, so less complicated.”

  Now, don’t get confused, players will always fail more than they succeed, as there is no way around that fact, but it’s how they fail and how they succeed that will make the difference in the long run. The reality of the situation is that succeeding is actually very simple. Understanding this was the key to my success. It’s when you start questioning yourself, and complicating things, that it becomes hard. So here we go.

  There is a reason players get three strikes before they are out. What is that reason? Because the game is fucking hard! First, you have to hit a ball coming at you ninety-plus miles per hour. On top of that, today’s pitchers have figured out that the best way to get hitters out is to deceive them, which basically means they throw off their timing, and hitting is all about timing! Once the player hits the ball, they have to hit it where someone isn’t standing. Remember, there is a reason that the players over the past hundred-plus years man the same positions each inning. What is that reason? Because it’s all about percentages backed up by facts. In other words, since the inception of baseball, percentages show that the ball is going to be hit in those areas more often than not. Simple, right?

  So, now let’s focus on the at-bat itself. If the rules allow players to get three strikes, why would any hitter not use those same rules to their advantage? Meaning, as a hitter, you must take control of the at-bat until you get two strikes, and trust me, the pitcher knows this fact and so does the umpire. All of these things come into play; these are the little intangibles that make a huge difference in winning and losing. Approximately 90 percent of the players today have no idea how this works. The reason they are still somewhat successful is because of their talent, but they could be better if they had more discipline and weren’t so selfish. For example, when a player is leading off the ninth, down two runs, and swings at the first pitch, that player doesn’t have a clue how the game works or is too fucking selfish to care about helping his team win. That might sound harsh to you, but it’s really not, and I will tell you why. Playing baseball at the highest level is a serious business. They are playing for real money; it’s not just a baseball game. That player is paid an enormous amount of money by his organization to play baseball, which means he has a duty and obligation not just to himself but to his teammates, to the fans, and to the people who sign his paycheck to play the game right.

  He can’t hit a two-run homer with nobody on base, right? That means that player has one job to do at that particular at-bat, which is to get on base, period. Now let’s go to the percentages. We all know that the best hitters in the game are going to fail approximately 70 percent of the time. Knowing that, why wouldn’t any player make the pitcher throw a strike before he swings at a pitch? Clearly, he is putting himself before the team. Meaning, he knows he is most likely going to get a fastball, so he is swinging. What does that tell us? It tells us that this particular player either has no clue how the game works, or that he made up his mind to swing at a fastball before he even stepped into the batter’s box. I could continue on just this one subject, with multiple reasons why this player failed his teammates, failed the fans, failed the organization, and ultimately, failed himself. And that’s just one at-bat. But I will spare you the pain, because I feel the pain myself. So let’s move on.

  In the business of professional baseball, it’s either all or nothing; there is no in between. You either get on base or you don’t. Meaning a player cannot get too high and cannot get too low. It’s all about sticking to a game plan, day in and day out, as the professional baseball schedule is unlike anything a player dealt with before turning pro.

  That said, it took me years to finally figure out the right way to hit over a 162-game season. And I stress, a 162-game season. That’s approximately six months straight (seven if you add in spring training) of playing baseball. I cannot emphasize enough how important it is for an everyday player to understand that once he starts playing professional baseball, he will have to learn how to deal with the nightly “highs and lows” of the schedule.

  There is only one “right way” to hit at the major league level.

  How do I know that? What gives me the right to make such a statement? Because when I finally figured it out and trusted that the approach I was going up to the plate with would give me the best possible chance to succeed, I gained the confidence to take it into the batter’s box every at-bat—every night. But most important, I finally gained the “confidence” that what I was doing would get me the results.

  There are two key bits of information an organization shoul
d know before they make a decision to commit millions and millions of dollars to a player. The first is the player’s age. The second, which was often overlooked when I played, is what kind of lifestyle he lives off the field. Meaning, does he drink a lot? Does he smoke pot? Does he get his rest? An organization should know everything about a player before investing mountains of money, anywhere from $1 million to $200 million, in that player. I make this statement today because times have changed, and in a big way. A team must take into consideration that drugs are out! When I played, we could overcome, or offset, “lifestyle issues” by taking more drugs. As much as I hate to admit it, the drugs worked; not just physically, but mentally as well. That is no longer the case. So it matters! And it matters a lot!

  The overwhelming majority of professional baseball players do not hit the right way because they were not taught how. Nonetheless, I realize it takes tremendous discipline to develop a strategy and stick to it day in and day out. Unquestionably, it is extremely tempting to change things up, particularly when you’re in a slump. Similarly, it’s just as tempting to get greedy when you’re doing well. With a built-in failure rate of at least 70 percent before you step into the batter’s box, you need to tilt the percentages in your favor as best you can.

  According to Baseball-Reference.com, since 1984, players between the ages of twenty-six and twenty-eight have the greatest likelihood of being productive offensive contributors. Meanwhile, after turning thirty, they experience a clear and steady decline.

  Understanding the demands and nuances of a 162-game schedule dictates that consistently adhering to a simple strategy translates into the best opportunity for long-term success, regardless of your innate talent. Combined with the information on player productivity versus age, that should make the general manager’s job somewhat easier. Furthermore, in this era of analytics with a plethora of tools to evaluate talent, one would think that teaching players to hit the right way could only enhance a team’s chances for success. Success translates to more fans, which in turn generates more revenue, culminating in better business. When that happens, everybody is happy and everybody wins.

  27

  BEGINNING OF THE END

  It is well that the people of the nation do not understand our banking and monetary system, for if they did, I believe there would be a revolution before tomorrow morning.

  —HENRY FORD

  I was living in a beautiful home that I had custom built from the ground up, located in one of the most affluent country clubs in the United States, Sherwood Country Club. I bought the lot in 1998 for $1.8 million. That’s not a misprint; you’re reading it correctly, and that was just for the dirt, which was a bit shy of an acre. The address was 2672 Ladbrook Way, Thousand Oaks, CA 91361. The beautiful eight-thousand-square-foot custom-built house backed up to the first fairway.

  Across the street and up the hill (way up the hill) from me was Wayne Gretzky’s incredible mansion. I had always told myself that if it ever were to come up for sale, as long as the terms were right, then I would buy it. Owning it, I knew, was a perfect fit for the Players Club.

  One day, out of the blue, a real estate agent by the name of Nicole Van Parys knocked on my front door at Ladbrook. I happened to be working in my home office—my favorite room in the house, as I had it custom built with floor-to-ceiling mahogany. It looked like it came straight out of Architectural Digest. When I answered the door, she introduced herself and went on to tell me that she represented Wayne and Janet Gretzky. Everyone knew at that time I was flush with cash, and she knew that I was one of the few people living behind the gates who actually had the ability to perform and could buy the place if I wanted, so she took a shot in the dark and paid me a visit. She was a very classy, elegant woman who spoke with a slight accent; I believe she was from Paris. After we finished with the courtesy rap, the conversation went like this: “I know you and your wife are friends with the Gretzkys, and I know that your kids and their kids play together, so I thought I would let you know that Wayne and Janet have decided to privately sell their estate if the number is right.” I responded by saying, “What’s the number?” Ms. Van Parys answered me by saying $18 million. I said let me think about it, talk it over with my wife. She handed me her business card—it had great paper stock, I might add—and she was very professional and courteous. In saying good-bye, I told her, “If you don’t hear from me, come back and see me in a week and we will sit down and talk.”

  One week later she showed up. I walked her into my office and said, “Ms. Van Parys, first let me tell you why I would even consider making an offer on the Gretzky estate. I started a new company called the Players Club; it’s a lifestyle services company for millionaire professional athletes, their wives, and special VIPs. I would use the estate for Players Club events—I would only live in it for the first year, until the Players Club is up and rolling.” I went on to say that I wouldn’t be selling my house on Ladbrook, and then I pulled out a piece of paper and my black Montblanc pen and drew a line down the middle of the paper and a line across the top. After finishing, I said, “Ms. Van Parys, I am going to make this real simple. You see this paper? I drew a line down the middle for a reason. On the left side I am going to show you what I am bringing in a month and what my monthly nut [expenses] is, then we will see what’s left over and I will write down on the right side what I am willing to offer with ‘my terms.’ ”

  At the time, I was bringing in approximately $200,000 a month and wasn’t willing to spend more than $35,000 a month, locked in.

  They did come back, and they brought me a deal. Financing was arranged with Washington Mutual based on the deal I had outlined, except the monthly payments would exceed $35,000 with all the expenses. It was more than I wanted to pay, but I figured I could still swing it. Washington Mutual would lend me $17.5 million with a negative amortization loan with interest-only payments. I had been coming up with all kinds of ideas for how I would turn the Gretzky mansion into a profitable venture once I owned it. The agreement was simple, all the money was there, and the rate was reasonable, or so they told me. I actually was surprised when a few weeks later at the closing, they changed the deal. I had believed in these guys.

  They told me Washington Mutual could only put up $12 million of the $17.5 million purchase price.

  “Bye-bye,” I told them. “If all you can do is get me twelve million, I’m out. I gave you the terms. It was real simple: no money down, and if those aren’t the terms, the deal is off.”

  It wasn’t long before they came back and sweet-talked me into signing a modified version of the deal anyway. In addition to the $12 million I was getting from Washington Mutual, they had arranged for me to meet with another lender, First Credit Bank, who offered to give me short-term financing for one year of $8.5 million at 12 percent. Part of the deal was that my car washes (which were currently in escrow) would be cross-collateralized in the deal along with my current home. Under this new deal my monthly nut was going to be $150,000 a month—way more than I could afford. So Washington Mutual was selling me a deal in which everything I owned was put up as collateral, I was saddled with a hard-money loan that I had to replace in one year, and every month I was going to run a deficit of $25,000.

  The truth was, I really wanted that house, and the financing was supposed to be temporary, very temporary. “In thirty to sixty days,” the guy said, “I promise you will get your original deal. We will repackage the two loans into a consolidated loan on the original terms. Don’t worry.”

  I still wasn’t going to do it. I’m not an idiot. I knew I couldn’t afford it long-term.

  “Do the math,” I said to him. “I won’t be able to make the payments if there is a delay in refinancing.”

  He laughed, as if to suggest my fears were irrational. I figured he was right. Why would Washington Mutual set me up with a loan they knew I couldn’t afford? Of course they were going to refinance the deal right away. Why would they create a scenario that would fail?

 
The suits at Washington Mutual promised me, swore on a stack of Bibles, that within a month Washington Mutual would come up with the rest of the money and we would go back to the original loan deal.

  In the end I trusted that it would work out. I really wanted it to.

  I risked everything I owned by signing that deal.

  Remember, this was 2007, and lenders all over the country were getting rich by talking homeowners into loans they could never really repay. The practice at the time was to finance a ridiculous amount with super-low initial rates and affordable payments, and then buyers would refinance or sell for a fat profit before the real terms and adjustable rates kicked in and could bite them in the ass. If the homeowner couldn’t manage the payments when the terms got ugly, then what the fuck did the bank care? It would be just another house on the market for them to earn another commission from. Besides, they must have known the writing was on the wall by then, and so were just jamming through as many bad loans as possible before it would all be over.

  There was a plague of unconscionable loan deals by lenders across the land, and WaMu was one of the biggest offenders. According to a U.S. Senate permanent subcommittee investigation, WaMu paid high commissions to employees and outside mortgage brokers for the loans they brought in, and allowed borrowers to qualify for the loan by evaluating whether they could pay a low or even the minimum amount available under the loan. As long as home prices were appreciating, borrowers were able to refinance. Once housing prices stopped rising and then started falling, borrowers couldn’t refinance. Many people became stuck in homes they could not afford and began defaulting in record numbers.

  I really like the way Senator Carl Levin put it in his “Opening Statement Before the U.S. Senate Permanent Subcommittee on Investigations on Wall Street and the Financial Crisis”:

  On September 25, 2008, Washington Mutual Bank, a $300 billion thrift, then the sixth largest depository institution in America, was seized and sold to JPMorgan Chase. It was the largest bank failure in U.S. history.