Blinded

by E. M. Leya

  "Right, so lucky," Brett grumbled. "You should have let me die."

  I growled, unable to hold my wolf back.

  "Easy, Bayne." Kurt watched me closely. "Brett, I know this is going to be a challenge, but you'll overcome it. My father knew a wolf who was born blind. He had a good life. You will too once you get used to it."

  "I don't want to get used to it." Brett tried to pull back, but Cohen gripped his shoulder, keeping him in place.

  "Hold still. I'm almost done." Cohen finished wrapping the gauze around Brett's head. "Do you think you can eat?"

  Brett shook his head no.

  "Have Corta bring something for both of us, please." I looked at Kurt.

  "Do you want to call your family?" Cohen asked.

  "No, I don't want them to see me like this." Brett pulled away from me.

  My wolf whimpered at the loss of him in our arms. It was shocking how much I needed him beside me. It was overwhelming to have someone suddenly become such a huge part of my life. I wasn't sure how to handle the feelings stirring inside me. I wanted to demand he stay in my arms and I never wanted to let go.

  "When you are ready, you can make the call, but you need to make it, or I will. I can't let your pack wonder what happened to you if you don't make contact. Bridger's family told me you were from the Bear River Pack in Utah, right?"

  Brett didn't answer.

  I was sure Kurt was just letting Brett know that he knew where he'd come from, confirming that he could and would call if Brett didn't.

  "Finding your mate can be a bit overwhelming. I suggest you two rest tonight, then take tomorrow to talk. Don't try and force things." Kurt narrowed his eyes at me. "Let it happen naturally. I know it's hard, but it's the easiest way."

  The easiest way would be for us to rush to the bedroom and commence with the mating ritual right away. I didn't want to wait. I wanted Brett bound to me in every way possible. As hard as it was going to be, Kurt was right. I needed to let Brett take his time with this. The mating ritual wouldn't work unless both wanted it to. I couldn't force this. Brett needed to want me the same way I wanted him, and while I was sure he felt the pull and connection between us, it was clear he wasn't ready to mate.

  I had to wonder what it would have been like if we'd met under different circumstances. If he hadn't been injured and so scared. I'd dreamed of finding my mate, but I'd always seen it as an instant attraction, instant claiming. Scenting each other across a room and rushing off like crazed fools to the nearest place we could consummate our mating.

  "I'll be by in the morning to check on you. Call me if you need anything at all." Cohen stood. "Bayne, there is more gauze and bandages in that bottom drawer should you need to replace the bandage at any point, but keep the eyes covered. You don't want anything getting into the eye sockets."

  "Thanks." I pushed up, then placed my hand on Brett's shoulder. "Let me show you where you can sleep?"

  "Not like I have a choice." Brett slowly stood.

  Kurt gave me a sympathetic look. "Corta will bring food shortly. I'll let you two know if I find out anything more."

  I nodded. "Thanks." Gently placing my hand on Brett's back, I asked him, "how is this going to be easiest for you?"

  "A gun to my head would work."

  I growled and reached for his hand. "I'll lead you."

  I reached down, picked my backpack up off the ground, and opened the door. Ignoring the looks from the other wolves, I led Brett toward one of the bedrooms. I picked one on the main floor, so he didn't have to deal with stairs.

  I needed to think about everything now. I had to think as if I were blind, so I could be one step ahead, making sure Brett would be okay, and things would be as simple for him as I could make them.

  The rooms on the main floor were usually used for prisoners or wolves who were losing control. There were bars on the windows, and the doors were reinforced. It didn't matter. Brett wouldn't see that it wasn't a normal room. There was a bathroom in each room, so we would have all we could need for the night. I just wanted him to rest and try and come to terms with both his blindness and our mating.

  Once in the room, I shut the door. "The bed is about five feet directly in front of you. The bathroom is four feet from the other side of the bed." I wasn't sure what he wanted to do.

  "Thanks." Brett slowly shuffled his feet forward, going to the bed. Once there, he turned and sat down. "I'm sorry you have to babysit me."

  I closed the distance between us in one stride. "I am not babysitting. Don't tell me you don't feel the mating bond between us. You can't ignore it. It's too strong. I never dreamed it would feel this way. I feel like if I am more than ten feet from you I might lose my mind. I don't know how people handle this. I want to kill anyone who gets near you, looks at you, even thinks your name."

  "I feel it, but I'm not going to make you stay with a disabled wolf the rest of your life. Had we met a week ago, I'd give in to what I feel, but now, it's not fair for you to be bound to a blind mate." Brett sighed as he lay back on the bed. "I'm sorry Fate did this to you."

  I climbed over him, straddling him as I braced my hands on either side of his neck. "Let's get one thing straight. I don’t care that you are blind, just like I wouldn’t care if you were deaf, mute or missing your legs. I don't care what condition you are in. You are my mate. That means you are perfect for me just how you are. Fate doesn't get this wrong. It never has. You know your history as well as I do. Fate puts us together. Fate knows what we need and desire. You are for me, I am for you. The sooner you deal with that, the sooner you know I'm not walking away from this, the sooner we can be happy together." I leaned down and licked up the side of his neck, enjoying the swift intake of breath Brett made. "Feel that? It's us. We can't find that feeling with any other. I've searched years for it. Now that I found it, I'm not letting go."

  Brett lay still beneath me. "You can't force me."

  "No, I can't. But I can stay with you and show you just how good it can be between us. I can show you that we are better together than apart. I can wait for you to see what I do."

  Brett laughed. "Don't you get it? I'll never see again. I won't see anything."

  "Not all seeing is done with the eyes." I bent closer. "I want to kiss you."

  "It won't change how I feel." His hands fisted at his side, but he licked his lips as if anticipating my kiss.

  I moved a little closer, just so he could barely feel the whisper of my lips against his own. "I'm going to show you how good we can be." My lips pressed to his and it was like everything that had been missing in my life suddenly snapped into place. The rightness of this was overwhelming.

  Brett had to have felt it too, because his body tensed beneath me, and his arms came up around me, encasing my body as he pulled me down so our bodies were flush. His lips moved against mine, opening as I licked his mouth, seeking entry.

  It took only seconds for us both to harden, our cocks pressing against each other. I fought to keep from grinding against him, reminding myself he'd been injured and needed to recover before we took things too far.

  I forced myself to pull back, my heart racing as I stared down at him. "I'm not going to tell you this is going to be easy, but I am telling you it's right. I'm here with you. I won't leave. Together we'll figure his all out."

  He nodded, but didn't speak.

  I rolled off him, staying close by his side. "I know you're still dealing with being attacked, and I'd be just as scared and angry as you are if it had happened to me. I won't even begin to tell you I understand what you feel, because I don't. I can't. But I do know I am going be by your side as we learn how to get through this. You aren't alone."

  Brett sighed. "Why did you have to show up in my life now?"

  I smiled as I brushed my fingers down his arm. "Probably because you needed me."

  A knock on the door had me climbing out of the bed. "It's probably just Corta with food." I hurried and opened the door.

  Corta grinned at me. "Bayne,
good to see you. Kurt said you and your mate needed to eat. Is it true?"

  I nodded. "It's true, Corta. I found my mate."

  "Thank God. You of all people deserve the happiness that comes from having a mate by your side." She handed the tray of food to me. "I look forward to meeting…" She sniffed hard as if catching his scent. "Him, I look forward to meeting him when he's ready. Just set the dishes outside the door and I'll pick them up later."

  "Thanks, Corta." I wanted to hug her, but with the tray in my hands, I couldn't. "We'll probably be down for breakfast in the morning."

  "It'll be ready." She turned and walked away.

  As I shut the door, I glanced back at the bed to find Brett sitting up. "Think you can follow my voice and come to the table and eat?" I set the tray down on the small table near the window.

  "I'm not very hungry."

  Even though we'd just met, there was enough of a bond between us that I could feel his emotions and some physical aspects of him. He was tired, scared, and hungry. "From what you said, you haven't eaten in days. I don't care if you shift and eat this steak or come over and keep me company and eat in human form, but you need to eat. I'm not going to let you starve yourself. If you'd rather raw meat, I can get that for you too, but I promise that you'll love Corta's porterhouse and her fried potatoes are to die for."

  He hugged his stomach.

  I set the food up on the table and went to him. Bending down in front of him, I cupped his face. "Come eat with me. After, if you're okay with me staying with you, we can shift and let our wolves curl up on the bed together." My wolf was begging to come forward and meet his mate.

  "I can't see to eat. I can't even cut my steak." Brett's voice was a soft whisper filled with shame.

  "You know what? That's okay. It's going to take time. Why don't I set everything on the floor and we can shift to eat? Then you don't have to worry about table manners or cutting your steak into perfect chunks. Hell, as far as I'm concerned you can pick it up and eat with your hands if you want." I just wanted to know he had food in his stomach before we went to sleep.

  "I'd like to shift."

  "Okay, let me fill the bowl with water for us, then I'll set the food down. We'll shift together."

  He blew out a long, nervous breath. "Thanks."

  I set about getting everything ready. Sooner or later he would have to learn how to do things, but tonight, with everything so fresh, I didn't want to push anything. I was happy just having him with me. After a good meal and a good night's sleep, hopefully things would seem better in the morning.

  CHAPTER THREE

  Brett

  I woke up in a full panic, unsure where I was and confused because I couldn't see anything. My wolf stood, legs wobbling on an uneven surface as I tried to sense where I was.

  I jumped back as another wolf nuzzled his nose against my neck, but that only confused me more. I stepped away and went falling, hitting the ground hard. I growled as I rose up again, trying to understand why the world was dark.

  The other wolf howled softly, a calming noise that had my wolf titling his head trying to understand. The other wolf was trying to reassure me, but nothing made sense. I turned, hoping to see something, but still only found darkness.

  A soft whine from the other wolf, then his tongue on my face had me taking a deep breath. I caught his scent, paying attention to him as I realized he was my mate. Slowly, memories started to hit me, and I lowered myself to the ground whimpering as my mate curled up beside me, continuing to lick over my head, softly yelping to calm me.

  I pressed against the wolf, finding that his closeness calmed me. Bayne, that was his name. He'd taken care of me. Helped me. I slowly started to relax.

  Bayne moved away from me, and as I went to follow him, he nudged me away. I whimpered, feeling rejection from my mate.

  "I just wanted to shift so I could talk to you." Bayne's hands were suddenly running through my fur, his lips kissing the top of my head. "You don't have to shift unless you want to. I'm going to get us breakfast in a minute. You need to be careful. The bandage came off when you shifted last night. Don't touch your eyes, okay?"

  I pressed against him, enjoying the way he held my wolf in his arms.

  "You're a beautiful wolf. I'm so lucky that you're mine," Bayne told me.

  I hated how instantly my bond formed with him. I'd dreamed about finding my mate for years, but the fact it happened now, right after I'd been attacked and blinded, made me want to cry. I didn't want to be dependent on anyone, force anyone to take care of me, but as my mate, Bayne didn't have a choice. It would be a need for him, something he would do without thought. He didn't get a choice.

  My parents were mated. I'd grown up seeing and understanding the bond between them. It was something that I always wanted. The difference in the relationships of a mated couple compared to an unmated one was immense. I wanted that complete bond. The full oneness that came from having a mate, but now, with me being blind, I hated to force Bayne to have to deal with my issues. It was like he had been cheated out of having a whole mate.

  I took a deep breath as I rubbed against his chest. Taking a minute to enjoy the feeling of my mate's arms around me. I'd dated a lot, had a lot of casual sex, been intimate with many, but nothing compared to the feel of Bayne's touch. I was torn, one minute wanting to die, the next minute wanting to explore this mating bond with Bayne and live the dream I'd always imagined.

  Stepping away from him, I forced myself to shift. I sat on the floor for a moment, wishing I could look up and see what he looked like. Hating that when he looked at me, he was forced to see the ugliness of two hollowed eye sockets.

  Bayne sat down beside me, his hand pressed to the small of my back. "I never thought I'd find a mate, but you are more than I could ever have imagined being blessed with." He kissed my shoulder. "How are you feeling today?"

  "Bruised, but better. The pain is gone." I licked my lips, thirsty. "Other than my eyes, is there any visible damage?"

  Bayne ran his hands over my skin as if inspecting it. "Not that I can see. You're perfect."

  "Hardly, I'm sorry this happened to you." I hated how I wanted to lean into his touch, feel him beside me.

  "Happened to me? You're sorry we found each other? I didn't think Fate would ever bless me with a mate. I'm stunned that we found each other. Excited to get to know you, share our lives together."

  I shook my head. "I'm blind."

  "I know, and we'll work through that. I'll help you adapt."

  "You don't get it, do you? I can't run with you, hunt with you, I can't even look up and see what you look like."

  Bayne moved, taking my hands in his. "Your heart will know what I look like, but for now, you'll have to use your hands to see me." He placed my hands against the side of his face before releasing them. "Touch me, Brett. See your mate."

  My palms pressed against the side of his beard, my fingertips near the corners of his eyes. I took a deep breath, trying to imagine him as I slowly moved my fingers over his face, through his beard, then back up again and through his hair. "What color is your hair?"

  "Dark brown. My eyes are brown too." He reached out and held my hips as I continued to slide my hands down his body, over his chest, running my fingertips through the thick mass of hair that covered him. His stomach tightened as I touched him there, then I slid my hands to his hips, feeling my way to his thighs, liking the muscle I felt beneath my palms.

  "Tell me about you."

  Bayne laughed. "I'm never good at this. Um, I was born here with the Terrin Pack. Both my parents have passed, but I have a grandfather who lives in Bozeman. He is the only family I have left."

  "How come he is with the Bozeman pack, but you're here?"

  "He married into the pack, but my father met my mother and she was part of the Terrin Pack, so he moved here to be with her."

  "Were they mated?" I brought my hands back up to Bayne's chest, pressing my hands to him.

  "No. I'm the first in my f
amily's history that I know of to have found their mate." Bayne gently pulled me onto his lap. He ran his nose up my neck, then kissed a sensitive area right below my ear that had me sucking in a breath. "I didn't think I'd get lucky enough to ever find my mate either. You were the last thing I expected to find when I got here last night."

  I tried to ignore the way his touch made me feel. "Then you walk in and find Fate has given you a worthless mate, one who can't do anything to make your life better." I lowered my head to his chest. "I hate how hard it is to ignore this. The more I'm with you, the more I feel connected to you."

  "That's normal. It's supposed to be that way. I'm looking forward to being able to feel your emotions, share feelings, connect in a way we can't with any other." Bayne kissed my cheek. "You're not a worthless mate. You are my mate. You are my other half. I've watched my friends mate and I want that. I don't care if you're blind. It doesn't mean we can't run together, hunt together. It means we have to adapt to all that."

  "What if I don't want to adapt? Fuck, if only you hadn't walked in when you did." I sighed, still curled up against him.

  "Would you seriously end your life over this? Would you hurt me, your family, your friends?" Bayne caressed my back. "We'll figure this out. It's new, it's scary, and it's going to be different, but we will find a way to make it work." He lifted my chin with his fingers, then kissed me softly. "Do you want to go out there and eat or stay in here?"

  "Everyone will stare." I wasn't even sure how I could eat without seeing what was on my plate. "Can we stay here?"

  "Of course, for now." Bayne pressed another soft kiss to my lips. "Let me go get us some clothes and breakfast. I'm sure Cohen will be in to see you soon too." Bayne stood before taking my hand and pulling me up with him. "Bridger's family will be here today too. They'll probably want to talk to you. And, you should think about calling your family. I'm sure they are worried."

  I nodded, but didn't respond. I wasn't sure I was ready to talk to them, but Bayne was right, I owed it to Bridger's family to face them. I was the last one to see their son alive. "Thank you. I know this is hard, and not how meeting your mate should go, but I'm glad you're here to help me."