Carlos: A Zambrano Family Novel

by Deici, Olivia

  My grin grew wider still.

  “She's an amazing woman. I'm lucky as hell to have her.”

  We continued talking, heading towards the office. Once there, the receptionist nodded to us to go to the conference room.

  “I’ll stay back and wait for her.”

  Tomás shook his head and waved me over. “Come. We can wait a few minutes so that you can see the woman who puts that smile on your face. “

  I slapped his back. “Thanks, man.”

  Tomás was about Pop’s age, only while my father looked younger, Tomás looked his age, maybe a tad older. The man looked tired. I suppose the stress he was under because of his son’s condition didn't help.

  The medical assistant knocked on the door before opening it for us.

  The infamous conference room.

  It would always hold fond memories for me. You know, the one where I'd locked the door and fucked her on the very same table we were going to sit at.

  “Dr. Leiderman is coming now. Dr. Zavala is here with your son, Mr. Valladares.”

  The assistant closed the door as Cari turned to look at us.

  “What are you doing here!”

  She excused herself from Emiliano and walked towards me.

  “I'm sorry to interrupt. Just wanted to give these to you. I'm taking you out to dinner.”

  She smiled at me, but when she turned towards Tomás, her smile faltered. Confused, I looked at Tomás, who was gripping a chair to not fall.

  “Sir, are you alright? Sir?”

  He'd gone paler than Emiliano.

  “Dad?” Emiliano rose to go to him.

  Cari buzzed for the assistant to bring juice. She then took the cart with the blood pressure machine.

  “Please sit. I'll take your blood pressure.”

  Tomás sat down, his eyes never leaving Cari.

  And while he was a friend of my father, this was making me uneasy.

  Very fucking uneasy.

  “Tomás?” I asked. The man was nearly as white as a sheet And continued to look at Cari.

  “Papá?” Emiliano asked, placing a hand on his shoulder.

  Cari was taking his blood pressure all the while his eyes remained on her.

  “Who is your mother?”

  Cari took a step back, surprised, and I felt my anger spark. Friend or no friend, I would not allow him to upset her.

  Tomás stood so suddenly, Cari stepped back again, and bumped into my chest. I put her behind me.

  “Mira Tomás, aunque eres amigo de la familia, no voy a permitir que preguntes sobre asuntos que no son tuyos.”

  Even if he was a friend of the family, I wasn't going to allow him to ask about things that were none of his business.

  “Pero si lo es.”

  He seemed to think it was.

  Just then, Beth came in.

  “Liliana Zavala. That was my mother.”

  “I can't believe this, Cari,” Beth breathed, folder in hand.

  “Who is your father?” Tomás kept on with the fucking questioning.

  “You're the match.”

  Cari had come from behind me and was looking from Tomás to Beth. Cari’s voice was tight. I knew she was upset. My arm snaked around her and I began massaging her neck. Tomás looked at my hand around her and then to her face again. Beth had her mouth open in shock at her revelation.

  “Tomás, you're overstepping. Back off the questioning,” I snapped. I clenched my jaw.

  Three seconds.

  That was how long I was away from fully exploding and ruining whatever relationship we had with him and the Colombian Cartel.

  Family friend or not, he was still the head of a notorious cartel, and I wouldn't allow him to ask about personal information concerning my woman.

  “Beth, that's impossible. I don't have siblings. My mother told me my only one had died with my father.”

  She was shaking her head and Tomás had taken a step back.

  “Did Lily tell you the name of your father and sibling?”

  His voice was hoarse and his eyes were wild.

  “You say her nickname with such familiarity.” Cari’s expression mirrored her confusion.

  “Please. What were their names,” he asked again.

  “Tommy. Emilio.”

  He laughed, but it was one that was not from humor. His laugh was full of relief and incredulity, tinged with a bit of anger and madness.

  He moved forward and reached for Cari.

  I pushed her behind me again, and this time, I drew my gun.

  Emiliano took a step forward and drew his.

  48

  Cari

  “Carlos!”

  He wouldn't let me step from behind him.

  “We need to call security, Care.”

  “No, Beth. Let me try and calm him down.” I placed my hand on Carlos’ back but I couldn't redirect his attention to me.

  “Back the fuck off, Tomás, and tell your son to put his piece away, or I won't hesitate to pop a few in you or him. I don't know what the fuck is going on here, but you don't fucking touch her. In fact, stand the fuck over there until we figure this shit out.”

  Tomás took a step back and looked at Emiliano, shaking his head.

  “Estas loco?”

  Emiliano asked if he was crazy. A smile spread across Tomás’ face.

  “Si, y con razón.”

  He'd said he was and with reason.

  “Carlos, lower the gun. Please.”

  I'd stepped from behind him and placed my hand on his where he held his gun. Slowly, he lowered his arm, but his gun remained in his hand.

  Emiliano’s father would not stop staring at me. It made me super uncomfortable.

  “Beth?”

  I waited for my friend, who looked like she needed a breather, to look at me.

  “It's your name. You're the match, Cari. Better than any I've ever seen.”

  “Impossible. We're not related. Maybe it’s a fluke”

  Beth shook her head. “I don't think so.”

  “What's your birthdate?”

  I answered Tomas’ question at the same time as Carlos said, “You're done asking personal questions.”

  Tomás sat down, all the while looking at me.

  “She was pregnant. Dios mío, she was pregnant.”

  His eyes were watery and he placed his head in his hands.

  “He’d told me she’d died. I never knew about you. It would have been too early for us to know.”

  I took a step back. I looked from Emiliano to Carlos.

  “What are you talking about?”

  My heartbeat was beginning to accelerate. The stress was causing me to feel as if acid was trickling down from my brain to my shoulders.

  Anxiety.

  Fuck.

  “Tell me what you were told about your father.” Tomás’ questions were odd and intrusive, but I was curious.

  “Tomás…” Carlos growled. He was practically foaming at the mouth and I saw his index finger twitch over the trigger of his gun.

  “Please holster it.”

  I reached out to his hand and caressed it. Carlos looked down at me for a long moment before reaching back to holster his gun.

  “Thank you.” I reached and gripped his hand tightly. He squeezed mine and it comforted me.

  “My mother told me that there was an emergency. That my father left with my brother, and she was left alone because it was safer that way. They were to meet later. She had said that my father believed there were threats to their lives. My mother insisted that my father take their son, as he seemed better able to defend him. And she thought it would be only a month or less of separation. She said she discovered she was pregnant with me afterwards. When a month turned into six, eventually a friend of my father's came to her.” My voice faltered on that words.

  Manny.

  Fucking asshole.

  “He'd told her that my father and brother died in Colombia. They had been making plans to send for her. After that,
she was stuck. My mother was already too pregnant and she needed her job. I was born and she raised me.”

  Tomás stood again. The hope on that man’s face was humbling. He looked desperate, too.

  “Where is she? Where is your mother?”

  “Papá?”

  Emiliano was standing. I looked up at Carlos then, and he was looking down at me with surprised eyes.

  “Where is Liliana?”

  My attention returned to Tomás at his frantic words.

  “Why are you asking all of these questions?“

  “Your mother. Where is she?”

  He was insistent, desperately and rudely so.

  The anger that rose in me at his questions and tone surprised me.

  “She's dead! She died in the same fire that nearly killed me. My father’s friend had returned. They'd eventually married. He was abusive,” my voice wavered. Carlos hugged me from behind as my eyes watered.

  Then suddenly, the anger left me as I recalled that night. I felt defeated.

  “They’d fought one night. My mother told me to hide but I saw him hit her. He hit me, too, when I confronted him. I passed out and awoke at the hospital with burns. He'd set the house on fire. My mother didn't make it.”

  An animalistic howl escaped his lips. His knees buckled and he held onto the conference table. He leaned over it, forearms on the top, his head resting on them. He began beating the table.

  “Mr. Valladares, please calm down.”

  Beth was as taken aback as I was but apparently even she knew what was going on because her eyes looked at me with knowledge in them that I didn't have.

  I was too much inside the forest and didn't know it. I was so hyper-focused on the trees (the man’s questions) that I couldn't see the forest.

  But it seemed that everyone else could.

  “What the hell is going on here?”

  I looked at Emiliano, who had a glazed, hopeful look on his face. Just then, Tomás stood. He looked at me with eyes that had a familiarity they shouldn't have had.

  “Caridad Zavala.”

  “Yes.”

  “Caridad was the name of my mother. Zavala was your mother’s maiden name.”

  “No, it was her married name.”

  Tomás adamantly shook his head.

  “No. Her married name was Valladares. I told her to go by her maiden name temporarily when we separated that night. Your mother didn't observe the Hispanic custom of keeping her maiden name when married. She was proud to carry mine and she refused to take her maiden name. I promised her it would only be for a short time.”

  His voice was a gravelly whisper. His breath was coming out in pants and that's when I noticed my own breathing.

  I was hyperventilating.

  “I'm Tommy, Caridad. He's Emilio.” Tomas stopped and laughed. “She was so stubborn. She insisted we name him Emilio but I fought hard for Emiliano. She said she would just call him Emilio anyways.”

  Emiliano laughed. “That's one of the few memories I have of her.”

  My eyes snapped to him and back at Tomás when he spoke again.

  I now knew what had not yet been said. I realized that I indeed had seen the forest, not just the trees, but I had just dismissed the thoughts with a reproach laced with absurdity aimed at myself. I had known with Tomás’ first set of odd, intrusive questions, but I had refused to entertain the suspicion.

  “I'm your father, Caridad.”

  His eyes were watery and he walked towards me. He put his arms around me, which effectively took me out of Carlos’ arms and into his.

  “You're my daughter,” he whispered into my hair.

  I couldn't breath. The room was spinning. I couldn't catch my breath.

  “Shit. She's having a panic attack. Beth…”

  I didn't hear anything else Carlos said. I felt as if I was passed around somehow, and eventually, some time later my brain began functioning. I had a glass of juice in my hand, and five worried faces around me- Carlos’, Beth’s, the man who said he's my father, and the patient who may be my brother. The fifth was Beth’s assistant.

  “Caramelo, breathe baby. You're going to be ok.”

  I reached out to touch his cheek and he took my hand and kissed it. Tomás watched Carlos and then his eyes returned to me.

  “Perdóname, hija. I didn't mean to distress you.”

  He just told me, his daughter, to forgive him.

  His daughter.

  My father.

  “I…I think we need testing. DNA testing.”

  Beth chimed in. “You're way too good of a match for Emiliano, Care. I don't doubt that this man is your brother, and looking at the pair, I don't doubt that he's this man’s son. They're practically twins. We can set up the tests, though. ”

  I touched my hand to my forehead trying to stop the spinning.

  “I would've protected you.”

  My eyes rushed to his. Tears gathered in mine and Carlos wrapped an arm around me.

  “I didn't know about you. I don't think even Liliana would've known at the time we separated. I was told she’d died. I was never told about you.”

  “She had been told you and my brother had died.” Tears fell down my cheeks.

  “Manny.” His voice was hard and he clenched his jaw.

  “How do you know it was him?”

  “He was my best friend. We both had eyes for your mother, but her eyes were only for me. I felt some resentment from him at times, but brushed it off. He was the only one who knew what was going on and he was the one who planned the separation. Your mother was supposed to go to Colombia, and we were eventually supposed to reunite there a month after.”

  Beth had excused herself as had her assistant. It was just me, Carlos, and the two men who were now my family.

  I told them about my life, Manny’s abusiveness and passes, the fire and the trial, and the years in foster care.

  Everything.

  I told them about Chris.

  “The night my mom died, they had had a bad fight. It was about drugs but he screamed at her, saying it was an excuse. That she had to know who he was and what he did. He’d been angry. He’d asked her why she couldn't love him, that she’d married him more for nostalgia than affection. That she’d continued to miss and love my father despite him having died more than a decade earlier.”

  My father’a face was a mask of rage.

  “He’d orchestrated all of this.”

  “But why? If he wanted Mom, why wait over a decade to go to her?” Emiliano looked at me as he asked that question to his father.

  “Maybe he wanted something more,” I offered.

  “The US territory.” We looked at my father. “He ruined my life, destroyed my family, and kept me from my daughter, for greed and power. At the time you say he returned, that would've been when New York was doing well.”

  “Maybe he felt he could return,” Emiliano growled.

  My father’s fists clenched. “I'll pull off every fingernail to find it out. I bet there was never the threat on our lives that he’d said we’d had.”

  I swallowed. “There's more.”

  I admitted to Manny’s blackmail and what he had on me. I'd looked at Tomás, fearful of what he'd think of me. Carlos hugged me close and kissed my head.

  “Did he hit you? That night you called for me to pick you up here at the office. The bruises on your face.”

  I nodded at Carlos, and explained that night to them, and then about the night I ran him over.

  “I'm going to kill him.”

  All three of them said it at the same time. My eyes widened and I looked at each one of them, but they were looking at each other in silent communication.

  “He's dangerous. I don't want anything to happen to you- any of you.” I turned my gaze to my father and brother. “We've only just found each other. I don't want to lose you. Besides, he may already be. His body was gone.”

  Tomás stood.

  “I want to hug my daughter. Flesh of my blood. Ch
ild of the woman who held, and will forever hold, my heart. Woman who carries my beloved mother’s name.”

  Moved, I stood unsteadily and uncertainly. He opened his arms and I only hesitated a moment before I rushed into them.

  It felt like a missing piece was suddenly put into place. A feeling I hadn't felt since the death of my mother, filled me. My body was shaking as I mourned and cried.

  Like a little girl.

  Like the little girl who'd always wanted a family.

  Tomás- my father- I silently corrected, caressed my head and held me tight. I felt his own body shudder.

  In his arms, I felt a familiarity as if he'd always been in my life, as if we’d always known each other.

  I had a father.

  And I had a brother.

  People I’d always wished I’d had when I was alone in this world.

  Ice wove itself into my veins and clawed it's way up my back all of a sudden.

  I realized that here was another brother with cancer who looked to me for help.

  And I as continued to return my father’s tight hug, and included Emiliano when he joined us, I vowed that Emiliano would not meet the same fate Chris had.

  49

  Carlos

  “Everything been good?”

  I looked up as I finished pouring myself two thumbs of rum. Roman walked into Pop’s office undoing the top buttons of his business shirt, having already discarded his suit jacket.

  “Yea. Better than good.”

  I’d explained to Cari the dynamics of my family and her father’s so that she would not be blind to things or people. She had to know the truth about me, us, and them. She'd known something, of course through her friendship with Izzy, but I wanted her to truly understand the players and politics.

  Despite that, she was adamant that she wanted to get to know her father and brother.

  Roman brought me out of my thoughts when he slapped my back and poured his own drink.

  “Good. I even noticed Izzy calmer. She was antsy when you two had broken it off.”

  “Why?”

  He shrugged, finishing the second button. His eyes focused on mine.

  “I think she has always worried about Cari. More like, they both have worried over each other. They're more like twins than friends. When I first met Izzy, Cari was the one to hold Izzy together during rough times. Recently, with Cari falling apart, it shook Izzy. Cari has literally been the unshakeable one.”