Forgotten

by Susan Lewis

  As the door closed behind her Jerry got into the car, trying not to mind that her father always seemed to matter so much more than he ever had. Every time there was a crisis, or a celebration, or anything at all, she’d call David first, almost as though she didn’t have a husband. The day Lawrence’s condition had been diagnosed it was David who’d been with Rosalind, holding her hand and seeing her through the dreadful trauma of it all, while Catrina was at a meeting in Taunton and he, Jerry, was flying back from Shanghai. And as if to punish Jerry for not being a worthy father, who had Lawrence developed his only attachment to – if such a grand word could be applied to something that never allowed touch, or teasing, or any kind of normal bonding? David, of course, because the heroic David had always been there, living less than ten minutes away, so constantly ready to tend to any mishaps or confusions, to sort the dramas and soothe Rosalind’s nerves when Lawrence’s tantrums became too much. In his bleaker, more self-pitying moments Jerry would tell himself it was no wonder he’d had an affair – who wouldn’t when they were hardly appreciated, or even wanted, at home, and when a woman like Olivia, vivacious, uncomplicated and crazy about him, was so eager to take him on?

  After starting the engine, he slotted his BlackBerry into the hands-free device and watched the messages come up. He wasn’t surprised to see Olivia’s name amongst them, because it was usually there, and as he envisaged her, petite and blonde with her laughing eyes and turned-up nose, he felt the familiar ache of loss and need come over him. If things didn’t start improving at home soon, he knew in his heart that he wouldn’t be able to ignore these emails for much longer.

  * * *

  Inside the house Rosalind was struggling to stop herself from crying as she explained to her father what had happened. ‘It was awful, Dad,’ she was telling him brokenly. ‘I was so afraid, and when I couldn’t get hold of you …’

  ‘Darling, I’m sorry. We were having a nap, but he’s all right, you say? You’ve found him now.’

  ‘Yes, he’s sitting right here, all in one piece, thank God.’

  ‘So what made him run off?’

  ‘He just keeps saying they were going to kill Lucy, but the only Lucy I can think of is the dog. Oh God,’ she groaned as it finally dawned. ‘Lawrence, was there a dog in the film?’ she asked him. ‘One like Lucy?’

  Lawrence began to nod, up and down, up and down, long, deliberate movements that almost brought his chin into contact with his chest.

  ‘All right,’ she said, putting a hand out to steady him. ‘That was it,’ she told her father. ‘Obviously something was happening to the dog in the film and he … Oh Lawrence,’ she said exasperatedly. Knowing the retriever was hers was bad enough, that Lawrence must have, on some level, bonded so deeply with it, brought a rush of jealousy, like bile, to her throat. Yet how could she not be pleased to realise that her son was capable of feeling worried about and protective of someone – or something – other than himself?

  As though echoing her thoughts, her father said, ‘It was a dreadful thing for you to go through, darling, but it’s very heartening to think that he cares about the dog.’

  ‘Yes,’ she mumbled. Then, to her surprise, since Lawrence didn’t much like phones, he suddenly stuck out a hand to reach for it.

  ‘David,’ he shouted into the earpiece.

  ‘Like this,’ Rosalind said, gently turning it around. ‘OK, speak now.’

  ‘David. Don’t let them hurt Lucy.’

  ‘No, I won’t,’ David promised. ‘Would you like to see her next weekend?’

  ‘Yes. That would be very agreeable. Where are you?’ he added, looking around the room as though David might be hiding somewhere.

  ‘Not far away,’ David answered. ‘I hope you understand that running away is not a good thing to do.’

  Lawrence fell silent.

  ‘Please tell me you won’t do it again.’

  ‘They were going to kill Lucy,’ Lawrence shouted.

  ‘It wasn’t real. It was a film, and the dog you saw wasn’t Lucy. It was an acting dog that looks like her.’

  Lawrence shoved the receiver back at his mother, indicating he’d had enough.

  ‘I should make him something to eat now,’ Rosalind said, going back on the line.

  ‘OK. Is Jerry there?’

  ‘No, he left a few minutes ago.’

  ‘I don’t like to think of you on your own after such a shock.’

  Wanting to tell him he could always come over, she said, ‘I’ll be fine. Dee’s calling in on her way home, and I expect Sally will drop in later too.’

  ‘All right. I’ll call again tonight when I’m back in London, in the meantime, don’t go blaming yourself for what happened. No one could have foreseen it, and thankfully it’s turned out all right.’

  If she was going to blame anyone, it would be his damned girlfriend for bringing a dog into their lives in the first place, but she managed to bite back the pettiness and say, ‘I’ll be here all evening, so don’t forget, will you?’

  At his end, as he clicked off the call, David was looking pensive. Lisa had already taken some bags down to the car, but he was torn now between going back to London with her and spending another night in Bristol with Rosalind. Opening up the calendar on his iPhone to check what he had scheduled for the morning, he was about to call Rosalind back when Lisa came into the room saying, ‘I keep meaning to ask, have you decided yet where you’re going to stay the night before the wedding? I mean, I know the official bit is at the registry office the day before, but if we’re going to treat the Saturday as if it’s the real thing, it’s supposed to be bad luck for us to stay under the same roof, and we’ll have moved into the house by then.’

  With a twinkle in his eye as he slid his phone back into his pocket he said, ‘I’ll probably summon one of my harem to keep me company at the Hotel du Vin, so please don’t worry about me.’

  Laughing, she said, ‘Just make sure she doesn’t wear you out before we go on honeymoon. Have you found a hotel for us yet, by the way?’

  He frowned. For the moment he couldn’t seem to remember where they were going, much less if he’d booked a hotel.

  She eyed him meaningfully. ‘I know you’re teasing me,’ she smiled, ‘but just tell me this, are we leaving on the Saturday or the Sunday?’

  ‘Sunday,’ he said confidently. He’d have it written down somewhere, he felt sure, so could always amend later if need be, and deciding not to start reading the same sinister reasons into his forgetfulness as he had before, he picked up the remaining bags and carried them down to the car.

  Chapter Eleven

  ‘DAVID!’ LISA CRIED in despair. ‘I know we need to make a list of the books we want duplicated in your library at the house, so instead of standing there repeating instructions, why don’t you find a pen and paper and do it?’

  Fighting back his own ill temper, David tugged open a drawer of the desk they shared, grabbed a pencil and was rummaging around for a notepad when Lisa growled, ‘Where the hell are the scissors? I had them a moment ago and now they’ve disappeared.’

  Glancing across the room, which was currently an obstacle course of packing cases, black plastic sacks and mountains of paperwork and magazines still needing to be sorted, he said, ‘Try the fridge.’

  She looked up in amazement. ‘What?’

  ‘Try the fridge,’ he repeated, and swiping a sheet of paper from the printer tray, he set about making his list.

  A moment later Lisa returned from the kitchen with the scissors. ‘How did you know?’ she asked.

  He nodded towards a carton of milk on the table. ‘You made coffee just now, and brought that back with you, so there was a good chance the scissors had been left to chill out next to the champagne.’

  Laughing, she went to kiss him. ‘Sorry, I’m really irritable today, aren’t I? I don’t know why. I suppose there’s so much to do and such little time left to do it in that I’m afraid we’ll forget something vital. When you’ve fini
shed there, I’ll have to go over everything to make sure the movers know what they’re supposed to take and what to leave behind.’ She glanced at the time. ‘I hope Amy’s getting on all right overseeing the deliveries at the house. I should give her a call. Actually, it’ll have to wait because I have to go and pick up Roxy’s dress. Are you expected back at the office today?’

  Reaching for his iPhone to check the calendar, he said, ‘No, this afternoon’s meeting’s been cancelled and tonight’s announcement on spending reform has been … What does that say? Dlyd – delayed until Friday. I must remind Karen that I’m not strong on text-speak.’

  ‘So that means you have to be in London on Friday?’ With a sigh of exasperation, she said, ‘I thought we were leaving tomorrow to spend our first weekend together at the house.’

  ‘I’ll just have to pop back to London for the announcement,’ he assured her, and clicking on his phone as it rang, he said, ‘Colin, to what do I owe the pleasure?’

  Leaving him to chat with his buddy the Foreign Secretary, she returned to the box of photographs she was ready to tape up, but got no further than dropping to her knees before her own mobile started to ring. Managing to locate it down the side of the sofa, she quickly answered before the call went to messages, sounding impatient as she said, ‘Yes? Hello?’

  ‘Hey! It’s me,’ Roxy cried, her ebullience bringing an immediate smile to Lisa’s face. ‘You haven’t forgotten my dress, I hope.’

  ‘I’m going for it any minute. Where are you?’

  ‘At the new house with Mum. It’s so gorgeous, Lis. The ponds have got water in them already, and they’re floating flowers and plants all over them as I speak. The landscaper told me they’re turning on the waterfalls this afternoon to make sure they run down over the terraces to the courtyard the way they’re supposed to, but then they’ll be off again for more backstage work. It’s going to be heaven, I can’t wait for you to see it.’

  ‘Nor can I. Has any of the new furniture turned up yet?’

  ‘Yeah, loads. Mum’s with the caterers at the moment, they wanted to check out what facilities you have in the kitchen. Hang on, she’s saying something … She wants to know how the kitchen doors slide back … Oh, it’s all right, they’ve worked it out.’

  A beat later Amy came on the line. ‘What are you doing about flowers on the steps going down to the courtyard?’ she asked. ‘Is the florist doing them, or do you want the caterer to take care of it?’

  ‘I’m pretty sure I’ve discussed it with the florist,’ Lisa replied, ‘but I’ll check and get back to you. Have you spoken to Mum today?’

  ‘About an hour ago, so if it’s about her shoes, I already know she doesn’t like the ones we bought last week, she wants mauve to match her dress – thank you Mum, I know I can always rely on you to make my life easy. What time shall I expect you tomorrow?’

  ‘Around midday, I guess. Listen, I’ll talk to you again later, someone’s trying to get through.’ As she clicked off she found herself wondering, hoping, dreading that it might be Tony. She kept doing that lately and it was driving her crazy. It wasn’t that she wanted to hear from him, but for some insane reason his silence was annoying her more than if he was calling every day.

  It turned out to be Hayley on the line, wanting to know if she could drop round with a wedding gift.

  ‘But we’re not doing gifts,’ Lisa cried in protest. ‘It was on the invite. Donations to the new Bristol Children’s Hospital.’

  ‘I know, and I promise I’ve already made one, but there’s a certain Indian abstract you’ve long had your eye on, and from what I heard about the new house I think it’ll fit in perfectly. So the girls and I have clubbed together and I gave us a fabulous discount.’

  ‘Oh Hayley, it’s still too generous. I mean …’

  ‘Just tell me when to bring it. It’s already packed up, so the movers won’t have to do anything apart from handle it with care.’

  ‘I’ll make absolutely certain they do. That’s so wonderful of you all. It’s going to get pride of place somewhere, that’s for sure. Either in the entrance hall, or I think it might work best in the sitting room.’

  ‘Your choice. Are you at the flat for the next hour or so?’

  ‘No, I have to go out, but I can pick it up on my way back, if you like. Is it heavy?’

  ‘Quite.’

  ‘Then maybe David should come and collect it. I’ll ask him, and perhaps you’ll have time for a drink with us later so we can say a proper thank you.’

  ‘Count me in.’

  As she rang off, David said, ‘So what have you roped me in for?’

  After telling him, she set about the rest of the packing, while he disappeared into the bedroom to start sorting out what he was going to take from there.

  ‘We should have done this days ago,’ she groaned when she followed him in to track down her bag. ‘Are you OK? What are you looking for?’

  ‘I’m damned if I can remember,’ he replied. ‘Look at all this stuff. Where are you going?’

  ‘To get Roxy’s dress. Then I might pop into Fortnums to buy all the staples to ship down to Bristol. Anything you need?’

  ‘Lime marmalade and the special blend tea we have. We don’t want to be without that. What time will you be back?’ he asked as she kissed him.

  ‘I’m not sure. I’ll call while I’m out. Don’t forget to go to Hayley’s. She’s expecting you any time in the next hour. Did Colin want anything in particular, by the way?’ She was already half out of the door.

  When he didn’t answer she turned back.

  ‘Hello,’ she said, waving a hand.

  His eyes came to hers. ‘Sorry,’ he said. ‘What did you …? Ah, Colin. He wondered why … It doesn’t matter. We’ll probably get together for a chat after the announcement on Friday, so don’t count on me being back much before late afternoon.’

  Though she wanted to protest, catching a glimpse of how tired he looked she softened her tone as she said, ‘I’m sorry I woke you in the night. I tried not to make a noise when I got up …’

  ‘I was already awake,’ he assured her. ‘That’s what we get for eating late and drinking too much. Sleepless nights and hangovers when we could well do without them.’ He looked behind him as his mobile started to ring.

  Leaving him to take the call she went into the bathroom, and was halfway through rebraiding her hair when he came to find her. ‘I’m sorry, I’m supposed to be at a meeting,’ he said, ‘but don’t do any of the heavy stuff without me, and when I get back we have to make a list of the books to duplicate for my study in Bristol.’

  Eyeing him meaningfully, she said, ‘Will you please stop winding me up, and when you do go online to order them don’t forget to add a new Roget’s International Thesaurus for me, and the latest Chambers dictionary. It’s time I updated, especially if I’m going to become a novelist,’ and with a playful twinkle she blew him another kiss before sweeping out into the kind of blustery day that wasn’t at all welcome, with not much more than a week to go to the wedding.

  David’s face was taut with anxiety when he returned to the flat an hour and a half later. It had been a short, but stressful meeting that had left everyone feeling frustrated and in many cases, he was sure, wondering why they’d bothered to come. The sense of failure and despondency he’d walked away with was still clinging to him like the spume of a wave, while the real rage of the tide was proving so elusive that he wanted to smash his hand against the front door as he let himself in. What the hell was happening to him? Were things going into his head and getting stuck there? Or were they just not going in at all?

  When he’d spoken everyone had seemed to listen, then they debated, challenged, agreed, and planned. He knew what had to be done, how they should move forward, but then suddenly they were looking at him as though he was a stranger who’d said something outrageous or insane, when all he’d done, as far as he was aware, was ask a perfectly straightforward question.

  ‘You’ve
already asked that,’ Colin Larch told him, ‘and we’ve given you the answer.’

  David had no idea now what he’d said in response, because looking back on the last hour or so was like listening to a badly tuned radio. Some events were clear, while others were so hazy he wasn’t sure if they were there at all.

  Still, at least he’d remembered to go and pick up the painting from Hayley, he was thinking as he let himself into the flat. And now he would go online to order the books he needed from Amazon. However, when he turned on his computer and called up his emails he saw, from the order confirmations, that he’d already done it.

  * * *

  ‘Dad, it’s me,’ Rosalind said into her mobile. ‘Where are you?’

  ‘At the flat, in London,’ he replied. ‘Is everything OK?’

  She waited for a lorry to pass, feeling the draught of warm dusty air wrapping itself around her like a veil, then began crossing the iron footbridge towards the Mud Dock cafe. He didn’t know. He hadn’t clocked what day it was. ‘Yes, fine,’ she lied, managing to keep her voice steady. ‘I was just wondering if you were coming for lunch on Saturday, that’s all.’

  The silence that followed didn’t really surprise her, but it crushed her anyway.

  ‘Darling,’ he said softly, ‘I’m sure I told you that Lisa and I are moving into the new house this weekend, but if you’d like to come over …’

  ‘No, no,’ she cut in. ‘I don’t want to get in the way.’

  ‘You wouldn’t be in the way. In fact, you’d be very welcome.’

  ‘By you, I’m sure. Anyway,’ she pressed on hastily, ‘if you change your mind, Jerry’s back tomorrow and Dee’s around, so it would be a nice family get-together if you wanted to join us.’ Had he really forgotten? She didn’t want to believe that he had. ‘It would make Lawrence’s day if you came, obviously, especially if you … if you brought the dog.’