Dead-tective Box Set (Vampire Mystery-Romance)

by Flynn, Mac

  "I'll carry him," I offered. If I could easily move manhole covers than a man would be no problem. I slipped past Bat and leaned into the car. One tug of Vince's body told me I couldn't move him. "I can't carry him," I told Bat.

  Bat's frown deepened. "Interesting, but let us both carry him," he suggested.

  With our combined strengths we dragged him out of the car, through the lab, and into the white room to plop him on the couch. Our plop must have been hard because he gasped and clutched at his chest. His eyes squeezed tightly shut and he stiffened.

  Bat leaned over him and inspected Vince's face and hands. "What exactly happened?" he asked me.

  "We were going to some witch's shack to find out if Tim left anything there before he got killed. When we got there, there was this woman being chased by a bunch of werewolves. She turned them into cabbages and ran down the road toward us. She saw me and I guess tried to turn me into a cabbage, too, but Vince jumped in the way and took the shot."

  Bat turned to me and raised an eyebrow. "Did he? And what then?"

  I nodded at my partner. "Then he clutched his chest like he's doing now and told me to get him here."

  Bat returned his attention to Vince and grasped Vince's hand. He started back, but didn't lose his hold. "My god, he's warm!"

  "Yeah, I thought he might have a fever," I told him.

  "A fever may be the least of our worries," Bat replied. He gave a few yanks on Vince's hand, but the vampire refused to move his hand.

  "Why's he clutching it so hard?" I asked Bat.

  "The heart is a very important organ for a vampire. It's the only one when, if damaged-Vincent, let go!" Bat managed to pry Vince's right hand off his chest, but Vince grasped his left hand near the same spot. "It's the only organ that, if damaged, will destroy him. Ah-ha!" Bat managed to loosen the grasp of Vince's left hand, and he held them away from Vince's chest. The vampire squirmed, but his efforts were weak and futile.

  "So all the horror movies are right about the stake?" I guessed.

  He nodded and wiped some sweat from his brow with the use of his shirt. "That's correct, but if you could hold his hands away from his chest I would be most grateful."

  "Sure thing." I moved to stand behind his head, grabbed Vince's hands and clasped them together over his head. It was surprisingly easy given how much stronger he should have been than me, his being the older undead-ish creature.

  Vince thrashed and his eyes opened. They were a strange blue color, and they glared at me without his usual demonic glower. He seemed not to recognize me, but rather to be in a semi-conscious state where the survival instinct. I lay partially against him to keep him from squirming. "Bat, there's something seriously wrong with Vince!" I told our friend.

  "One moment," Bat replied. He leaned down and pressed his ear to Vince's chest for a moment. He pulled away with a quick start and his eyes were wide as he stared down at Vince. "My god. . ." he murmured.

  "He'd better not be," I quipped.

  Bat turned to me with those wide, unblinking eyes, and I noticed his hands that lay on the couch beside Vince shook. "He has a heartbeat."

  Chapter 4

  I stiffened and blinked at him. Below me Vince stopped his futile struggles and his arms fell limp in mine. "He has a what?" I asked Bat.

  "Vincent has a heartbeat," he repeated.

  I looked to Vince and back to Bat, then did a double-take and nodded at the vampire. "He's dead. He can't have a heartbeat."

  "Undead, but that state seems to have changed," Bat told me.

  "Um, being undead is kind of a permanent condition," I argued.

  Bat rubbed his chin and looked to Vince. "It seems there may be a way to reverse the effects of un-death. One moment." He hurried from the room and the door banged shut behind him.

  I turned my attention to my invalid partner. Vince's eyes were scrunched shut and his breathing was still harsh. Bat's comment was ridiculous. Vampires couldn't become human, or at least I thought they couldn't, but I had to admit Vince showed all the signs of being human. His skin had color, he breathed in and out with alarming regularity, and he was warm to the touch. The change to a mortal also explained why I was able to hold his hands away from his chest.

  Vince's hands trembled in mine, and I gave them a squeeze. I was surprised when he opened his pretty new eyes and I looked down at him. "How you feeling?" I asked him. He shook his head and turned his face away from me. I cringed. "Not that great, huh? Bat should be-" The door swung open and Bat hurried in with a large, dusty tome clutched against his chest.

  Bat went over to us and plopped the tome onto the end table near the couch. He blew on the cover and a thick layer of dust drifted into the air. A coughing fit interrupted him for a moment and he covered his mouth with his hand as he leaned over the table. I tried to pull away from Vince to help Bat, but Vince's hands gripped mine. I turned back and his gaze caught mine. His eyes were scared, confused.

  Bat managed to get a hold of himself and he flipped open the book to near the end. His finger ran down the page full of archaic handwriting and strange pictures of herbs and hand-waving like the witch had performed. He stopped halfway down one of the pages and tapped an entry. "Ah-ha! Here it is!"

  "Here what is?" I asked him.

  "The answer to our question. It seems the witch you encountered performed a life spell on Vince which gave him a sort of false or second soul. The soul arose inside him and, uncorrupted by his vampirism because it wasn't present during his initiation into his un-death, revived his body."

  "Wait, so is this a good thing or a bad thing?" I wondered.

  Bat turned his attention to Vince who had again closed his eyes. "That would depend on the vampire. For Vincent I believe the change has been rather-well, abrupt and a shock to his system."

  Vince shuddered, but he ground his teeth together and gained control over his body. He tilted his head toward Bat and his voice was hoarse and weary. "I will be fine," he argued.

  Bat snorted. "You haven't been fine for countless centuries, and you haven't had your soul for well over a century. Having all those emotions and bodily demands beyond hunger must be a little vexing."

  "Is it temporary?" I asked him.

  He pursed his lips and shrugged. "I can't say. That depends on the caster of the magic, and it's hard to guess the strength without knowing the witch."

  "So what do we do-" My stomach suddenly gurgled so loudly the noise echoed off the walls of the room. I cringed as the growl rang through my hollow stomach. "What the hell? I'm suddenly hungry."

  Bat scrutinized my face and raised an eyebrow. "Interesting. Because of your connection to Vincent the spell has been passed on to you. You are both no longer undead, but living."

  My mouth dropped open. "Then this means-"

  "That the curse no longer applies? The only way would be to remove the ring," Bat suggested.

  I had to try this. I had to know if I was finally free of this accursed life. I had to-get my hand free of Vince's grasp. Even as a human he still had a strong hold on my fingers. I tugged, but he didn't give. "Come on, Vince, you know you want me to try. Wouldn't it be great to get rid of me?" I argued.

  Vince frowned, but he opened his hands and I was free. I stepped back and took a deep breath. A second chance at a normal life. My mind's eye flashed with the possibilities of enjoying food again, or going out shopping, or even getting a new job. Well, maybe not that last part, but everything else would be fun.

  I grabbed the ring and gave a hard yank. Nothing. I gave another and another. My only reward was raw, rubbed skin on my finger. I dropped my arms to my side and hung my head. "No-go," I muttered.

  Bat patted me on the shoulder. "There is an advantage to this situation, at least for Vincent," he told me.

  I snorted and looked up at him.. "Is that supposed to make me feel better?"

  His eyes caught mine and flickered down to Vince without his moving his head. "It may make him feel better," he hinted.

  I fo
llowed his gaze and saw that Vince's blue eyes stared at me without blinking. His arms lay limp over his head and his body shivered with these new raw emotions and demands. He looked so-well, helpless. A fish out of water in his own body. I could relate. Well, when I was a half-vampire. Now I could feel all the familiar but forgotten quirks of the human body. There was the stiff muscles, the craving for pickles and yogurt, and the unrelenting demand to go to the bathroom.

  My cheeks reddened and I turned to Bat with a sheepish grin on my face. "Do you have-"

  "There's a bathroom in the machine shop," Bat told me.

  "Thanks, I'll be right-"

  "I will accompany you," Vince spoke up. He raised himself from the couch and winced. His hand flew to the place over his heart and he let out a gasp of air. "What is this feeling?"

  "That would be your heart pumping blood through your veins," Bat explained.

  Vincent scowled, dropped his hand and swung his legs over the side. "Living is a nuisance. We must find the counter-spell to this hex and lift it."

  I stalked up to him and put my hands on his shoulders. All but his hands was as weak as a lamb and I pinned him to the couch. My eyes met his and I frowned. "If I had to live with being a nearly-undead then you can do this whole living thing."

  He scowled back at me. "This is not a natural state."

  I snorted. "Neither is being undead."

  "This is a hex cast by an incompetent witch," Vince rephrased. "We must reverse the spell before worse side effects occur."

  Bat raised an eyebrow. "Incompetent? Was she?"

  I shrugged, but kept my hold on Vince's shoulders and glanced over my shoulder at Bat. "It looked like she tried to turn werewolves into something and they changed into cabbages."

  Bat stroked his short beard. "Very interesting. With such a novice witch it will be very difficult to tell how strong is the hex without studying the long-term effects."

  Vincent scowled at Bat. "There is no need for such study. We merely need to-" He grimaced and leaned over his lap. "I need to relieve myself."

  I sighed and grabbed his arm. "Come on. I'll help you to the bathroom, but I'm not aiming your-um, your little fellow for you."

  "I can stand on my own," he insisted.

  Vince pushed himself onto his feet, but his unsteady legs shook and his knees buckled. I caught him under the arms and he fell onto me. His weight was too much, and We both fell tow the floor with him atop me. My arms and legs flailed beneath him as I heard Bat chuckle over us. "Stop laughing and help us up!" I growled at him.

  "There is. . .no need," Vince wheezed. He managed to slip off me himself and sit back onto the couch. His hand went to his chest, but he willed himself to set his arm against his side. He steadied his breathing and relaxed. "It seems I will need time to adapt to this weak body until we can remove the hex."

  I snorted. "You forgot to mention you're as weak as a baby."

  "That may be, but I will not allow my new weakness to stop me from a simple task such as walking." Vince slowly rose to his feet and locked his legs. He shuffled past us and out the door like Frankenstein's monster.

  I held in my laughter until he was out of sight, and then burst into a wild cackle. I expected Bat to join in, but he stood silently nearby with his lips tightly pursed together. His expression of concern killed my merriment. "You're really worried about him, aren't you?" I asked him.

  He gave a nod. "Yes. In our many years of knowing one another I have never seen him in such a weak position. It's unfamiliar territory for him to be so helpless, and if we find that there is no cure for this hex then the life he knew may be finished."

  I cringed. A finished life hit a little too close to home for me. "So what do we do?"

  Bat turned to me and a small smile slipped onto his lips. He nodded at the ring on my finger. "That still binds you to one another. Should one of you perish in this weakened condition then the other still dies. If there is no cure then you must care for him as well as you are able, and maybe in time he will adjust."

  I sighed and my shoulders slumped forward. "So you're telling me I have to babysit a now-human Vince until, or if, we get this hex gone?"

  Bat chuckled. "I'm afraid so."

  I walked past Bat toward the exit. "All right, but I better not have to teach him how to use toilet paper," I grumbled.

  Chapter 5

  I walked through the lab and to the bathroom that lay in the garage. The door to the lavatory was located under the stairs and I found the entrance shut. I knocked on the door. "Vince, you in there?" I called out.

  "Yes," came his weary voice.

  "You, um, you need any help? I mean, it's been a long time since you, um, went the bathroom," I pointed out.

  There came a flush, a running of water, and in a moment the door opened. Vince stood unsteadily on his feet, but had enough energy to glare at me. "There is no need for that. I am not a child."

  I glanced past him and saw the bathroom was a little dusty, but otherwise clean and had a toilet and sink. My bladder reminded me that nature called. "Good, then get out and let me have a turn." I slipped behind him and pushed him out of the room. He stumbled forward, but caught himself before he fell. I shut the door and turned to the toilet. Upon closer inspection I saw the seat was up and he-well, more than his physical strength had vanished with his change to human.

  I came out a few minutes later and found Vince leaning wearily against the wall outside the bathroom. "You need to learn to aim or you'll never get a human female to room with you," I scolded him.

  He scowled and slowly pushed himself off the wall. "I do not bring my meals 'home,'" he countered.

  I snorted. "Well, your meals are now your fellow humans until, or if, we get this spell thing taken care of."

  "Hex," he replied.

  "Eh?"

  "When a witch uses magic on someone it is called a hex."

  "Oh, right. I knew-" I paused and shook my head. "No, wait, forget it. There's no way I could have known that." Vince shuffled past me and I heard the sound of a grizzly bear emerge from his stomach. I grabbed his wrist and nodded at his noise-maker. "You hungry?" I guessed.

  He glanced down at his stomach and frowned. "Yes, but there is no time for food." There came another loud complaint from his stomach.

  "Uh-huh, well, your body is telling you it's time for food, and for humans the hunger isn't all that different from the hunger of a vampire. It's got to be fed, so we're going to feed it," I told him. I dragged him toward the car.

  Vince stumbled and struggled after me, but he still hadn't gotten the hang of his weakened body to out-muscle me. "Release me!" he growled as we rounded the front to the passenger side.

  "Sure thing," I replied. I opened the passenger door and swung him inside. He flew chest-first into the seat and I tucked his feet in before I gave him the nickname stumpy when I slammed the door shut behind him. He sat up and glared at me through the window, and I smiled back and pointed a finger at the ground. "Now stay."

  I walked around the back of the car and saw the door adjoining the garage and lab open, and Bat step inside the garage. "I heard a noise. Is there a problem?" he asked me.

  I nodded back at the car where Vince scowled at both of us. "Vince is hungry, so I thought I'd take him out for some real food," I told him.

  Bat smiled. "Then I wish you good luck in taking care of Vincent. He isn't the best patient."

  I smirked and opened the door. "That's fine, I'm not the best doctor." I hopped inside and slowly backed the heavy-duty car out of the garage. The last view we had of the garage was Bat waving to us, and then the door closed.

  I reversed until we hit the abandoned buildings down from Bat's home, and I turned to my partner. "So where do you want to go? Some place expensive? Quaint? Dirt-cheap?"

  "I wish to be taken to Hawthorn Avenue," he growled.

  I frowned. That street lay in a part of the slums about six blocks from our apartment. "Why there?"

  "If we are to lift this
hex than we must consult other witches, and many reside there," he explained.

  I shook my head. "Sleuthing isn't an option yet. Your body needs food, and if I had to feed on your terms as a human stuck to a vampire, then you have to feed on my terms as a human stuck to another human," I insisted.

  "How do you expect to pay for this outing of yours?" he countered.

  "This is how." I reached across the short seat between us and pilfered the roll of bills from inside his coat. His eyes widened and he tried to snatch the money from me, but his reflexes reflected his human status and he missed my hand by a mile. I leaned away from him and held the roll triumphantly in the air above my head. I grinned at him. "You're too slow, old man." Vince straightened and turned his face away from me. He gazed out the window and his face fell. His shoulders slumped and he looked weary. Suddenly my triumph wasn't all that triumphant and I lowered the bills into my lap. "Come on, Vince, things aren't that bad," I insisted. He didn't reply. I sighed and glanced down at the money. A bright idea popped into my mind and I smiled at him. "You know, it'll be a lot easier to find a cure to this hex if you eat something. Your body would stop complaining and we could get some sleuthing done."

  Vince sighed and looked straight ahead through the windshield. "Lead me where you will."

  "Perfect! I know just the place I've been dying to eat at!" I turned the wheel and punched the gas pedal. We jumped forward and puttered down the alleyways between the buildings.

  Vince sat silently beside me as we meandered our way through the mid-night car-and-pedestrian traffic. The hour was well past when most people usually ate and I knew the area from my past days as a plain old office girl. That combination allowed me to find prime real estate for parking near my favorite restaurant, The Italian Alley. It was a small establishment on one of the off-streets to the fashionable restaurant district. The blocky building had large windows on either side of its double-door entrance. Through the windows one could glimpse booths and tables with candles and menus with more Italian than English. The atmosphere was low-key, the crowds weren't too terrible, and the service was always there to greet you with a smile.