With him no longer around, Christmas would be significantly better than when she was growing up. Paisley would be lying if she said she hadn’t considered Georgina’s plans over Christmas, but she wouldn’t ask her. The less time they spent with one another, the less painful it would surely be. Paisley’s phone buzzed on her bed, the screen lighting up.
V: Weekend away is off. See you on Monday.
Paisley stared at the screen. On the one hand, she was secretly thrilled that Victoria had cancelled, but on the other…why had she done that?
P: Everything okay?
V: I just think we should cool things off at the office. Georgina is suspicious.
P: So? I don’t believe we’re doing anything wrong.
V: I just think it’s for the best. I’m supposed to be your superior.
P: Right. Sure, okay.
Paisley reread the words on her screen. Georgina is suspicious. Those words alone led Paisley to believe that perhaps Georgina had said something to Victoria about their relationship. Was Georgina the reason for Victoria cooling off their half-arsed relationship…or was Victoria just no longer interested? At the moment, Paisley didn’t care for the answer. Woman after woman fucked her around…all she wanted was a night in bed, without the headache of her life lately.
Deciding that she could question it further tomorrow, Paisley pulled back the covers and climbed into bed. Merry fucking Christmas to me. She shook her head, taking a hair tie from her bedside table and pulling her hair back from her face. It had been a while since Paisley had enjoyed her own company, never one to need another person to keep her happy, but she did feel lonely tonight.
One thought continuously played over in her mind tonight…the possibility that Georgina was single. The idea that she was married had made it minimally easier for Paisley to cope around the office, but that had now been blown out of the water. If Georgina was, in fact, single…Paisley didn’t know what she would do. The want had never lessened, no matter how hurt she felt by Georgina’s actions, but could she prevent anything else from hurting her down the line? With Georgina around… Paisley wasn’t sure.
“Hey, Paisley?”
Paisley groaned, her face buried in the pillow beneath her. The headache she had when she was falling asleep hadn’t budged, her eyeballs throbbing as her eyelids flickered open.
“How are you feeling?” Georgina’s soft features came into full focus, her fingertips grazing the hair from Paisley’s face. “I made you some soup.”
“You never cook…”
“I did for you.” Georgina smiled, climbing beneath the covers. “Maybe you could try some when you’re feeling up to it.”
“It does smell good.” Paisley couldn’t quite make out what it was—the cold she was sporting preventing her from breathing properly—but there was a hint of leek or onion in the air. “Don’t you have somewhere to be? Work or out with friends?”
“No.” Georgina pulled Paisley against her chest, gently running her fingers through her hair. “I’m supposed to be here. Stop worrying.”
“Who wants to look after someone sick?” Paisley’s voice hoarse, she coughed against the cover draped over her body. “I’m really sorry. I’ve ruined our weekend plans.”
“Are you warm enough?” Georgina asked. “I can up the heat if you need me to.”
“I’m warm enough.” Paisley’s eyes flickered closed again, Georgina’s warmth enveloping her. “Hey,” she mumbled.
“Mm?”
“Thank you…”
Paisley shot up from her bed, a cold sheen of sweat covering her partially naked body. She hadn’t dreamt about Georgina in a long time; why were the dreams now coming back to her? This wasn’t good. Nothing she’d felt recently could be considered beneficial to Paisley, but Georgina in her dreams…. Damn it! In another world, her dreams would be something she clung to, but after three years alone, three years without the woman you love, dreams only heightened the pain. The pain and the undeniable urge to seek Georgina out.
Paisley pulled her knees against her chest, her bottom lip trembling. If she could just lie beside Georgina, hold her once again…
No. Paisley calmed her breathing, aware that her chest was heaving. She had options. She could leave Liverpool and visit her brother for a while. She could stay with Will; he didn’t live in the city. Or…she could refuse to run from her problems, instead choosing to face them head-on. Georgina was never supposed to be a problem.
It was true. In the months they spent together, Georgina had been perfect in every sense of the word. Nothing was too much. Everything they shared was genuine and honest, monumental respect for one another evident. So, where did it all go wrong? Paisley fully believed Georgina had left because Paisley confessed how she felt, but that didn’t make sense. Georgina had said those words back to her. Without missing a beat, ‘I love you’ fell from those beautiful red lips once, never to be heard again.
Paisley thought she had it all. An incredible, sophisticated woman in her life—in her arms—and a brilliant job. It was no secret that Georgina paid her staff well; it was the reason Paisley had decided to stay once it all fell apart between them. As she lay in bed, the time almost five am, Paisley wondered if staying had been worth it. As the days wore on, the same drivel day in day out, for three years, Paisley was merely existing until Georgina returned. Because she should have. She should have come back to Paisley. Even if only to explain her reasons for leaving, it would have beat the three-year wait. Anything, rather than nothing, would have been better than this.
Georgina stared, her eyes misting as tears filled them. December 10th. She hated this date. This was the date when, three years ago, she packed up a few belongings and left. That familiar ache in her chest hadn’t lessened—it never would. She could still see Paisley’s face as they bumped into one another at the office that day. Hurt. Betrayal. But also love. If there was anything Georgina had taken away from that day, it was the love that shone from Paisley’s eyes while they were together. For so many nights she thought about that love. Those eyes. The words once whispered to one another beneath the sheets of her super king-size bed.
The weather that night had been horrific. As she dropped Paisley back at home, the rain bouncing on the road and making it difficult to see safely through the windscreen of her Audi, Georgina had insisted Paisley wait a moment or two before she rushed inside her parent’s house. Truth be told, Georgina wanted Paisley to herself for another few minutes, the idea of spending the night alone in bed was harder than she’d anticipated. She couldn’t safely say that anyone had ever meant so much to her. Paisley had it all in her eyes.
Her soft curves. Georgina could still see them in her mind when she closed her eyes, her hands trailing Paisley’s body without a single ounce of regret or apprehension. Paisley’s hands. God, they fit so well within Georgina’s. Her voice…Paisley’s voice was one thing Georgina could never forget. How she whispered, ‘I love you’ with complete certainty in her tone. Those words and that voice had haunted Georgina over the years. In her dreams. As she sipped coffee out on the back terrace. Every moment of every day, Georgina thought about Paisley. Her wedding, too.
It was at that point that Georgina knew she was making the biggest mistake of her life. How could she marry a woman—utter vows in front of a select few—when she was thinking about the moments she’d shared with Paisley? Georgina would never know how she made it through that ceremony, but the entire marriage had been short-lived. Just six weeks into her marriage to Rhona, they both agreed that it wasn’t working. Rhona knew who Paisley was, knew the reasons for Georgina leaving Liverpool, but she wanted to make it work. In some way, Georgina did too. She couldn’t be with Paisley, it simply wasn’t possible, so she had to move on. Move forward.
I’ll never move forward without her in my life.
Georgina wrapped her arms around herself, her eyes following the robin flitting about outside her front window. Just two weeks and it would be Christmas Eve, but Georgin
a would still be alone. She fully blamed herself for that outcome, but the only woman she would ever want was forbidden. Georgina knew it was true what they said: the things you can’t have…makes the desire stronger. The desire that burned within her though was something Georgina couldn’t control. No matter how much she knew she had to.
It doesn’t matter. Paisley would be waking up beside Victoria this morning. Georgina couldn’t be positive about that, but the sinking feeling within her belly told her she was right on the money. Victoria was younger and gorgeous, but the things she said to Georgina at the office left her feeling apprehensive. How could someone say those things about Paisley? Good to have around. Paisley was worth so much more than that—she deserved more than that. How could anyone use Paisley? Georgina wouldn’t tell her what Victoria had said—or about the offer of dinner. Making Paisley aware of Victoria’s intentions would only make matters worse between them, Georgina was sure of that. But she would watch Victoria closely.
Don’t get involved, Georgina. This is not your business. Except it was. Paisley and her feelings would always be Georgina’s business. Paisley may never see that, or understand it, but the fact still remained. Georgina would protect Paisley until her very last breath—regardless of the fact that she knew Paisley hated her. Deciding to put herself out of her own misery, Georgina pushed off the frame of the window and moved towards the staircase. She may as well be at the office…she would only go insane sitting here.
5
Georgina wrapped her heavy woollen coat around her tighter, her face damp from the early morning fog that had settled over Liverpool. The drive to the office hadn’t been pleasant, the weather and Paisley on her mind, but she could spend the next several hours concentrating on work now that she was here.
She held her hot chocolate against her, thankful that the coffee shop nearby had been quiet this morning. Pushing her hair from her face, Georgina entered the office building. A few members of staff had chosen to work on their own backlogs even though the firm was beginning to wind down for the holiday period, so she wouldn’t necessarily be completely alone today. Unfortunately, that was what she hoped for. Anxiety had never been a part of Georgina’s life, but over the last few years it was constant.
Always looking over her shoulder, Georgina wondered if it would ever end. Nervousness wasn’t in her disposition—she couldn’t afford to feel that way when she was one of the most successful lawyers in the north-west—but nothing felt how it used to. As much as she hated to admit it to herself, Georgina was not the woman she used to be. As much as it pained her, Georgina would never be who she once was. Whether that be the successful lawyer, the bitch around the office, or just herself when she was closed away…none of those sides of her would return. Too much time had been wasted protecting herself. Hiding away.
She took a right at reception, an eerie sensation around the building putting her senses on heightened alert. Something felt off…and her office door wasn’t locked. She slid her right hand into her purse, taking out the flip-knife she carried in the lining of it, and calmed her breathing. Nobody should be in her office.
With a shaky hand, Georgina placed her hot chocolate on the desk at reception, glancing around for any signs of security. Nobody was here. It was just Georgina, the corridor, and whoever was in her office. She should turn around and leave—that was the safest bet—but she needed to know what was waiting for her. She knew being back could cause issues, but Georgina didn’t believe those who were keeping an eye on her would be so on the ball. After all, she was only here to do her job. Nothing else.
She pushed the door open, gripping the handle tight. There was a presence, she could feel it, but Georgina wasn’t sure she could step into the room. The only thing in view was her computer, everything else hidden behind the door. Oh, God. Her stomach reeled. Releasing the handle, the blade in her hand held out in front of her, Georgina kicked the door open the rest of the way with her foot.
Her eyes landed on the body sprawled out along her black leather couch, the dull sound of concealed music now apparent.
“Fucking hell.” Georgina dropped the knife, her hands shaking with both fear and adrenaline.
Paisley shot up, pulling her earphones out. “What the hell are you doing?” She clambered back on the couch, her eyes now fixed on the shining metal lying on the floor between them. “Gee?”
“What the hell are you doing in here?” Georgina shrieked. “I could have killed you!”
“That doesn’t explain what you’re doing with a knife!” Paisley leapt from the couch, her phone and book dropping to the floor with a thud. “Georgina, what’s going on?”
“Nothing.” Georgina retrieved the knife from the floor, closing it and slipping it back into her purse. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to frighten you.”
“Frighten me?” Paisley scoffed. “Have you lost your mind?”
“I lost my mind a long time ago,” Georgina muttered. “Did you need to see me or something?”
“N-no.” Paisley lowered her eyes. “I came by to do some work, but Victoria has taken everything with her for the weekend.”
“That still doesn’t explain what you’re doing in here or how you got in.” Georgina’s eyebrow rose, her arms now folded across her chest.
“I still had your spare key,” Paisley admitted. “I just…I don’t know. I ended up in here.”
“You should be getting ready to go home to your parents.” Georgina shook her head. “Don’t waste your life in this place, Paisley. You should be preparing to leave for Christmas.” She furrowed her brow as a sudden thought crossed her mind. “I thought you would have been with Victoria. You know, at her place…”
“I was supposed to spend the weekend with her,” Paisley explained, “but then she blew me off last night. I think she’s worried about you.”
“Worried about me?”
“That you won’t like it.” Paisley shrugged. “Sorry, I’ll get out of your way.”
Georgina refrained from going deeper into that conversation. She would say something she shouldn’t and then Paisley would only dislike her more. If that was possible.
“You don’t have to do that.” Georgina placed her purse down and unbuttoned her coat. As much as she didn’t want to be alone with Paisley, she couldn’t deny how good it felt. Paisley had always felt good. “I believe you have your own place now, but when do you leave for your parents?”
“I don’t think I will be…”
Georgina approached Paisley, noting the tension in her body as she did so. “Why?”
“Just don’t feel like it this year.” Paisley slowly stepped away from the slight space between them. “Georgina?”
“Mm?” Georgina took a seat at her desk, powering up the computer.
“Why did you come in here with a knife?”
Was it wise to discuss this with Paisley? Georgina didn’t believe so. “I’ve just been on edge a little. Nothing I can’t handle.” She dismissed her ex-girlfriend’s concerns, focusing on her log-in screen.
“Can you at least look at me while I talk to you?”
“I’m sorry.” Their eyes met; Georgina saw her own fear mirrored in Paisley’s gaze. “Don’t worry about anything you’ve just seen. It’s nothing.”
“It’s not nothing if you’re carrying a knife in your purse.”
“Just…” Georgina shook her head. “Really, it’s nothing.”
Silence fell between them as Paisley returned to her seat on the couch. She wasn’t sitting as comfortably as she had been when Georgina arrived, but that was understandable. Nobody expects their boss to arrive at the office carrying a knife in her hand. Paisley was visibly shaken, her hands trembling in her lap.
“Hey…” Georgina climbed from her seat and rounded her desk, crouching in front of Paisley. “I’m so sorry about before. I never wanted to scare you and I certainly don’t want to hurt you.”
Paisley focused on Georgina’s face fully for the first time in many years. “I need to
know what’s going on. Are you in danger?”
Yes. “No.”
“I don’t believe you.” Paisley lifted her hand, brushing Georgina’s blonde hair from her face. “Don’t you trust me?” Georgina’s eyes closed, the sensation of Paisley’s skin on her own overwhelming. “Gee?”
“P-please.” Georgina spoke quietly, her bottom lip trembling as one of Paisley’s hands cupped the side of her face. A soft, gentle thumb grazed her cheek. “I need you to stop touching me like that.” She leaned into Paisley’s touch even as she said it, her lips parting slightly. “Y-you should go.”
Paisley’s eyes bored into Georgina’s soul. “Tell me what’s going on…”
“I-I can’t.” Georgina dropped her head, reluctantly removing Paisley’s touch. “The less you know, the better.”
“If you’re in trouble, let me help you,” Paisley said. “If you need a place to stay…you can come back with me.”
“No, I couldn’t.” Georgina shook her head. “It’s not safe. I may have hurt you, but if you get involved in this, the thought of really losing you…” Georgina paused. “Go home and pack, Paisley. Spend Christmas with your family.”
“And what about you?”
Georgina offered a slight smile. “I don’t matter. What matters is that you’re safe, okay? I need it to stay that way.”
Paisley frowned. Georgina had already said too much.
Georgina stood, creating a distance between them. “Please, leave.”
“N-no.”
“Paisley.” Georgina pinched the bridge of her nose, releasing a deep sigh. “Leave!”
This wasn’t how she wanted it to be, but Georgina had to remain harsh on this matter. If turning into a bitch kept Paisley safe, she would do it time and time again. If Paisley’s hatred grew, it wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world.
Forever Yours Page 4