Heads, You Lose!

by R. L. Stine

  TITLE PAGE

  MEET JONATHAN CHILLER …

  PART ONE

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  PART TWO

  6

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  EPILOGUE

  TEASER

  HORRORLAND TRADING CARD

  ABOUT THE AUTHOR

  ALSO AVAILABLE

  COPYRIGHT

  He owns Chiller House, the HorrorLand gift shop. Sometimes he doesn’t let kids pay for their souvenirs. Chiller tells them, “You can pay me next time.”

  What does he mean by next time? What is Chiller’s big plan?

  Go ahead — the gates are opening. Enter HorrorLand. This time you might be permitted to leave … but for how long? Jonathan Chiller is waiting — to make sure you TAKE A LITTLE HORROR HOME WITH YOU!

  I pulled my floppy blue cap down low on my forehead and gazed around Zombie Plaza. It was a hot, sunny day, and HorrorLand Theme Park was jammed with kids and families. “This is so awesome!” I said to my friend Ryan Chang. “Can you believe we finally made it here?” Ryan just nodded. He’s the quiet type. I could see my reflection in his round, silvery sunglasses. He never takes the sunglasses off.

  Ryan wore a black T-shirt and black cargo shorts. He always wears black. Ryan is the shortest, shrimpiest kid in our class, but he’s totally cool.

  “I think that’s the magic store over there,” I said, pointing across the plaza.

  And a harsh, croaky voice rasped in my ear: “Don’t point, Jessica. It’s not polite to point.”

  “Huh?” I spun around.

  No one there.

  I blinked. And then I figured it out.

  Ryan laughed. “I got you.”

  “No way,” I said. I gave his shoulder a hard shove. “I knew it was you.”

  Ryan can throw his voice. So can I. We’re both really excellent ventriloquists. We’re into magic tricks, too.

  Ryan rubbed his shoulder. He straightened the shades over his eyes.

  “Pick on someone your own size, Jessica,” he muttered.

  That’s one of our little jokes since I’m nearly a foot taller than him. Ryan and I have a lot of little jokes. I guess it’s because we’ve lived next door to each other since we were three.

  We’re twelve now, and it’s like we’re brother and sister. Sometimes we fight like a brother and sister. And sometimes we drive our other friends crazy by constantly playing tricks on each other. But most of the time we’re cool together.

  My name is Jessica Bowen, and you’re probably wondering why Ryan and I are so into tricks and ventriloquism and stuff like that. Well, the answer is easy. My dad — sometimes known as The Amazing Billy Bowen — is a birthday party ventriloquist and magician.

  He does three or four birthday parties a week. He’s very popular. Sometimes he’s even on TV.

  Dad taught us how to throw our voices when we were five. Ryan and I used to put on magic shows when we were in second grade!

  And that’s why the magic shop was our first stop at HorrorLand.

  We took off across the plaza and almost ran into a green-and-purple food cart. The sign on the side read: CHIHUAHUA TENDERS. MADE WITH REAL CHIHUAHUA BITS!

  “That’s sick,” I said. We have two Chihuahuas at home named Abra and Cadabra. They are part of Dad’s magic act. He pulls them out of his coat sleeves. The dogs love it.

  The magic shop stood next to a big theater. In dark ghostly letters the marquee read: THE HAUNTED THEATER. MONDO THE MAGICAL — NOW APPEARING (AND DISAPPEARING)!

  “Awesome. Let’s see when the next show goes on,” I said.

  But Ryan was already hurrying into the shop.

  I pulled open the door, and two kids rushed out. One of them was holding a huge deck of cards. The other had one of those fake little guillotines in his hand. The kind where you put your finger in. Then you push down on the blade, and it looks like it slices off your finger.

  It’s a pretty good trick. I think Ryan and I learned it when we were four.

  The shop looked small on the outside, but it stretched really far back. I could see two long aisles with shelves and shelves of magic tricks. A shiny suit of armor stood at the end of one aisle. It had a magic wand gripped in its metal glove. A stuffed rabbit poked out from the open visor.

  “Jessica, check out these chains and padlocks,” Ryan said. He tugged at a heavy silver lock, and it popped right open. “Perfect for quick escapes.”

  He turned to me. “Does your dad ever do an escape from a locked trunk?”

  “No way,” I said. “That’s too scary for kids.”

  Dad has to be careful. If he makes the kids cry, he won’t be invited to perform at many birthday parties!

  I picked up a pair of Chinese puzzle rings. I slapped them together, then pulled them apart. Easy.

  I turned and saw Ryan pick up a metal cuff. It looked like it had sharp teeth. “This is a mean-looking handcuff,” he said.

  I opened a box of playing cards. I pulled out the deck and examined it. Every card in the deck was the ace of spades.

  I started to put the cards back when I heard a deafening SNAP.

  Then I heard a scream.

  I turned — and saw the metal cuff clamped around Ryan’s wrist.

  “Jessica, HELP ME!” he shrieked. “It HURTS! It HURTS! Ohhh, help! MY HAND IS BROKEN!”

  Of course, I didn’t fall for it.

  Ryan is a good actor. But he’s tried this kind of gag too many times to fool me. I didn’t even flinch. Really.

  “Where’s the blood?” I asked.

  Ryan shrugged. “Hey, I almost got you.”

  “No, you didn’t,” I said. I grabbed his arm and pried the metal cuff off. I snapped it a few times between my hands. “Sweet.”

  Ryan backed away from me. I didn’t like the grin on his face. “What?” I said. “Come on. What’s so funny?”

  He didn’t answer. Instead, he reached into his back pocket and pulled out a pink cell phone.

  My phone!

  “You thief!” I cried. “You pickpocket! How did you get that?”

  His grin grew wider. “It’s easy if you’re good.”

  I could see my reflection in his silver sunglasses. I looked angry. “Give it back,” I said.

  He started to hand the phone to me. Then, as I grabbed for it, he swung it out of my reach.

  “Hey! Not funny!” I said. I gave him a shove. I didn’t mean to push him that hard. Sometimes I forget how light he is.

  He went flying backward — and tumbled right into a big man just entering the shop. The man wore a black tuxedo, bow tie, and top hat. Mondo the Magical!

  Mondo had a round red face under slicked-down black hair. He had a bushy black mustache that seemed to sprout from his huge nose. His nose looked just like a lightbulb!

  He stared at us. His bushy eyebrows wriggled up and down like caterpillars. His tuxedo shirt bulged over his big belly.

  “Do you want to buy that handcuff trick?” he asked me. He had a deep, growly voice.

  I gazed down at it. I didn’t realize I was still holding it. “Uh … no,” I said. I dropped it onto the shelf. “Just looking at it.”

  “It’s a good trick,” Mondo said. “It’ll make your parents scre
am.”

  “I don’t think so,” I said.

  He sighed and pulled off the top hat. His black hair glistened with sweat. “Did you kiddos catch my show?” he asked.

  “Not yet,” Ryan said. “But we want to. We’re totally into magic.”

  Mondo nodded. “The last one was the worst show I ever did,” he muttered. He waggled his hands. “I’m totally butterfingers today. Even my best trick went wrong.”

  “What’s your best trick?” I asked.

  “The one where I pull a hat out of a rabbit,” he said.

  He set the hat down on a counter. Then he pulled a live rabbit out from under his tuxedo jacket. “Would you believe the rabbit started to gag? I couldn’t get the hat out!”

  Shaking his head, he carried the rabbit to a cage against the wall.

  “My dad says sometimes the spirits of magic are just against you,” I said.

  Mondo spun around. “Who is your dad?”

  “He’s a magician, too,” I said. “He does birthday parties back home in Tampa.”

  Mondo’s eyes flashed, and his fat eyebrows rolled up and down. “Maybe you’d like to buy your dad a new magic trick? I’ve got some tricks you kiddos have probably never seen before. I collect them from all over the world — and some from other planets!”

  I glanced around at the shelves of tricks. “They look pretty expensive,” I said.

  Ryan picked up a thick rope. One end was tied in a loop. Ryan is totally into rope tricks. He ties knots in a rope. Then he shakes the rope and the knots magically disappear.

  “That’s a very good rope trick you’ve got there,” Mondo said. “One of my best. This trick was handed down from the ancient first Raja of the Kingdom of Gold.”

  He took the rope from Ryan’s hand. “Bet your dad doesn’t know this one,” he said to me.

  “How does it work?” Ryan asked.

  “Watch.” Mondo lowered the loop around his big waist. Then he tightened it like a belt.

  “Here. Take this,” he told Ryan. He handed Ryan the other end. “See? I’ve got the loop around me. Now, pull the rope as hard as you can. Give it a good tug.”

  “And what will happen?” Ryan asked. “Do you make the loop disappear?”

  “That’s too easy,” Mondo replied. “I make the whole rope disappear!”

  “Cool,” I said. I reached out and gave the rope a squeeze. It was a real rope. How was Mondo going to make it disappear right from Ryan’s hands?

  Ryan gripped the rope in both hands. He gave it a hard tug.

  “Go ahead. Pull. Pull!” Mondo ordered. “Pull it with all your strength.”

  Ryan gave another hard tug. He backed down the long aisle, pulling the rope.

  Mondo shut his eyes. He grunted and groaned. “Pull. Pull.” He strained against the rope belt.

  Ryan tugged again.

  The rope didn’t vanish.

  Mondo opened his eyes. His face was red. He had droplets of sweat on his forehead. “Not my day,” he said with a sigh. “Let’s try another trick.” He lifted the loop over his head and tossed the rope onto the floor.

  He mopped his forehead with the back of his hand. “What’s your name, kiddo?” he asked me.

  “Jessica,” I said. “Jessica Bowen.”

  “Well, you’re right, Jessica,” he said. “Some days the spirits of magic are against you.”

  He turned and started down the aisle. His tuxedo pockets bulged. I could see he had a lot of stuff hidden in them. “I know I have some tricks you will love,” he said.

  I noticed a long box lying flat on the floor. The lid was decorated with hand-painted red and yellow flowers.

  “What’s this wooden box?” I asked. “It looks like a coffin.”

  “It’s called the Forever Box,” Mondo said. He lifted the lid. The inside of the box was lined in red velvet. “If you lie in this box and I close the lid, you disappear forever.”

  “How does it work?” I asked.

  “Show us,” Ryan said. He jumped into the box. He settled onto his back. He’s so small, he fit with room to spare.

  “You sure?” Mondo asked.

  “Sure,” Ryan said.

  Mondo started to lower the lid. He gazed at me. “Say good-bye to your friend — forever.”

  Ryan and I both laughed.

  We didn’t know that was the beginning of all the horror.

  Mondo leaned down and spoke to Ryan. “Cross your arms tightly over your chest,” he said. “You are about to take a long journey. Do you have any last words?”

  “Live long and prosper!” Ryan cried. What a goof.

  “Excellent last words,” Mondo said.

  He kept his eyes on me as he slowly lowered the lid. It shut with a soft whump. Mondo pushed back the tails of his tuxedo jacket. Then he leaned over the box and muttered some magical words. “Vanno … vanno … vanish!”

  He’s so cornball, I thought. My dad would think this was a riot.

  “Go ahead, Jessica,” Mondo said, stepping back. “Pull open the lid of the Forever Box.”

  I gripped the edge with both hands and raised the lid.

  Sure enough, Ryan was gone.

  I bent down and tapped the sides of the box. Solid wood.

  “Sweet,” I said. I stood back up and turned to Mondo. He had a toothy grin under his mustache. “The box has a fake bottom, right?” I asked.

  “No. Not right,” Mondo said. “The back panel is fake. It slides open. Go ahead. Slide it. Your friend is behind it.”

  I leaned over the front of the box. I saw a little handle down low on the back panel. I grabbed it and slid the panel open.

  No Ryan.

  Mondo and I both stared at the empty hidden compartment.

  I laughed. “Awesome!” I said. “Where is he hiding? Is there another hidden compartment?”

  But Mondo’s smile had faded. His eyebrows crinkled up until they mashed into one furrowed eyebrow. “Whoa,” he muttered. He stared down at the empty box. “Whoa.”

  “Where is he?” I repeated.

  Mondo gently moved me aside. Then he pushed back his jacket again and carefully squeezed into the box. He got down on his hands and knees and began tapping all the sides with the back of one hand.

  “Hey, kiddo!” he shouted. “Kiddo — where are you? Are you playing a trick on the magician?”

  I crossed my arms in front of me and watched. I really didn’t know what to think. Mondo had to be putting on an act. This was just a trick. He was showing off his acting skills. Trying to scare me.

  “Kiddo — you can come out now!” Mondo boomed. He tapped the sides some more. “This isn’t funny.”

  Finally, he grabbed the front of the box and hoisted himself to his feet. His face was pale, dripping with sweat. He shook his head.

  “Where is he?” he murmured, talking to himself.

  Then he turned to me. “This is no joke,” he said. “This has never happened to me. Your friend is gone!”

  I started to laugh. But the expression on his face made me stop. Why was he trembling like that?

  Was he serious?

  He wiped sweat from his mustache. Then he slowly climbed out of the box. “I don’t understand … I don’t understand,” he muttered. “It’s a simple trick.”

  I knelt next to the box and checked for a fake bottom. No. I couldn’t find one.

  “Ryan?” I called. “Ryan? Are you in there?”

  No answer.

  I felt a chill at the back of my neck. My mouth suddenly felt dry. I stood up and turned to Mondo.

  He had pulled off his tuxedo jacket. His white shirt had big sweat stains under the armpits. “It’s a bad-luck day,” Mondo said softly. “I should never have tried that trick.”

  I grabbed his sleeve. “But it’s just a trick, right? Let’s get serious here. Ryan didn’t really disappear into thin air.”

  Another chill at the back of my neck.

  “Are your parents in the park?” Mondo asked. “Do you have a cell phon
e? I think you’d better call them.”

  “Huh?” My mouth dropped open.

  Mondo’s eyes locked on mine. “We have a real problem here,” he said. “I wish I was joking, Jessica. But I’m not.”

  I swallowed. My mouth felt like cotton. My mind whirred with all kinds of crazy thoughts.

  I’m not the kind of girl who gets scared. I don’t scream at scary movies. And I’m not afraid to touch bugs or snakes.

  My dad says I’m either brave or nuts.

  He means it as a compliment.

  But staring at Mondo, with his pale face and trembling hands, I felt afraid.

  “Call your parents,” he said.

  I shook my head. “No. I know how to find Ryan,” I told him.

  He squinted at me. “You do?”

  “Yes,” I said. “Send me there, too. Do the trick with me.”

  I didn’t wait for him to argue. I stepped into the box and lowered myself inside.

  “I don’t like this,” Mondo said. “I don’t like this at all.”

  “Close the lid,” I said. “I’ll find Ryan. No problem.”

  Mondo sighed. “It’s not my day,” he murmured again.

  I settled onto my back and crossed my arms over my chest. The box smelled like pine. The velvet tickled my legs.

  “Come on! Do it!” I shouted.

  The lid slowly closed over me. I blinked in the total darkness. The air instantly became heavy and hot.

  Above me, I could hear Mondo saying the magic words. Muffled by the wooden lid, he sounded miles away.

  I waited with my eyes wide open, staring into the blackness. I realized I was holding my breath. I exhaled in a long whoosh.

  And suddenly, I felt myself start to slide.

  The bottom of the box dropped away.

  I let out a sharp cry as I slid down … down. On my back, my hands flailing in the air.

  I was on a slippery, steep slide, picking up speed. Sailing down … faster … faster … into a deep darkness.

  I screamed all the way down. My voice echoed as if I were sliding down a deep well.

  It seemed as if I slid for hours. But it was probably less than a minute.

  Where was it taking me?

  When would it end?

  My scream ended in a hiccup as I came to a stop.

  The slide let me off gently. I landed on my feet. Total blackness all around.