by Ember Casey
William nods. “My sister is right. And when Andrew’s head returns—if it returns—he’ll be the first to agree.”
Sophia squeezes the top of my arm. “But you must attend the ball tomorrow before you leave. You’ll be masked—no one will need to know it’s you. You can spend the entire evening dancing with my brother and no one needs to know, not even Reginald. Besides, I expect that putrid excuse for a prince will be returning to his own country now that he’s had his revenge on our family.”
William takes a step toward us, almost as though he thinks we’re being overheard. “We can wait until we have the rights to the scepter in hand. And wait until King Maximilian has signed away his claim to the Amhurst Valley and given it to my father. After that, you’ll be free to be with Andrew again in public. You can continue your courtship. I know my brother will want that. It’s just going to take some time.”
I nod. It’s just going to take some time. If Andrew will wait for me after what I’ve done to him. And it’s that thought that makes my stomach turn with guilt again. He won’t want to wait for me. Even if he does find it in his heart to understand that I did what I thought was right for Montovia, he won’t want to be with me after what I did to him tonight.
“I appreciate the help. From both of you.” I glance between the two of them. “I really do. But I made my bed and now I have to lie in it. I can’t stay here—I should get my things.”
“At least take the dress with you, Victoria.” Sophia looks as though she might cry. “We…we can find a hotel for you to stay at in the city. You should at least stay until after the ball. Please?”
I’m not sure what comes over me, but I nod in agreement. “Okay.” It isn’t as though I’m in a huge hurry to get on another plane again—ever—even after everything that’s happened in the past few days. “But I can’t stay here. I just need to get my things.”
I look down at my toes—I can’t explain the feeling in my gut other than it being an overwhelming guilt I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to shake.
I finally look up at the two after a long moment. “If you see Andrew tonight, please tell him again how sorry I am. Tell him…tell him I finally understand how it must have felt for him all these years to have put the needs of his country ahead of his own.”
Our heads all turn at the sound of shouting coming from the courtyard. Someone is running toward the palace—it’s too dark and too far away to see who. But then another shout comes from behind the person and another figure comes into view. And as they near the palace, it’s all too obvious what is going on.
Andrew is chasing Reginald and is yelling at him at the top of his lungs. “Come back here, traitor! I’m going to kill you!”
Andrew
That coward won’t even face me like a man.
I got in two good punches—and dodged two of his—before Reginald realized we were unmatched. Under normal circumstances, things might have been more even. But anger has given me a new strength, and apparently the bastard can’t take it.
I sprint after him toward the palace. I don’t know where he thinks he’s going—does he mean to hide from me in my own home? Maybe he thinks the Royal Guard will come out and break us up again.
Not before I get another hit in.
He’s fast, but I’m desperate. I catch up to him in the courtyard, and I grab him by the collar, pulling him back toward me.
“You coward,” I growl through clenched teeth, readying my fist to strike him again. “I swear, if you utter one—”
“Andrew.”
The voice is like a bolt straight through my chest. Victoria. My heart stops, and my hand freezes in midair. I can’t think. I can only wait, breathless, for that beautiful voice to come again.
Reginald sees his opening. While I’m still stunned, trying to determine whether I’ve actually heard Victoria’s voice, he twists around in my grip and throws a punch at me. His knuckles collide with my cheek, and I stumble back. Stars dance across my vision.
Instantly, the rage overtakes me again. I blink away the stars and lunge at him, and my quick recovery gives me the advantage. I throw him down on the ground and press a knee into his chest. This time he’s not getting away. This time—
“Andrew, stop.”
This time her voice is closer. Again, just the sound of it stuns me for a moment.
She’s here.
I shift more of my weight onto Reginald. This time I don’t intend to give him an opening. When I look up, I see Victoria coming down the steps, and my heart sings at the sight of her.
She’s still here.
The relief is so strong I could almost weep. But I keep my emotions in check as she approaches me.
“Victoria.” I’m sure the relief and joy in my voice are plain for all to hear.
She pauses some steps away, as if she’s afraid to come too close. “Andrew, don’t make this worse than it already is.”
I glance down at Reginald. He grunts and squirms, trying to get free, but I just lean more weight onto him.
When I glance back at Victoria, she’s looking at him, too. In fact, I’d swear she’s avoiding my gaze.
“Victoria,” I say. “Fuck whatever arrangement you had with this coward.”
She glances at me again, and in the light from the lanterns I see tears gleaming in her eyes.
“Andrew…” She shakes her head. “I can’t. I can’t do that.”
What the hell does she mean she can’t? What does she think she’s doing to me now?
“I know how much this country means to you,” she goes on. “I know how much you’d sacrifice for Montovia. This is for your people. If I refused the offer, if Montovia lost one of its treasured symbols and the Amhurst Valley because of my selfishness… You might be all right with the idea of it now, because your emotions are running high. But in time you’d only come to resent me for it. I won’t let that happen. I’m doing the right thing, and we both know it.”
“This is not the right thing,” I say. “This is the opposite of right. And for what it’s worth, Maximilian is the only one who can sign over the rights to that valley. Reginald is just toying with us.” I dig my knee into his chest for good measure, and he grunts and tries unsuccessfully to push me off him.
“That’s not exactly true,” the bastard says, a little breathlessly. “My father has granted me a certain amount of diplomatic responsibility. If I tell him we’ve come to an agreement over the valley, he’ll stand by my decision.”
“He’ll blindly accept that you gave away such a valuable piece of land to spite me?” I demand.
“I wouldn’t put it to him in such terms,” he says. “But trust me, the deal I made with Victoria is perfectly valid, and I intend to uphold my end as long as she upholds hers.”
This is ridiculous. I can’t believe it’s come to this.
Victoria is suddenly just beside me, and I look up into her eyes. A tear has leaked down her cheek, but she quickly wipes it away.
“I’m leaving, Andrew,” she says quietly.
My heart nearly stops again. “You can’t.”
“I have to. I…I need time to think.”
“I don’t accept this bargain you two made,” I say, glancing between Victoria and Reginald. “I refuse.”
“The decision isn’t yours,” she says. “It’s mine, and I’ve made it.”
She moves away from me, and I start to stand. Reginald takes the opportunity to escape me, and he scrambles to his feet.
“You hear that?” he says, smirking. “I’ve won, Andrew. The game is over.”
I know that now isn’t the time to lose my temper again, but I can’t help myself. I spin and punch him again, hitting him in the jaw so hard that he falls back.
“Andrew!”
This time it’s not Victoria that calls my name—it’s William. And with him are a dozen of the Royal Guard.
Shit.
“My father will hear of this,” Reginald says, his voice thick with pain. “And so will the r
est of the world—they’ll hear exactly how the heir to the Montovian throne treats his honored guests.”
I want to charge him again, but suddenly there are guards between him and me, and a couple of them grab my arms, restraining me. William is beside me.
“Let it go,” my brother says. “Don’t make this worse than it already is.”
“You know what that bastard has done—”
“I do. And mashing him to a bloody pulp won’t change anything. It’ll only make you look worse.”
He’s right, damn him. The guards on either side of me seem to realize I’m no longer going to charge Reginald, because they release me again.
That bastard can wait. Right now, I need to find Victoria.
I turn, but someone grabs me again—this time it’s William.
“Let her go, Brother,” he says. “Trust me.”
“I will not let her go.” I scan the courtyard for her, but I don’t see her anywhere—has she already disappeared?
“Let her go,” William says again. “She’s made her decision. Trust her.”
“She was tricked. She—”
“She’s an intelligent woman. She made the decision she thought was best for both of you.”
No. I won’t let her make this decision—not for Montovia and not for me.
I break free of his arm and run through the courtyard to the head of the road down to the city. I’ll stop her. I’ll—
I pause, looking down at the brightly lit streets below. The sound of music and laughter reaches me.
But Victoria is nowhere to be seen on the road down into the city. I have no idea how she disappeared so quickly, but I know the truth deep in my chest—she’s gone.
Victoria
It’s strange how being cooped up in a tiny hotel room for only a day has given me the worst case of cabin fever I’ve ever had in my life. I did as William and Sophia asked—I allowed them to put me up in a small boutique hotel room on the other side of the city, far away from the festival and the crowds.
And about as far away from Andrew as I can be while still in the same city.
From my window, I see the palace in the distance, though I’ve been trying to avoid looking at it. Even thinking about the palace makes my stomach churn with a guilt I’ve never felt. The only thing that’s made me feel even remotely better in the past twenty-four hours was the headline in today’s newspaper, announcing the return of the Amhurst Valley rights to Montovia.
Reginald might be a huge prick, but he’s an honest one.
I did the right thing for this country. I probably did the right thing for Andrew, too, though nothing about what’s happened feels right on a personal level. At least now I understand why he’s had to make the sacrifices he has—I know exactly what it feels like to give up your life for the good of your country.
It sucks.
I’m not really sure what I’m still doing here. I promised Sophia I’d stay through the masquerade ball, but I can’t be with Andrew there. She explained how the royal family does its big reveal at midnight and the rest of the citizens follow, all removing their masks.
It’s too risky for me to attend. Reginald will almost certainly be there, and he’ll almost certainly be watching, making sure I’m holding up my end of the bargain.
It’s the right thing to do for this country.
I have to remind myself of it constantly. It would be so easy—too easy—to go running back to Andrew and have him take me in his arms. But it would undo all the good that’s come from my decision. And for as much as it is tearing me apart from the inside, there’s a small part of me that knows I’ll be okay because I did what I did for the right reasons.
It has to be how Andrew justified his whole pageant thing. How he’s justified everything stupid he’s done.
I’m about to bounce off the walls of my room when there’s finally a knock on my door. Sophia is there with my gown in her hand.
She walks through the doorway, edging around me before I can extend her an invitation. I peek out into the hallway before I close the door—there’s a part of me that hopes she brought Andrew with her, but a bigger part of me knows she would never risk it.
Sophia frowns. “He’s not here, if that’s what you’re looking for.”
I nod. “I know. I just…”
She clasps my forearm for a moment before releasing me. “He’ll be there tonight, though. It’s why you must come—”
“It’s why I must not come. I mean…I’ll go. I’ll watch. But I’m not going to let myself get caught up in the party. I’ll be gone before everyone removes their masks at midnight.”
She frowns and searches my eyes. “Is that really what you want?”
“Of course it isn’t what I want. But it’s the only option. Reginald and his father already announced they were going to turn over the rights to your valley. You don’t really think they did that out of the kindness of their hearts, do you?”
She pauses for a moment. “No. I don’t think anything of the sort. But I do know William has been working on another angle—”
“No more angles.” I shake my head. “No more tricks. No more games. No more drama. I’m done with it. I did what I needed to do. I did what was best to keep the peace between your two countries. And I’m sorry I ever got caught up in it. I should have just stayed in Oregon—I should have never let Andrew talk me into coming back here.”
Sophia looks like she might cry. “I know you don’t mean that, Victoria. You’re in love with my brother. And he’s very much in love with you. I…I don’t know very much about love. But I know it when I see it. I see it with my parents. I see it with Leopold and Elle. And I see it with you…with you and Andrew.”
I can only shake my head. “And while that might be true, sometimes things just aren’t meant to be.”
“Perhaps not.” She stands taller, probably trying to hide the emotion I can still see in her eyes. “I’ve brought your dress.” She nods toward the garment bag draped over her arm.
“As long as the mask covers my face and no one can recognize me, I don’t think the dress matters—”
I’m interrupted by the crestfallen look on her face, and I try to cover my words as quickly as I can. “What I mean is, I’m sure it’s a beautiful gown. The one you brought me before was so lovely.”
“Yes…” She’s trying to cover the pain in her voice, and my stomach twists with guilt as I realize how I’ve insulted her. “I’ve had to make a few adjustments to this one. Your costumes were meant to match.” Her voice falls to barely above a whisper. “Yours and Andrew’s.”
I nod and take the garment bag from her. “I’m sure it’s beautiful, Sophia. And I do appreciate everything you’ve done for me.” I reach out and squeeze her forearm. “Everything. And I mean that.”
She nods.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to insult you. I…I’m just—”
“You’re heartbroken.” She looks at me for a long moment. “You should know, though, Victoria… We all are. For both you and my brother.”
I can’t really say anything to that. I suppose she’s right.
She motions to the door. “I should return to the palace. A carriage will be waiting for you in an hour. I…” She frowns again. “I’ll try to find you.”
I want to tell her not to bother, but I don’t. I nod instead. “Okay.”
She nods in return. “Please, Victoria, promise you’ll go. I can’t promise anything is going to happen… I can’t promise a fairy tale. But…” Her shoulders fall. “Please promise you’ll go.”
I look at her for a long moment. I can’t deny I’ve thought about skipping the entire thing to find my way to the train station instead. But I did promise her I’d wear her gown. And I would like to see Andrew one last time, even if I can’t speak to him. Even if I can’t dance with him or hold him or have him hold me. I need to see him one last time, if only for the closure it will bring me.
So I nod at her again. “Okay, Sophia. I promise.
”
And I might be a monster for having done what I’ve done to Andrew. But I’m at least an honest monster.
Andrew
I stare down at the mask in my hands. It took me nearly an hour to get dressed for the masquerade ball, and I still haven’t convinced myself to go. I don’t have the energy or the will for anything—I haven’t eaten since Victoria disappeared last night. I hardly slept. I know that with my father incapacitated it’s up to me to work out the official terms regarding the land rights of the Amhurst Valley with Maximilian, but I can hardly bring myself to do that, even though it is the one bright lining of this entire ordeal.
The cost was too damn high.
The people expect me at the masquerade tonight. After everything that’s happened—with my father, with Reginald, with the scepter—they need me there. Now, more than ever, I need to show them strength. And my entire family knows it. Sophia dropped by twice this afternoon to badger me and squeeze out a promise that I would attend.
My sister knows more than she’s telling me. William, too—my brother has been mysteriously absent around the palace today. He’s up to something, but I can’t find the energy to investigate.
I can’t even find the energy to put on this mask.
I cross over to the window and look out at the city. The sun has just set, and the city is more alive than ever—the glow of lanterns makes the buildings look like they are washed in gold, and I can even see the faint flickering of the giant bonfire they’ve lit in the Main Square. If I opened the window, I’d no doubt hear the sounds of revelry, but the thought of such cheerfulness only makes my stomach curdle.
To think—this used to be one of my favorite days of the year. For one night, I was just another citizen of Montovia. I could lose myself in the celebration, be free of all responsibility for a few hours.