What Comes Next

by Desni Dantone

“What . . . what are you doing?” She sounded like she’d just run a few laps around the field, and I secretly loved that my mere presence had that effect on her.

  “What’s it look like?” I gave her my get-out-of-trouble grin. “I’m waiting for you.”

  She glanced around the hallway as if looking for someone else. Seeing that we were completely alone, she swallowed hard. Her feet carried her backwards, until she bumped into the wall behind her. Still close enough to touch if I reached out. Thank God for the closet-sized hallway in the back of The Pit.

  “How did it go with the scout?” she asked.

  I inched closer, until my toes bumped hers. “He’s sending his boss.”

  “Ben, that’s great!” Her arms flinched as if she’d momentarily considered throwing them around my neck.

  I decided to do the next best thing, and curled my hands around her waist. A small gasp slipped between her lips when I used the length of my body to pin her to the wall.

  “You were there,” I told her. “I saw you.”

  “Ma and Pop wanted to go.” Her head dropped, and her eyes lowered to where our feet were now entangled.

  I put a finger under her chin to guide her eyes back up to mine. “I only saw you . . .”

  Her shaky breath warmed my cheek as I angled toward her waiting lips. The moment we touched I forgot about all the reasons I had given myself for staying away from her. I forgot about everything, except what Ana’s lips felt like against mine.

  They were just as soft and supple as they were the last time I’d kissed her. Not warm, but slightly chilled from the ice cream she’d recently eaten. She tasted like a strawberry sundae, and I greedily parted her lips to seek more of her sweetness.

  Her head tipped back as I took what I wanted. A tiny whimper came from her throat, and I dug my fingers into her waist at the intoxicating sound. I wanted to make her do it again. I wanted to stop now so that I wasn’t tempted to try. I didn’t know what the fuck I wanted.

  But God if it wasn’t the sexiest sound in the world, and damn if it didn’t put my body on full alert. To hell with short skirts and easy girls. I wanted wide-eyed, strawberry-flavored innocence. I wanted Ana.

  I doubted she knew what she’d done to me, even with the proof straining against the front of my jeans between our tightly pressed bodies. I was glad she had no idea. Because that wasn’t what this was about. Not this time, and not with her.

  I had never kissed a girl with this much intensity, and it not lead to the next level fast. With Ana, my only expectation was more kissing, on top of a lot more kissing.

  Only after my chest started to burn from a lack of oxygen, did I finally stop. I slowly withdrew, taking my time as I eased us toward the finish line. Sealing the kiss with a soft brush against her upper lip, I finally pulled away.

  Ana’s arms slid from their position around my neck, and moved slowly over my shoulders before dropping to her sides. Her glazed eyes fixed on a spot in the center of my chest as she heaved one heavy breath after another. I stared at her well-kissed, swollen lips as they worked to ask any one of the thousand questions she probably had.

  She finally settled on one. “What was that?”

  I tilted my head, and glanced down at what was left of my arousal. No, I didn’t think she was asking about that. I went with an explanation for the more likely source of her question.

  “I wanted the perfect end to the perfect day,” I explained softly. Her eyes slowly lifted to mine with sudden clarity. I offered her a brief smile before pressing my face into her neck. With my lips grazing her ear, I whispered, “And that was perfect.”

  That was where I left her when I backed away. With a parting smile, I pushed out the rear emergency exit to avoid the mob in the diner and arcade. Not to mention the questioning gaze of Marly—because something told me that woman was on to me.

  Maybe instead of running away from Marly, I should ask her what was happening. Whatever it was, it wasn’t something I’d encountered before. I had no idea what was happening between Ana and me. All I knew was that I liked it.

  And I was already counting down to the next time I got to try to figure it out.

  That weekend, waiting to hear from the scout at UNC, was the longest weekend of my life. Finally, after school on Monday, I got the word. Mr. Benton was scheduled to come to the home game in two weeks against our biggest rivals. Guaranteed to be a good game, and a good test of my ability to play.

  Between practice with the team, my extra training with the coach, and Marly’s firm hand, I didn’t see Ana nearly as much as I wanted to. By Wednesday afternoon, after days of nothing more than a few stolen glances between classes, I was in full-blown withdrawal.

  It didn’t help matters that she had worn a skirt to school today. Not that I thought she’d purposefully done it with the knowledge of what it would do to me. She wasn’t wired like that.

  No, it was my own damn fault I saw her legs every time I closed my eyes. Hell of a thing to be obsessing over in the middle of a game. Good thing it wasn’t the game. I had another week before I had to worry about that one. This game was a gimme, against one of the least competitive teams in the district. No challenge. No excitement.

  Very few fans in the stands, because it was an away game, over half an hour away. The only thing that kept my mind off of Ana was the chatter on the bench. But soon, even that took a direction I hadn’t been prepared for.

  After scoring a run to put us up by eight, one of my teammates noisily slid into the empty space beside me on the bench. His elbow nudged my arm. “Can I ask you something, man?”

  I glanced over at Caleb from under the rim of my hat, and shrugged.

  “Do you have any pointers for that Ana girl?”

  He grinned at me like we shared a secret. I could have been staring in a mirror, looking at the cocky, hot shot grin that used to be permanently plastered on my face, and I didn’t like seeing it on this kid’s face when Ana’s name came out of his mouth. Immediately, my defenses shot up.

  “Pointers?” I returned coolly. “For what?”

  “I’m supposed to take her out on Saturday, and . . . I know you two had a thing . . . thought maybe you’d have some tips. She seems a little, uh . . . hard.”

  If, by that, he meant not easy, then he was absolutely correct. My jaw clenched as a few thoughts came to me. One, no way in hell was Ana going to go out with this guy. She might not have a clue what these boys were after, but I did. Two, when had she agreed to go out with him? Last I heard from her, she was turning offers down because she was grounded. I knew her punishment ended Saturday, but when had she agreed?

  That was the question I focused on now. “When did this happen?”

  “Ah, nothing’s happened yet.”

  My hand automatically fisted at the cunning grin on his face. The need for answers kept me from acting on my need to punch something. “No. When did you ask her out?”

  “I don’t know . . .” His expression turned quizzical. “The other night, at The Pit.”

  I couldn’t mask my surprise. “After our game?” The night I kissed her outside the bathrooms?

  “Yeah. She was there with her family, I think,” he answered brusquely. “So any tips?”

  I ignored him. As I watched the play unfold on the field, I wondered if she had agreed to go out with Caleb before I’d shown up. Or after? As I gathered my glove and prepared to take the field, my mind wasn’t on baseball . . . but whether or not Ana had said yes to a date after I’d kissed her that night.

  What happened next was the result of an extremely boring game followed by a thirty-minute bus ride home. The longer I stared at the back of the seat in front of me, the more determined I became to do something. Not only do something, but do it now.

  On some completely rational level, I realized I would likely get better results in the light of a new day, but I couldn’t wait. I couldn’t sleep until the issue was resolved.

  As I climbed onto the slanted porch roof of the Max
wells’ farmhouse, I realized that there were a few possible ways my night could end. Bruised and bloody, or locked up in the county jail were the two most likely scenarios. This actually going well, and ending with the outcome I’d come here in hopes of getting, rounded out the bottom of the list.

  Not even my own doubts could stop me from trying now, as I crawled under the first window—the one I was about ninety percent sure looked into Joe and Marly’s room—to get to the second window. I pressed my face to the glass, and breathed a sigh of relief when I saw Ana asleep in her bed. I wrapped gently on the glass, but she didn’t stir. Shaking my head, I wrapped again, louder. Still nothing.

  “Dammit, Ana,” I muttered.

  I considered the repercussions of my next move briefly. They would be bad—very bad—but I went ahead with the half-brained idea anyway. I had the window lifted halfway when a loud creak froze every muscle in my body. I tilted my head to the side, and listened for movement from elsewhere in the house. Obviously Ana hadn’t flinched, but I was starting to suspect nothing short of a hurricane could wake that girl.

  When no one came to inspect the noise, I pushed the window the rest of the way open, and climbed into the room. In a few long strides, I was standing by the bed, looking down at Ana as she slept.

  She was curled up on her side, her back to me. The thin sheet that covered her had slid down, coming barely to her midriff. As my eyes adjusted to the darkness I could see the glistening of her white nightgown. One strap had slipped off her shoulder in an unintentionally seductive manner, and my fingers itched to slide it down even farther.

  My heart raced and my head clouded at the sight of her smooth skin. I forced myself to focus. I needed to focus. If I startled her now and she screamed, everything would be ruined. For starters, Joe and Marly would never let me near her again if they caught me in here. I wouldn’t get the chance to tell her what I desperately needed to tell her tonight.

  I took a deep breath to steady myself, then sat down gently on the edge of the bed. At the same time, I placed my hand over her mouth to stifle any startled cries.

  As expected, her eyes snapped open and widened in fear. My hand absorbed a muffled scream.

  “Shh. It’s me, Ben,” I whispered quickly. I gave her a moment to settle before I asked, “You’re not going to scream?”

  Her head moved from side to side. She may not scream, but her eyes promised that my uninvited intrusion would not go unpunished.

  “Don’t hit me,” I added for good measure.

  Her eyes narrowed fractionally. I didn’t like my chances, but I slowly lifted my hand. She immediately flopped over onto her back and shot straight up, forcing me to lean back to avoid having my nose broken by her forehead.

  “Are you crazy?” she whispered harshly. “What are you doing in here?”

  She desperately tugged at the sheet pooled around her waist in an attempt to shield herself from my wandering eyes. It didn’t work. The more she fought with the sheet, the more of a view I got.

  Not that I tried to look. If anything, I tried not to look.

  “I need to talk to you,” I managed to get out.

  “Right now?”

  She gave up on the sheet, and shoved my shoulder with enough force to push me off the bed. I caught myself from falling on the floor as she shot to her feet. She stomped across the room to snatch up a stray sweatshirt laying on the floor, and slipped it over her head. A pair of flimsy cotton shorts followed, and I couldn’t deny my disappointment at how quickly she’d gotten dressed.

  Murderous eyes swung on me as I quietly approached her. This wasn’t going the way I had hoped it would. I needed to get through this before I talked myself out of it.

  “Now or never,” I told myself with a sigh.

  “What?” she hissed.

  “Come with me.” I snatched her hand and steered her toward the window. She resisted initially, only relenting after she likely realized the only way she was going to get an explanation for what I was doing here at this time of night was to follow me outside.

  We squeezed through the window and crept to the edge of the roof before jumping. I took her hand the moment her feet hit the ground, and together we dashed toward the barn. More than once, she tried to rip her hand out of mine, but I only held on tighter. Finally, hidden amongst the shadows behind the barn, I released her.

  I had to give Ben some credit. He was brave, and he had my attention. I was definitely curious to hear what had prompted him to sneak into my room at this late hour.

  The uncertainty in his wide, dark eyes not only boosted my self-confidence, but also fluttered my heart. I couldn’t deny he was incredibly handsome—no one could. But the vulnerability I saw in him at that moment tugged at me even more than his dreamy eyes and perfect face.

  I reminded myself that I needed to be careful with him. I stifled the memory of what I had felt when he kissed me last week, and instead reminded myself of some of the hurtful things he had said to me.

  Mistake. Shouldn’t have happened. Won’t do it again.

  Heartbroken and alone . . . I would not be either.

  With my feet planted, arms folded across my chest, and my hard eyes focused on him, I demanded, “Start talking, Ben.”

  “Shit,” he muttered, barely loud enough for me to hear. His stance shifted under the heavy weight of uncertainty before his gaze met mine. “I’m sorry. Alright? I’m . . . really sorry.”

  I swallowed hard. If this was another “sorry for kissing you” apology . . .

  “You’re sorry?” I scoffed, unable to contain my annoyance. “You dragged me out of bed in the middle of the night to tell me you’re sorry?”

  “Among other things,” he muttered. “I know it probably sounds stupid—”

  “Probably?”

  “—but this couldn’t wait. I couldn’t wait.”

  “You couldn’t wait to make sure I understood you shouldn’t have kissed me . . . again. You couldn’t wait to remind me that what happened at The Pit was a mistake—”

  “No, Ana! What? No. That’s not . . .” He looked at me pleadingly, as if willing me to understand the purpose of his visit, to know exactly what he was apologizing for, without saying the words.

  I needed the words, because I honestly had no clue what he was apologizing for, if not for kissing me again. “Then what is it, Ben?”

  “This would be a lot easier if you weren’t glaring at me like—”

  “Ben.”

  “Okay. Sorry.” He sucked in a sharp breath. “I lied to you. I’ve been lying to you . . .”

  That was the exact opposite of what I had hoped would come out of his mouth. Maybe closer to what I had expected, but definitely not what I had hoped. My head bowed with disappointment. I shook it once at the ground before turning on my heels. “I’m not listening to this.”

  “It wasn’t a mistake, Ana!” He shouted to my back, causing my steps to falter. “Kissing you wasn’t a mistake. I’m not sorry about it. What I said before . . . I didn’t mean it.”

  I turned, and silently studied him for several heavy seconds, looking for signs of deception. When I didn’t see any, I took the bait. “Why?”

  “Why did I lie about that?” He shrugged. “I honestly don’t know. I think kissing you . . . it scared me. The way I feel about you scares me. There’s so many reasons why it shouldn’t have happened, but honestly . . . I don’t give a damn about those reasons anymore.”

  The way he feels about me?

  Now this had turned in a direction that tripped up a tiny piece of my heart. Or not-so-tiny. It might have been a big piece. Actually, I was pretty sure it was a big piece, because my chest suddenly hurt too much to breath. I felt light enough to fly when Ben narrowed the distance between us with slow and cautious steps.

  “That didn’t work out for me too well,” he continued softly. “Of course, it took me awhile to realize it, and to realize how much my stupidity hurt you in the process. So for that, and so much more, I’m sorry.” />
  He stepped close enough to touch. I put my hand out, pressing my palm to his chest. I wasn’t sure whether I did it to stop him from coming any closer, or just to touch him in some way. Touching him grounded me, even if my pulse skyrocketed at the same time. I was pleasantly surprised to feel his heart racing as fast as mine.

  He peered down at me, and I got the impression he was waiting for some sort of response. My thoughts were too jumbled, my heart at war with my brain, to offer much of anything yet. Not without some more answers.

  “Why now?” I asked. “Why tell me this now?”

  “Because I didn’t want to be too late.”

  I shook my head. “Too la—”

  “Don’t go out with Caleb Ritchey,” he jumped in eagerly.

  Initially, I was confused. I wondered how he knew about my date with the junior who hadn’t stopped pestering me all of last week. Not until I’d finally agreed to go out with him when he cornered me at The Pit—about ten minutes before I found Ben waiting for me outside the bathrooms . . .

  Before I could settle into a mental reenactment of what happened next, a hint of anger bubbled to the surface. This all seemed a little too familiar.

  My mouth twisted into a wry smile. “Is that what this is about? Just more of your big brother interference? You think you can—”

  “No,” Ben quickly interjected. He pushed forward another step, slipping through my invisible boundary. “I don’t want you to go out with Caleb, because . . .”

  “What, Ben? What’s wrong with this one?”

  One corner of his mouth lifted. “For starters, he’s not me.”

  “What?”

  He sighed like my cluelessness was amusing to him. “Ana, I want you to go out with me.”

  “But . . . you . . . I . . .”

  “Take your time.” Ben grinned. “Think about it.”

  I stared at our feet, the ground, the chipping paint on the side of the barn—everywhere but in the general vicinity of Ben’s eyes. He didn’t want me to go out with Caleb, because . . .

  I couldn’t even finish that thought. It was so unexpected, so random, so . . .