Love Without End

by Alyvia Paige

  Long after the water started to lose its heat, I turn the steady stream off and get myself ready for a new day, a day with family, friends, and Tracie’s traditional afternoon meal. Last night, when Hannah and I decided it was time to start fresh, I hoped that meant everything, and I was going to try my best to only move forward with her. My anger still lingered, but acceptance of the situation helped immensely. I have been holding on to so much misplaced anger and hate. Accidents happen, I know just as well as the next person, but Hannah pushes me to accept things that I cannot change, pushes me to move forward from the past, and for the first time in a long time, I feel able to breathe knowing I have my Hannah back, knowing we are a we. Once dressed and ready for the day, I notice Hannah still isn’t inside, nor is she on the bench out back. What the hell? Picking up my cell to call her, I notice a text and know exactly where she needed to go back to, I grab the keys and make my way to her.

  I saw the truck when I rounded the corner of the lot, stopping the car early to give her the quiet time I know she needs, I quickly withdrawal from the vehicle. Making my way to her as quietly as I can, I listen to the sweet words pouring from her. Knowing the pain and heartache she endures every moment steals my breath. My feet hit the gravel near the edge of the path creating a crunching noise upon each step. I stop behind her, as she wipes her face and murmurs, “Hey.” without turning around.

  “I figured I’d find you here,” I rasp crouching behind her enveloping her in my arms and she nods. I pull her tight against me and with my lips to her ear, I quietly question, “So you aren’t running anymore, hmm?”

  “No, Carter. I’m done running,” she says with confidence, grasping my forearms inhaling a cleansing breath releasing the stress she had been holding in. “Thank you for doing this for our baby.”

  “You don’t need to thank me Hannah Grace, it’s what daddies do. But we need to add another.” My arms tighten and my lips graze her temple as her body melts into my touch. “Let’s get you home and ready for Thanksgiving dinner.” Releasing my arms around her, I stand and help her up. She encircles her arms around my waist, her cheek to my chest - inhaling me as I methodically knead the tension out of her back in a delicate rhythm.

  “It’s beautiful here. Who knows this is here, Carter?” she questions without pulling away.

  Kissing the top of her head, speaking softly into her hair, “Just our parents and whoever accesses public records regarding the county plots, baby. But all they know is I purchased the plots of land in the area, so unless they followed us out here, or came snooping, they wouldn’t know.”

  “K,” she says pulling away looking into my pained eyes, then plants a long but chaste kiss on my lips before she stands and walks towards the truck to head back to my place to get ready for a day of family and thanksgiving. Looking over her shoulder as she climbs into the truck, I stand tall – shoulders back, faded denim jeans frayed at the boot hem, a red and orange plaid collared shirt perfectly in place under the grey preppy sweater that she picked out when she arrived – staring at her in bewilderment. She smirks and says, “What, sexy right?” Then slides in, starts the engine, and pulls away.

  Once back at the apartment I hurry in, send off a few text messages to Brielle, Braydon, and my mom, and then place my phone on the charger in hopes of getting ready quickly to set my plan into motion before it can be derailed. Turning the shower to hot, I step in humming, which turns to full out singing the song last played in the truck, Boom Clap by Charlie something or another, swaying my hips in time as I lather my body and hair up and rinsing consecutively.

  I hear Carter clear his throat just before a chuckle emits from the opposite side of the shower curtain. “Is that the song these days?” he laughs as he pops his head into the shower.

  “It was what Lola was playing on our way home, it kinda stuck with me.” I grin shutting off the water, collecting my hair in my hands and squeezing the excess water from me before letting it down and reaching around Carter for my towel rubbing my naked breasts against his arm. “You should move, you’re getting all wet,” I waggle my brow suggestively and step out of the shower completely.

  “Hmm, I have a feeling you are more than shower wet already, you little temptress. Good thing it’s still early, isn’t it?” he hoists me over his shoulder and carries me into the bedroom tossing me onto the bed, quickly removing his clothes to join me.

  “Baby, I need you fast and hard,” he groans into my neck and I cling to his biceps as he plunges into my core with a single thrust, taking me, filling me completely. He continues to thrusts into me vigorously, bringing me to climax quickly and stilling inside me as he empties into me.

  “Carter,” I speak into the nook of his neck trying to collect my breath, “I love you.” I rush out the words, closing my eyes, my body still singing from post-coital bliss. My phone alerts me of an incoming text message, interrupting our serenity.

  “Ugh,” he growls into my neck, biting gently on my over sensitized skin, “that’s probably your mom, I bet we need to go to the store.” I can’t help but laugh at his irritation of once again being interrupted by something or someone.

  “Now, I need another shower, round two if you are up to it, Sparky,” I say squeezing his ass, and then buck my hips at his already hardening cock.

  “Hannah, for the love of God answer your texts, it’s like a freaking panic alarm or something!” I am beyond peeved at the twenty-plus pings that have gone off in the last five minutes since we got out of the shower. Typically, I’m not fazed by the random beeps emanating from her cell, but it’s like a fucking stress signal or something. Obviously, if there were a true emergency, someone would call, and her complete lack of urgency and cunning smile, tells me she is up to something.

  “Carter, shut the fuck up, and deal. I just got everyone a little excited, don’t worry. I’ll fix it,” she tells me in a singsong voice and a smile brimming from ear to ear. Oh yeah she is getting into something for sure. I pull my navy sweater over my button up and stand directly behind her leaning in to sneak a peek at her phone.

  “Han, whatcha doin, babe?” I know I am getting nowhere by asking, but just maybe my fuckery will get me somewhere.

  “Nope not telling, forget it... wait, kiss me, maybe I will tell you.” She turns her face to me and puckers her lips; I wrap my arm around her naked waist pulling her to me and kiss her hard, imploring for more, but she pulls away batting her lashes and giggles. “Nah, maybe I won’t but I love you anyway.”

  “Hurry it up, Hannah Grace. We are going to be late.” I demand, swat her bare ass, and walk out of the bedroom where she stands in the closet trying to decide on an outfit.

  “Is this too much?” she croons. I wonder if I should even entertain her by looking up as I have the last three times, she has wandered out into the living room in outfits ranging from a thong – yes just that, a thong, a slinky dress that barely covered her ass, and a tee shirt and boxers from my dresser.

  “Hey,” she shouts when I don’t look up immediately.

  “Are you actaully ready this time?” I ask with laughter in my voice finally peering up. My eyes scanning her body taking her all in, she is so captivating and unknowing of her own beauty. Doing a small turnabout, so I can see the full package she has to offer – her honey blonde locks curled and framing her face but not taking away from the beautiful heart shaped pendent hanging from her neck resting just above the cream colored flowing tank top paired with the camel colored cardigan, and just right faded jeans frayed over the knee and camel colored boots to give her a boost in height. “Fuck, I am a lucky man,” I mutter standing and walking towards her.

  “Don’t you even think about it, Mister.” She smiles then pulls me towards her by my belt and kisses the corners of my smile and side steps with her bag and phone to the door. Once loaded into the Cayenne, the annoying pings begin again, but are soon replaced by the most beautiful sound – Hannah’s laughter.

  “What are you doing?” I inquire as I turn
onto the highway, but she just continues on giggling as her phone rings and she quickly answers it, mouthing “Brielle” to me and rolls her eyes.

  “Brie, why are you so worked up? It’s not as if I invited the fucking Taliban, I just invited Braydon. What’s the big deal? I figured giving you a little heads up would be nice of me; I just assumed you would have talked to him...?” Laughter is radiating in her voice as she spews out the words, but I remain quiet and try not to stew over why Braydon has been invited to Thanksgiving Dinner – or why I am just now finding out.

  “And...” Hannah laughs harder as she looks at me her face is red and she is rocking back and forth in her seat. What can possibly be going on? I hear Brielle screeching through the phone Hannah is now holding away from her ear.

  “Well this could make for an interesting dinner. Did you tell Chase that he was coming? ‘Cause I didn’t, I mean I only told you because I thought having you all wound up would be funny. A payback of sorts...” Hannah titters, even though looking over at her, she is back on the brink of a fully on belly laugh. “Brie just relax, it will be okay. I mean it’s just dinner; what’s the big deal unless you’ve been sneaking out on your current lover to see him?” Hannah all but finished the sentence before the laugh escaped her mouth.

  “Brie, calm your shit, I was only joking and you know it’s funny. This is going to be the best Thanksgiving Dinner EVER! See you soon, kay? Bye!” she practically laugh-shouts as she ends the call.

  “Han,” I smile, shaking my head, “what’s going on, and why have you invited everyone over?

  Slowly turning to me, she pops her shoulder a smiles tenderly realizing my uneasiness of the guest list. “I have a lot to be thankful for Carter Grayson, and everyone that I invited plays a role in that happiness. The happiness that I have accepted completely and wholly since you visited Florida through this morning. You don’t have to like it, but please try to support me, like we talked about last night, okay.” Her eyes are bright with love and purpose, so full of life like they use to be. She’s happy. This is my Hannah Grace.

  “Why is Brie flipping out?” I clear my throat, “I mean, no matter whether she did or did not hook up with Bray when we visited, I assumed she was single.” I glance over at the brown-eyed, cheeky woman arching her brow, as if questioning me for my inquiry, as I pull off the highway onto our exit ramp nearing her parents’ house.

  “She’s just Brie, don’t worry about it. Let’s just have a great day, like we used to,” she laughs softly and checks her cell as it beeps again, silencing it before placing it in her purse and laces her dainty fingers with mine.

  Bringing her hand to my lips, I place a kiss and smile as we pull into the James’ driveway. “If it makes you happy, I can give you that. It looks like the Sava’s and Chase started without us,” seeing Chase on the porch swing taking a pull from his beer and Brie chatting away with him, David, and Joel.

  Wow, it appears mom and dad had the wraparound porch refinished and stained this past summer; smiling bright, I squeeze Carter’s hand before unlacing our fingers and exiting the car. Just as I duck back out of the backseat with my bag containing a change of clothes for both Carter and myself, I meet my father’s eyes and smile. Hugging him in a tight embrace, he kisses the top of my head and walks me to the porch where my mother and Meredith have now joined everyone. After a round of hugs and a quick catching up, I shoot Carter a wink and head inside with the rest of the women.

  Once inside, I deposit my belongings onto the hope chest just inside the foyer after grabbing my cell and shoving it into my back pocket; I don my apron and wash my hands. Brielle has already pushed her mother, Meredith, to a bench stool on the opposite side of the island and began to prepare the stuffing, greenbean casserole, corn casserole, and a few other side dishes. My mom starts pressing the freshly made crust into several glass pie pans, and directs me to start the filling for the pies.

  “Mom, do we really need all these desserts?” I ask hesitantly. I mean seriously she has five crusts set out and ready for the pie fillings.

  “Hannah Grace, you invited all your friends over with very little planning notice, I would think you’d appreciate all the varieties to satisfy their preferences,” she says with an arched brow as she pours mimosas for us all and takes a seat with Meredith. I guess that means Brie and I are officially taking over the meal prep.

  “Yes boss,” I sigh and roll my eyes, “I did invite the Sava’s and the Jacobs’ as well as Chase and Braydon. I just want everyone that has affected my life together. I’m very thankful this year, especially, and wanted to share that with them.” Grabbing the canisters of sugar and flour, pecans, apples, and cheesecake ingredients, I turn back to her and take a sip of my orange bubbly. “Is that so bad?”

  “But the Jacobs’ are still out of down Han, I called Elaine just this morning,” my mom reminds me while taking dishes into the dining room to set up the table.

  “Han, I need you to forego the pie fillings and finishing the potatoes, so I can get them boiling and baking.” Brie states as she pushes my current task away and slide two bowls of potatoes in front of me.

  “Of course, chef,” I chuckle as I start peeling the russets and yams.

  After a few hours, we make our way into the family room passing through the formal dining room, which is now set to accommodate all of us for dinner. My cell beeps just as we all collapse into the plush leather sofas around the room triggering a loud sigh from me.

  Braydon – I think I’m here

  Me – kk, I’ll be right out, the guys are on the porch last I knew.

  Braydon – give C and me a few

  Just as I lifted the chilled bottle of Corona to my lips, a familiar grey, four door Silverado comes cruising down the drive.

  “Who the fuck invited him to the party?” David grumbled.

  “That’d be our girl, Sir.” I roll my eyes and stand, taking back the last of my beer and toss it in the barrel beside the stairs. “I’ll go welcome him,” I say without looking back making my way towards the truck before it even comes to a stop.

  As Braydon pulls up next to the garage, I see him texting someone but quickly looks up and hops out.

  “Hey man,” he says hesitantly, “thanks for having me.”

  “I didn’t, Hannah did.”

  “Well, okay,” he drawls out. “Can we at least make it cordial for her then?” I almost laughed at the palpable anger in his tone as he asked me. This fucker has to be fucking kidding me right now.

  “Can we? Sure, we can Braydon. Do me a favor first, man? Can you tell me why the FUCK you never found it necessary to tell me before? And don’t give me the bullshit of ‘I thought you knew’.” I seethed.

  “Why the fuck would I have told you? I was the only motherfucker you had; I was the only person you turned to,” his voice turning as malevolent as his eyes. “It was easier for me to take your hate indirectly day after day, knowing you weren’t gonna do something even more stupid on top of the two other massive fuckin mistakes I was living with.” My fists clinched and the words “two other” before he put up his hand and cut me off. “It’s bad enough knowing I destroyed them, man. Both of them.”

  Pivoting in frustration, I turn to head back to the house before stopping short when it hits me. He said ‘destroyed them’. The fuck? Turning abruptly, Braydon still standing where I left. His face more relaxed now, must be nice because I am still all sorts of pissed the fuck off.

  “So you did know Han lost the baby?” I accuse, glowering at the continual deceit. “Even though you just fuckin told her at my house you had no idea, are you fuckin kidding me? How about you figure out what goddamned story you want to tell, and tell it?”

  “Carter, I swear to fuck, you assume more than a little teenage bitch on the rag during gym class. FUCK, man. NO, but Hannah and I weren’t the only one’s involved in that accident.” He retorts back with a bite. Then mutters quietly when looking around me giving a nod to whoever is approaching, “I just thank, ye
t hate, God, that she didn’t remember any of it… not even me. But for what it’s worth Carter, I hope one day… one day I can somehow earn your forgiveness and friendship back. I’ve, we’ve both lost more than we should have at this point in our lives.”

  Getting back up to meet Braydon, after giving him and Carter a few moments to chat, I pass Chase in the hallway making his way into the kitchen. “Hey, keep those fingers out of the food Mr. Timmons. You can’t blame the indentions on Isaac today,” I playfully scold before pushing through the front door. The cool breeze gusts around me just as I step onto the porch, still loving that the temperature is uncharacteristically warm today.

  Crossing the porch, I cautiously make my way towards where Carter and Braydon are standing in stiff unwelcoming stances. I peek around Carter’s side and smile at Bray earning me a nod; better than nothing I guess, so forward on I go. Closing in on the two of them, I smile bright at Braydon’s words.

  “I hope one day… one day I can somehow earn your forgiveness and friendship back. I’ve, we’ve both lost more than we should have at this point in our lives.”” He says with sincerity coating every word.

  “Yeah, one day.” Carter repeats with a curt nod and wraps a possessive arm around my waist. I pop up on my tiptoes and kiss him quickly on the cheek wiggling away and bouncing back toward the house.

  “Alright boys, you all play nice, dinner will be ready in just a few minutes. Let’s go.” I chuckle as I make my way towards the front door the two of them following behind me in silence. Once I am inside, I shut the door leaving Carter and Braydon on the porch with my dad and Joel. Looking up, I see Chase pressed against Brie in the kitchen corridor all but dry humping.