To Love, Honor and Cherish

by Timothy Paterson

  Chapter 28

 

  The next six months were very busy for Joe and Mary. They had begun making plans for their wedding, to be held the following June. They had obtained permission to be married in Mission San Francisco de Assisi; a mission church that was over two hundred years old. Pastor Timothy Jacobs from their church had agreed to perform the ceremony.

  Eve Adams, a good friend of Mary’s from College was going to be her Maid of Honor and Matt would be Joe’s Best Man. Mark and Luke would be groomsmen and John and Paul would be ushers. Sarah and Becca would be bridesmaids and Betty would give Mary away.

  Besides planning the wedding, Mary had started working at SaraCom in the finance office. Joe was also busy at SaraCom, as well as with his duties as coach, scoutmaster, tutor, etc…

  In November, the Rogers family received a big surprise. It was Thanksgiving week and Matt had finished his classes early and arrived home from college, two days before Thanksgiving.

  There was a knock on the door and when Sarah answered it, she saw a man standing on the porch. He asked Sarah what her name was and when she answered, he told Sarah that he was her father.

  Sarah got scared and slammed the door. She started screaming. Matt ran downstairs and asked her what was wrong. Sarah told Matt; “There is a man on the porch who says he is my father”. Matt felt the hair on the back of his neck stand up on end.

  Very slowly, he opened the door. For the first time in over nine years, Matt was staring into the face of his father, James Rogers.

  “Hello Matt” said his father, and tried to hug Matt. Matt quickly stuck out his hand and said; “For a long time after you left, I used to pray that you would come back home, but I realized you weren’t coming back, so I gave up on that dream. Why don’t you leave us alone? You are no longer part of this family.” Jim started to go into the house, but Matt pushed him back onto the porch.

  “When I was eleven, you made me feel like I was nothing, but I’m not that kid anymore. I am not afraid of you anymore. I do not need you anymore. Why don’t you just go away?”

  Joe, Mary and Betty had just come in from the backyard and when they heard arguing, they went into the living room. When Betty saw Jim standing there, she got chills. She had never expected to see him again, especially after all of these years. Betty had been granted a divorce two years earlier, claiming he had deserted the family.

  Jim was trying to reason with Matt and tried to apologize to him. That just made Matt angrier. “How dare you show your face here after what you did? You took all of our money, left us with mounds of debt. We lost our house because of you. Now, you come around and expect us to forget all of that and welcome you home with open arms?”

  Betty thought this would be a good time to step in and stop Matt from killing Jim. As Betty walked into the room, she said “Hello Jim. It’s been a long time”.

  Jim said hello and when he saw Mary, he said, “Is that my little Mary?”

  Mary did not answer him. She just introduced Joe “This is Joe Williams, my Fiancé.” Joe and Jim shook hands. It was a very awkward moment for everyone in the room.

  Within, the next few minutes, the rest of the family came into the room, Mark, Luke, John, Paul and Becca. Betty told everyone to leave so that she could talk to Jim.

  Joe saw how upset Matt was and he convinced Matt to go for a drive with him. Joe told Matt to go a little easier on his father. “He can’t erase the past nine years, but he’s here now. You don’t have to have a father-son relationship with him, but at least be act civil towards him.”

  Matt did not want Joe to lecture him, not now. Still very angry, Matt turned his anger towards Joe. “Look who’s talking about forgiveness and compassion? How are your grandparents, Joe? Why haven’t you invited them over for dinner? You have no right to give me advice about my dad when you won’t even talk to your grandparents.”

  Joe did not say anything. He thought about what Matt had said and he knew what he said was true. The rest of the drive was silent. When they returned home, Joe went to make a phone call, and Matt drove off in his own car.

  Jim knew that it would be hard to return home and ask for forgiveness from his family. He had been running from his past, for nine years now. His gambling had led to drinking and soon he had lost everything. He could no longer hold a job, and he had no money and no place to live. He had no family or friends. He had hit rock bottom. Jim knew that if he did not get some help that he would be dead within a year.

  At a homeless shelter in Los Angeles, he finally reached out for help. He dried out and started going to Alcoholics Anonymous meetings as well as Gamblers Anonymous.

  Over the past year, Jim had been trying to sort out his life. Part of his treatment, was seeking forgiveness from all those he had hurt. For Jim this was the hardest thing in the world. He thought death would be easier, but he finally decided to go find his family and try to atone for his mistakes. When he finally found the address where his family lived, he kept postponing the visit. Finally, he realized he could wait no longer.

  Betty listened to Jim tell his story of his pitiful life. She told him that it would be a long time before the children could ever trust him or accept him again, if they did at all. Paul was only two when he left and the twins had never known him. To the three of them, Jim was a total stranger.

  Betty felt sorry for Jim and invited him to Thanksgiving dinner. She told Jim to be patient with the children and give them time.

  Matt drove around for an hour trying to clear his head. Finally, he drove to the church and found Pastor Jacobs in his office. The two of them talked for over an hour.

  Pastor Jacobs let Matt talk for over 30 minutes, to get all of his anger out. Then he started counseling him. After they were finished, Matt realized that deep down he still loved his father and that was why he had constantly prayed for him all of these years. What Matt thought was hatred, was actually his anger towards his father.

  Pastor Jacobs told Matt to take his time reconnecting with his father. “If you are meant to strengthen your bonds with your father, then it will happen,” he said.

  Later that day, after Jim had left, Betty had a talk with Matt and Mary. She told them that she had invited Jim over for Thanksgiving dinner. She told them what Jim had told her about his life’s downward spiral. She asked them if they could put aside their feelings for the day and be civil towards their father. Matt and Mary both said they would try.