The G.I. Bride

by Eileen Ramsay

  ‘But you told me?’

  ‘He told me you were a nurse. And someone very special to him. He also said he wanted you to know the truth if you asked.’

  *

  Outside, April didn’t notice where she was going. Her mind was full of Theo. What on earth should she do? If his time was limited, maybe she should come back. Surely it was a small thing, to make him happy in his last months. How could she selfishly go back to Cornwall, to Crawford, when she knew that Theo could die at any moment, longing for her? Asking for her.

  She thought of Crawford: his beautiful face, those green, green eyes. The way he held her so sweetly. And most of all those kisses. His strong arms around her, his eyes smiling into hers. Oh God! How could she give up the promise of happiness with him? But she must. What sort of person was she that she couldn’t provide comfort to the man who’d first captured her young heart? Spotting a bench, she sat down, hugging herself and looking out at the grey, choppy water of the Thames. It was an impossible choice. Her conscience told her she should be with Theo, but her heart didn’t agree. It didn’t matter that she’d only known Crawford for a few weeks. It didn’t matter that his home was thousands of miles away. She would do anything, overcome anything, if only she could be with him. Because, she realised, as she gazed sightlessly at a boat chugging down the river, her heart belonged to Crawford in a way it never had to Theo.

  *

  She was cold and dejected by the time she returned to the Osbornes. They were both sitting in the kitchen drinking tea.

  Mrs Osborne poured another cup for her. ‘Thank you, my dear, for coming to see Theo and comforting him. He told us that you talked about returning to London once you were qualified.’

  ‘Did he?’

  ‘It would mean so much to him. And I know it would help him recover more than anything else.’

  ‘Well, no decision was made. My life is in Cornwall right now, and I can’t leave it for a while.’

  ‘You know there’ll always be a home here for you, if you do return.’ Reverend Osborne smiled kindly at her.

  April smiled vaguely back. ‘Thank you. If you don’t mind, I’m going to go to my room. I have much to think about and need a bit of time.’

  ‘Of course. Supper will be at seven.’

  April threw herself down on the bed. The thought of living here and looking after Theo filled her with dread. Even if it was for just a few months, she couldn’t do it. She loved Theo like a brother, no more than that. And she just couldn’t give up her chance of happiness. Because if she left Cornwall, she doubted she’d ever see Crawford again. She’d be betraying him and betraying herself. And she wouldn’t do it. The Osbornes expected too much from her.

  By the time she came down to supper, April had decided she must harden her heart. So she mentioned nothing of her thoughts, and the Osbornes didn’t ask. They seemed to have accepted that she would be going back to Cornwall for now, and they left it at that.

  ‘We’ll be leaving at two again tomorrow. You will be coming, won’t you, April?’

  ‘Of course I will. But I’m afraid my train leaves the day after, first thing in the morning. I was given only four days leave so I need to get back.’

  ‘So soon? Surely they’d understand if you send a telegram saying you need to stay.’ Mrs Osborne’s expression was distressed.

  ‘They’re terribly short-staffed. So many nurses have left to join the military. I’m needed, and I won’t let them down. I’m sorry.’

  ‘Of course you mustn’t, my dear, although we shall be sorry to see you go,’ the reverend said.

  ‘Thank you. I will be sorry to leave.’ It was a small lie and April hoped it didn’t give them too much hope. It at least meant that she could escape without causing too much agitation.

  *

  The next day at two, they all left for the hospital, and the Osbornes again left April to visit Theo on her own. He was subdued when she arrived beside his bed. She kissed his cheek and sat down beside him, taking his hand.

  ‘How are you today, Theo?’

  ‘Feeling a bit ropey, to be honest. But better now that you’re here.’

  ‘Good, I’m glad I’ve helped. But you must know, this will be my last visit for a while as I have to go back tomorrow.’

  ‘Must you, April?’

  ‘You know I must. But I’ll write, like I promised I would. Every day if that helps.’

  He sighed. ‘It will have to do for now. But tell me about Cornwall. Tell me about your friends.’

  So she did, careful to not mention Crawford. But at talk of the dance at the base, his hand tightened on hers.

  ‘Is that why you have to get back? You met some American soldier at the dance?’

  ‘Of course I didn’t.’ Well, she hadn’t met Crawford at the dance, so it wasn’t a complete lie.

  ‘You would tell me, April, wouldn’t you? If you had somebody else?’

  ‘How would that help you, Theo?’

  He didn’t say anything for a moment. Just lay with his hand holding tightly to hers. Then, quietly, he said, ‘I’ve known you many years. Loved you for a fair few of those. I know we had that difficult time when I behaved like a cad. And I know you, April. And I think I know when you’re lying. If there’s someone else, someone with a future who you can love, then you mustn’t let me hold you back. I was selfish yesterday, and I’m sorry. But I thought a lot last night, and I realised that if I really do love you, then I would want you to be happy. And how can you be happy looking after a husk of a man like me? Sister said she’d told you the truth, so you know there’s no future for us, my darling. And more than anything you deserve a future, a family of your own to love. Something you’ve never had. Now, promise me something, April. Go back to Cornwall and be happy. Forget about me, my chance has gone, and I will be content knowing that you have a second chance at love. And I will always remember you in the park sitting amongst the bluebells – the exact colour of your eyes – with your hair gleaming golden in the sun. Do you remember that day, my love?’

  At his words, April couldn’t stop the tears falling. Her heart was squeezing with love and sadness. In that moment, he was the boy she remembered. The little boy with the big heart who’d carried her through her grief. The only person who had changed was her.

  ‘Of course I remember. You picked a bunch for me and pinned one over your heart.’

  He smiled his lopsided smile. ‘And that’s where you will remain. Now, I want you to go.’

  ‘You will always be in my heart too. My first love, I will never forget.’ April was crying openly now. She leaned over and kissed his scarred cheek, her tears falling on his face.

  ‘Don’t cry. Your life lies before you, and when my time comes, I will watch over you always.’

  She lay her head on his chest, weeping while he stroked her hair.

  Finally, he pushed her up gently. ‘Go now, April. There’s only so much selflessness a man can take.’

  She nodded. ‘Goodbye, my dearest friend.’

  Their hands remained joined as she rose. Slowly, she pulled away from him until just the tips of their fingers were touching. She looked at him for what she knew would be the last time, then turned and hurried out of the ward. The Osbornes called to her as she passed, but she couldn’t speak. Instead she ran, tears clouding her vision, before she finally collapsed on a bench outside the hospital and wept as if her heart would break.

  *

  That night, she did not go down to supper. Instead, she lay on the bed, staring at the ceiling, keeping her mind blank. It was the only way she could hold herself together. Finally, she heard a gentle knock on the door, and Reverend Osborne came in.

  ‘I just wanted to say goodbye in case I didn’t see you tomorrow. And to say thank you for coming. I know it’s not been easy, but Theo has appreciated it so much.’

  She didn’t deserve their gratitude, and that thought proved too much for her and once again she burst into tears. The reverend sat on the bed beside he
r and took her hand in his.

  ‘April, listen to me. I know there is not much more that can be done for Theo.’

  She nodded.

  ‘But I can’t bring myself to break the news to his mother. She needs to have some hope to hang on to.’

  ‘How can you be so calm about it?’

  ‘It is God’s will, my child. And though my heart is breaking, still I must celebrate the years we had with him. He was a gift to us and will always be. I must take comfort in that.’

  ‘Oh, reverend, I am so sorry I could not be the woman he wanted.’

  ‘Now that’s silly talk. How could we expect you to give up your life, which is just beginning, to care for him? Dry your eyes and look to the future. Make it a good one, one Theo would be proud of.’

  April nodded. ‘I’ll try. And thank you for being so wonderful. Will you let me know . . . will you let me know if anything happens?’

  ‘I will let you know, child. Have a safe journey. I’ll be praying for you every day.’

  Chapter 29

  April was up early the following morning, and Mrs Osborne was still in bed. Leaving a note of thanks and love for her, she left the house with a heavy heart and made her way to Paddington. She would not reach Truro until later that night, but she didn’t mind. She needed the journey to think and as the train made it’s slow, stop-start way to Cornwall, she barely noticed the hours passing.

  When she finally arrived she walked home, still in a daze. Letting herself in, she realised that Mrs Teague would not have known when she was coming back, but even so, the woman was sitting by the fire, wearing her dressing gown. She jumped up with a glad cry when she saw her.

  ‘April, my love. You look all in. Sit down and I’ll get you some food and tea.’

  April gratefully dropped on to the sofa, staring into the flames.

  Mrs Teague returned with a plate of sandwiches and a pot of tea. ‘Was it very bad, lovely?’ she asked sympathetically.

  April nodded. ‘I won’t see him again. His injuries are too bad.’

  ‘I’m sorry to hear that. Is there no hope at all?’

  ‘None. I’m sorry, Mrs Teague, I find I can’t eat these sandwiches. Will they keep for tomorrow? I think I need to go to bed.’

  ‘Before you go, there’s something I need to . . .’

  April looked at her expectantly. But then Mrs Teague shook her head, looking uncomfortable.

  ‘Never mind. It can wait. You go on up. I’ll have these for my lunch tomorrow.’ She kissed her goodnight and left her to go to her room, where, much to her surprise, April slept deeply, waking only when her landlady came in with a cup of tea.

  ‘Time to get up, lovely. You need to be at the hospital soon.’ She sat on the bed beside her and stroked the hair from her face. ‘Are you all right for work today?’

  April sat up. ‘Yes. I need it. It will take my mind off the last few days. And when I get back you can tell me what’s been going on while I’ve been away.’

  The older woman’s eyes flickered briefly and she looked away. ‘There’s not a lot to say.’

  April was surprised at her subdued response. It wasn’t like her. But then, maybe, she felt it was inappropriate to chatter about everyday life when she’d been with her dying friend. She let the matter drop and hurried to get ready.

  *

  Sister Mulholland welcomed April warmly when she walked into the ward. ‘Ah, Nurse Harvey. We’ve missed you. I hope all’s well with your friend?’

  ‘Not really, sister. But work will help. Where shall I start?’

  The day was busy as she tended to the patients in the surgical ward. Many needed special care, so she found she didn’t have a moment to think of anything else. Finally, it was time for her break and she made her way down to the cafeteria, wondering if any of her friends would be there. It would be good to see them.

  She spotted Nancy sitting alone as soon as she got in. Having collected her corn beef hash, which looked extremely unappetising, she made her way over to her.

  ‘I haven’t seen you for a while, Nancy. How are you?’

  Nancy looked up and a happy smile spread across her face. ‘April! How did it go? Was it terribly romantic? Such a shame you couldn’t stay and have a honeymoon. Will you be moving back if you pass your exams?’

  ‘What do you mean?’

  ‘The wedding.’

  ‘What wedding?’

  ‘Didn’t you go to London to marry your injured childhood sweetheart?’

  ‘What on earth are you talking about?’

  ‘Bess told us she’d seen you and you were in tears because he’s badly injured, so you had to go to him and that you were going to marry . . .’ Nancy stopped, noticing the horrified expression on April’s face for the first time. ‘Oh no. Has he died?’

  April felt sick. ‘No! He’s not dead, and I didn’t marry him. I was never going to marry him. Why on earth would she say that? I went because he was asking to see me and he doesn’t have long left.’

  Nancy frowned, looking puzzled for a moment. ‘But Bess told me and Mattie that you’d run off to get married, and it was all terribly romantic. She said we mustn’t tell anyone, though, and I haven’t, I promise.’

  ‘But it’s not true! I don’t understand why she’d say this. She knew I’d be back.’ The thought that Bess would tell such a lie when the truth was so very different upset her greatly. She knew Bess didn’t like her much, but when she’d last seen her she’d been so kind and sympathetic, but she’d known, hadn’t she, at the back of her mind, that Bess couldn’t be trusted, she just hadn’t felt strong enough to think about it at the time. ‘Has she told anyone else?’

  Nancy went pale. ‘Oh dear.’

  ‘What?’

  ‘Oh, April. I have a horrible feeling she’s trying to cause trouble for you. We’re the only people at the hospital she told, but . . .’

  April felt the first flutterings of unease in her stomach. ‘Who else did she tell?’

  ‘The other day, I saw her outside with the major. I must say I thought it was strange, especially as she had her arm around him. But when I asked, she explained about the wedding, so it all made sense. I think she must have told him, April.’

  ‘But I was never going to marry him and he’s not my sweetheart. Oh, no! What am I going to do? And why would she do that? After everything with Eunice, and her being so kind that day, I thought that maybe we could at least be civil to each other.’

  Nancy shook her head. ‘Oh lord! Bess is my friend, but this is going too far even for her. She’s always been jealous of you and this whole business with the major has blown it all out of proportion.’

  ‘But why? I’ve never done anything to her, and she only met Crawford a couple of times.’

  Nancy was quiet for a moment, then she said, ‘Look, I probably shouldn’t tell you this but I think it will help you understand. Bess has had some problems before. She gets fixated with people and just doesn’t let go. It happened with this pilot just before you arrived. She gets in too deep too quickly with men and scares them off.’

  ‘But it hasn’t happened with Red.’

  ‘She’s only seeing him as a way to keep tabs on the major and you. Anyway, this poor pilot was hounded by her. He was stationed at the base in St Merryn, and she used to write to him all the time, sometimes twice a day. And then she started loitering outside the base waiting for him, demanding to know why he hadn’t answered her letters. Got to the point when he had to get his commanding officer to have a word with matron. She got such a telling off, was told if she was ever seen there again, she’d be dismissed for bringing the hospital into disrepute. She felt he’d betrayed her. But really, the poor man just wanted to escape.’

  April was astonished. She knew Bess was insecure, but she’d never have guessed that it was this bad.

  ‘Then, not long after, you arrived, and everyone seemed to love you. I suppose she was just feeling so hurt and upset that she needed someone to vent
her anger on. Then, when you started walking out with the man she thought should have been hers, it got worse. Seems she’s transferred all her feelings from the pilot to the major.’

  ‘But I still don’t understand. Why is she trying to ruin my life? How could she do this to me? She even told me Eunice didn’t want to see anyone, so I stayed away, but Eunice thought I’d abandoned her. I could have lost my friend. Is she trying to take everything away from me?’

  ‘Maybe. And I expect she thinks the major is the sort of man who can get her away from everything. Security, you know? I don’t think she’s really had that before.’

  Even though she was distressed, April was surprised at the other girl’s sensitivity. People often dismissed Nancy as a good-time girl who was only interested in men and having fun, but April realised they’d all underestimated her. She’d always known she had a good heart, but there was a lot more to her than that. Homer was a lucky man.

  ‘But what if he believes her? What if he thinks I was playing with him?’

  ‘You need to write to your major and let him know it’s not true.’

  ‘Yes, yes. I’ll do that as soon as I get home. Surely he won’t believe a word of it.’

  ‘Of course he won’t. He seems to really like you. And I’ll speak to Bess. It’s high time she stopped her ridiculous games. Even I’m running out of patience.’

  ‘Thank you for telling me, Nancy. Seems we’re all in a bit of a pickle at the moment. Except you. How is Homer, by the way?’

  ‘Oh, he is lovely, April. I think I really am in love. This is the first time in my life that I haven’t got bored. I know I can seem like a bit of a flibbertigibbet and I know I can be a bit much sometimes . . . Homer tells me that all the time.’ She giggled. ‘But he makes me feel calm. My mum is thrilled. I took him home before they went off, and she adored him. Even though . . . you know. She doesn’t care, she’s just happy I’ve found such a good man. She knows that if things get really serious and we get married that Homer will have to stay, so she’s even said that we can live with her if we have to.’