Not His Type

by Shanna Hatfield

  Dr. O’Brien stopped and took a sip out of his cup of coffee. “Anna is a bit young for this type of tumor. We usually don’t see any symptoms until the patient hits their thirties. But considering the fact she was born with hearing loss, I’m inclined to think she may have had this since birth. The good news is that we can get her into surgery Monday and remove the tumor.”

  The doctor took out some drawings from the folder and scooted them across the table, using his pen, he pointed to a picture of a patient’s head.

  “Right here, behind her ear, we will shave off this little section of her hair, make an incision, remove a tiny portion of her skull and take out the tumor. This type of procedure is the least invasive and keeps us from having to move or protract the brain. We don’t want to do either of those things if at all possible. We would put Anna under with a general anesthesia, remove the tumor and then harvest a piece of fat from her abdomen to replace the bone that is removed. This also helps prevent the possibility of spinal fluid leakage. A pressure bandage is then applied and Anna would spend the first night in ICU. From there she would spend three to five days following a postoperative course. She will have trouble with dizziness and balance for a few weeks and then it will start to fade away. She won’t be able to drive for a month to six weeks and any sudden movements of her head may cause a dizzy spell for several months, but after that, she should be as good as new.”

  The doctor sat looking into the hopeful faces across the table from him. He loved it when he could calm a patient’s worse fears into something manageable.

  “That sounds simple enough” Ken said. “Although, I’m sensing a ‘but’ in there.”

  “You are quite perceptive, Mr. Zimmerman. I would be remiss if I didn’t tell you there are a few things that could go wrong. Not will go wrong, mind you, but I wouldn’t be doing my job if I didn’t tell you about the risks that are involved. They are minimal and, as I said, I’ve had several successful surgeries without any incident.”

  “And those risks would be?” Jake asked, his foot jiggling in impatience.

  “The tumor grows on the eighth cranial nerve. If it continues to grow at a rapid rate, it can start crowding onto the seventh and Anna will suffer permanent facial nerve damage. I would normally talk about hearing loss, but that won’t be an issue in this case. There is less than one percent chance we may find cancer on the tumor. There is also a very slim and remote possibility something could happen during the operation and she would lose vital spinal fluid, or the brain could suffer irreversible damage.”

  “So what is the worst case scenario?” Anna finally spoke. “What is the very worst thing that could happen?”

  “Things don’t go well and you spend the rest of your life in a vegetative state. Your seventh cranial nerve is damaged and your face will never look the same. The scalpel slips and you die.”

  Dr. O’Brien made it sound so matter of fact. Anna at least knew what to expect.

  “You must understand, Anna, that the worst case scenario is just that. Worst case. I am extremely confident that we can do this surgery successfully and see you return to a normal life within a few months.”

  “Would Anna have any limitations after the surgery, once she has recuperated?” Jake asked, curious to know if Anna’s lifestyle would be altered dramatically.

  “Her only limitation would be her own strength. She is just going to get tired much more easily. When that happens, she will have to learn to recognize it and rest. That is pretty much it. Many patients try to return to their normal activities too soon or ignore the fatigue. My advice is to give yourself plenty of time to get your strength back and then stay in tune to what your body tells you. If it says take a nap, do it. So, what do you say, Anna. Shall I book you a suite in our fine establishment for Monday morning and get this little problem taken care of?” The doctor offered an encouraging smile.

  “Let’s do it,” Anna said, feeling both relieved and frightened.

  On the drive home, Jake read through some literature the doctor gave them to prepare for the surgery and recuperation time ahead.

  “Okay, Anna, it says here to be prepared for not being able to drive yourself. You should be able to resume driving in four to six weeks. That’s not so bad,” Jake said. “It also says if you wear glasses, remove the arm so it will fit over your bandage during the first few days of recovery. That’s simple enough. I can take care of that.”

  “Could you take care of it with an old pair of my glasses, please,” Anna asked. “I waited so long to get my new glasses, I don’t want to accidently lose the arm piece or anything like that. I can live a few days with hideous glasses, but not another two months.”

  If Anna’s parents hadn’t been in the car, Jake would have mentioned to Anna that the two months she waited for those glasses were worth every minute and then some because he had no idea a pair of spectacles could be so sexy.

  “Check, old glasses,” Jake said with a chuckle. “It says to stock up on chewing gum and chew frequently before and after the surgery to ‘engage the appropriate nerves and muscles. This will aid a rapid recovery.’ Add gum to the shopping list.”

  “What else does it say?” Sue asked from the front seat.

  Jake continued reading. “‘When you get worn out, rest. You many experience personal limitations and must learn to recognize them. Give yourself permission to say no to demands of others and get plenty of rest.’ That’s it.”

  “Well, we’ve got a lot to get done between now and Monday, don’t we?” Anna stated.

  Sue turned around in the front seat and gave Anna a look only a mother could muster. “We? There is no ‘we’ Miss Anna Marie Zimmerman. Read that last part to her again, Jake. I don’t think she heard you clearly.”

  Jake laughed, surprised by the way Sue put Anna in her place. Anna, in turn, looked like she was about to pout. Instead, she sighed and leaned her head against his chest, closing her eyes. Jake placed his arm around her, drawing her closer.

  “Maybe I’ll rest a bit right now,” Anna said, settling into Jake’s warmth.

  <><><>

  The surgery was scheduled for 9 a.m. Monday morning. Jake was up and out the door by 4:45 a.m. and wasn’t surprised to see all the lights on at the Zimmerman’s when he pulled up at their house twenty minutes later.

  Sue was making breakfast with Lisa’s help while Sam and Ken sipped coffee. Anna hadn’t yet emerged from her room, but running water indicated she was probably taking a shower. Jake took a mug out of the cupboard and helped himself to a cup of coffee, then sat down next to Sam. Sue placed a platter of bacon, fluffy scrambled eggs and biscuits on the table, but no one seemed to be in the mood to eat.

  “We really should eat something,” Sue said. “It’s going to be a long day ahead of us.” The doctor explained that due to the nature of the surgery, it would take many, many hours. They knew they were in for a day of sitting and waiting.

  “Come on, guys,” Lisa said, picking up a biscuit and breaking it open. “We’re going to sit here and have a normal breakfast like we’ve done many times before and act like everything is fine. We’re going to be as normal as possible for Anna’s sake. Anna wouldn’t want…”

  “What would I not want?” Anna asked as she slowly walked into the room, dressed in jeans and a warm sweater. She looked so pale and exhausted Jake could hardly stand to see her feeling so ill. If there was any way they could trade places, he would have done it in a minute. He stood up and kissed her cheek, putting his arm around her as she finished her trek to the table and sank onto a chair.

  “To miss this great breakfast,” Sam finished for his wife. “Sorry you can’t eat anything this morning, sis. I guess I’ll have to make up for your share.”

  “Only if I leave you a few crumbs,” Jake teased. He hoped their joking would fool Anna. He didn’t know about the rest of them, but it was going to take all his fortitude to eat his breakfast and keep it down. He knew the surgery should go well, but there was just something abou
t having Anna’s head cut open and someone digging around in it that caused him to be more than a little unsettled about the whole process.

  Pretending an interest in the food they all were far from feeling, Lisa and Sue made short work of the breakfast dishes while the guys finished up the chores and decided they better get on the road. Sam and Lisa would take her car while Ken, Sue, Anna and Jake would go in Sue’s car.

  Once they arrived at the hospital, Anna was soon whisked away while Sue filled out the necessary paper work and Jake and Ken paced around. Sam and Lisa went to the cafeteria to get coffee for everyone.

  “You two might as well cool your heels because you’ve got hours and hours ahead for pacing,” Sue said, looking up from the clipboard in her lap. “Besides, you’re making me nervous with your fidgeting.”

  Jake sat down and began jiggling his foot. When Sue shot him a glare, he sighed and ran his hand through his hair. This was going to be the longest day of his life.

  After what seemed like hours, but was in fact closer to forty-five minutes, a nurse came and told them they could sit with Anna until she was ready to go to surgery. They crowded into a tiny room where the men leaned against the walls while Sue and Lisa sat in the two available chairs.

  Sam, bless his heart, decided the group had become way too somber and asked, “Do you remember the time Anna and I…” and distracted everyone with funny stories from their childhood. By the time the doctor came to speak with the family, they were all feeling in much better spirits.

  “Well, aren’t you all a lively group for this early in the day?” Dr. O’Brien asked, smiling at them. “Are you ready to do this, Anna? The quicker we get started, the sooner you can set your feet on the road to recovery.”

  “Then let’s get going,” Anna said with a bravado she was far from feeling. What if something did happen? What if she never woke up or woke up with some paralysis? What if she woke up completely deaf? What if she turned into a vegetable?

  She didn’t really have a choice, but she was scared. There were too many things that could go wrong. The last thing she wanted was to become a burden to her loved ones. Thinking of loved ones made her think of Jake. If anything happened to her, she wouldn’t hold him to any promises. He was much too full of life to be stuck with someone who would never be whole.

  As a nurse began escorting her family out of the room and showing them where they could wait, Anna asked to speak privately with Jake.

  “Of course,” Dr. O’Brien said. “We’ll give you five minutes, would that be satisfactory?”

  “Yes, thank you,” Anna said, grateful for the doctor’s understanding. Jake came back to the bed and held her hand. His hand lacked the warmth she was accustomed to feeling. Instead it was cold and clammy.

  “Jake, are you okay? You don’t look like you feel well.”

  The irony of the situation nearly made him laugh. His fiancée, the love of his life, was heading in to have a brain tumor removed and she was asking him if he was feeling well. Releasing a sigh, he bent over and brushed her lips with his.

  “Anna, I love you so much. What did I ever do to deserve you?” Jake asked, trying to keep the emotion he was feeling from completely overwhelming him.

  “Come on now, fancy boy, we both know you literally swept me off my feet,” Anna teased, hoping to lighten the somber expression in Jake’s eyes but saw it wasn’t working. She decided to say what was weighing heavy on her mind and heart.

  “Jake, if something happens, if something bad happens in surgery, I want you to walk away and not look back. I don’t want you to be tied down with an invalid, or worse. Promise you’ll let me go if it comes to that.”

  Anna was going to cause him to break down right here in front of her if she didn’t stop with this foolishness. Jake leaned over so his face was just inches from hers and looked deep into her eyes.

  “Anna, I asked you to marry me because I want to spend every day of our lives together, no matter what. So no matter what, I’m going to love you until my very last breath. You got that, Sugar? No more of this kind of talk. I’m here for the long haul and that is all there is to it. Besides, I decided you are going to breeze through this surgery and be just fine.”

  Leaning closer he rubbed her nose with his and pulled back to give her a loving smile. “You aren’t the only one who can be stubborn and mule-headed, you know.”

  Anna smiled at him, knowing when she opened her eyes, Jake would be right there waiting for her. He gave her another quick kiss as Dr. O’Brien walked in the door. “All right, Anna, time to get this party started.”

  As a nurse began pushing her bed out into the hall, Anna grasped Jake’s hand and he walked along for as far as they would let him. When they reached a door at the end of the hall, they stopped briefly. Jake gave her one more kiss and said, “I love you forever, Sugar. I’ll be right here when you wake up.”

  Anna smiled through the tears that were forming in her eyes, “I love you, Jake, forever and always.”

  <><><>

  They were only an hour into the wait when Jake looked up to see his mom, dad, Callan, Clay, Josh and Jenna walking down the hallway. Surprised, he got up and gave them all a warm hug.

  “What are you doing here?” Jake asked, unable to hide his relief at seeing them all.

  “Well, goodness, Jake,” his mother said, dabbing at her teary eyes. “Anna’s going to be our daughter soon. Did you really think we wouldn’t be here? Bobbi and Steve would have come as well but they are watching the twins and will pick up Audrey and Emma this afternoon, but they send their love.”

  Tom and Ken shook hands, while Sue and Maggie hugged and cried and consoled each other. Callan took Jake’s arm and gave it an affectionate squeeze.

  “I know how hard it is to wait, Jake. It’s a painful, difficult thing. You waited with me when Clay was here, so here we are to wait with you.”

  Years before, Clay had been horribly injured in a freak accident out at the ranch. The doctors weren’t sure he would survive and Callan waited through days of uncertainty, praying he would live.

  Jake spent many hours sitting with her then, along with other members of the family. As worried as he was today, he needed the reminder that things could be a whole lot worse. Anna was having a routine surgery. She would come out of it and be fine. He couldn’t imagine what it would be like if he had no idea of the outcome.

  “Those were some hard days, weren’t they Callan?” he said, giving her another hug. “I’m so glad you guys came. It means a lot to me.”

  All the family members were well acquainted from the time they’d spent working out at The Cottage and gathered for impromptu dinners. Even so, Jake chose to sit next to Clay. There was something about the companionship they shared that made it comforting just to sit together and know the other one cared.

  “You know, Jake, if you could harness all the prayers being said on Anna’s behalf today and use them to heal, she’d come running out that door any second,” Clay said, in a conversational tone. “I don’t know how you happened to find a girl that is so completely opposite of your so-called type, but she is wonderful. I don’t think you could have found anyone better suited to you.”

  “No, I don’t think so either,” Jake said quietly, turning retrospective. “She’s too good for me. I feel so humbled and honored that she loves me. I wasted my life up until the moment I met Anna. Completely wasted it. What was I thinking? I was awful, Clay. Shallow, self-serving, demoralized to an extent. I love Anna, but every time I’m with her, I see all that wasted time, all the things I should never have done. I’m not good enough to shine her shoes, let alone be her husband.”

  Clay sat and studied Jake for a moment. Jake was always a nice kid, helpful and thoughtful of others. He worked hard and was as honest as the day is long. But the one area that had always made the family shake their heads was the way he ran around with the “loose crowd,” as his mother liked to refer to his friends. Jake could be obnoxious and somewhat conceited when he
was with them. He refused to set foot in church, often sleeping off the effects of his Saturday night fun. Although he never said anything, Clay had a pretty good idea of the things he was now regretting.

  But since Jake met Anna, it all seemed to just go away. Jake became a more genuine, caring person. He was finally settled and grounded. The things that used to be so important to Jake now made him think of all the time he wasted in pursuing them. The things he used to make fun of now seemed very important to him. In short, it appeared that Jake had finally grown up and Clay was pretty sure the reason for that was Anna. Sweet, gentle Anna who loved Jake openly and wholeheartedly.

  “She’s been good for you. You know you’ve always been special to me and Callan, but since Anna’s been in the picture, you’ve completely changed. We are so proud to see the man you’ve become.”

  Jake didn’t answer, couldn’t answer. He needed time to swallow down the emotion that was threatening to choke him. He simply nodded his head.

  Clay knew he had to lighten Jake’s load before they both got too caught up in the sentimental feelings. “Besides, I figure if she has no problem popping a rattlesnake on the head with a hammer, she can keep you in line.”

  Jake laughed softly, and looked at Clay with gratitude. “Yep. I have to walk a tight line, I tell you.”

  By the time they’d sat and waited six hours, Jake was ready to climb the walls. Callan took him out for a walk, even though it was bitterly cold and the January wind sliced through them. Jake put his arm around Callan as they walked along the path through the now frozen flower garden.