I am not so pretty anymore, chata.
“You idiot. Is that why you’ve been hiding here?” She wrapped her arms around him and buried her face against his fur.
No, my love. He plopped onto his side in the damp grass and wrapped his forelegs around her. And then he changed, faster than her brothers ever could, and Javier was holding her in his arms, crushing her to his bare chest. “I have been here healing.”
She looked into his beautiful face and touched the ugly red scars on his neck, a couple lighter ones on his cheek, still unable to believe this was all real, fearful she was dreaming. “I could have helped.
I’m a doctor.”
He shook his head. “I could not return to you in that condition.”
The scars would fade with time, but how long had he planned to stay away from her? Did he really think her so vain? “Don’t you know that it doesn’t matter what you look like? I love you.”
“And that is why I could not return to you as I was after the battle.”
“We looked for you...”
“I knew you would. I buried my scent from your brothers, who no doubt gave in to you and tried to help you find me.”
She frowned at him. “Why...”
“Because, Heidi,” he said, his gaze so intense it raised goose bumps on her sides, “the next time I saw you, I would claim you as my own. I was in no shape to accomplish that at the time.”
Her lips parted on a soft gasp.
A small smile curled his lips. “If you are agreeable, of course.”
“Of course.” The words came out hoarse, and she swallowed hard. Her mind seemed to blank out.
Questions swirled, but she couldn’t get any to come out her mouth. Was it over with the snow leopard? Had Javier done what he needed to do? Was he over losing his first mate?
“Mi chatita, you must tell me if you will accept me as your mate, your lover. Your husband. Your only.”
Elation surged through Heidi, and she leaned down and kissed Javier hard, sinking her tongue into his mouth, tasting him once again and falling into the desire that always consumed her when he was near. Her husband. Her mate. Something she thought she’d never have. She pulled back to find him a little glassy eyed and laughed. “Yes, Javier. God, yes.” She kissed him again.
He rolled her under him and kissed her in return, his tongue surging into her mouth, his naked body so deliciously hard against her.
There was no more discussion as Javier stripped the clothes from her body, barely taking his mouth from hers. The grass was cold and wet beneath her, but his body was hot, warming much more than just her flesh with his.
“Please,” she whispered when he nipped at her shoulder, her neck, that special spot beneath her ear.
“Bite me. Make me yours. Please.”
His playful nibbles made her want to scream. The fact he pinned her legs between his, not letting her rub herself against his long, hard cock, made her want to cry. Instead she arched her back as far as his big body allowed, giving him her chest.
“Such beauty,” he murmured, a mixture of humor and depth in his words. He licked her nipple, and she gasped. He suckled the other, and she moaned. “I will thank God each day that it was you who saved me.”
“Me too. God, me too. I love you, Javier. I never thought...” She grabbed his head and pulled him up so she could kiss him.
He kept the pressure light, gentle, when she wanted his passion. Needed it like she needed air.
“You are sure?” he asked between kisses to her forehead, her eyelids. “Once I make you mine, I will never let you go, Heidi. Not ever.”
She laughed.
Javier raised his head to frown down at her. “You find my declaration humorous?”
Still smiling, she shook her head. “Javier, sweet man, I have lived with shifter men my whole life. I know what possessiveness is. I know that we will fight, we will argue, and I will drive you mad by not following everything you decree to be what is right for me.” She put her fingers over his mouth when he looked as if he would speak. “But sweetheart, you must know I have never loved another man. I never thought I would. You are my one. Of that I have no doubt.”
“And you are my one, Heidi.” He kissed her then, slowly, deeply, his tongue dipping repeatedly into her mouth to rub against hers. He nibbled her bottom lip. And then he moved lower, kissing her neck, the swells of her breasts, treating her nipples to a quick lick before he nipped the sensitive skin over her ribcage, dipped his tongue in her navel. And then he spread her legs.
“Javier, come on,” she cried in frustration, bucking her hips. “Get on with it. Mark me and then fuck me. Please!”
He chuckled. “In this, chata, you are not in control.” His hot, wet tongue slid up the length of her pussy and flicked her clit.
She jumped at the shock of pleasure and grasped handfuls of damp grass and flowers to keep from grabbing him and demanding more.
The assault on her pussy continued with licks, flicks and suckling that made her whimper, cry and shout. Yet, he wouldn’t let her come. Every time she thought she was close, he’d change position, change the pressure.
“You don’t play fair,” she cried, trying to press harder against his mouth, but he pinned her legs and abdomen so she could barely move, only submit.
Submit.
Become his.
The thought sent her into orgasm.
Javier growled against her and slipped long fingers into her cunt. “Again, chata.”
And she did. Again, and again as he suckled her clit and hit her G-spot with those beautifully long, thick fingers of his. When she thought she couldn’t possibly take any more, when her ears rang and her cries of ecstasy were hoarse, a sharp, stinging pain pierced her inner thigh, and she came so hard she saw stars in the brightness of the foggy gray sky.
And then he was within her, over her, his weight heavy and wonderful as he pumped into her, slammed into her. He gripped one thigh and raised her leg. She tucked it over his ass, her limbs rubbery.
He looked down into her face, and she stared into his beautiful eyes. “I love you,” she whispered, her voice rough.
He kissed her then, and yet another orgasm rolled through her at the same time he stopped moving, pressed hard into her, and his cock pulsed within her. “I love you too, Heidi,” he began then murmured telepathically, Oy, chata, te amo mucho. Mi corazon...mi vida.
I love you, Javier... my mate.
Chapter Fifteen
Javier held Heidi against him until she shivered, and then he told her to get dressed. After pulling on the pair of jeans from the tent, he glanced at the cloud cover and decided the rain would hold off a little longer, so he built a fire in the small pit he’d fashioned a few days earlier and brought down the cache of scavenged foods he’d raised into the tree limbs overhead.
“Where’d you get all this stuff?” she asked, huddled in her damp jacket, warming her hands over the fire.
“Here and there.” He handed her a package of cookies and a can of cola.
Heidi narrowed her eyes at him, and he grinned.
“You’re a thief.”
“Where I am from, jaguars are considered wily, not thieves. Sit here.” He positioned a piece of deadfall close to the fire.
She sat without another word and tore into the cookies’ plastic wrapping. After she consumed a couple and popped the top on the cola, she said, “I was really pissed when I got here and saw the tent and fire ring.”
“I...heard you.” He opened his own can of soda and sat on the ground next to her.
“Why didn’t you show yourself then?”
He gave her a sheepish grin. “You are rather formidable when you are angry.”
She shoved his shoulder and laughed. “It’s good to know I can put the fear of God into my mate.”
She sipped the drink. “My brothers have never been scared of me.”
He took her hand in his and brought her fingers to his mouth, kissing the backs of each one. “Your
brothers have never lived in fear of you rejecting them.”
She wrapped her arm around his shoulder and laid her cheek against the top of his head. “I told you, in your hotel room, I didn’t want you to go. How could I ever reject you?”
He sighed in contentment. His woman. His mate.
“We didn’t use protection,” she said softly.
He tensed. She did not want to have his children? He’d been so sure. “No, we did not.”
There was a long stretch of silence, in which he tried to decide how to continue the subject. This was something they needed to discuss, and he’d do anything in his power to convince her to try to have children with him. If it didn’t work, he was open to adoption, so long as she was there by his side. He would never let her go, of course, even if she rejected both ideas, but it would hurt. Knowing there was hope, even if it were slim...
“My period came the day after you disappeared,” she murmured, and then she slid off her seat and onto his lap, wrapping her arms around his neck after she set her soda can on the ground. “I cried. I had so hoped that a miracle happened that one night we weren’t careful.”
“You want children,” he said, gazing into her amber eyes, willing to lose himself there forever.
“Almost as much as I want you.”
“Then why the condoms?”
She nuzzled her nose against his neck and sighed. “I didn’t want you to feel obligated.”
He chuckled and squeezed her tight. “Oy, chata. You are a wonderful, crazy woman.”
With a frown on her face, she leaned back and looked at him. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
He just grinned. “I will do everything in my power to impregnate you.”
“I’m sure you will.” She sobered a little and her face grew wary. “Um. There’s...” She cleared her throat and patted his shoulder. “Shit.”
“What is it?” he asked, worried at her change. “What is wrong?”
“Axel.”
“Ahh.” He nodded. “Yes. I must admit he has crossed my mind.”
“You didn’t exactly ask his permission to claim me.”
Javier raised one eyebrow, which made Heidi laugh.
“What are we supposed to say to him? He’s going to be pissed, you know that, right? He’s the family alpha.”
Javier cupped her chin. “Heidi.”
She raised her eyebrows in question.
“He is not your alpha any longer. I am your protector now, your mate.” He held his breath, waiting for her response.
A smile tilted her lips, and she placed a soft kiss on his cheek. “I know. I am yours. But I’m going to be far, far away when you tell my big brother that.”
He hugged her hard, crushing her body against his, and laughed.
“I do have a couple of questions.” She pushed back to look him in the face again and then straddled his lap, making herself more comfortable.
“Anything, my love.”
She touched the scars at his throat, then on his stomach and sides.
“Is the Russian snow leopard...”
“Dead.”
“Good. So we never have to worry about anything like that again?”
“I pray that is the case.”
She huffed out a quick breath. “What about Isabel?”
“I do not understand. She has been gone for two years.”
Heidi swallowed hard and set her hands on his shoulders. “When you first came here, you dreamed about her. The first time you kissed me, you were half asleep, and you said her name.”
“I am sorry, Heidi. I was...not myself.”
“I know that. I understand. You were on a lot of medication. What I need to know is...” She bit her bottom lip, her brow furrowing.
He touched her cheek with his fingertips, her concern evident in her inability to speak her mind easily. “What do you need to know?”
“Can you love me like you loved her?”
“Oh, chata.” He pulled her into his arms once again and pressed his cheek to hers. “I love her. I will always love her. And at times I am certain I will remember her as I do my brother Juan. But she is my past. You are my present and my future.”
In his time here in Heidi’s glade, he’d come to realize that Isabel had loved him as he had loved her.
If she were the one still alive, he’d want her to find happiness. He had done what he set out to do.
Isabel’s murder had been avenged. Now it was his time to live, to love again.
Heidi breathed out a slow sigh and relaxed against his chest. “Good. Because I’d fight her ghost for you, you know.”
He smiled into her damp, mussed hair and breathed in her sweet scent. “That, my little cougar, I am sure of.”
“One more question.”
He dropped his hands down her back and cupped her sweet, round ass. “Go on.”
“What does chata mean?”
He barked with sudden laughter, tumbling backward and pulling her with him.
“What? Why are you laughing so hard?”
“It means you are my sweet funny face.”
Heidi gasped in indignation and tried to get off him, but he banded her to his body with his arms.
She smacked his shoulders. “You think I look funny?”
He rolled her beneath him and pinned her arms and legs, all the while still laughing. “It is a word of affection where I am from. You have the cutest little nose.” He kissed her adorable nose. “When I awoke in that cage and saw you there, even though I was furious and in pain, your beauty, your charming face... I felt affection for you.”
Heidi’s expression of anger slipped into a grin. “Don’t you ever tell my brothers what it means.”
He kissed her on the nose, the cheeks, the chin. “Never, chata. It is my word for you, and you alone.” He kissed her again, and again, and again.
Two months later Heidi stared at her reflection in the mirror and couldn’t believe the woman who looked back. The gown was new, purchased on a whirlwind shopping trip to Seattle with her sisters-in-law. When she found it in a store that sold vintage clothing, she’d snatched it up, much to Beth’s and Dakota’s dismay. They’d wanted her to buy the traditional white gown with a flowing train, lots of lace and a ten-foot long veil. Overly dramatic in Heidi’s opinion.
This dress was out of a childhood dream. A simple scoop-neck dress with a rich, burgundy velvet bodice and antique white gathered skirt that fell to her shins.
A knock on the door before it opened had her turning to see Beth and Dakota enter. She grinned at them.
“You do know how jealous of you we are, right?” Dakota said as she touched the tiny cap sleeve of Heidi’s gown.
“I know,” Heidi said with a smile. “You two have made that very clear. But you have two men to...you know. That should make up for it, right?”
Beth chuckled. “He’s a great guy. We’re so happy for you.”
“He is, isn’t he? Even if the boys are still undecided.” She frowned. “They’ll come around, right?”
Dakota cleared her throat and looked away.
“What? What do you know?”
Her sister-in-law grinned at her. “I happened to overhear a conversation a few minutes ago in the den.”
Heidi groaned. Her soon-to-be husband was getting ready in her dads’ den, a decision mandated by her fathers, and one that had worried her to no end. “Was Axel threatening his life again?”
“Well, yes,” Dakota said, “but once Javier had sworn to protect you, as we’ve all heard him do countless times, Axel said something else.”
“Axel once threatened to make us leave Leavenworth. He didn’t do that again, did he?”
“Oh, come on.” Beth rolled her eyes. “Like your brothers—or your fathers for that matter—would ever let you out of their sight. Even if you do belong to a new alpha.”
“Then what did he say?” Heidi asked Dakota.
“He said that he wished Javier all the luck in the world...because
he was going to need it if he wanted any control over you.”
All three girls burst into hysterical laughter. Heidi hugged her sisters-in-law, her best friends.
“I don’t think even luck will help there,” Beth said, and they all laughed harder.
A knock on the door, and they quieted.
“Yes?” Heidi called.
“Your groom is waiting,” Burke said.
She grinned at Beth and Dakota. “I’m so glad you’re here.” She squeezed their hands. “Thank you for not being toooo jealous.”
The girls giggled, and then Heidi opened the door.
Burke and Fridrik both stood in the hallway, wearing tailored charcoal suits. They were so handsome. Heidi rushed into their arms. “I love you, daddy,” she said, encompassing them both.
They both whispered endearments to her and each kissed her cheek. “Come along,” Fridrik said.
“Everyone is waiting, and Javier is looking rather impatient.”
Her fathers each took one of her arms, and they escorted her out onto the back patio. The morning air was crisp with fall, clear and sunny, yet a tinge of dampness sweetened the scent of the forest pines. Mums in shades of orange, yellow and red poured from the planters and pots positioned around the yard and patio. She turned and grinned a thank you at her bridesmaids. They’d worked all the day before preparing the house for the small wedding and reception, not letting her raise a finger except to get a manicure.
Dakota gave a thumbs up, and Beth swiped a tear from her eye.
At the top of the steps leading to the lawn stood Javier, and Heidi’s heart skipped a beat. Never had a man looked so gorgeous, so virile, as he did wearing a black-on-black suit and tie.
Both fathers shook his hand, and then Burke passed her hand into Javier’s. His strength, his warmth, seeped into her, and she couldn’t stop smiling.
You’re beautiful, Javier murmured telepathically to which Fridrik responded with Smart boy, making the couple and her siblings chuckle.
“That’s something I’m going to have to get use to,” Javier muttered to her as they moved down the few steps to the lawn where the minister, a family friend, waited under an arch of fall flowers. He’d expected the telepathic link to exist between her and him once they’d mated but had been surprised to learn it extended to her blood relations, even while in human form.
Falke’s Renegade pn-3 Page 15