DREAMING OF YOU GO PL

by Barbara Freethy

  * * *

  Barrett was feeling way too many emotions as he slid behind the wheel. Letting go of Kate's hand had been far more difficult than it should have been. They'd just had a very clear-cut conversation that showed how different they thought about love and marriage. She was not someone he needed to mess around with and vice versa.

  He just wished he wasn't so attracted to her, that he didn't like her passion and fire so much, that he didn't respect the fact that she knew what she wanted and she wasn't about to settle for anything less, that he didn't feel like he wanted to rise to the challenge she'd just laid down—that she couldn't fall for someone who didn't want to get married.

  He knew she could feel the heat between them. She was just determined to fight it.

  He should do the same. That would be the smart thing to do.

  "My car is at the office," Kate said suddenly, breaking into his reverie. "You can just take me back there."

  "Of course." Maybe it was better he wouldn't be taking her home, wouldn't be tempted to see if he could get himself invited inside.

  Kate's phone buzzed, and she reached for it. "I'm sorry. I have to take this. It's my grandfather."

  "No problem."

  "Grandpa?" she said. "Is everything okay? What? Is she all right?"

  He could hear a man's agitated voice on the line.

  "Wait. Where are you?" Kate asked, then paused. "I'll come right away. It's going to be okay." She listened for another moment. "Don't think that way. Grandma is strong. She's a fighter. I'll be there as soon as I can."

  "What's wrong?" he asked.

  She looked at him with fear in her eyes. "My grandparents were in a car accident. My grandmother is hurt, and it sounds serious. I have to get to the hospital."

  "I'll take you."

  "They're in Oakland. I have to get my car. Oh, God, Barrett, what if…"

  "Don't think that way," he said, repeating what she'd just told her grandfather. He made a U-turn at the next intersection, heading toward the Bay Bridge.

  "You don't have to drive me."

  "It's not a big deal. It will take longer for us to get back to your car."

  "All right. Thank you," she said, twisting her fingers together. "I've been telling them both that they need to stop driving. I even put apps on their phones, so they could get rides, but they've always insisted that they don't go far, that they're fine." She looked over at him as he came to a light. "My grandmother raised me. My grandfather was the dad I never had. I love them so much. I can't lose either one of them. I just can't."

  "I really hope you won't," he said heavily.

  Chapter Nine

  They found Kate's grandfather in the waiting room adjacent to the surgical center. He was a tall, thin, balding man who had a bandage on his head and looked pale and shaky as Kate embraced him. Barrett stood off to the side, not wanting to get in the way.

  "How's Grandma?" Kate asked.

  "She's in surgery," her grandfather replied. "They said there's internal bleeding. They're trying to stop it."

  "How are you?" she asked, her gaze narrowing on the bandage on his temple. "Did you hit your head?"

  "I'm fine. They checked me out. I just got a cut from some flying glass."

  "What happened?"

  "A car ran a red light." His gaze hardened with anger. "Damn red-light runner. It wasn't my fault, Katie. I had the green light. Witnesses said so. The kid came out of nowhere. And he hopped out without a scratch." He shook his head. "But maybe I should have taken another look or waited a second longer to enter the intersection."

  She put a hand on her grandfather's arm. "Don't blame yourself. It sounds like you were completely in the right."

  "Being right doesn't get your grandmother out of surgery."

  "Being wrong won't do that, either. She's going to be all right. She has to be."

  The older man nodded. "I can't live without her. She's my rock."

  "I know."

  Her grandfather's gaze moved past Kate, settling on him. "Who are you?"

  Kate started. "Oh, sorry, Grandpa. This is Barrett Fox. He was driving me home from dinner when you called, so he brought me here." She turned to him. "This is my grandfather, Lance Harding."

  "Sir," he said, shaking the man's hand. "I'm sorry about your wife."

  "Thanks for bringing Kate over. I was beside myself; I didn't know what to do."

  "You did exactly right," Kate said. "There's no other place I want to be than here. Now, when's the last time you got information?"

  "Awhile ago. The nurses rush around, but no one tells me anything."

  "I'm going to see what I can find out," Kate said. "I'll be right back."

  "Okay, sure."

  "Why don't we sit down," he suggested, motioning Lance to a nearby chair.

  The older man moved slowly and was a bit shaky on his feet but managed to sit down without falling. "Sorry I ruined your evening," he said.

  "You didn't ruin anything. I hope your wife will be all right."

  "Bess is a fighter." Lance paused, then looked at him with pain in his blue eyes. "She has always been stronger than me, but she looked…bad. I didn't want to say that to Katie, but I'm scared."

  He was scared now, too. Kate's love for her grandparents was huge. He didn't want her to have to deal with losing one.

  "Katie is a lot like Bess," Lance continued. "She's forthright, confident, and with the biggest heart. She always goes above and beyond. She's one special girl."

  He nodded. "I've seen her go above and beyond."

  "But Kate and Bess also carry a lot of pain, a deep wound that has scarred over but has never gone away. That pain comes from my daughter Evie. I don't know if Katie has told you anything about her mother."

  "Not a lot," he murmured, but he didn't think Lance was really listening to him. He seemed to be lost in his thoughts.

  "Evie is not a bad person, but she's selfish, and she doesn't realize how much hurt she leaves in her wake. She acts impulsively and she's never the one to suffer the consequences. But Katie has paid a price and so has Bess. I shouldn't be thinking about her now, but I can't help wondering if I should call her. If Bess…if she doesn't…well, Evie is her daughter. Does she have a right to know, to be here?" Lance asked.

  He had no idea how to answer that question.

  Fortunately, Lance didn't seem to really want an answer—at least not from him.

  "But even if I called Evie, would she come?" Lance muttered. "We haven't talked to her in a year. I'm not sure her number is good anymore. But at the end of the day, she's my daughter, Bess's daughter. Shouldn't she know that her mother is in surgery?" He paused, his gaze sharpening. "I'm sorry. I'm rambling on."

  "Don't be sorry. Families can be complicated."

  "That's for sure. Babies start out all sweet and innocent. It's an instant love affair. You never think you'll want to spend a second away from your child, but then kids grow up, and the distance can be more than you ever imagined." He drew in a shaky breath. "It was bad for us, but it was worse for Katie. She felt the sting of rejection from both of her parents. We tried to make it up to her, take care of her, love her as much as we could, but none of that made up for her not having a mother she could count on—not having a father at all. We used to get so angry with Evie. We'd demand she'd do better, but she just couldn't find it in herself to make that happen. And her father was just a worthless son of a bitch. Did Katie tell you her dad took off after she was born?"

  "She mentioned that."

  "The two of them didn't care their free love, their bliss, left a little girl without parents to watch over her. That's not love," Lance said scornfully. "Love takes work. It's about putting someone else before yourself. That's what Bess always did. She always put me first, and I tried to do the same." He sent Barrett an agonizing look of desperation. "We've been together so long, I don't remember a time when she wasn't there. I wouldn't know what to do without her. She's everything."

  He could feel the
older man's pain. He put a comforting hand on Lance's arm. "Hopefully, you won't have to know. And I have a feeling your Bess would want you to stay positive, keep the faith."

  Lance gave him a shaky smile. "That she would. I can be strong for her now. I can believe."

  "Yes, you can."

  They both rose to their feet as Kate returned. "The surgery is still going on," she said. "The nurse said the doctor will speak to us as soon as it's over."

  "I guess we just wait," Lance said wearily, taking a seat once more.

  "You can go, Barrett," Kate told him. "It could be awhile."

  He knew he should go. He and Kate were barely friends, and he didn't need to be a part of this. She probably didn't even want him to be a part of it, but he found himself reluctant to leave.

  He wanted to know if Bess would be all right. He wanted to be there to support Kate and Lance, because they were both really, really shaken. And there was a chance, a terrible chance, that things might get worse.

  "You know, I think I'll get us some coffee or tea," he said. "What would you like?"

  "It's not necessary."

  He glanced over at Lance, who had his head in his hands. "I think maybe some herbal tea."

  She nodded. "If they have it."

  "You got it. What about you?"

  "I'll take a tea, too."

  "Done."

  She gave him a grateful look. "Barrett, you're being really nice. Thank you."

  "It's not a big deal."

  "It is—actually. My grandmother is so important to me, even more so to my grandfather. Having you here, well, it makes me feel a little less scared—I don't know why. Maybe because you're so calm."

  He was touched by her words and a little unnerved by how close they were getting to each other. She didn't want him to leave, and he didn't want to leave—both desires probably neither one of them could have imagined a few days ago.

  "I'll be back in a few minutes," he said, deciding those were the only words he needed to say right now.

  * * *

  Kate sat down next to her grandfather and put her hand in his, giving him what she hoped was a reassuring smile.

  His expression was uncertain and fearful, and that terrified her. Ever since she'd been a little girl, her grandpa had been the male hero figure in her life. He'd been the one to bandage her up after a fall, comfort her with an ice cream sundae after some boy broke her heart, and the only one who could make her smile when she'd waited in vain for her mother to come home and keep whatever promise she'd made her.

  But it wasn't just her grandfather who had been there for her; it was her grandmother, too. They were her real parents. They were the people she loved most in the world and she couldn't imagine losing one of them. She kind of wished Barrett hadn't gone to the cafeteria. The man who had annoyed her beyond belief only a few days ago now seemed like a raft in a storm. She missed his strength, his confidence. Although, that seemed crazy, because he certainly wasn't the most optimistic person she'd ever met.

  "Did Barrett leave?" her grandfather asked.

  "He went to get you some tea."

  "That was thoughtful. He seems like a good man. I just about talked his ear off. But he was a good listener."

  "He can be," she said.

  "Is he your boyfriend?"

  "No. He's my landlord. His family company owns my office building, and he moved in downstairs. We barely know each other."

  "But you were out to dinner."

  "He was making up for something he'd done. We don't need to talk about him."

  "It keeps my mind off your grandmother. Tell me about him. What does he do?"

  "He's a divorce attorney, which makes our working situation difficult. This evening, he had a screaming couple in his office, and their argument spilled into the hall, and scared off one of my brides. That's why he took me to dinner—to apologize. I told him when he moved in last week that it wasn't going to work to have our opposing businesses in the same building, but apparently his previous office is under construction or something, and he's not planning on leaving any time soon."

  "I'm sure you can find a way to get along. You're good at figuring out what people need and making sure they get it."

  She thought about his words. He wasn't wrong. But she wasn't sure she wanted to know what Barrett needed, because if it was anything close to what she was thinking she needed…well, that would definitely not be a need she should try to fulfill.

  "I think it's better if we keep our distance," she said.

  "Then why is he getting us tea?"

  She let out a small, helpless sigh. "I don't really know. He doesn't seem to want to leave."

  Her grandfather gave her a compassionate smile. "That's because he likes you, too."

  "I never said I liked him."

  "I know you well, Katie. And you've been watching that door since he left."

  "I'm watching for the doctor."

  "You're a very bad liar."

  She gave up. "Fine. I do like him, but we don't have much in common. He's cynical, especially when it comes to love, and I'm the eternal optimist."

  "You don't have to think exactly the same to fall in love. Your grandmother and I are not the same person. She loves a party and thinks highly of just about everyone she meets. I'd rather sit in my recliner and watch a basketball game, and there are a lot of people I don't care for. Like that guy you used to date, Jimmy something. He always honked the horn for you, and you went running."

  "I was seventeen and I thought he was cool."

  "He wasn't."

  "No, he wasn't," she admitted. "I'd like to think I've gotten a little better at picking out potential boyfriends."

  "Or maybe you've just gotten gun-shy. When's the last time you introduced anyone to us? I'm thinking it's been a few years."

  "I've been busy building my business, Grandpa."

  "You know what they say about all work and no play…"

  "I know that I love my work, and it's where I want to put my time right now. I don't want to give that up for a guy."

  "I respect your work ethic and your passion for your job. But it won't keep you warm at night." He took a breath. "You know why Bess and I have lasted as long as we have?"

  "Because you really love each other?"

  "And because we've always given each other space to grow. You don't have to give up your life to include a man—at least not the right man. He'll be your biggest cheerleader."

  She smiled. "Well, I don't see Barrett cheerleading my wedding business. He thinks big weddings set the wrong expectation for a happy marriage."

  Her grandfather smiled at her. "I have a feeling you can change his mind."

  She wanted to tell him to let it go but talking about her love life seemed to be keeping his mind off her grandmother's surgery, and that was a good thing.

  She looked up as Barrett reentered the waiting room and tried to contain the little zing of excitement that ran through her at his presence.

  "I have chamomile tea, green tea with honey, and a coffee," he said. "What's your pleasure?"

  "I'll have the chamomile," her grandfather said. "It's what Bess likes to drink when she's upset."

  "And I'll take the green tea," she said. "Unless you want it?"

  "I'm good with coffee," he replied, as he handed out their drinks.

  She took a sip of her tea, happy at the rush of warmth that ran through her. Like her grandfather, she remembered all the times her grandmother had made her a cup of tea and told her to breathe deep and think positively. She definitely needed to do that now.

  Barrett sat down next to her and for a few quiet moments, they sipped their drinks and watched the double doors leading into the surgical area. Finally, a doctor in scrubs came through those doors and headed toward them.

  They all stood up as the doctor addressed her grandfather.

  "We've stopped the bleeding," he said. "She's stable."

  "Oh, thank God," she whispered, squeezing her grandfather's h
and. "She'll recover completely?"

  "We'll be able to tell you more tomorrow, but at the moment it's looking good," the doctor replied.

  She could feel her grandfather starting to shake. Before she could move, Barrett came around and put a steadying arm around her grandfather's shoulders.

  "Are you all right?" the doctor asked.

  "I'm just relieved," her grandfather said, allowing Barrett to guide him back into his chair. "I was so scared."

  She gave him a reassuring smile. "Grandma has come this far. She'll make it all the way." She looked back at the doctor. "When can we see her?"

  "She'll be sleeping for several hours. I'd suggest you go home and come back in the morning."

  "No. I need to be here when she wakes up," her grandfather protested. "She can't be here alone."

  "I'll stay," she said immediately. "I'll be with her if she wakes up. You can go home and get some rest and come back in the morning when she's really going to need you, Grandpa. I have to work tomorrow, so tonight will be my shift. What do you say?"

  He gave her a doubtful look. "Are you sure?"

  "I'm positive."

  "I'll drive you home," Barrett offered.

  "All right. I can't argue with both of you," her grandfather said. "But, Doc, you sure she's all right?"

  "She's doing very well," the doctor said. "I don't expect any changes tonight, but, of course, you'll be notified right away if any issues arise. Now, if you'll excuse me…"

  "Thank you," she said, giving the doctor a grateful smile. Then she glanced at Barrett. "My grandfather lives about fifteen minutes away—in the Berkeley Hills. I can give you the address if you want to map it."

  "I can tell him how to get there. I haven't lost my mind, Katie," her grandfather said.

  "Okay then." She looked at Barrett. "I really appreciate this."

  "Why don't you give me your number? I'll check in with you later."

  He pulled out his phone and punched in her number, then helped her grandfather to his feet.

  "You'll call me if she wakes up at all, right?" her grandfather asked again.