Mastering Love

by Morticia Knight

  Someone. Anyone.

  He’d never gone about searching for a partner in such a calculated way before. Most of his dalliances had been with men he’d met at whatever club he was attending at the time and had struck his fancy. Since he’d been spending most of that time on the road, he’d never had the opportunity for anything long-term. The only other places where he’d ever come across a lover was at a pansy club or gin joint. But those liaisons had typically been quick and without any hint of sadomasochism or other perversions. It was too risky a prospect without knowing who you were dealing with.

  In his current situation, he had the oddest sensation that he was at a market picking out the ripest melon. It didn’t do anything to spark his libido. The young men he’d run across since arriving at the bathhouse had all been attractive. When he’d discreetly inquired of the manager which of the men might be untried, he’d pointed him in the direction of two or three. The manager had made sure to assign one of those men to him as his towel boy.

  He glanced up as the door opened. As if on cue, said boy entered the room. He had a shy smile but didn’t seem to have any issue with meeting Ned’s eyes. If he had to make a guess, he would assume the boy to be quite young, perhaps not yet twenty. It wasn’t only his appearance—he couldn’t imagine any young man venturing much past that age with his virginity intact.

  The manager had been vague about the towel boy’s circumstances, but had admonished Ned to be respectful. That had reassured him that what Saul had told him about the bathhouse was accurate. It didn’t appear that any of the young men were being coerced.

  “I brought you some dry towels, sir. And if you’d like, I could make sure that Roger replaces the stones.” The boy worried the bundle of towels in his arms. “Or I could see if the manager would allow me to bring them. That is, if you’d prefer.”

  Obviously, the boy would welcome his attentions. He was polite, pretty, had a lovely form that was showcased well in the white shimmering loincloth he wore and seemed eager to please.

  He’s perfect.

  Ned sighed. Not perfect. He had absolutely no desire for the fetching young man. The boy had averted his eyes, a slight wrinkle marring his brow. It seemed as though he’d interpreted Ned’s sigh as one of displeasure.

  “What’s your name?”

  He brought his eyes back up. “Colin. Colin James.”

  “I see. May I have the towels please, Colin? It’s getting cooler in here and I’d like to dry off before I catch a chill.”

  The boy’s expression turned into one of horror. His eyes had widened, his jaw dropping open as he scurried to Ned’s side.

  “Oh, I’m so sorry, sir. Here, let me help you.”

  Colin placed the towels in Ned’s lap then quickly plucked one open. He proceeded to pat Ned’s neck with it, after which he rubbed the soft cloth over Ned’s shoulder and upper back. Ned was too stunned to respond immediately.

  “Lean forward, sir. Then I can reach the rest of your back. After that, you can drape this around your shoulders while I finish drying the rest of you off.”

  Ned clasped his wrist and the boy stilled. “Colin, lay down a dry towel then have a seat next to me.”

  “But, sir, if I may—I don’t want you to be uncomfortable. If you would just let me—”

  “Colin. Please do as I asked.”

  “Of course. Please forgive my impudence.”

  Ned hid a smile behind his lips. Such a delightful young thing, yet Ned’s shaft remained annoyingly soft. He had no interest whatsoever in him sexually, but he was concerned about Colin’s well-being. He’d yet to meet a lost soul whom he didn’t wish to save.

  After Colin had taken a seat and—Ned noticed—had carefully arranged the strip of cloth to prevent it from revealing too much, Ned spoke.

  “What brings you to the Temple of Eros, young Colin?”

  “Oh. Well, I met a fellow at the train station when I first arrived in town. He asked me if I’d like to join him at the bathhouse. I told him that he seemed very nice, but I was saving all my money to get a place to live, so I couldn’t afford anything so extravagant.”

  “Let me guess. He offered to pay your way for the pleasure of your company?”

  Colin reddened. “I told him I could only stay a little while because I needed to find a hotel and start looking for a job right away.”

  “And I imagine he either offered you a place to stay or perhaps some money to give him more pleasure than just your company?”

  Colin lowered his chin. “I suppose you think I’m rather stupid.”

  “Head up.” Ned smiled. “That’s better. You have lovely eyes. No, Colin. I don’t think you’re stupid. I think there are men out there who prey on innocents such as yourself. Please continue with your story. I won’t think badly of you, no matter what you say.”

  “Well…he brought me here, but the manager stepped in. He pulled me aside and asked me if I knew the man, and when I told him what happened, he offered me a job instead. The man became angry and accused me of taking advantage of him.”

  Ned snorted. “That’s rich. You taking advantage.”

  “Yes, well the manager, Mr. Davenport, he paid the man for his time and trouble then suggested he leave.”

  “And how do you feel about working here?”

  “I need the job, sir, so I’m very lucky to have gotten one so quickly.”

  “That didn’t answer my question.”

  The boy reddened again. “I don’t want to sound ungrateful.”

  “Telling me your feelings doesn’t make you ungrateful. It’s simply the truth.”

  Colin appeared to consider Ned’s statement. “Oh. In that case, I don’t like it very much.”

  “Good. Thank you for answering me so honestly. What is it about the job you don’t care for?”

  “Can I tell you what I enjoy about it first?”

  Interesting. Tends to have a positive outlook.

  “Certainly.”

  “I like…” Colin paused, a flush rising up his body and into his cheeks.

  “You like…?” Ned arched his eyebrows as if inviting him to continue.

  “It’s nice to wait on people, make them happy.”

  “Do you mean by bringing them the towels?”

  “Well, yes, there’s that. But I also get the private rooms ready, bring them juice or water, sometimes fruit or other items. I make sure the steam rooms and bath area are clean and tidy. That makes Mr. Davenport happy. He always tells me I do the best job he’s ever seen.” Colin had a wide grin on his face.

  “I see. Do you do anything else to make the men happy, such as going into one of the private rooms with them?”

  He shook his head vigorously. “Oh no, I would never do that.”

  “And why is that, Colin?”

  His expression turned to one of fear, and Ned was fairly sure he knew why.

  “Don’t fret, Colin. I’m not asking you to go to a room with me.” The boy frowned, and Ned almost laughed. “Not that you aren’t beautiful and tempting, but I have other reasons to know. I take it that you’ve never been with a man before?”

  “No. Of course not. I’m good.”

  Another thought occurred to Ned. “So you don’t prefer men? You only like women?”

  “Oh, I love men. It’s not that. I’m just waiting, that’s all.”

  If he thinks he’s saving himself for marriage, he’s probably soft in the head.

  Ned kept his voice patient. He had no desire to humiliate him. “What is it you’re waiting for?”

  “My grandmother always told me to wait for the right man before I had relations.”

  Ned almost choked. “You’re grandmother told you that?”

  “Yes. She told me everything because she raised me.”

  “And she knew you liked boys and not girls?”

  “I told her when I was thirteen, but she said she already knew. Then she said I shouldn’t tell anyone else—that I’d get in trouble and it could be very bad.
I figured out what she meant later when other boys at school would say awful things about fags and queers and so on.”

  Ned grunted. “Yes. I’m familiar. Where’s your grandmother now?”

  Colin’s lip trembled, and Ned knew.

  “There, there. I have a feeling you took very good care of your grandmother the way she took care of you. I’m sure she wanted you to be happy, so let’s see if we can’t figure out how to make that happen, all right?”

  “All right.”

  “Now, you’ve told me what you like about the bathhouse, and I’m guessing what you don’t like is the men wanting to take their pleasure with you. Is that correct?”

  “Yes. It makes me feel bad that I can’t give them what they want and it also makes me very uncomfortable when they stare at me or say dirty things. Some of the men are…um, I’m not trying to be mean…”

  Ned laughed. “Not what you’re attracted to?”

  Colin sighed. “That’s a good way to put it.”

  “Hmm. Let’s see. I might have an idea for you, especially since you enjoy serving others.” Ned considered Colin carefully, not sure how to broach the subject with the innocent young man. “I don’t want to make you uncomfortable, Colin, so if you don’t want to answer me, that’s fine. I won’t be upset. I take it you’ve never done anything with a man?”

  He nodded. “That’s right.”

  “What do you suppose you would enjoy doing with a man if you ever found the ‘right one’?”

  The blush that stained his cheeks was so pronounced, Ned worried he might faint.

  “I…” He looked away, mumbling something.

  “Colin. Eyes on me please.”

  He turned back. “I’d like a strong man.” He bit his lip. “You’ll think it’s strange.”

  “To help ease your mind, Colin, I’ve been with quite a few men and I’ve indulged in what many would consider to be very strange activities. However, I don’t think it’s that way at all, and I have several friends who believe the same thing. You can tell me if you like, and I won’t make fun of you.”

  He took a deep breath then blew it out. “I never told my grandmother this—or anyone at all. But I want a strong man who holds me down, makes me his, makes me do…” His blush heightened again. “Makes me do whatever he wants, shows me everything a man can do with another man.” His eyes widened. “But only with the right man. I don’t want any man to force me. Only if I ask him to.”

  Ned locked gazes with him. “That’s very important, Colin, and I’m glad you said that. Be careful not to share what you just said with any man whom you don’t know. As a matter of fact, I know of a place that’s safe to talk about wanting to wait on a man and find one who’s strong and would take care of you. If you’re lucky, you might even find the right man you wish for there. If you no longer want this job, I’m sure another less uncomfortable one can be found for you. Would you be interested in that?”

  “Oh. Well, it sounds very nice, and I’m very interested.” His face fell. “But I can’t disappoint Mr. Davenport. He’s been so good to me and it wouldn’t be right.”

  “As it turns out, Mr. Davenport works for the man who owns this bathhouse and who also owns the place I’d be taking you to. I’m sure there won’t be any problem.”

  Colin’s face brightened. “Really?”

  “Really.”

  “Oh, thank you, sir. Thank you so much.” Colin picked at the towel he was perched on. “Do you like me, sir?”

  Uh-oh.

  “I like you very much, Colin, but not in the way you want.”

  An expression of hurt passed over Colin’s face, and Ned decided it must be his week to inadvertently cause pain to sweet young boys. His breath caught. He was such a dolt. The marked contrast in his reaction to Colin upon their first meeting and his reaction to Evan was startling. What difference did it make if Evan wasn’t a virgin and had already had two Masters? Someone innocent and untrained like Colin was what Ned had thought he wanted. He could spend his whole life searching for the intangible bond he’d so effortlessly shared with Evan the week before. Colin was the epitome of the man Ned had insisted was the perfect one for him. But Colin wasn’t the right man—Evan was.

  Maybe it’s not too late.

  “I see.” Colin rose from the intricately tiled surface. “If you’d like, I can replace these towels with fresh ones. Or perhaps there’s someone else you’d rather have wait on you.”

  Ned rose with him then clasped a hand on his shoulder. “That’s enough. I only say that because I already have a boy.” He wasn’t sure if he was lying, but he hoped to make it the truth that very evening.

  “A boy?” Colin gazed up at him, confusion on his brow.

  “He’s my ‘right man’.”

  “Oh. So that’s the only reason you aren’t interested in me is because of that?”

  Ned didn’t want to compound his fib, so he declined to elaborate. “Yes, the only one. He’s a part of the club that I want to take you to. I think you’ll like it there. There are many men such as yourself who have either already found the right man or who are searching for one of their own.” Ned chose his next words carefully. “The club also has strong men like you spoke of. They’re called Masters, and they’re looking for boys who wish to please.”

  Colin’s eyes rounded, his mouth forming a small ‘o’.

  “I should warn you that all the men there, the boys and the Masters, all like strange things too. Some of the activities they participate in might seem quite strange—perhaps even frightening the first time you see them. But you are never expected to do any of the things you see or hear about. As a matter of fact, the unattached boys stay in a separate area until a man wishes to spend time with him. There are no relations, no sex, unless the boy wishes it. There’s staff in place to protect the young men, and there are rules for the Masters to abide by. Anyone breaking the rules is thrown out.”

  “Um, why would I be seeing any of the things the men do?”

  Ned smiled. “That’s another thing you don’t have to do if you don’t want. It’s one of the strange things I spoke of that goes on at the club. If you’d rather, you can go to the den where the young men wait and you never have to view any public acts.”

  “I guess I could always try it first.” He cleared his throat. “As a learning experience, of course. It would probably be a good idea.”

  His cheeks had stained again, and Ned allowed his gaze to drop briefly to Colin’s flimsy covering. It appeared that Colin thought it was a very good idea.

  Ned regarded him with a smile. “It probably would. How about we both get changed into our street clothes and I’ll inform Mr. Davenport that you’ll be coming with me. Is that agreeable to you?”

  A happy grin adorned Colin’s face and Ned felt secure that the boy would enthusiastically embrace his new circumstances. His thoughts turned to Evan. The first thing he would do after he got Colin settled would be to search him out. If only he wasn’t too late. In Evan’s hurt and anger, he might have already found someone new. He might never want to have anything to do with him again.

  Chapter Eight

  There were just a few other boys in the den where the unattached submissives waited for a potential Master to seek out their company. Since Evan had only been to the club one other time and that had been exclusively in Ned’s company, he knew nothing about the other boys in the room with him. Two of them seemed to know each other rather well, and even though they’d been genuinely friendly when he’d arrived, it was obvious they were involved in their own conversation that had nothing to do with him. The solitary boy reclined on a love seat, his eyes closed. That was either his way of letting others know he wished to be left alone or he was simply napping.

  Evan was alternately bored and anxious. The overwhelming need to find out whether Ned was in the club was about to make him go off the rails. He had to admit that he wasn’t too proud of himself. Pining over someone who not only didn’t want him but whom he barely k
new only succeeded in making him ashamed.

  But if he did want me, if we did know each other…

  If. He couldn’t live his life hoping for an ‘if’.

  The knob turned on the door and Evan froze, his throat closing up. He straightened on the edge of the oval-backed, green velvet side chair, his heart hammering against his ribs. Was it Ned? Was it another Master seeking company? His stomach seemed to twist into knots.

  An older man, perhaps early forties, entered the room. The door was always left open when a Master entered—the staff member who’d brought the Dominant to the den waiting nearby while he made his selection. The ruggedly handsome man peered at each boy alternately. The two submissives, whose names he’d completely forgotten, had paused their conversation. At last, the Master settled his gaze on Evan. He stepped closer.

  “Good evening.” He extended his hand, smiling. “My name is Franklin. And you are?”

  The other boys resumed their chatter and the submissive on the sofa had seemingly dozed off again. Evan took Franklin’s hand, shook it once, then let go before Franklin could attempt to kiss it.

  “I, uh, I-I’m Evan, Sir.”

  “It’s wonderful to meet you Evan. You’re very beautiful. Do you like being tied up in very restrictive positions? I’m also seeking a boy to pleasure me with his mouth. Would that be agreeable to you, Evan?”

  No. No, no, no. It would not be agreeable at all.

  He couldn’t push the words out. All he could do was openly stare at the seemingly nice man whom he likely would’ve gone with if it hadn’t been for…

  Ned.

  Apparently, the one night with Ned wouldn’t be as easy to discard as he’d hoped. He could be as determined as he wished in attempting to banish Ned from his world, but that didn’t guarantee success. Obviously, he wasn’t ready to move on yet. Perhaps he should seek Ned out—risk humiliating himself one more time on the chance that Ned had experienced second thoughts. He needed to talk to someone about it. His thoughts were all muddled.