Chasing the Renegade

by Bonnie R. Paulson

  “I have nothing here, Jasper. There’s nothing here for me. I don’t want to be stuck where I can’t progress. I can’t end up like my mom and the other Smythe women here in town.” She leaned back on the cushion and stared at the ice floating in the glasses she’d brought over.

  Jasper pressed his hand to his chest. “There’s nothing in Seattle for you. I’m here. I’m here and you want to leave.” He studied her, and suddenly couldn’t imagine his life without her. The realization scared him. When had he left his plans for short-term? Had he abandoned them or had he just gotten caught up in the security of long-term?

  Treya shifted on the futon to face him more fully. She jutted her jaw to the side and narrowed her eyes. “Yeah, let’s talk about that. Why are you still here? You have no ties to this place. You can leave whenever you want. You said you’re down from Alaska. Don’t you plan on going back? Are you just traveling? Why don’t you go with me to Seattle? We could go together. It would be fun.” She pleaded with him with her blue eyes, staring at him as if she could get what she wanted, if she just hoped hard enough.

  How did he tell her that he wasn’t from Alaska? He wasn’t interested in going anywhere else. He just wanted to enjoy his hometown and have her by his side. How did he tell her he was one of the hated Baileys? Jasper swallowed past the tightness in his throat. He studied her in the light from the TV and the small lightbulb glowing from the back bedroom.

  After a minute of silence, he shook his head and reached out, touching the back of her hand with his fingertips. “I’m not looking for a big city like Seattle. I want a steadfast town where everyone knows each other.” He glanced down and then raised his eyes. She couldn’t understand unless she knew everything. She had to know who he was and what he was in Bailey for. “Treya, I need to tell you something.” Right then was the perfect time. He just had to get the words past his lips. He just had to tell her what he’d held back all that time.

  She took a deep breath, sighing as she pulled away from his touch. “Look, I don’t want to get into this. Nothing is set in stone.” She waved her hand in the general direction of the kitchen and laptop. “I’m just looking at this point. I’ve been looking at things in Missoula, Portland, and Spokane. Just because I’m looking doesn’t mean I’m brave enough to go.” She laughed, the sound self-deprecating and a little lost. “It’s just a dream. It doesn’t mean it’s anything to get upset about.” She pasted a bright smile on and reached for the DVD remote. “Let’s watch the rest of the movie.”

  Jasper nodded slowly and turned back to face the screen. He didn’t move his arm back into place around her, though, and she didn’t cuddle up against his side.

  Why put forth the effort to fall further for each other when one of them wanted to leave? Jasper had a distinct impression that he wasn’t enough for Treya and that stung his pride more than he wanted to admit. What did he do when the woman he cared for didn’t feel the same way?

  He pulled back and returned to his original plan. Short-term. He was a Bailey. The sharp pain in his chest was just a sample of the pain he would have, if he grew attached to Treya and she one day died or abandoned him. She had all the makings of a Bailey wife – desire to leave the small town being an important trait. Nothing good ever came out of being a Bailey man. If he protected his heart, he wouldn’t lose anything important.

  Jasper had to remind himself of that. Short-term was the safest way to play.

  Judging by Treya’s withdrawal, she felt the same way.

  Chapter 14

  Treya

  Leaving work the next day, Treya pulled her bag higher up her shoulder. The afternoon seemed to understand her mood with its low hanging clouds and sporadic gusts of wind which blew the rain around like cold tears.

  After Jasper left a few nights before, she’d been confused and upset. She hadn’t slept well since, but she wasn’t sure what to do. She didn’t think she’d done anything wrong, but she couldn’t help feeling like they were fighting.

  The fact that she hadn’t heard from him in over three days didn’t help her feel like things were fine. Maybe Seattle was a better idea than she’d originally thought. She didn’t want to feel like this with an ache in her chest and a constant worry that he would call and she’d miss it. Her poor cell phone had only ever been a convenience before and now she checked it constantly in case she might miss a call or a text.

  None of which came.

  She paused outside the clinic doors, staring up at the sky as if waiting for a break in weather that was never going to come. Treya had parked her car in the lot around the side of the building and there wasn’t any protecting from the rain that way.

  If she wanted to get there without getting too wet, she’d have to pause in the overhang outside the florist shop. She could make it. She pulled her bag close to her side and then dashed to the next business over. Under the dark brown awning, Treya wiped at her forehead. It wasn’t going to be easy to avoid getting too wet. She’d have to run to the parking lot and put her keys in the door, unlock it and then climb in. That gave a lot of opportunity for the rain to pour down around her.

  The door opened, pulling Treya’s gaze. She stepped to the side, surprised to find Jasper standing in front of her. She glanced toward the flower shop and then raised her gaze to his face. “Hi.” She didn’t know what else to say. Did she have the right to ask where he’d been? Why he hadn’t called? Did she have the right to even expect anything from him? They hadn’t given parameters to their relationship and Treya walked new ground with Jasper every time they’d been together.

  She didn’t date, being a Smythe in Bailey.

  He stepped out of the doorway and moved closer to her, a dark black slicker hanging from his shoulders. “Hi.” His green eyes searched her beneath the wide black brim of a Stetson that looked fairly new.

  Something she should have asked him about before was the fact that he seemed to have plenty of money and no job. For some reason that suddenly struck Treya as important. She realized she didn’t know much about him for being so attached. She didn’t even know his last name. She’d kissed him, but she had no idea who he really was.

  “Sir, here’s your bouquet.” A woman offered a well-wrapped bouquet of red roses and white lilies out the door to Jasper who nodded when he took them. The woman ducked back inside the shop, leaving Jasper to turn back to Treya.

  “I was going to bring these over to you. I’ve missed you.” He held the flowers out, his simple statement messing with Treya’s heart.

  If he’d missed her so much, why hadn’t he called? What was the purpose in ignoring her? Although, to be fair, Treya hadn’t made any effort either. She slowly reached out, studying the green cellophane wrapper which set off the lines of the rich flowers and added to the depth of the floral piece.

  “Thank you. I’ve missed you, too.” That wasn’t all Treya wanted to say, but she held her tongue. Why would she tell him how much she missed him when admitting her feelings for him would only end in more pain? He wasn’t as attached to her as she was to him.

  They searched each other’s eyes, as if the silence between them would help them devise the whys and wheres they were supposed to go next.

  A man suddenly stepped under the awning behind Treya, glancing at Jasper as he walked past to get inside the shop. The man stopped, reaching out a hand and placing his fingers on Jasper’s upper arm. “Jasper? Hey, it is you. Wow, it’s been forever.” He shoved his hand into the space between them.

  Jasper shifted his attention from Treya to the man, seeming a little dazed as he shook the extended hand. After a moment recognition dawned and a slow smile spready across his masculine lips. “Douglas Shipring. Wow, it’s been a long time.”

  If Jasper was from Alaska, how did he know the man? More questions than answers bombarded Treya with doubt. She smiled politely in case the man looked her way, but he didn’t acknowledge her presence as he steadily pumped Jasper’s arm and talked fast.

  “I couldn’t believ
e it when I heard your brother got married. He always swore he’d never marry. And to Abby Smythe.” Douglas shook his head, finally releasing Jasper’s hand. He wore a straw cowboy hat over a pair of worn overalls and a rain-splattered flannel.

  Treya blinked as his words sank in. Jasper’s brother hadn’t married Abby Smythe. Titus Bailey had married Treya’s cousin. But then everything clicked.

  Jasper had been in town for the wedding. Abby had said once that Titus had a brother who moved away from town. Jasper seemed to always have money and a place to stay. He’d picked the creek for their first date. He had the same coloring as half the town – which was not exaggerating. He’d never told her his last name. There had been no hesitancy as he’d agreed to secretly dating Treya.

  The fact that he expected her to behave loosely on their first date made sense. The Bailey men always treated the Smythe women like they had no value except as a short-term fling.

  Betrayal sliced through Treya like a whip cutting through the air. She stepped back, her shoulders drawing together behind her as she straightened her spine and lifted her chin. He’d made a fool of her. How many times had he gone back to Bailey Ranch and made fun of her? No wonder he’d tried to talk her out of going… anywhere. He was from Bailey, not Alaska.

  Treya blinked at the molten heat pricking behind her eyelids. She couldn’t cry. She wouldn’t cry. Not in front of Jasper. Not in front of anyone.

  Jasper glanced her way, worry pulling his eyebrows together. He smiled politely at Douglas but it wasn’t enough. Treya pushed past them, ducking out into the rain without a second thought. She didn’t care how wet she got. None of it mattered.

  Rushing around the corner, she pulled out her keys and stopped beside the driver’s side of her car. She put the key in the lock and turned it. Reaching out, she pulled on the handle of the door but nothing happened.

  She turned the key the other way and heard the distinct lock clicking up. Pulling the door open, she tossed her bag inside and moved to step into the car, out of the rain.

  But Jasper pushed the door shut, blocking her from doing anything with an arm extended in front of her. As if sensing the turmoil inside Treya, the clouds opened up further, dumping water in sheets all around them.

  Treya jerked her gaze to Jasper’s face. She ignored the rain drenching her, soaking her skin and her clothing. If nothing else, the cold water streaming down her face mingled with and hid the hot tears flowing from her eyes.

  “You’re a Bailey.” She didn’t need to say more. She could see it in the remorse on his face and the pleading in his eyes. She shook her head, folding her arms across her chest as she looked away from him. She couldn’t speak any more. A Bailey. What more was there to say?

  “Yes.” His one-word answer flipped a switch inside Treya.

  Her hurt and embarrassment turned to anger. She jutted her chin to the side and snapped her gaze back to his face. “Are you serious? You’ve been playing with me. What, do you go back to your Bailey clan and laugh at the stupid Smythe girl? Do you have bets going with everyone on how long it will take to take advantage of me? Or is it worse than that. Do you have bets on how long it will take to make me fall in love with you?”

  Jasper didn’t say anything, he just watched her from beneath the safety of his hat, regret in the hard line of his lips.

  Treya took a deep breath, suddenly chilled through to the bone and it had nothing to do with the weather. How stupid did she have to be?

  Chapter 15

  Jasper

  Jasper clenched his fists at his sides. What had he been thinking? There was no way Treya would believe him, let alone forgive him. He needed to keep his mouth shut and let her vent. Arguing with her about the details wouldn’t get him anything.

  She blinked at him and folded her arms, suddenly looking smaller and more vulnerable than he’d ever seen her before. She looked up at him, her blue eyes red-rimmed. “Why didn’t you tell me?” Her voice cracked as her lower lip quivered.

  “I didn’t know how.” He wanted to pull off his slicker and wrap it around her petite shoulders to stave off the cold of the rainstorm. She just stood there in her blue scrubs as if the thin material could protect her from the chill.

  “Really? You’re going to go with that?” Treya’s eyes blazed as she stared at him. “You expect me to believe you couldn’t figure out a way to say by the way, I’m a Bailey?” She shook her head. “It’s pretty easy. Not to mention you could have led with that.”

  “And open myself up to degrading comments and the backlash associated with being a Bailey? They made a mistake and sat me on the Smythe side. Rather than make a scene, I went with it. I haven’t been here in six years. I forgot how embroiled everyone is in this stupid feud.” He shook his head and continued, knowing deep down it wasn’t helping the situation but unwilling to let her go without hearing his side. “I really didn’t know how after a certain amount of time had passed. I didn’t want anything long term before that, so it wasn’t worth ruining everything just to tell you my last name.”

  Treya reared back at the mention of not wanting anything long term. She narrowed her eyes. “You mean, you really were planning on something like a fling?” She stepped closer to him, holding her gaze on him as she studied his face. “I was trying so hard to figure out a way to make you take me with you.”

  “I’m not the only one at fault here. Can you deny that I presented an easy ticket out of the small-town nightmare you’ve been trying to escape? Is it fair to assume that you would do anything to get out of here? Even date someone you know is leaving?” Jasper couldn’t stop himself. The words tumbled out like jagged black obsidian, cutting and crushing as they went.

  Her anger faded to regret and Treya reached out, opening the door of her car. She dropped her gaze and avoided looking at him. “You’re right. We’re both wrong. Let’s just leave it at that.”

  Jasper reached out and placed his hand on her fingers curled over the edge of her now-open door. “Treya, I didn’t… I didn’t expect things to be like this.” He couldn’t believe he’d fallen for a Smythe woman when he knew better. He’d fallen for her and he just needed her to forgive him of the things he’d done. She could forgive him. He had to believe she could.

  Treya didn’t look at him, as she slowly removed her fingers from under his hold. She glanced up toward the sky, the rain soaking her hair and running down her skin. “Goodbye, Jasper.” She blinked and didn’t look at him again. Sinking into the driver’s seat of her car, she pulled the door shut. The engine turned over and then in moments she was gone.

  The bouquet of flowers sat on the ground beside where her car had been. Mud had splattered on the green wrappings, darkening the white lilies with brown water and turning the red roses a dark maroon.

  Jasper stood there a long time as he stared after her. How had he just lost the most important fight of his life? Treya drove away with his heart and he had nothing left.

  He made it back to the Bailey Ranch after driving by Treya’s apartment complex – twice – to catch sight of her. Her car wasn’t in her parking spot and Jasper didn’t feel like having the cops called on him.

  At the ranch, he climbed out of his rig and strode into the house. He’d finalized some things on a piece of property and home the day before and staying at the ranch just made him feel more like an interloper than anything else.

  He needed to move on, he just wasn’t sure how.

  ~~~

  Two days later Jasper found himself sitting forlornly at the counter space of the kitchen. He’d peeled an apple of all its skin in one fell piece, leaving the curled mass in a similar shape to how it had been minus its creamy insides. That’s how he felt. Hollow and sliced up.

  He couldn’t stop thinking about Treya. She’d been so hurt and he’d done that. Jasper couldn’t erase the image of her pain from his mind.

  “I think it’s something to consider. If she doesn’t keep her apartment, we could consider remodeling everything and turnin
g the apartment complex into a condominium complex.” Titus followed Abby into the kitchen, engrossed in their conversation. He glanced at his brother, but continued the conversation with his wife.

  She turned, placing a hand on the counter. “Look, I know that makes sense from a business aspect, but it doesn’t work on a humanitarian level. If you let anyone know that you own that apartment building, that will be the last place Smythes have to live until they decide what they’re doing with their lives. If you take Treya’s apartment and mine and turn them into expensive condos, the Smythes will have to leave and that will take away our chance at fixing this town.”

  Treya’s apartment? Jasper sat up, narrowing his eyes as he tried to focus. No sleep two nights in a row made it hard to do much of anything. “Treya gave up her apartment?” Could she do that in just two days?

  Titus furrowed his brow at Jasper at the easy use of Treya’s name. “How do you know Treya?”

  Abby turned, considering him and then the truth cleared up her confusion as she put the pieces together. “You’re the guy?”

  Jasper blinked. “I think it depends on what guy you’re talking about.” He knew Abby wasn’t stupid, but she was a Smythe before she was a Bailey. How much would she blame him? Would she demand Titus kick him out of the house?

  “The guy that Treya fell for and then had to leave because her heart was so crushed. That guy.” Abby shifted her weight onto one foot, leaning her hip to the side as she folded her arms. “Tell me the truth, Jasper. Is that you?”

  Fell for him? Had Treya really fallen for him? “What do you mean the guy that Treya fell for? And she left?” Where would she go in only two days? She had a responsibility to her job. She couldn’t just leave town. Jasper had taken a lot for granted and he’d assumed she just needed time to cool off. He hadn’t actually considered the possibility that she would leave.