To Love, Honor and Cherish

by Timothy Paterson

  Chapter 9

  The rest of Christmas vacation flew by. Before long, school was back in session. Mary was getting excited about upcoming events in her life. In May, she would be confirmed and in June, she would graduate from the eighth grade. She started hitting the books with a renewed vengeance, studying as much as possible.

  Matt, was glad school was back in session as well. He had many friends at school and he liked hanging around with them. Matt had been going through a major growth spurt and as he got taller, he felt awkward and clumsy. He found himself tripping over his own feet. Matt also found that the girls were smiling at him a lot and when they did, he felt funny inside. He got embarrassed and would turn away from them.

  One evening in late January, Matt told Joe that he had found himself acting goofy whenever there were girls around, and that he had become very clumsy. Joe told him that he was probably going through puberty.

  Joe asked Matt if his father had ever talked to him about the ‘Birds and the Bees’. “You mean the sex talk?” asked Matt, “He was supposed to tell me everything when I turned twelve next month, but now he’s gone.”

  Joe told Matt, that if his mother approved, he would tell Matt all he needed to know. The next morning, Joe talked to Betty and asked for her permission to talk to Matt about girls and growing up. He told Betty that his parents had given him the talk when he was eleven. Joe had all of his mother’s medical books and since she had been a labor and delivery nurse, Joe knew everything there was to know about the anatomy and physiology.

  Betty gave Joe permission to talk to Matt. She was actually relieved, because she thought Matt would be embarrassed if she talked to him about that subject.

  That night after dinner was over, Joe took Matt into the library and over the next three hours, Joe told Matt everything that he needed to know and answered all of Matt’s questions honestly, in terms that he could understand. After they had finished, Matt thanked Joe and then he went into the family room where his mother was sitting on the couch.

  Betty asked Matt if he had learned anything from Joe that he did not already know. Matt replied, “I learned a lot from Joe. I learned the correct names for the body parts of boys and girls and I learned the real facts about sex.” Matt was feeling a little embarrassed talking to his mother about this, but he continued. “Joe also told me that girls and women should be treated with respect at all times, and they should be treated as human beings, not as prizes or trophies. He told me to always be polite to girls, never to belch, or use swearwords or other vulgarity around them. I should open doors and give up my seat, not only for women, but also for the elderly and disabled as well. Joe told me that I should never force a girl to do something that she did not want to do and that I should not do anything that I was not ready to do. He told me not to let peer pressure cause me to do something stupid. Joe told me that there was no dishonor in being a virgin and that he was glad he still was one. He told me that sex was a special love between a man and a woman who were in love with each other and they should be married. Joe also told me that his motto in life, was ‘to love, honor and cherish; not only God, but friends, family and life as well.”

  Then, Matt surprised his mother by doing something that he had not done for over a year. He leaned down, kissed his mother on the cheek, and said, “I love you, Mom. Thanks for everything you have done for us.” Then he went to bed.

  Later that night, when Betty saw Joe, she thanked him for talking to Matt. “You made quite an impression on Matt.” She said. “From what Matt told me, I know his father would never have given him as meaningful of a talk as you did. I hope you stick around, as I still have four more sons and possibly one more after that,” she said as she touched her belly. Joe told Betty that she had done a fine job of raising her family and her children had turned out great.

  Joe and Betty found out just how serious Matt had taken Joe’s talk a week later. Mary and Matt got off the school bus one afternoon and Matt ran straight to his room and closed the door. When Betty asked Mary why Matt was so upset, Mary told her and Joe what had happened at school that afternoon.

  “Matt and I were waiting at the bus stop at school with a bunch of other kids, when a couple of eighth grade boys started teasing a girl from the seventh grade. Next, they knocked her books out of her arms and her books and papers went flying. Matt, who has never stood up to anybody before, told the boys to leave her alone. Then, Matt started helping the girl pick up the books and papers. Well after that, the boys started to pick on Matt too. Matt just ignored them, but when they started swearing and calling him and the girl a lot of vulgar names, Matt went right up to them and told them that if swearing made them feel tough, to go do it somewhere else. He said; ‘These ladies don’t want to hear it.’ Matt wouldn’t back down and soon, all of the girls there, started cheering Matt on, and the other boys got nervous and walked away.”

  Mary stopped to catch her breath and then said “Mom, I have never been more proud of Matt as I was today.” “But, why did Matt run into his room and close the door?” asked Betty. “Well”, began Mary, “after the boys left, a lot of the girls started telling Matt what a great guy he was for sticking up for the girl and some of them patted him on the back. Then, the girl who had been teased suddenly went up to Matt, gave him a big hug, kissed him on the cheek, called him her ‘knight in shining armor’, and thanked him. I have never seen Matt blush that much before. His face got bright red. I think that he’s still a little embarrassed.”

  Betty went into Matt’s room and told him how proud she was of him. “It took a lot of courage to stand up to those two bullies, Matt.”, said Betty.

  “Joe was right, Mom” said Matt. “Girls do deserve respect. Even if those guys had pounded me, I would do it again, because it was the right thing to do.”

  The next day, the word got out around the middle school about the incident at the bus stop. All of the girls were smiling at Matt and saying nice things to him, all day long.

  The principal had found out what happened and had called the bullies’ parents who made the boys apologize to the girl the next day. The principal told Matt that he wished more boys would be as thoughtful and caring as he was.

  Matt had suddenly become very popular with the girls. Though he remained very humble and didn’t let the popularity go to his head, Matt was feeling good inside.

  The following Friday was Valentine’s Day. Matt got valentines from every girl in his class as well as several more from other girls in the school. Mary had made him a special homemade card that said; “To the most wonderful brother a girl could ever have! I am so proud of you. Love, Mary”

  That night, there was a Valentine’s Day Dance at the school and Tommy, a boy in Mary’s class had asked her to go with him. Mary thought he was cute and agreed to go with him. That evening, when Mary came out of her room, Matt told her how pretty she looked. Betty and Joe agreed. She was wearing the fancy dress she had gotten for Christmas and her clip-on earrings. Joe drove her to the dance and told Mary to save a dance for him.

  Mary had a great time that evening. She and Tommy danced every dance and Tommy was a perfect gentleman. When Joe picked Mary up from the dance, he looked the other way as Tommy gave Mary a quick kiss goodbye.

  By the time Joe and Mary got home, it was 9:30 pm. When they walked into the house, Mary turned on the radio and found a station that had some slow songs and then she told Joe, “I saved the last dance for you.” Joe and Mary danced around the family room. Mary put her head on Joe’s shoulder and told him that she was glad he had come into her family’s life.