Ruin Me Please

by Nichole Matthews

  Breathing fast and hard Declan struggled to respond, “Blue, definitely blue like the color of your eyes.” His voice was thick with desire as he ran his hands hungrily down her sides.

  Laying Poppy back, he leaned over capturing her mouth with a groan, her lips so soft and warm. With exquisite thoroughness, he ravished her mouth.

  Sensations flooded through her.

  Pressing into her, his body tightened painfully.

  Poppy met his demanding kiss without hesitation, clinging to him, arching so close she could feel his heart beating against her breasts.

  “I have been longing to be alone with you all day,” Declan growled.

  Slowly he lowered the bodice of her gown and feasted his eyes on the perfection before him, watching as her rosy nipples pebbled with desire. Gripped by a primal fever, he wanted to touch all of her, his fingers tracing a fiery trail down her throat over her naked flesh until it rested in the vulnerable hollow where her pulse pounded erratically.

  Poppy stiffened at the new sensations, taking a ragged breath she cried out in anticipation. Her eyes filled with innocent wonder as she watched him lower his to her breasts.

  Dipping his head, he traced the peak of her breast with his tongue, taking her ripe flesh firmly into his mouth. He suckled her taut nipple, swirling his tongue around her scorching sweetness until she cried out with a raw uncertain sound.

  Nevertheless, that didn’t stop him from continuing to devour her as a starving man would devour a crumb of bread.

  The hint of his whiskers scraping against her sensitized flesh shot a wicked thrill straight through to her core as a moist heat pooled between her thighs. Restless, the decadence of his firm lips on her sizzling flesh caused Poppy to cry out again. Her intense craving for more of these sensations, she held his head tightly to her breast willingly surrendering to the intense dark pleasures. Closing her eyes, she moaned in ecstasy. She arched shamelessly against him trying to figure out how to beg him for more.

  His breath shallow and fast he lowered his hand until he could wrap it around her ankle, teasing his way up her leg.

  She tried not to squirm; squeezing her eyes shut to ease this overwhelming desire, bewildered by her inexplicable loss of control, so rich, so potent that it took control of her senses. Poppy felt a rush of coolness when little by little he slowly ran his calloused hands up every snowy inch of her slender legs past her garters with tiny pink ribbons, pushing her skirts up to her waist. Poppy felt only a moment’s hesitation before she surrendered to the sensations.

  Declan knew he was testing the limits of his willpower, but his need was too intense. He had already pictured this moment in his mind many times. Groaning deep in his throat with satisfaction, he could have cried out for wanting her. Raising his head, he watched as the firelight played across her face. The pull of his gaze slowly brought Poppy from her passion-filled daze, then he tugged her closer, crushing her curves to his hard body. Fascinated, he captured her mouth in a frenzied kiss. She opened her mouth under his, making way for him to slide his tongue deep into her mouth, and she greeted his assault fervently.

  Shocked, her eyes flew open when his fingers found her secret place, the place where no one had ever touched her before. His long fingers rifling through the dewy curls covering her feminine secrets sent ripples of delicious tension through her.

  A breathy sigh escaped her, wiggling her hips searching for something. The tension slowly building within her, his steady stroking made a sizzling heat flood her from head to toe.

  His member throbbed, aching to escape the confines of his breeches. Emboldened by her reaction, he traced her seam, delving inside her folds to find the hidden nub of her desire making her cry out in shock at the intimacy.

  “So wet,” he groaned into her throat. He lifted his head to watch, enthralled by the sight of her fighting the storm about to break as he caressed her shamelessly.

  Lashes tipped with gold fanned out against the curve of her cheek. She flushed with desire, taking deep gulping breaths. The heat rose like an uncontrollable fever and with each stroke the temperature increased.

  Beads of sweat dotted his forehead. The exquisite torture of bringing her to fulfillment for the first time was almost more than he had bargained for. He gritted his teeth in agony. The potency of this privilege was overwhelming. He was barely hanging on to his thin thread of control. Running his tongue back and forth over her puckered nipple almost putting her over the edge, but it was nothing compared to the feel of his mouth as it replaced his hand. Licking, then pressing his tongue into her heat, tasting deeply.

  She writhed urgently beneath him, thrashing and bucking as pleasure washed over her. A strangled sob of wonder escaped her and Declan hurriedly captured her rapturous cries with a deep kiss.

  Taking her in his arms, he gently placed her on his lap, stroking her back, whispering soft words in her ear. He would never forget the sight she made as long as he lived.

  Sighing languidly, Poppy crumpled boneless in his arms. “Heavens,” she sighed, taking slow even breaths, savoring the feel of this big, virile man, gazing deeply into his eyes, her face aglow in the golden firelight lightly flushed with desire.

  Laugh lines fanned out from the corners of his eyes. “Yes indeed.” Declan’s laborious breathing echoed the cadence of Poppy’s. His expression turned thoughtful as his hands smoothed over her back in soothing circles.

  “I did not realize…I had no idea…It never occurred to me that people did that.” She heaved a deep sigh, trying to catch her breath. She slowly breathed in and out for several long minutes before she spoke again, “You do realize that Parker will kill you if he finds us like this.” The words burst out of her mouth, causing Poppy to chuckle quietly.

  “I have already been forewarned,” Declan, mentioned still stroking her back. “Now you must marry me.”

  Baffled, she pulled away in order to straight into his eyes. “Is that what this was all about?” She frowned. “You wished to force my hand in marriage? I told you I am only going to marry for love.” Her brow puckered in frustration. “I am fairly certain that you cannot boast true love for me so soon.” She cocked her eyebrow.

  Leaning over, Declan gently kissed her forehead. “No Poppy, I cannot admit to true love at this time, a strong case of lust most definitely.” He grinned wickedly. “But under the circumstances, what we just shared is tantamount to a betrothal. For someone like you, these intimacies are to be shared in a marriage bed.”

  “If that is the truth, then why did we just share them on the floor of my brother’s library?” She quirked her brow, her chin lifted.

  Declan snorted, but made no answer.

  “Then I suggest we return to our rooms for the night before we are forced into something we both do not want.” Poppy stretched like a kitten, sighing contentedly.

  Standing, his strong arms still cradled her close. Declan strode quickly to the door and quietly searched the hall to insure they were indeed alone before carrying her up the stairs to her room, not releasing her until she inside her door. Leaning down, he cradled her chin, kissing her so softly Poppy felt as if she were dreaming.

  “Go to sleep my angel,” he whispered, slowly backing out of her room. Pivoting, he was walking towards his room when he heard Poppy softly call, “Sweet dreams, Declan.” Looking over his shoulder, he caught her blowing him a kiss before she quietly closed her door.

  His goal of marrying her became exceedingly clear tonight. He was going to have to be very clever indeed to win Poppy’s hand.

  He suffered no illusions.

  She was his.

  ***

  Lying on his bed naked, Declan could not remove the smile on his face. The look in her eyes as she found her release now permanently imprinted on his mind. Her face flushed. Remembering the sweet sounds she made caused him to groan. He was painfully aware that he had unselfishly given her pleasure. He was obsessed with a beautiful, young, not so innocent woman anymore who was full of passion. He s
hook his head in frustration.

  His palms burned with the memory of his hands on her naked flesh. He was so hot and aroused, he was sweating, smoldering with enough pent up frustration he thought he might burst.

  Kicking off his blankets to cool himself, Declan slid his hand over his heavily muscled chest imagining Poppy’s small, soft hands sliding over him. His mouth went dry at the thought of her plump ripe mouth gliding over his body.

  He jerked with need. He could not sleep like this, realizing his manhood stood fully erect. It had been years since he had to resort to pleasuring himself, but the ache was too great. He needed this release.

  He closed his fist around his straining cock. Slowly rubbing his hand up and down his shaft imagining Poppy’s tight, hot sheath surrounding him until his breath came in short shallow bursts. He imagined her slick wet heat as he touched himself. He could not remember when he felt something so uncontrollable. Beads of sweat formed on his forehead. As his hand began moving faster and faster, his hips jerked as a rush of pleasurable release washed over him. He pressed his lips together, gritting his teeth to silence the loud moan as he came violently in his hand. Deep rasping breaths escaped him as his heart rate began to slow.

  Rising from his bed, Declan cleaned himself off. Shaking his head as he dragged his hand roughly through his hair, laying back on top of his bedcovers, still heavily aroused. He knew he had brought himself a measure of sexual release, but he would not be sated until Poppy was his.

  He laughed. At either Allingham Park or his townhouse in London, he would have easily been able to find a warm willing body to take care of his baser needs, but now it seemed he only wanted Poppy.

  Looking back now, he realized how lonely he had been before coming to Rosebriar. He was convinced that he had only been living half a life before. He had known since the death of his brother that he would have to marry. It was his duty to produce an heir and possibly a spare. Not one of the women of his past had pressed him to think seriously about that institution until now. Until now, his freedom had appeared too valuable. Was he truly free?

  Rubbing his hand over his face, he suddenly felt very tired, but also very much alive. Staring at the ceiling, Declan fell asleep with a satisfied smile on his face.

  CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

  Absence from those we love

  Is self from self—a deadly

  Banishment

  A Midsummer Night’s Dream

  *William Shakespeare

  What have you done?” Poppy burst into Parker’s study and stood in front of his desk. She had reached her wits ends. She believed women to live by their emotions, or so men would have them believe, but now she realized that it was truly men who had no control. Men who lived by passion without thought or without reason of the consequences.

  Parker sat back. “I beg your pardon?”

  “Where is Declan?” She swallowed and looked at her hands, trying to keep her tears locked inside. “Did you run him off?”

  “I’ve done no such thing.” He said, lifting his hands.

  “No one has seen him all day.”

  “Perhaps he has no desire to be found?”

  Poppy stood staring at her brother as if he had sprouted a second head.

  “When did you last see him?”

  “Last night.” Her voice was shaking badly and she tried to cover it by clearing her throat.

  “As I recall, he arrived home quite late last night.” Parker’s eyes bore into Poppy’s searching for what she wasn’t saying.

  “I ran in to him quite unexpectedly after our performance.” She shrugged.

  “Poppy?”

  Poppy skirted the side of Parker’s desk and stood beside him. She blinked some more, desperate for the tears and the lump in her throat to recede. “Please find him.”

  ***

  Declan sat at a corner table in the shadows, a full days growth of beard marring his generally smooth shaven jaw. He nursed the same pint of ale he had started well over an hour ago. It didn’t matter. He had already drowned his racing thoughts with enough ale to kill a normal sized man but he had to put some distance between them before he convinced himself that he was truly good enough for her when he so obviously wasn’t. For the past few days, in the face of his undying lust, he’d managed to convince himself again and again that he was not doing anything wrong, then the library occurred.

  How had he let things proceed so far? He wasn’t used to denying himself, he also wasn’t into seducing innocent virgins.

  And that was exactly what she was. And innocent. A virgin. She was young. She barely knew anything of the world. The tragedies. The sacrifices one was forced to make at times. She needed gentile living with wildflowers at her fingertips. Not a man hardened by his inability to forgive himself and move forward. What was shocking him to the core, what was at the heart of the matter, was that he no longer wanted to fight his feelings. He no longer wanted a different woman in his bed night after night. He wanted but one and there was the rub.

  His head fell forward and he sighed. A deep sigh that he felt all the way to his toes. He should have listened to Parker and left his sister alone. When had he lost control of his discipline? And now here he was alone, unable to gain control of his emotions, and most definitely unable to gain control of his cock.

  “I didn’t ask for company,” Declan said without bothering to raise his head from where he stared at the time-scarred table.

  “Good thing I didn’t ask your permission.” Seymour slid down in his chair after lifting his finger to indicate he needed a drink.

  He glanced up when someone sat in the chair opposite him, not bothering to smile, allowing his scowl to remain a prominent fixture upon his visage. “Why must you hound me, Seymour?” Declan lifted his pint and took a lusty swallow. His pewter mug made a loud thud as he set it hard on the table, wiping the foam from his upper lip with the sleeve of his costly jacket.

  Seymour’s brow rose disdainfully. “Dudley will not be pleased you are abusing your coat so egregiously.” He was surprised to see how drawn Hawksley’s face was and the puffy redness that surrounded his fuzzy eyes.

  “You and Dudley can go to the very devil where you have sprung.”

  Seymour bit back a smile. “Because you’re acting like an ass.” He lifted his brow at Declan’s disregard for his attire and his atrocious attitude. “Poppy has turned the entire household upside down seeking your whereabouts.”

  “She needs to stay as far away from me as she can.”

  “She will do that of her own accord with you pushing her away if you do not cease with feeling sorry for yourself.”

  Declan was quiet for a second while he sipped his beer and considered the benefits of lying to his friend. “I took advantage of the chit.”

  “Excuse me?”

  Declan’s voice low, laced with angst. “I’ll not repeat myself.”

  “Then perhaps you would be more comfortable repeating yourself to me?”

  Declan groaned at the sound of Parker’s voice. He turned toward the third intruder at his once tiny table of solitude.

  “Goddamn it, Hawk,” Parker growled. “We had an agreement no one would be dishonoring my sisters.” Parker leaned down, palms flat on the table, nose to nose with Declan. “Give me one reason why I shouldn’t beat the shit out of you?”

  Parker’s gaze chilled him to the bone. “I love her.”

  “Then you bloody well better do something about it.” Parker growled at him in warning. Perhaps after the haze of alcohol has dissipated, you might use the brain God gave you and quit this infernal whining and crying.” Parker narrowed his eyes on Declan. “Grow up,” he added before he turned and stomped his way out of the tavern.

  CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

  Doubt thou the stars are fire,

  Doubt that the sun doth move,

  Doubt truth to be a liar,

  But never doubt I love.

  Hamlet

  *William Shakespeare

  Two days late
r Poppy stepped from her room only to stop at the sight of Declan leaning back; one shoulder resting against the wall across from her bedchamber with his arms crossed over his chest as if he hadn’t just disappeared without a word. She was tired, tense, and too aware of him which only added to her ire.

  Hearing the door unlatch, he straightened anticipating his first glimpse of her for the day. He knew he was acting like a complete fool but he didn’t care. She was a vision in soft pink sprigged muslin and it did nothing to ease his attempt at indifference, especially when she visibly stiffened at the sight of him. “Good morning, beautiful.” He offered her a tentative smile, not certain what her reception might be after he ran off with his tail between his legs.

  The deep sound of his greeting was seductive as she emerged from her room. Her pulse leapt at the velvet timbre of his voice she looked up. Her deep blue eyes traveled the length of him, assessing the lean, well-muscled, boot-encased legs that were in front of her until finally reaching the breathtaking emerald eyes that seemingly held hers captive.

  He felt an instantaneous heat when he locked gazes with her. Just as he suspected, the sun rose the moment she bestowed him with one of her breathtaking smiles. How could he have thought otherwise? A wider grin spread over his lips when he glimpsed her charming dimple peeping out. He was still amazed at how the sight of her caused his heart to race.

  He stared at her rose pink bowed lips that begged for his kiss, feeling a lump form in his throat at the uncontrollable physical response that came as a sweet shock.

  A slow flush covered her face as memories from the library surfaced. She attempted to subdue the restless sensations that had settled in the pit of her stomach knowing her feelings were there for anyone to decipher. Irritation rose. How could she be happy to see him when he held little concern for her feelings?