Laguna Nights

by Kaira Rouda

  “A white wine for me,” Madison said.

  “Vodka on the rocks,” Josh said.

  As the waiter scampered away, presumably back inside, Laura appeared, wearing the same sweatshirt as Madison and cut-off jean shorts. “We’re going to need the space heaters turned on,” she said and someone on the crew uttered, “of course.”

  “Hey, so I’m sure you’re ready to get this over with. So am I, actually,” Laura said, smoothing her hair behind her ears, diamonds flashing. “It’ll be much more fun doing the Triple Play when I don’t know the cast. But it is what it is. So, Scott will be here in a minute, just a heads up.”

  Scott had been Josh’s nemesis on the spinoff show, a minor character on Laguna Nights who somehow swooped onto Hollywood Nights and stole Laura away, at least that’s what all the tabloids said. Madison wasn’t sure about how real any of it was now, but she looked at Josh and he remained calm.

  “Great. Will be good to see him,” Josh said as the waiter handed him the vodka.

  Madison was relieved it wasn’t going to be just the three of them bubbling away in the hot tub, and she had to admit the thought of Josh facing Scott like she had faced Laura was, well, sort of poetic. She had to give it to Laura.

  Tom escorted Scott out to the patio and uncomfortable introductions were made all around. Scott’s formerly thick dark hair must have departed and he was now bald, but it suited him, Madison thought. Scott’s dark brown eyes were still dreamy and overall, he could hold his own with Josh who stood next to him.

  “Hey Holly, you look amazing,” Scott said, kissing her on the cheek. “God, who knew? You were a wreck senior year. Never expected this.” He opened both hands and did a little bow. Madison felt her face flush and knew, instinctively, cameras were rolling somewhere in the bushes around them.

  Josh moved closer to her, and Madison smiled. “You look great, too, Scott. What do you do now?”

  “I own a travel business. Actually, it’s where Laura and I got the idea for the show. Folks love to travel,” Scott said as Laura walked up between him and Madison. Now who was staking her territory, Madison thought with a smile.

  “Oh, the show was your idea, too? Are you guys still together?” Madison asked, watching Laura’s face for the telltale sign of stress. Her left eye drooped. And there it went. Madison smiled.

  “No, well, we’ll see. We’re taking it day by day, we’ve been together a long time, really since Josh,” Laura said. “Let’s get in. I’m getting cold.”

  You’ve always been cold, Madison thought, watching Laura pull off her sweatshirt to reveal a replica of the red bikini from Laguna Nights. She wiggled out of her cut offs, popped her hair into a ponytail and was in the tub before the others had even undressed.

  “We’re ready for action, speed,” said the DP.

  Madison realized Laura was self-conscious, unwilling to show her body and that’s why they’d allowed her to hop into the water before the cameras rolled. She could relate, that’s how she’d lived her life on camera during Laguna Nights. But it wasn’t how she was going to live any longer.

  “Come on, Josh, it’s finally our turn,” Madison said, speaking into the camera, delivering the line she and Josh had planned. She pulled the sweatshirt over her head and pulled off her jeans, standing in a blue bikini at the edge of the pool, at the edge of the hill. She knew she looked good, she could see it in all the crew’s leering eyes. But it only mattered what one guy thought.

  “It’s always been our turn, Holly,” Josh said, moving into the frame, pulling the black T-shirt over his head and kissing her firmly on the lips, a hot, assertive kiss that they hadn’t needed to practice.

  Madison took his hand and they walked together into the water, sitting on the opposite side of the hot tub from Laura who was watching them, one eye wide, the other drooping.

  “Can I do a cannon ball?” Scott said, walking into the frame. “Hey, guys.”

  Madison and Josh smiled up at him as Laura struggled to deliver her lines. “Scott, hey, so glad you could make it to our little reunion. Scott owns a successful travel business and that’s the reason why we picked the travel theme for this episode of Reality TV Triple Play.”

  Scott walked down into the water and settled in next to Laura, wrapping an arm around her shoulder and getting her hair wet. Laura couldn’t hide her annoyance, Madison realized with a smile.

  Laura continued, “Thanks again for tuning in. Join us next week as we turn reality upside down for the former cast of Real Life. I’m Laura Kinkaid. Keep it real.”

  “And cut,” said the DP.

  Laura stood up and hurried to the steps. “I need a towel,” she said, as someone appeared and handed her one. Madison sat with Josh in the hot tub and watched Laura deep in conversation with Roger, Marty, Tom and the rest of the producers.

  “She doesn’t seem pleased,” Josh said, leaning close.

  “No talking,” Madison whispered.

  “So, you two are a thing?” Scott said, crossing the tub and standing in front of them.

  Josh and Madison shrugged, simultaneously.

  “Oh, right, the cameras. Always recording, aren’t they?” Scott said, looking vaguely around the terrace. “Well, you should have remembered that earlier. I’m going to try to get her to cut most of the embarrassing stuff on you guys. I mean, the fans are cheering you on. You’re blowing up online.”

  When neither of them spoke, he said, “There are whole websites devoted to you two, old photos, clips from the show, fans betting you’ll be back together. There’s even a bunch of memes about you and your hot body, Holls. I have to admit, you’re smoking. If I had realized that in high school, I would’ve gone after you instead of her.” Scott nodded Laura’s way. “Nah, just kidding. I like living in her limelight. Well, I think we’re a wrap. See you guys around. Maybe next reunion?”

  Scott headed to the steps and a crew member handed him a towel and he walked away, joining Laura’s group in the corner of the terrace. Madison and Josh followed him out of the water, Madison quickly pulled on her sweatshirt and Josh slipped on his T-shirt. The night was getting chilly.

  “We’re a wrap. Thanks for showing up tonight. You should expect the episode to air four to six months from now. We’ll keep you in the loop. There’s a car waiting out front,” Tom said. “Keep it real, you two.”

  “Whatever,” Josh said, shaking the date producer’s hand for the last time.

  “Come on,” Madison said and she led the way around the outside of Laura’s family’s house.

  Six Months Later

  “It’s recycling day,” Francine said as he walked past her in the kitchen.

  “I know,” Josh said, settling his plate in the sink before reaching for the recycling trash under the sink. “I’m on it.”

  “Good. Madison has been so busy at work, she leaves before I can remind her,” Francine said, turning the page of the morning newspaper roughly.

  “Are you worried about something?” Josh said, holding the trashcan but focusing on her.

  “What if we all look horrible on this thing? What if everyone in town makes fun of us?” she said, her hand, veined and ghostly white, covering her mouth. Josh could never get used to her frailty.

  “So what? We’ve all handled worse in our lives, right? And what did you tell me? We laugh all the way to the bank, that’s what we do,” Josh said, patting Francine on the shoulder.

  “You’re right, of course,” Francine said. “I just thought I’d be dead before this ever came on the air.”

  Josh smiled at Francine’s dark humor and walked outside. It was another beautiful day in paradise. Since he’d started working with his dad, learning about his investment portfolio, he’d been the happiest at work that he’d ever been. As his father had predicted, Josh did have a quick mind for math and he was a focused learner. He was even considering going back to business school at his dad’s urging. But for now, what he didn’t have in formal schooling, he more than made up for with ch
arisma. Not only his father, but even his brother seemed to be coming around. The whole clan was talking about spending Thanksgiving together, a first since Josh graduated high school.

  Josh dumped the recycling into the large green bin and pushed it to the curb. As he was finishing, Madison pulled into the driveway. He smiled and pulled her door open, giving her a hand as she stepped out of the car. Even though she wasn’t showing too much yet, he’d felt extra protective of her, and their unborn child. He still couldn’t believe they were going to be parents, that they were building a future together. It was his fault he’d forgotten to wear a condom, something he’d never done before. Once they’d both gotten over the shock, they’d decided together that it was meant to be, with Madison blaming herself as much as Josh for the lack of protection.

  “Hey honey, anything wrong,” Josh said as they embraced on the driveway.

  “Forgot my darn power point clicker,” she said. “I swear, this baby is sucking up all of my brain power.”

  “That’s good. Smart babies are the best,” Josh said.

  “But what about smart fiancés? I mean, this critter may leave me mindless by the time he or she arrives,” Madison said as they walked toward the cottage.

  “You’d just have to stay home, be my sex slave,” Josh said, pulling her close.

  “You couldn’t handle it,” Madison teased.

  Josh looked into her eyes, and said, “I can handle anything as long as you’re by my side.”

  “Me, too,” Madison said, her eyes clouding with worry. “Hopefully, even this stupid show premiering tonight. They’ve aired enough promos for it the whole country will probably tune in.”

  “Even that. Hey, wait here, I’ll get your clicker,” Josh said, racing up the steps, two at a time. He returned a moment later with the clicker, retrieving it from the kitchen counter. Madison had practiced her speech repeatedly in front of him and Francine. The presentation was perfect. “Here you go! Good luck again. And we’ll have fun with this thing – whatever it is – tonight.”

  Madison left work early, thrilled to have landed the huge group for next year due to her perfect presentation. She was exhausted, but that was nothing new. Since almost the moment she had discovered she was pregnant – a certain love-making session on a hotel tabletop the likely culprit – she’d been tired. And elated. She’d dreamed of having a child, but never thought the dream would come true. And with Josh? They’d been inseparable since leaving the hot tub scene, and everything had fallen into place, almost as if it were destiny.

  Since Josh had moved in a few months ago, she hadn’t had to worry as much about her mom. Josh’s office was nearby, his hours flexible thanks to his dad, and he regularly helped out with Francine, bringing her mom lunch, and sometimes even sitting with her when she had the energy to paint. Madison had more time to focus on her job and on taking care of herself. Josh had insisted. And on the nights and weekends when she did have to work late, Josh would make sure a healthy meal was served to her mom and was waiting for Madison when she returned home. And the best part, he seemed to enjoy working for his dad. That was another huge blessing.

  As she pulled into the driveway, the cottage glowed with warmth. She was relieved they’d declined repeated invitations to appear on the red carpet for the premiere of the pilot of Reality TV Triple Play, “reality to the third degree”. Even though so much had changed since they had filmed the show, she didn’t want any more exposure on a red carpet or otherwise. The sooner this episode aired, the better.

  But still, so much good had come out of the experience for her and Josh that she knew they could withstand the firestorm of bad social media that was sure to follow, as long as they stood together. The show was the reason they had found each other again, she kept reminding herself. As Scott had told them that night, social media had been on their side so far. But who knows what viewers would believe once the show aired. She had learned fame isn’t just fleeting, it’s fickle, too.

  Madison knew one thing as well as she knew Laura: Whatever Laura was releasing tonight would make Laura out to be the beautiful hero, and would make Madison look fill in the blank with a negative term: Stupid, sad, needy, depressed, ugly, less. It was a guarantee. But this time, none of those things were true. This time, she had Josh by her side and her life on track. This time, the stigma of reality TV wouldn’t haunt her. She’d embrace what she liked and ignore the rest, for herself and for her baby. The money so far was enough to pay for their child’s college fund. And this time, they’d receive residuals if the series went into syndication. All was good, she reminded herself as she closed the garage door. Josh was waiting on the steps to the garage.

  “It’s almost show time. I’ve got popcorn popped, a fire in the fireplace, your mom propped up in her favorite chair, so what can I get you?” he said.

  “I have all I need,” Madison said as they shared a tender kiss and headed inside. “We’ve got this, right?”

  “We do,” Josh said.

  They sat side by side on the couch and Josh turned on the flat screen TV above the fireplace. The show opener rolled and Madison took a deep breath, trying to push down the panic that had invaded her like an alien. Her pulse was racing.

  “Hey, we’re ok, look at me,” Josh said, pulling her against him, cradling her face in his hands. “We’re taping it. We can watch it later.”

  “No,” she said, pushing down the sick feeling in her stomach. “I’m fine.”

  Laura appeared onscreen, standing on the edge of the hillside near her parents’ home. “I’m Laura Kinkaid. Welcome to Reality TV Triple Play. Each week, we’ll reunite popular cast members from some of your favorite reality TV shows. They’ll think they’re being cast in a pilot of a new show, but you’ll know it’s a Triple Play. It’s reality to the third degree. We’ll get started, after this.”

  Laura’s face disappeared and commercials followed.

  “Not bad so far,” Francine said from her chair. “Good popcorn, ego maniac.”

  “Thanks, Francine,” Josh said, smiling at her. Madison felt his arm around her shoulder, holding her tight. “Here we go, ladies.”

  The show began again with a wide-angle shot of the Mondrian Resort grounds, swimming pool and the glistening ocean beyond. Laura’s voiceover began: “Remember this beach town? It’s Laguna Beach, California, in the OC. The former cast members of my reality TV show Laguna Nights have been told that bad boy Josh Welsh is getting a second chance at an acting career, staring in his own travel show, Josh’s Journeys. Here we are at the most famous resort in Laguna Beach. It’s Josh’s day to shoot, but he’s got stage fright too severe to go on camera. So, his old girlfriend Holly takes over. You remember poor Holly, right? Josh dumped her for me our senior year in high school. But she’s turned out just fine.”

  The camera cuts to Madison, standing by the fire pit, smiling. She looked pretty good, she thought, relieved. She’d been certain Laura would edit in her most unflattering takes.

  “You look gorgeous,” Josh said. Madison searched his face quickly for signs of anger at the jabs Laura had taken already, but he remained outwardly calm.

  As she looked back at the television, the camera locked on Madison’s face, confident and glowing. “Welcome to my favorite resort. No trip to Laguna Beach is complete without a stay here. We never got to film here when we were taping the show so this is a special treat. These days, I spend as much time here as I can.” Because I work here, Madison had said, but they’d edited that out.

  Laura’s voiceover cut in. “Holly didn’t want anything to do with this show, and we even had to force her to be a part of it. Her mom helped us, too.”

  The show cut to Francine, sitting in the chair in the cottage, where she sat now. “Holly is a natural, I tell you. Everyone said it. I felt like if that ego monster, cheating ex-boyfriend of hers could do another show, well then, Holly should, too.”

  Voiceover, while Francine smiles smugly on camera. “We agree, Mrs. Alcott.”

>   “I look ghastly,” Francine said, as Josh and Madison stared at her, shaking with anger.

  “Mom, how could you?” Madison said and her mom just shrugged and Madison turned back to the television.

  Laura’s face came on screen. She was sitting at the table at the Mondrian Resort’s oceanfront restaurant, the same place where Madison and Josh met for coffee on the first day they saw each other. “You know, on reality TV, we like to use hidden microphones in unusual places. Like here.” Laura pointed to a tiny gap in the wood railing and the camera angle switched to that camera’s view. Eye level and intimate. “I wonder what Holly had to say to Josh about his lack of, well, performance?”

  Cut to a tight shot of Madison and Josh sitting at breakfast. Josh’s face is pale and sweaty on screen. Madison turned to look at him next to her on the couch and squeezed his hand, but he was staring at the screen. Onscreen the waiter has delivered their meal.

  “Maybe it was hypoglycemia or something? Low blood sugar?” she said to him across the table. The camera catches Josh swallowing hard, wiping his brow.

  “I wouldn’t get stage fright after all these years, right?” Josh said, and takes a deep breath.

  “No, of course you wouldn’t,” Madison said. She had to admit she looked good, especially compared to pasty Josh. “But I’m sorry you won’t be in my segment with me. I really went out on a limb today. I hope I didn’t make a fool of myself, like before.”

  “You were perfect. I think you’re going to have a lot more segments where that came from. Roger was enthralled with you. I could tell, even through my low blood sugar thing,” Josh said.

  The camera panned back and Laura’s voiceover began again. “I wonder if it was low blood sugar or just a guilty conscience? We all remember how he messed around with a certain someone when he had told Holly he loved her. And now, he deserts her during her cameo on his own show. Hmm. Is there anything redeeming about Josh Welsh? Keep watching.”