Secret Admirer

by Cynthia Eden

  His stare was cold. Hard. “I had a job to do.”

  She backed up a step. That jab hurt. “Then I guess you did it.” He’d fucked her for the FBI. Talk about taking one for the team. She glanced down at his hand. “Let me go.”

  He pulled her closer. “I didn’t want to cross the line with you.”

  Was she supposed to believe that?

  “I tried to stay away from you. I was sleeping on the couch, remember? No, not sleeping. Because I couldn’t sleep. If you want the damn truth, I haven’t had a good night’s sleep since I met you.”

  Jerk. “So sorry for the inconvenience.”

  His hold tightened on her wrist. “You are in my head. When I close my eyes, I see you. Your smile. The way your face gets all serious and you get a little furrow between your brows when you’re thinking hard about something.”

  “Let go of my hand.”

  “I wanted you from the first moment because you are fucking gorgeous. But you got beneath my skin…” He tugged her even closer. “You did that because you are strong, and you’re smart and you’re—”

  “A killer? Isn’t that what you thought when we first met?” And it hurt. “How can someone like you want a killer?”

  “I was supposed to prove your guilt,” he gritted out.

  The words were like nails in her coffin. She snatched her hand from his grip. Took two quick steps back.

  “I was supposed to prove your guilt…or find a way to show the world you were innocent. Know which option I wanted? Know why I was awake at night? Every single night? Because I needed you to be innocent. I wanted to prove that—not your guilt.”

  Did he think she’d believe his lies again? Not today.

  “I knew I should have kept my hands off you. I fucking tried.” His hands were fisted right then. “But last night, when you came to my door…you were wet from the rain, and you were the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen.”

  She didn’t want to hear more. “Stop.”

  “I intended to sleep on the couch. Having sex with you—that was a line I wasn’t going to cross. Then you screamed.”

  Alice turned away from him. She’d screamed, and he’d come running into the bedroom. She’d been the one to say she wanted him. She’d been the one to push.

  “You were scared, and I hated your fear. I wanted to take it all away. I wanted you to never fear again.” His voice rasped behind her. “And I wanted you. More than I’ve ever wanted anyone or anything in my life.”

  She wasn’t going to believe him. Zander had already proved he was a world class liar.

  Just like Hugh.

  No, no, dammit, he’s not like Hugh.

  “I wasn’t going to leave you. Nothing could have made me leave you.”

  She put one foot in front of the other as she headed for the stairs.

  “Alice?”

  Her shoulders stiffened.

  “I’m sorry, Alice.”

  Her eyes closed.

  “Hurting you was never part of my plan.”

  Her eyes opened. She climbed the first step. The second. The third. Behind her, she heard him stalk toward the stairs, and she stopped, making herself turn and look at him. “You didn’t want to hurt me.” Her chest burned. “What did you think would happen when I found out the truth?”

  She saw a flash of torment on his face.

  “Alice—”

  “But it was just part of the job, right? Everything was part of the job.” She gave a careless shrug even though careless was the last thing she felt. “Except for the fucking part. That was a bonus.”

  He bounded up the stairs. Crowded too close to her. She thought he’d wrap his hands around her arms again. That he’d try to justify—

  “I am an asshole. You think I don’t know that?” His eyes blazed. “I’m sorry I hurt you. You can bet your life that it won’t happen again. No more lies. You’re only going to get the truth from me, from here on out. And you might not always like what I have to say, but I won’t ever deceive you again.”

  “That’s great.” Her voice was deliberately mocking even as her heart raced.

  “You matter. What we did last night? It matters, too. I’m going to prove myself to you.”

  “Why?” They were done. Over. They had barely started their relationship—or whatever the hell it had been—and it had already ended. “I’m just a case. When the killer is caught, you won’t ever see me again.” She’d never see him.

  Case closed.

  But Zander shook his head. A faint smile teased his lips. “Baby, you are so much more than just a case.” His hand lifted, as if he’d touch her cheek, but his fingers stilled in the air. A moment later, his hand fisted once again as his arm fell back to his side. “I’m going to prove myself, because I want a real chance with you.”

  Why was he jerking her around? “I’m going to bed. Taking your bed. You sleep on the couch.” She hurried up several stairs.

  “I didn’t fake my reaction to you. I didn’t fake the way you make me feel.”

  She didn’t stop.

  “I will never hurt you again. I swear it.”

  She was at the top of the stairs. Hurriedly, Alice turned to the right. She rushed into his bedroom. Slammed the door shut.

  I will never hurt you again.

  If only she could believe those words. Unfortunately, it seemed that she had a very dangerous tendency to pick lovers…who lied.

  ***

  He stayed on the stairs too long. His gaze was directed up at the closed bedroom door.

  He was such a damn bastard.

  I’m sorry, Alice.

  Had there been tears in her eyes? He thought he’d seen them. He didn’t want Alice crying. He sure as hell didn’t want to be the man who made her cry.

  Alice should smile. Alice should laugh. She should be happy.

  Give me a chance, baby. I can prove to you that I can be more than just another SOB who has hurt you. Because Alice mattered. She’d gotten beneath his skin. And the night before…I’ve never wanted anyone that badly.

  Hell, Alice wasn’t just beneath his skin. He thought she might be in his heart.

  Only he hadn’t realized the truth, hadn’t even realized that he was falling for Alice, not until she’d looked at him with betrayal in her eyes.

  Then he’d understood that he’d destroyed something very special. Something he hadn’t even known was there, not until it was too late.

  I can fix this. Just give me the chance.

  His phone rang, the shrill cry making him swear as he hurried to grab the device from the table near the couch. He recognized the ring tone as Randall’s, and he shoved the phone to his ear. “Everyone in position?”

  “We are set.” Randall’s voice was low. “Cara is in the cabin. We’ve got eyes on the place, and if the bastard makes a move tonight, we’ve got him.”

  But he might not make a move that night. He might not make a move for days, or weeks. And if that happened…

  I’m not going to leave Alice unprotected.

  “Everything okay on your end?” Randall prompted.

  Hell, no, things were not okay. “I’ll take care of Alice.” Even if she hated him.

  He ended the call. Went to the couch. Put his gun and his phone on the coffee table. Then Zander made his ass comfortable. Not like he’d be going anywhere, not anytime soon.

  ***

  The FBI agents were such fools. Did they think he didn’t realize they were there? That he didn’t know a trap when he saw one?

  He spotted the agents easily as they hid in the woods. One dumbass was even smoking. Like the scent of the smoke wouldn’t travel on the wind. He saw them, counted them. Knew what they were doing.

  They wanted to pull him in. They thought that when he stepped foot in Alice’s cabin, they’d have him.

  He wasn’t going inside. Not yet.

  He retreated, slipping away from the cabin. Making sure no one saw him. Making sure that he was out of sight. It was time to talk wit
h Alice.

  But he wasn’t going in her home.

  He was going to get his sweet Alice…to come to him.

  Chapter Eight

  The phone rang, jarring Alice from the light sleep she’d finally managed to get. She was in Zander’s bed, fully dressed and on top of the covers, and when her phone rang, she jerked upright.

  It rang again and vibrated across the bedside table. She flipped on the light and reached for her phone even as the bedroom door flew open.

  Zander had gotten there fast. Very fast.

  As if he’d just been standing right outside of the bedroom door.

  She looked at the screen. “Unknown caller.” Her stomach immediately clenched. Oh, God. This is it.

  Zander hurried toward the bed. “Put it on speaker when you answer the call.”

  She nodded and swallowed the lump in her throat. Her finger slid across the phone’s screen as she answered, and she quickly tapped the option to put the caller on speaker. “H-hello?” She hated the stutter of her voice, but Alice was afraid.

  Silence. No…wait, had that been the rush of wind?

  Zander motioned with his hand for her to speak again.

  “Hello?” Her voice was stronger now. “Who is this?”

  “Did you get my flowers?”

  She sucked in a sharp breath. The voice was robotic, and she knew the caller was using some sort of distorter.

  “Alice, I’ve missed you.”

  “Who is this?” Alice demanded again.

  He laughed. Because of the robotic sound, the laughter was like nails sliding down a chalkboard. “You know.”

  “No, I have no clue.” She found herself staring at Zander. Somehow, looking into his eyes helped to calm her fear. “And I don’t have your flowers. The FBI has them.”

  More laughter. “Of course, I wanted them to know I was here.”

  Here…in the same town with her. Hunting her.

  “And you know who I am, Alice.” The volume of the voice decreased. A rough, metallic whisper told her, “I’m your Secret Admirer.”

  Goosebumps covered her arms. She was supposed to keep the guy talking. Zander had sent out a text as soon as she picked up the phone, and Alice knew the FBI agents were trying to track the call. She had to keep the guy talking. “Hugh Collins was the Secret Admirer. He’s dead. He’s—”

  “Was he?” More of that laughter. “I’m your Secret Admirer. I think you’re perfect, Alice. Absolutely perfect.”

  Her breath sawed in and out, and she knew he’d hear the desperate pants. “Where are you?”

  “Look out your bedroom window, and you’ll see.”

  What?

  She saw Zander fire out a quick text.

  “Come on, Alice. Do it. Look out your window and tell me what you see.”

  She didn’t know what to do. Obviously, she couldn’t look out her window. She wasn’t in her bedroom. Agent Cara McCoy was in her bedroom. “I’m not playing your game.” There. That sounded good. “I’m hanging up the phone, and I’m calling the authorities. You stay away from me, do you understand? Keep your sick, twisted—”

  “She’ll die.”

  Alice’s heart seemed to stop.

  “She’s not you. None of them were you, and I’m tired of the weak substitutes. So I’ll trade. You for her.”

  “Who?” Her voice was too high. Too shocked. Too scared.

  Zander reached for her left hand. His fingers curled around hers.

  “Dark hair. Blue eyes. She even walked like you. When I saw her today…well, after she delivered the flowers to you in the hospital, I thought…she’d be perfect.”

  No, no.

  “I haven’t hurt her, not yet. But I will.”

  “Don’t.”

  “Then trade. You for her. It’s easy.”

  Zander shook his head.

  “Where? When?” Alice blurted.

  “Right here. Right now. Come out of the cabin. Walk to me. When I have you, I’ll tell the cops where Tiffany is. Come to me.”

  The line went dead.

  Oh, hell, no.

  Alice leapt out of the bed. She ran for the door.

  But Zander grabbed her. He locked his arms around her waist and yanked her back against his body. “No! Jesus, no, baby, you aren’t going out there!”

  She fought against his hold, but he just held her tighter. “He has the woman from the hospital! Tiffany!” Alice could see the other woman so clearly in her mind. “I can’t let her die!”

  “She won’t.” Zander’s breath blew against her ear. “Your call was being monitored. You know that. And I was texting Randall the whole time. Cara will go out of the cabin, just like the bastard ordered. But Cara will be armed. She’ll run out just as if she’s you.”

  Her breath heaved in and out.

  “It’s going to be okay,” Zander said. “We’ve got this.”

  ***

  Special Agent Cara McCoy adjusted her ear piece, and then she made sure that her weapon was concealed beneath her coat. She pulled in a deep breath, squared her shoulders, and got her ass in character.

  When she opened the front door and ran outside, fear was clear on her face. She let the terror show. She rushed toward the woods and spun in a circle. “I’m here!” Cara yelled. “Where are you?” Frantically, she turned, trying to move quickly so that anyone watching wouldn’t get a too-close look at her face. But she wasn’t too worried. It was dark. The watcher wouldn’t be able to see her very clearly.

  She just needed to find him…

  ***

  Alice’s phone rang again.

  Zander saw her stiffen, and her gaze immediately shot to the phone that she’d tossed on the bed moments before. Zander had already released her. As soon as she’d stopped fighting, he’d let her go, and now he watched as she hurried to scoop up her phone.

  “Unknown caller,” Alice whispered. “It’s him again.”

  “Don’t,” Zander snapped out the quick command. “Cara should be outside by now. If you answer it and he’s watching, he’ll know we’re tricking him.”

  Her stare was on the phone. “If I don’t answer it, what happens to the woman he took?”

  Zander shook his head. “If he is watching Cara, if he’s out there like he said…” And he hoped the sonofabitch was. If the guy was in the woods…the agents will find you. “Then he’ll see that she doesn’t answer. He’ll see every move Cara makes. He’ll just think you ran out of the cabin so fast you forgot your phone. But if you answer…”

  The phone rang again.

  “If you answer the phone right now, you blow the whole show.”

  ***

  Cara couldn’t see anyone in the woods. She knew that other agents were stationed out there. Watching. Waiting. They were all searching for the perp. She stepped closer to the edge of the woods. Should she go into the trees? Walk through the darkness?

  If he was out there, he’d see what she did. Whatever move she made, perhaps he would follow.

  Cara hesitated. She didn’t want to walk into his trap.

  She wanted him to walk into hers.

  She turned around. Headed back for the cabin. She made sure her steps were slow, hesitant. Right before she reached the porch, Cara stopped. She turned back toward the darkness. “If you’re here, show yourself!”

  Something hit her chest. Hard and fast, and Cara stumbled. She blinked, then looked down. Her hand rose…and touched the blood. Blood that poured from the wound in her chest.

  Then she fell.

  ***

  The phone rang, and Alice jumped.

  Only…it wasn’t her phone ringing. It was Zander’s. He yanked up the phone, knowing by the ring tone that Randall was calling. “Tell me you got the bastard.”

  “No.” Randall’s voice cracked. “The sonofabitch. He shot Cara.”

  “What?”

  Alice edged closer. Zander hadn’t put the call on speaker, but Randall’s voice was loud, and Zander knew Alice would be able to hear most
of the words his partner was saying.

  “She was near the porch. She was calling out to him. A bullet slammed into her chest.” Randall’s ragged breathing drifted over the line. “She’s…shit…it hit her heart. We’re working on her, trying to get an ambulance out here but…shit,” he snarled again. “This isn’t his MO! He doesn’t shoot his victims. If we’d fucking thought he’d shoot, Cara would’ve worn her vest!”

  No, the Secret Admirer never shot his victims. But he also didn’t try to run them down with cars, either. Yet Alice had almost been hit by the sedan. This time, the killer was different. Because we aren’t dealing with Hugh Collins. This is a different sonofabitch. So this killer was playing by a different set of rules.

  “Keep Alice close,” Randall urged.

  Like Zander had to be told that. There was no way Alice would get away from him. He ended the call.

  Alice’s eyes were huge. “H-he shot her?”

  Zander nodded.

  “Is she…is she okay?”

  No, he didn’t think that Cara was okay. Not based on what Randall had told him. Dammit.

  Alice’s phone rang. She grabbed it from the bed. “It’s him.”

  Zander’s fingers closed around hers. “Don’t answer it. Fucking don’t.”

  “We have to find the missing woman!” Alice snapped.

  If she was missing. If the perp’s words hadn’t been a lie. A trap. He’d sent a text earlier ordering deputies over to the home of the suspected victim, Tiffany Shaw. They were searching for her.

  Zander didn’t want Alice talking to the bastard right then. “Let me talk to him.”

  “But—”

  “Maybe he thinks you’re dead, Alice. Maybe he thinks he just shot you.”

  She let go of the phone.

  Zander’s fingers slid over the screen, and he put the phone on speaker. “Who the fuck is this?”

  Grating robotic laughter was his answer. Then… “That wasn’t Alice.”

  “Listen, you—”

  “She didn’t walk like Alice. And her voice, when she called out—wasn’t Alice’s voice.”

  The bastard had been close enough to hear Cara. He’d been right there, and the agents in the woods had missed him. “You’re done. Do you hear me? Agents are closing in. They’re coming after you—”