Equus

by Rhonda Parrish

  “Why—?”

  Loki chuckled again. “Why?” he muttered, shaking his head.

  “Let me finish, you interrupting bastard.” I sighed. “Not ‘why me?’ Why now?”

  “Oh.” He smiled. “That is different. I suppose.”

  “I haven’t heard an answer.”

  “Demanding little filly, aren’t you?”

  “If my building didn’t have a no-pets clause, I’d turn into a horse and give you such a kicking.”

  “Fine,” Loki said. “Fine. Magic is coming back into the world. Hard. There’s your ‘now.’ As for the ‘why,’ you can probably imagine, I have enemies.”

  “Really?” I said, voice dripping with sarcasm. “You?”

  Loki waved off the remark. “So after I saved Asgard from itself, again, Odin stole my first kid.”

  “The eight-legged one?” I asked with a heavy dollop of sarcasm. He struck me as the type who had more than one bastard in his past.

  “Yes.” Loki’s lips twitched in irritation. “Sleipnir could run on the air and water as well as over land.”

  “Useful trick, that,” I said.

  Loki nodded. “Odin thought so. Used my son as his mount. That wasn’t enough for the one-eyed prick. Then he bred Sleipnir to make flying horses for his valkyries.”

  There was something in the way he’d spoken, a hurt still raw, genuine, which made me want to believe him. I’d almost certainly regret it.

  “Valkyries are real too?” I asked.

  “Everything’s real, hon. Except the stuff that isn’t.”

  That was no help. “They’re coming for me, aren’t they?”

  He nodded. “To them, you’re nothing but a beast of burden, something to be ridden. Not a person. A thing.”

  “Hmph.” That was not an attitude to which I was unaccustomed. “What if I don’t want to be their ride?”

  “They’ll either bind you in your other form, or they’ll kill you.”

  I rubbed at my eyes. “Jesus.”

  “Yeah, he’s not going to help you with this. Sorry.”

  The wine bottle was still half full. I grabbed it and slugged back a couple swallows. I could’ve used something stronger. “I’m going to change.”

  “Not sure there’s room in there for a horse,” Loki said, smirking.

  “Clothes.” Ass.

  Loki snatched the wine and had a pull. “I’ll be waiting.”

  I closed the door behind me, even though Loki had already seen me in my all-together. This wasn’t how I saw tonight going. Okay. It was sort of how I’d thought the date would go. Nudity? Hell yes. Horse transformation, shapeshifting date, and surprise family reunion? Hell no.

  I pulled on a fresh pair of underwear, yoga pants and a sports bra and hoodie. I packed a bag with a few spare undies and shirts and sweats too, just in case.

  Loki seemed disappointed with my practical attire.

  I didn’t care.

  I tucked my phone into my bag. “I’m ready.”

  “Now you sound like my great-great-great—” he kept going, I lost track of how many greats he actually spoke, but I presumed he was being accurate and not snarky, because accuracy in this instance would irritate me more. “—Granddaughter,” he finished.

  “I’ll take that as a compliment, I guess.”

  “Oh it is.”

  I asked. “Are we running or fighting?”

  “We run,” Loki said. “You’re not ready to fight them.”

  I looked over my shoulder as we left the condo building. I’d forgotten to turn my lights off. I hated having to leave my home behind. Especially without knowing where we were going, or when I’d be home. I had tenderloin thawing in the fridge. What would I tell work? Would they believe me?

  Of course they won’t believe you’re a magic horse. Don’t be fucking ridiculous.

  I sighed. It’d been a good job while it’d lasted. If Loki went on making my life “interesting” too long, I’d be sure to lose it. And default on my condo mortgage. I did not want to move back in with my parents. They already thought I was weird.

  “Since we’re running, where do we run to?”

  Loki smiled. There was that Cheshire grin again. “I know the perfect place.”

  That did not make me feel better.

  Loki led me toward the river, and not my car.

  He watched the sky nervously. “The sooner you master your body the better.”

  That made sense. I just…hated agreeing with him. “Fine,” I muttered. “Whatever you say.”

  He raised an eyebrow as if he were a cartoon character. “You should probably be more careful with your phrasing in the future.”

  I scowled, and Loki turned into a falcon, screeching with delight.

  I wondered how he did it. The falcon’s eyes glittered, as if he was reading my mind. I considered my carefully chosen clothes. They wouldn’t survive the transformation—assuming I could make myself change. I stripped, stuffing the clothes into my side bag as I hopped, foot to foot, on the cold asphalt at the edge of the parking lot. I willed myself to change.

  Nothing happened.

  Last time the change had come when I’d been afraid.

  Change. Change. Change.

  A car’s engine revved as it came into the parking lot, not slowing. The lights turned as the driver sought their spot. For now, I was hidden by a transformer box, but that wouldn’t last.

  Change.

  C’mon.

  I looked up at the sky, the damned falcon still circled.

  I hopped into the air.

  Change.

  I landed, wincing at the impact, and stamped my feet against the cold. Huddled with my arms across my torso. The cold wasn’t helping either.

  There was a sound like rain slamming on a tin roof, and I looked up. Three horses, complete with riders, ran on the air, as if hurtling down the side of a mountain toward my building. The horses stopped next to my balcony, and their riders—all women in white—hopped off. Glass shattered and they entered my apartment.

  Holy shit. The valkyries. I looked at the horses tied off to my balcony as if it were a hitching post. I was going to die.

  Or worse.

  I thought I heard someone call my name. I could barely hear from the pounding in my temples.

  “Michelle?”

  Shit. The driver was Veronica. My nosy neighbour across the hall.

  “Are you okay, Michelle? Should I call—Oh my God!”

  I hadn’t felt the change, same as the first time, one moment I was a woman, the next I was a horse. My hooves rang off the asphalt. She backed away, hands up as if trying to ward off attack and she ran. She’d seen me turn into a horse. There was no going back from that. My life, as I’d known it, was definitely over.

  I heard crashes from my apartment. The valkyries must be upset I wasn’t home. My “I don’t want to die” instincts fought with my “I just got my kitchen the way I liked it” anger.

  “Time to go,” Loki said.

  I ran into the air, and into the night.

  I think every kid grows up wanting a magic horse, but how many kids want to be a magic horse?

  This “gift” wasn’t something I’d asked for, but it was all I wanted anymore.

  To run. To fly.

  Nothing compared to this.

  Not work. Not food. Not sex.

  I could fly.

  It’s hard to describe the exhilaration of flying. High in the sky, north wind slapping against my body, I didn’t feel its chill, only the rush, as I ducked, and dived, and climbed and plummeted.

  In that tiny moment, all my troubles were forgotten.

  We landed in the Assiniboine Forest, a popular hiker’s destination, right inside the city, but fortunately not so popular at this time of night.

  “They won’t look for us here,” Loki said.

  “Why not?”

  He twirled around, fingers pointing at nothing. “Because it’s lousy with elves.”

  “Right,�
� I said. “Because of the elves.”

  I sighed. Elves being real would be the least weird thing about tonight, so I shut up and dressed. Loki was in clothes the moment he landed. Not the dark jeans and dress shirt he’d been wearing as “Ted” but a rumpled suit that looked tailored for a much larger man.

  I stared at Loki. “How come your clothes don’t get shredded when you change shape?”

  He shrugged, and smiled. “I’m more magic than you, I guess.”

  “Typical,” I muttered.

  Loki motioned for me to follow him deeper into the trees.

  I lost track of how long we walked in the stillness of wood, dead leaves crunching under our feet, and misted breath drifting to join the clouds.

  Loki broke the silence. “So…are you freaked out?”

  A little. I didn’t want to admit it, and ultimately, what I felt above all, was awesome. “I’m great,” I said. And I meant it.

  “You should keep practicing,” Loki said, out of nowhere. “‘Til the change is second nature.”

  There was room on the foot path, and the cool night air didn’t bother me. It was the in-between step that was the problem.

  “You just want to see me strip, you perv.”

  “It is our third date,” he said, winking.

  I gave him a shove, and he staggered. “Give it a rest. It’s not going to happen. It was never going to happen. Grandma.”

  His smirk told me he knew the lie in my words, but, at the very least, he did shut up.

  For a while.

  “How could you not suspect you’re at least part horse?” Loki asked.

  My eyes narrowed. “You need to tread very carefully, god or no.”

  Loki’s voice was shiny as a new penny. “You’re long of limb. Long of face. You don’t eat meat. Like shoes.”

  “Oh yeah, so obvious now that you point it out.”

  He shrugged. “It was all there.”

  I hurled my side bag at him and made the change.

  Changing shape was exhausting. My stomach growled, and my body was slick with sweat. I made the change standing in place, I made it running. I made it jumping, and I made it backing up. Learning to speak in my horse body had been the biggest challenge. My mouth and tongue didn’t want to form the human words. By the time Loki was satisfied, I felt as if I’d been running all night.

  “You’ll need to eat to keep up your strength,” Loki said, reaching into my bag and passing me an apple.

  I bit into it gratefully. It tasted amazing. Juicy, fresh. I’d been so worried about having enough clothing to survive any accidental transformations, I hadn’t thought about food. I had been full from dinner, and flushed with the excitement and terror of my new crazy life.

  “Eat,” Loki said, passing me a protein bar.

  I wondered where he was getting the food, because it sure hadn’t come from my kitchen.

  “You need to eat more,” he said.

  My eyes narrowed. I felt like he was leading up to something…

  “Like a horse!” he hollered, slapping his thigh.

  I should’ve slapped him, but it only reminded me of our—my—predicament. “They’ll never stop, will they?”

  “No.”

  My eyes fell. That single simple word felt so damned defeating. Loki nudged my chin up. I didn’t see any mischief in his eyes. No sass. Nothing but the truth when he said, “But I’ll never stop either.”

  “Shit.” I didn’t know if I found Loki’s promise comforting.

  “We’ll get you trained up, and keep you on the run. I’ll play interference for you when I can. You’ll be fine. You’re a sharp little filly.”

  I bristled at the “compliment.” All that was missing was him patting me on the head, like a pet. Maybe that’s all I was to him. “If you were so good at interference, those flying bitches would be shy three horses.”

  His eyes dropped. I wasn’t sure if it was embarrassment, or if I’d hurt his feelings. I didn’t feel great about either result. Regardless of what had got me in this scenario, Loki was my only ally, my only way out of it. And he was trying to help. But I also needed to help myself. I couldn’t run forever.

  “I’m sorry,” I said. “What I said…it was cruel, and unnecessary.”

  “But true,” he said. “I do mourn the loss of any of my children. No matter the time or generations between us.”

  “We’ve got to teach the valkyries not to come at me,” I said.

  “That means fighting, not running,” Loki said. “You up for that?”

  “I’ll have to be.”

  “Look,” I hissed. “They’re up there.”

  Backlit against clouds, glowing with moonlight, were the valkyries. At least, I assumed it was them. Unless I was suddenly in a Johnny Cash song, who else could it be? Riding horses. In the air.

  “Are you out of your damned mind?” Loki jerked me under a branch.

  “You think they see us?”

  “I wouldn’t put it past them.” He shook his head. “I wouldn’t put anything past them.”

  “How can we…”

  “Kill them?”

  It sounded so permanent when he said it, but I was glad he did. To be able to say the words out loud made them real. Made it a real thing that I believed I could do. I didn’t like to think I could actually kill.

  I asked, “Can we bribe them?”

  Loki shook his head. “You’re the only thing they want.”

  I ground my teeth. He wasn’t helping. “Can I outrun them?”

  “Probably in a straight shot, but their horses are more used to being horses than you so they’ll be able to outmaneuver you, whether they have armed ladies on them or not.”

  When I turned around, a tall, muscular woman stood in Loki’s place. The woman wore a white-feathered cloak, white leathers. With her pale skin, and white-gold hair, she looked like an apparition more than a real lady. I jumped back, stifling a scream. She glowered, holding a spear across her thighs with both hands. Then she winked.

  Bloody Loki.

  “This is what they’ll look like,” the woman said in Loki’s voice. “The cloaks will allow them to glide. Their spears will kill anything they scratch, and let me tell you, it’s not a fun way to go.”

  “Seriously?”

  “Ayup.”

  “How do they control their…” What to say? Horses? Mounts? Slaves?”

  “How will they control you?” Loki asked. “Is that what you mean?”

  “Yeah.”

  “They have bridles woven from the hair of my son,” he said. “Like a lasso. If they get that around your neck, you’re done. And worse, while you’re bound, you won’t care.”

  There was something we could use… “Without the bridles?”

  “You’ll still be you.”

  I breathed a sigh of relief, so naturally, Loki had to ruin things. “Assuming they haven’t broken you.”

  “If we lose the bridles, the horses will lose them.”

  “I’m listening.”

  “If they don’t have…air superiority, they can’t outrun me. The cloaks let them glide, not fly, and I run on air. Get the horses away from them, and they can’t catch me. And if they’re captured…” I needed to know what to call them—what to call myself.

  “Vindafolöld?” he offered. “It means wind foals.”

  More poetic than I expected from the likes of him. “If we scatter the…vindafolöld, they’ll never get all of us. With luck, the valkyries leave with nothing.”

  Loki smiled. “I’m glad to be a part of this plan.”

  “What plan?”

  Loki laughed maniacally. “Exactly.”

  The ground whizzed by below us. If I concentrated on the movement of the ground, and not that I had a mythical god riding my back, I could pretend I was looking out the window of an airplane.

  The moment never lasted.

  I did have a god riding me.

  “Tally ho!” Loki yelled.

  I shook my head. The
salvation he promised couldn’t be worth the irritation.

  “There they are,” Loki called, gesturing with his spear.

  The valkyries circled the forest, lingering over the river. Moonlight cast their shadows over the water, making it seem as if there were more of them. As if they had shadowy followers waiting to help bring me down.

  I wanted to turn back. I wanted to run forever. Loki must’ve felt my hesitation. He uttered a yipping war cry that would’ve put Xena to shame and could’ve been heard in Saskatoon.

  The valkyries stopped their circling, and swung around to face us. It was mildly interesting to note how they did so, they didn’t turn in a wide arc like flying birds would have, instead they wheeled as if the air were solid, and charged in a v-shape, straight at us.

  “I really don’t like this plan anymore.”

  “It’s your plan,” Loki said.

  I had nothing to say to that. I hated that he was correct. I hated being in this situation. But the only way out was through. Through three murderous goddesses who could kill me with a scratch. The only things stopping them were that they’d prefer to enslave me, my horny ultimate great grandmother, and a horse body I was still learning to use.

  Loki patted my neck, and offered me a knife by the blade. I bit down on the hilt, trying not to think of how ridiculous I must look.

  The valkyries were silent, other than the clatter of their steeds’ hooves against the sky. Silent. Grim. Implacable. We barrelled toward one another. The timing would be hard to judge.

  “Almost…almost…almost…” Loki’s whispered.

  Now.

  Loki leapt from my back, screaming, “This one is mine!”

  I barely heard him. I changed. It came, not effortlessly, but immediately.

  My galloping hooves lost their purchase on the air. My legs ran against nothing and my arms pinwheeled as I struggled for balance I didn’t have time to retain. The knife that’d felt so tiny and delicate a moment before suddenly felt huge, and the handle pained my jaw to contain.

  I grabbed the valkyrie’s bridle. My shoulder wrenched as my fingers closed around the braided horse hair. My momentum swung me against the horse’s flank. I almost dropped the knife getting it in hand, but I held on.

  “What in Hel?” the valkyrie cried.