Hooked

by Gina Messina

  Charlie could still feel the sting of the whip, the scorching pain of wax, the tightness of the ropes around her wrists and ankles. She could also feel the sudden ache and wetness between her thighs. She crossed her legs and tried to dismiss it. Recalling these memories was like a trigger-a Pavlov reaction.

  Dr. Harrison interrupted her. “Sounds like he was grooming you, Charlie. Slowly taking control of your life. It’s very typical for a narcissist to look for one’s weaknesses as they initially try to gain a footing in their victim’s life. It’s not something that happens overnight. It’s much subtler than that, evolving gradually as the relationship evolves,” she smartly proclaimed.

  Charlie nodded back at her with her lips frozen open like a Venus Fly Trap because what the fuck was she supposed to say to that? Her doctor was right, though. For the first time since she started therapy years ago, a psychiatrist was finally making some sense. Could it be that Dr. Harrison’s $200,000 Ivy League education might finally be paying off! Mentally she ticked off the countless times Sean had lavished her with gifts and with all of those expensive shoes before heaving a deep, cleansing sigh.

  It felt like a light had been turned on in a dark room. She hadn’t felt this peaceful in months! The memories began flooding into her brain. It was almost as if a dam had been opened. Everything was becoming so very clear while she reflected on the weeks that morphed into months, during which she unknowingly and unwittingly became an eager participant in Sean’s many fetishes. He had been grooming her! Controlling her with gifts and mind-blowing sex! It happened slowly over time, so slowly that she hadn't noticed at first.

  If they weren’t together he checked in with her constantly, waking her up with calls at three o’clock in the morning. She would listen closely, the phone pressed hard against her ear, while he instructed her to strip naked and spread her legs open wide. Then he would seductively groan into the receiver, “Tell me when you’re wet, Charlotte.” Sometimes he would demand that she masturbate. “I want you to put your fingers inside your pussy,” he would order, willing her to pleasure herself at his very command. He coached her on how to use the latest sex toys that he picked up at the Pink Pussycat in the East Village, guiding her on her every move until they both climaxed at the same time. Charlie was both exhausted and invigorated. More times than not she would drag herself to class, deprived of much needed sleep and with dark rings encircling her eyes like a raccoon. She was always waiting for the next educational instructional, the next thrill that followed; the next early morning call that would arouse her from her ever fitful sleep. Charlie had become an addict and Sean was her drug of choice. And every time she crashed down from the high of an orgasm or a new shiny bauble, she soon needed another fix. It had been all-consuming.

  “When was the first time you sensed that something was wrong?” Dr. Harrison questioned.

  “About six months into the relationship,” she replied. Charlie vividly remembered everything about that conversation and that night.

  “It was my birthday and my parents and sisters were coming to the city to take me out to dinner. I called my mother to ask if Sean could join us at my favorite restaurant, Nobu. We always got to choose where we wanted to have our birthday dinner and I just adored Nobu back then. Anyway, I could sense from my mother’s attitude that she wasn’t happy about it.”

  “Charlie, it’s your 21st birthday!” her mother had stated with a clear indication that she was frustrated. “Don’t you agree it would be nice to celebrate just as a family?”

  “Sean’s a big part of my life, Mom,” Charlie answered. “I want him to be there and it’s important to me that you guys meet him. I know that when you do you’ll adore him. Everyone does!” When she heard her mother pause on the other end of the line, Charlie could tell from her silence that she was willing to compromise.

  “Fine. If he’s so important to you then he can come,” she finally said, using a very resolved tone that implied she’d given up. “But let’s have drinks first, just the immediate family. We haven’t been alone together since Christmas in Palm Springs.”

  Charlie had wanted to tell her mother that they really hadn’t spent family time together in Palm Springs. With her and her sisters going out every night and sleeping till noon then hightailing it to the boulevard to shop, there had never been the alone time her mother now craved. She only wondered if this new passion for family had everything to do with Sean. Her mother never liked to share. Not her husband and certainly not her children.

  Charlie reluctantly agreed to the plans. It was much easier than to argue about it. So she made arrangements to meet her family first for cocktails in the restaurant’s bar. That night, Sean was furious when she told him and adamantly refused to celebrate her birthday unless he was welcome to join the family for drinks as well. And, it didn’t matter how much cajoling she did because when they got into bed that night, he made his position crystal clear.

  “Charlotte, I’m arriving with you or I’m not coming at all,” he asserted with the utmost authority then hugged his pillow and turned to face the wall. Not only was it the first time he showed no interest in having sex but it was also the first time he’d ever turned his back to her. She right away knew she had little choice in the matter. Mom’s just going to have to deal, she told herself as she reached over and put her hand inside his boxer shorts.

  “Of course you’re going to arrive with me. My parents will understand,” she whispered as she caressed him. She could feel him growing harder in her hand.

  “Pull down your panties,” he muttered back, then turned to face her and buried his head between her moist thighs.

  The next night, when they arrived at Nobu, Sean kept his arm securely around her shoulder and pulled her as close into him as was physically possible. It made it difficult for her to walk in her ridiculously high heels, but she teetered on, desperately trying to avoid tripping on his ankles. To Charlie, it was always more important to be sexy and klutzy than plain and steady. When they neared the bar where her family was waiting, she braced herself for their reaction, or rather, her mother’s reaction.

  “Everyone, this is Sean,” she announced in a clear confident voice. She could feel a small squeeze of Sean’s hand on her shoulder. All eyes stared up in astonishment when they saw him glued to her as if they were Siamese twins that had somehow been disregarded by the medical field-missing the memo that an operation would have made their quality of life so much more tolerable.

  Charlie could tell it was going to be a disaster of a night. She couldn’t ignore the frustrated look her mother and father had plastered on their faces when she introduced him. But regardless of how they felt, her parents stood and graciously shook his hand. Sean would have nothing of the formalities and instead, pulled her mother in for warm embrace and a kiss on the cheek then gave her father a hearty slap on his back as if they were long lost war buddies reunited after having spent months together under enemy fire.

  Her sisters, Carrie and Stacey, raised their eyebrows in disbelief and continued to sip their Sake from tiny porcelain cups while hiding their devious grins from view. But she knew what they were thinking: (A.) Sean was hot; (B.) Sean must be a good lay; and (C.) She was whipped. They were right on all counts. After all, she’d never brought a man to any of her family gatherings. She’d fucked a lot of them in her day, but she didn’t believe in shitting where she ate. Charlie was very careful to separate that life from her family life… that was until Sean had entered the picture.

  “Charlie, you’re too thin,” her mother immediately stated after she gave her a warm embrace. “I can feel your ribs and you look absolutely exhausted. Why, you even have dark circles under your eyes! Are you getting enough sleep? Do you ever eat?” she continued to voice with concern. Charlie knew she was saying this because she was truly worried about her, but she also knew her mother was putting on a show for Sean's benefit. So she ignored her mother’s comments. Instead, she took a seat next to him and averted her eyes while her m
other kept scrutinizing her appearance.

  “Charlotte looks absolutely perfect to me,” she gratefully heard Sean say. He firmly grabbed her hand and held it tightly in his lap.

  After cocktails, (of which the three girls had more than they should have) the hostess escorted them to a beautifully set table in the center of the dining room. The discussion that followed was typical family talk until her parents started asking her loaded questions.

  “How are your classes going, Charlie?” her father inquired with interest.

  “Fine, I guess,” she mumbled back, while trying to avoid too many details.

  “Any idea what classes you're registering for next semester?” her mother chimed in.

  “No, not yet,” she offered vaguely, hoping they wouldn't ask any more probing questions. The truth was, she’d been missing so many classes so she could spend time with Sean her grades had started to suffer.

  Sean didn't say a word throughout this grand inquisition. Instead, he remained quiet, sitting next to her with his hand resting in her lap. Her sister, Stacey, however, had lots to say and interrupted the conversation with a grand announcement of her own. Although Charlie hated the fact that she was trying to grab the spotlight, a part of her welcomed the distraction.

  “Speaking of grades, Charlie. Did mom tell you I scored in the top one percent of the country on my LSAT’s?” she exclaimed with arrogance.

  “No. I hadn't heard.”

  Her mother had the good sense to look embarrassed before explaining, “Well, now, Stacey, I didn't get a chance to tell Charlie anything yet.” She hesitated before adding, "I was hoping to tell her the good news over cocktails with the family, but plans have changed so suddenly.” At the word ‘family’ and ‘suddenly’ her mother gave Sean a pointed look of disapproval.

  The dinner conversation quickly centered around Stacey’s graduate school studies at Georgetown University and to which law schools she planned to apply to in the spring. Although Charlie was happy that the focus was off her, she was beginning to resent the attention Stacey was commanding.

  “I’m seriously considering Harvard!” her self-righteous sister broadcasted so loudly, half the diners in the small restaurant turned their heads to stare. Charlie had to admit that even by Stacey's standards it was an all-star performance!

  As Stacey prattled on and on about her law school prospects, their father sat up straighter and beamed with pride while their mother’s face lit up with utter joy. Charlie felt sick to her fucking stomach. She glanced over at Carrie who had just finished taking a healthy gulp of her dark red cabernet and knew she felt the same way. When she returned her attention back toward Sean, she visibly cringed. Sean, who had been salaciously eyeing her super intelligent sister’s rack all night long, was peering over at Stacey with a strange mix of desire and disdain.

  Stacey was super smart and not just when it came to books. She knew she was blessed with an amazing pair of tits and she used them to her advantage every chance she got. She always gained everyone’s undivided attention (both men and women) with her ample cleavage and now she had her boobs aimed in Sean's direction like a rocket launcher. Charlie had caught Sean glancing at her sisters rack several times during cocktails with an awed look on his face. It was so obvious that a few times she’d been on the verge of asking him to kindly put his tongue back in his mouth.

  Of course, Sean’s passing glances hadn’t gone unnoticed by Stacey who had just casually mentioned to him that her IQ was one thirty-two. Charlie nearly threw up when she continued to prattle on about Harvard, drawing out the ‘a’ sound and dropping the ‘r’and pronouncing it ‘Haahvid’ as if she were a native Bostonian. By the time their entrees were served, she had completely lost what little appetite she’d had and merely picked at her Chilean Sea Bass with black bean sauce and kelp salad.

  Her mother wouldn’t let up and kept urging her to eat. “What’s wrong, Charlie? You usually love the fish at Nobu.”

  “I’m not hungry,” she meekly answered, then started to make excuses in an halfhearted attempt to get her mother off her back. “I had a late lunch with one of my friends.”

  “From school?”

  Charlie nodded.

  “What’s her name?” her mother questioned suspiciously.

  Charlie wracked her brain to come up with an answer. She really hadn’t made any new friends since she’d met Sean. Come to think of it, she really didn’t have any school friends except for one girl she’d recently befriended in photography class.

  "Lucy,” she blurted out. “She’s from Kentucky. We have an elective together.”

  Thankfully, just as her mother was about to ask for more details, Sean interrupted, “Well, if you’re not going to finish that, I’ll eat it,” he greedily offered as he eyed her plate. Charlie passed it over to him and watched as he hungrily devoured every flaky morsel of fish then proceeded to wipe up the black bean sauce with little crusty pieces of bread. From the corner of her eye she could see her mother taking it all in with skepticism.

  “Such a healthy appetite!” she observed with a sarcastic tone. “You should follow your boyfriend’s lead and eat more. I’m sure he never misses a meal.”

  When they were done with their substantial entrees and their inconsequential small talk, which was designed to fill up the space between mouthfuls, the waiter brought out a beautiful tiered chocolate ganache cake. It was expertly decorated with delicate sugar blossoms and a large flaming sparkler. Happy 21st Birthday, Charlie, was written on the top in lacy white icing. When they’d all finished a slice, her mother attempted to serve her another.

  She took a knife and cut a large wedge from the cake. “You need to put on some weight. I ordered this cake because chocolate has always been your favorite,” she declared with a smile as she slid the plate across the table toward Charlie.

  Since chocolate was her favorite and simply too good to pass up, she returned her mother’s smile and reached for her fork. But just as she was about to take a bite, she felt Sean stiffen.

  “I think Charlotte’s had more than enough. But I’d love another piece.” He grabbed the plate from her then picked up his fork and enthusiastically dug in. Her mother glared at him with a sour expression.

  There was an incredibly awkward pause that was only broken when Charlie stammered, “I’m stuffed.”

  Stacey laughed. “I can’t believe you don’t want more.” Then she leaned forward, which caused her plunging neckline to plunge even lower and Sean’s wide eyes to open even wider. Charlie narrowed her own eyes and gave her sister a fierce warning glare.

  “That’s really funny, Stacey. I’m rolling on the floor!” she sarcastically said with another heated look that was more like a death stare.

  Sean considered Stacey with a perplexed expression until she zealously explained that when Charlie was a baby, their mother had tried to get her to say her first word but she would just sit and babble.

  “Apparently Charlie was delayed in the talking department, among other things, so each night our mother would sit her in the high chair and try to get her to say ‘mama’ or ‘dada.’ She tried everything!”

  “I don’t think Sean’s interested in hearing about when I was a baby. Right, Sean?” Charlie argued with a pleading stare of mercy that was directed right at him. If looks could kill, he would have been dead before she finished saying his name.

  “I’d love to hear, Charlotte. You must have been an adorable baby,” he chimed back. He hadn’t even noticed the look Charlie gave him because he was so completely enraptured by Stacey.

  “Well, one day while feeding her ice cream, Charlie grabbed the spoon with her grubby little hands and jabbered ‘more.’ At first our mother thought she had said ‘mom,’ but she quickly realized that every time she took the spoon away Charlie would greedily reach for it and say ‘more.’ From that day on, everywhere Charlie went, it was always the first thing that came out of her mouth. If she saw a toy she wanted she would point and say more, bubbles in t
he bath…she wanted more! If she was on a swing at the park and mom stopped pushing her she would scream out more! It became a running joke in the family. Charlie just always wanted more from the first time she could speak!”

  “More, huh?” Sean turned to her and asked in a seductive whisper as her face blushed a lovely shade of embarrassment. She could only imagine what he had in mind in the privacy of her bedroom later on that night and how she would undoubtedly be begging him for more.

  “Go ahead, Charlie; you know you want one more slice,” Stacey snorted out for a second time.

  “Seriously. I couldn’t eat another bite. I don’t know why everyone’s so concerned about what I put in my mouth.” Charlie pushed her chair back from the table and excused herself. “I’m going to the ladies’ room.”

  Once she got to the bathroom she locked herself in a stall and sat down on the toilet. She didn’t think she was too thin. In fact, she liked the way her thighs looked and the way her ribcage was so defined she could count each bone by running her fingers across them. They’re just jealous, she convinced herself. They’ve always been jealous of me.

  When she walked out of the stall, Carrie was standing by the vanity mirror with her hands placed firmly on her curvy hips. Charlie made her way to the sink and started to wash her hands. Carrie just stood there and watched. Charlie was sure her sister was psychoanalyzing her, which made her uncomfortable. She could tell she wanted to say something in the worse way. Finally, she couldn't take it anymore and asked, “So what do you think of Sean?” then checked her teeth for random traces of seaweed before applying a fresh coat of lip gloss.

  “He’s a total creep,” Carrie responded with an ultra-serious attitude. “You need to get rid of him. And quick.”