The Retake (Cate & Kian Book 3)

by Louise Hall

  Lola climbed up on to the daybed next to Cate and quietly watched her baby brother drink from his bottle. “He really likes his milk, doesn’t he?”

  Cate was so proud of how her daughter had adjusted to having a sibling. She wanted to be involved with everything. While Cate or Kian changed Mateo’s nappies or fed him, Lola chattered away to him, telling him stories about their friends and family.

  When Kian still didn’t look convinced, Cate said, “Liv said she’d stop by again this afternoon. I’m sure she won’t mind giving me a lift.”

  “If you’re sure you’re up to it?” Kian looked at his watch, “if we don’t leave now, we’re going to be late, Lo.”

  “OK,” Lola reluctantly climbed down from the daybed. After she’d kissed Cate and Mateo goodbye, she followed Kian to the front door.

  “You’re very lucky to have a sister who loves you so much,” Cate whispered to Mateo. He’d finished feeding so she placed the empty bottle down on the side table and positioned him with his head on her shoulder so that she could gently wind him.

  “Mummy,” Lola ran back into the porch. “Auntie Ruby’s here.”

  Remembering their conversation from the previous night, Kian looked at Cate. “Do you want me to ask her to come back later?”

  “No, it’s OK,” Cate softly rubbed her son’s back.

  After Cate had admitted to Liv on Christmas Day that she’d felt abandoned when she’d moved to Calder Harbour, Liv had made more of an effort to include Cate in her new life. Instead of awkward five-minute phone calls once a week, they now texted and Skyped each other as often as they could.

  After Cate had resolved her issues with Liv, she’d realised that she did want to get to know Ruby. It was tentative at first. Their relationship was always going to be the most complicated because they were the closest in age. It was difficult for Cate not to think that their biological father had somehow chosen Ruby over her. But they’d slowly bonded over e-mail, sharing links to their favourite nail art on Pinterest.

  The more they’d got to know each other, the more Cate had realised that it was impossible not to like Ruby. After all the drama in their family, Ruby was refreshingly uncomplicated. She was super-smart but with a childish sense of humour. When she was in her final month of pregnancy, Ruby had sent Cate care packages filled with penis-shaped cookies from Nico’s erotic bakery. “Since you’ve probably forgotten what one looks like,” she’d teased.

  Cate no longer felt threatened by their similarities; it was nice to have somebody who shared her interests in Psychology and nail art.

  She thought that they’d become friends, which was why it had hurt so much when Ruby hadn’t come with Liv to visit them after Cate had come home from the hospital with Mateo.

  “I’ll be fine,” Cate kissed her husband’s cheek. “You’d better go. I don’t want either of you to be late.”

  As she walked to the front door to wave them goodbye, she could see Ruby’s car parked just a little further up Cooper Lane.

  “Are you OK?” Cate asked, tapping on the side window.

  Ruby looked up startled as if she hadn’t expected Cate to come outside.

  “Do you want to come inside?” Cate asked. “I’ll make us some tea.”

  Ruby got out of the car, looking gorgeous and skinny in a black and white striped mini dress and black, suede over the knee boots. “Ugh,” Cate groaned, “I want to lock you up and force-feed you cake.” It was definitely one of the downsides of having a sister who looked just like you, except that she hadn’t just had a baby a couple of days ago. Ruby’s inky-black hair had been blown perfectly straight while Cate’s was piled up on top of her head in a messy bun. Cate was wearing black yoga pants and one of Kian’s white dress shirts. To complete her uber-chic look, she had a ratty towel over her shoulder which was covered in baby drool.

  Ruby threw her head back and laughed and it immediately broke the tension between them.

  When Cate started laughing too, Mateo looked up at Cate as if to say “what are you doing?”

  “It’s OK,” Cate crooned, smoothing his inky-black hair, “Mummy’s happy.”

  “I brought you these,” Ruby handed Cate a cardboard box from Nico’s bakery. When Cate opened it, there were several cookies in the shape of baby bottles with blue icing and Mateo’s name piped on them. “Do you like them?” Ruby asked, biting her lip.

  “They’re gorgeous,” Cate said, reaching across to give her half-sister a one-armed hug. “Will you thank Nico from me?”

  As they walked back across the courtyard, Ruby kept reaching out to touch Mateo and then quickly pulling her hand away.

  “Do you want to hold him?” Cate asked.

  “No,” Ruby shook her head, “I’m so clumsy, I’d probably drop him.”

  “You wouldn’t,” Cate insisted.

  In the kitchen, Ruby didn’t know where anything was kept so Cate handed her Mateo while she poured them both mugs of tea.

  She tried to settle him in the crook of her arm like she’d seen Cate do but Mateo took one look at Ruby and immediately started crying. “Cate?” Ruby panicked as he flailed about in her arms. She was certain that she was going to drop her new-born nephew on the kitchen floor.

  “Hey,” Cate chuckled, taking Mateo from Ruby. “What’s all that noise for, little man?” He stopped crying as soon as he was back with Cate.

  “I’m sorry,” Ruby took a sip of tea, “I don’t think he likes me very much.”

  “Don’t worry about it,” Cate said softly, “Lola was like that with Ben at first.”

  “It’s not just Mateo,” Ruby said glumly. “I’m rubbish with babies. Even in the supermarket, as soon as they see me, they start bawling and their mums give me evil looks. I’m like the freaking baby whisperer in reverse.”

  “It’ll be different when you have your own,” Cate looked lovingly at her baby son. “I’m sorry,” she giggled, “I just realised how patronising that sounded. I always swore I wouldn’t be one of those mums.”

  “It’s OK,” Ruby smiled weakly. “It’s just… I don’t know if I want to have children.”

  Cate gently patted her arm, “you don’t have to decide anything right away.”

  “Ugh,” Ruby groaned. “Except I kind of feel like I do. I’ve been with Nico since I was at college and everybody keeps asking when we’re going to get married and start having babies. You should have seen the look in his eyes when I told him that you’d had a boy. I think he’s starting to get broody, which is the last thing I need right now. Mum is desperate for grandchildren and because I’m her only child, there’s just so much pressure.”

  “It has to be your decision,” Cate said softly, “not your mum’s or even Nico’s. Being a parent is a huge responsibility.”

  “Besides,” Cate thought about what India had told her when she’d felt guilty about resigning from the clinic. “It’s a lot more fun drinking cava with friends than listening to Sergio on a rainy Monday morning ask for vanilla ice cream for the 16th time.”

  Ruby came upstairs with her while she put Mateo down for a nap. “I always wanted to be a Clinical Psychologist,” Cate admitted. “I think that’s one of the reasons I didn’t want to like you at first. I was jealous that you were out there fulfilling one of my dreams. I love my children fiercely but… Unlike yours, my mum was never desperate for me to give her grandchildren; she wanted me to go to university and have a fulfilling career instead.”

  “You feel like you’ve let her down?” Ruby asked.

  Cate shrugged, “a little. When I found out that you were studying to be a Clinical Psychologist, I thought that maybe Mum would see you as the daughter she should have had instead of the disappointment who got married and pregnant straight out of college.”

  “I might not know Irene very well but I’m 100% certain that she doesn’t think that,” Ruby said, giving her sister a hug. “Her eyes light up when she talks about you; she’s so proud.”

  “I’m sure your mum’s exactl
y the same.”

  “I guess what I’ve realised,” Cate said, touching her eternity ring, “is that I don’t have to apologise for any of the choices I’ve made. I’ve got the rest of my life to fulfil my dreams but my children are only going to be this young once. It’s perfectly OK if I want to take this time to just enjoy being their mum. It’s like India said, you don’t have to learn a new language in two weeks, it’s OK if it takes two years or even longer.”

  She looked at Ruby, “just like it’s OK if you don’t want children right now or maybe ever.”

  “Thanks,” Ruby shivered, “I really needed to hear that.”

  With Mateo settled in his crib and the baby monitor switched on, they went back downstairs. “Why don’t we sit outside for a minute?” Cate suggested. Although it was still early in the year, the sun was shining and it was reasonably warm. “Mm,” Ruby said, looking out at the lush, green hills at the back of the house, “I love it out here, it’s so peaceful.”

  Cate shifted, trying to get comfortable. She’d brought one of the cushions from the back porch but she was still sore between her legs. “Are you OK?” Ruby asked, “can I get you anything?”

  “I’m OK,” Cate reassured her.

  Ruby giggled, “I was convinced that when I told you I wasn’t sure if I wanted children that you’d look at me like I was bonkers or something. I mean, you only gave birth like five minutes ago.”

  “It’s your choice,” Cate winced a little, “I love my children but you know when they tell you that you forget all about the pain of childbirth when you hold your baby for the first time, it’s a total lie.”

  “Does it hurt?”

  “Like an absolute b-word.”

  “He’s adorable though,” Ruby smiled. “You and Kian make beautiful babies.”

  “We do,” Cate sighed, watching Jimmy excitedly hurdle their legs.

  Ruby’s phone rang, it was her mum. “She’s put something in the post for you, I hope that’s OK?” Ruby asked Cate after she’d hung up.

  “You’re talking again?” Cate asked.

  Ruby nodded. “After my birthday party, when I found out that Liv was my half-sister, I was so angry with them both that I refused to talk to Mum for months. Even when I found out that she’d left Dexter, I still wouldn’t take her calls but then she wrote me this really long letter. She said that Dexter had told her when they’d first started dating that he had children with his ex-partner.”

  Cate was shocked, “she knew about us?”

  Ruby nodded, “Dexter told her that your mum had done everything she could to prevent him having any contact with his children. It made her sad to think about you not having a father so she encouraged Dexter to try to contact you anyway. She only found out after you confronted him that all the birthday and Christmas cards she’d bought for him to send – the ones he’d said had been returned unopened – he’d never actually sent them.”

  “Wow,” Cate trailed her fingers through the soft grass, “he must have really hated us.”

  She turned to look at Ruby, “why were you sat in your car?”

  Ruby blushed, “I was too scared to ring the doorbell.”

  Cate decided to be honest, “it really hurt when you didn’t come with Liv to see Mateo.”

  “I wanted to,” Ruby insisted, “but I’m not like Liv, Ben or Remy, I’m just your half-sister. After Kian called to say that you’d had the baby, we all went to the hospital but the nurse said visiting was for immediate family only and I wasn’t sure if I fitted into that category or not so I stayed in the waiting room.”

  Cate felt so guilty, “you’re not just anything, Ruby. You’re part of the family. I’m so sorry.”

  “I don’t blame you,” Ruby insisted. “After what Dexter did…”

  “But none of that was your fault,” Cate said. She gave her sister a hug. “I shouldn’t have taken the issues I had with Liv and Dexter out on you. You didn’t deserve that.”

  CHAPTER 39

  “You couldn’t do me a favour, could you?” Cate asked Ruby. Liv had texted to say that she couldn’t stop by that afternoon so if Cate was going to pick Lola up from school, she was going to need to call a taxi. Unfortunately, she couldn’t pick up her cell-phone from the coffee table because the varnish on her fingernails wasn’t dry yet.

  After they’d had lunch, Ruby had offered to paint Cate’s nails. She rarely bothered painting her fingernails, focusing all her artistic efforts on her toenails instead which were only seen by her and Kian. But Ruby had brought a bottle of navy-blue polish – Cate’s favourite since it matched the Rovers home kit - and some sparkles with her.

  “Why do you need a taxi?” Ruby asked, adding a couple of sparkles to her own fingernails.

  Cate explained that she’d promised Lola that she’d pick her up from school this afternoon and she wasn’t allowed to drive yet.

  “You don’t need a taxi for that,” Ruby insisted. “I can drive you.”

  The final bell was already ringing when they parked up in the road outside Lola’s school. While Cate settled Mateo in his sling, she asked Ruby to go on ahead.

  “Ugh, would you look at that?” one of the other mums scowled when she saw Ruby walk through the school gates in her mini-dress and over the knee boots. “There’s no way she only gave birth a couple of days ago.”

  “She probably had liposuction and a boob job at the same time. I’ve heard that’s a thing now.”

  Ruby rolled her eyes. The snarky bitches probably didn’t realise that she could hear every word they were saying.

  “She’s not even brought the baby with her,” one of the other mums said.

  “It’s probably with the nanny,” the bitchy mum sniffed. “The doctors probably handed it straight to her after they’d cut it out.”

  “Has she come out yet?” Cate asked, joining Ruby. She stood up on her tiptoes to see if she could see Lola. She was completely oblivious to the bitchiness going on around her.

  “Not yet,” Ruby flashed the other mums a look to let them know that she’d heard exactly what they’d just said about her sister. At least they had the decency to look embarrassed.

  “Mummy!” Lola raced towards them, her navy-blue backpack bouncing up and down on her back.

  “Hi sweetheart,” Cate gave her a big hug. “Did you have fun at school today?”

  “Emily,” Lola called across to her best friend, “My baby brother’s here.”

  When they got home, Mateo was cranky so Cate took him upstairs. “Is there anything I can do?” Ruby offered.

  “I think I’m going to ask you to pick Lola up from school every day. The looks on those mums’ faces was absolutely priceless,” Cate giggled. “I mean, seriously, who would have liposuction and a boob job straight after giving birth?”

  Ruby frowned, “I was really hoping you hadn’t heard them.”

  Cate smiled, “I might have joked that I wanted to force-feed you cake earlier but I think there would be something seriously wrong if I looked even half as good as you do having only just had a baby. Besides, I know what they’re like. They’re always complaining about something.”

  “Although,” Cate’s eyes suddenly lit up, “it did give me an idea?”

  As Kian’s car pulled up in front of the house, Cate stood at the top of the stairs hidden from view. Ruby was sat at the dining room table playing cards with Lola. They’d dressed her up to look exactly like Cate – she was wearing Cate’s favourite navy blue and white striped top and maternity jeans and her inky-black hair was tied up in a messy bun.

  “I’m knackered,” Kian sighed, dropping his keys in the silver bowl by the front door. After a poor run of results recently, the gaffer had decided that they needed double training sessions to improve their fitness levels.

  “Hi Daddy” Lola giggled.

  “Hi sweetheart,” Kian kissed the top of his daughter’s head. “Did you have a good day at school?”

  Lola nodded, “I got 100% on my spelling test.”


  “That’s brilliant, well done,” Kian grinned. “Hey Ruby, where’s Cate?”

  Ruby frowned; he hadn’t been fooled into thinking she was Cate for even a second? “She’s upstairs.”

  When Kian walked into the bedroom, Cate was putting away laundry. “Were you testing me, angel?” He put his hands on her hips and pulled her back against him, kissing his favourite spot just below her ear. He breathed in his favourite scent of blackberries.

  “I was just curious.” Cate turned in his arms so that she was facing him. “I’m sorry. How did you know it wasn’t me? We look exactly the same.”

  Kian stripped off his t-shirt and pressed Cate’s fingertips just underneath his ribs, “I didn’t feel it here. Ruby might look like you and she might have been wearing your clothes but when I’m with you, I feel a tug right here – it’s like that book that you love so much, I feel like we’re connected somehow. From here to…” He slid his fingers up Cate’s t-shirt. She tried to wriggle away, not wanting him to feel the lingering baby weight. He pressed his fingertips in the same spot just below her ribs, “right here.”

  Cate tangled her fingers up in his black hair, bringing his head down so that she could kiss him. “Who said they weren’t good with words,” she brushed her lips over his. “That was perfect.”

  Dear Reader,

  Thank you so much for continuing on this journey with Cate and Kian.

  Although this book is fiction, some of the things that Cate struggles with in it are very personal to me. I want to dedicate ‘The Retake’ to the one person who has always supported me. Like Cate says, sometimes you can be so eager to chase after the person who left that you forget about the one who stayed. So to J, I really cannot thank you enough for always being there for me even when I’m being a “Little Miss Worry-pants” and for encouraging my love of reading.

  If you haven’t already read them, the 1st two books in the series ‘My First Half’ and ‘Two Halves’ are available now on Amazon and can be read for FREE if you’re on Kindle Unlimited.