The Great Greene Heist

by Varian Johnson

  “I’m speaking hypothetically.”

  “We can discuss all this tomorrow,” Jackson said. “Megan, don’t you owe someone a dance?”

  Megan hooked her arm through Hashemi’s. “Come on.”

  Hashemi’s eyes widened. “You want to dance? With me?”

  “No, with the other boy who knows how to translate Klingon.”

  As Megan led Hashemi onto the dance floor, Jackson asked Charlie, “Did you get a picture?”

  “Yeah, and it’s awesome.” Charlie launched the camera app, then handed the MAPE to Jackson. “It’ll look great on the front page of the Herald.”

  Jackson admired the photo, pressed a few buttons, then handed it back to Charlie. “It would, but it won’t.”

  Charlie looked at the blank screen. “What did you do?”

  “I deleted it.”

  “What?” Charlie, Gaby, and Bradley all said at the same time.

  “That was our only evidence,” Charlie said, pawing at the phone.

  “Kelsey thinks we have a photo. That’s all we need,” Jackson said. “And don’t break the MAPE. Hash just got it out of beta.”

  Charlie shook his head. “But … but …”

  “We beat him, Charlie. That’s good enough.”

  Gaby stepped toward this new boy in Jackson Greene’s old body. She took a deep breath. “So what about it, Mr. Greene? Are you going to ask me to dance or what?”

  Jackson pulled at his tie. “What … What about Omar?”

  “He left. Someone spilled punch all over his suit.”

  Bradley coughed. “My bad.”

  “You took out Omar?” Charlie high-fived Bradley. “Talk about removing the competition.”

  Gaby ignored Bradley and Charlie, her gaze fixed squarely on Jackson Greene. “I’m waiting.”

  “I … I …”

  “Dude,” Charlie said. “Just tell her.”

  “Shut up —”

  “You’re the one who said she was part of the crew. And don’t forget Rule Number Seventeen: Once you’re part of the crew, you have retroactive access to all past cons.”

  Jackson snorted. “There is no Rule Number Seventeen.”

  “I’m running point, remember. My rules, my call.” He turned to his sister. “Jackson doesn’t know how to dance.”

  Jackson took Gaby by the arm and led her away from Charlie and Bradley. If he was going to tell the truth, he wanted to tell her face-to-face, his eyes on her eyes, without an audience. “I wanted to ask you to the end-of-year formal, but I wanted to learn how to dance first. And since you’re so good at it, I wanted to learn from the best.” He offered her a small smile. “Dr. Kelsey had taken Katie’s phone. She needed it back, and I needed dance lessons. It sounded like a good idea at the time.”

  “That’s why you agreed to steal her phone?!”

  Jackson rubbed the back of his neck. “Samuel also said that running a con with Katie would make you jealous. It was supposed to make you like me more.”

  Gaby had a good mind to throw her bouquet in Jackson’s face. “Jackson Greene, I could slap you right now.”

  “If it makes you feel better, I never took those lessons.”

  “Wait — you kissed a girl you didn’t like, tried to make me jealous, and almost got kicked out of school — and you still didn’t learn how to dance?” She looked at the ceiling. “Why are boys so stupid?”

  “If we’re being technical — just to be clear — I didn’t really kiss —”

  “Jackson!”

  “Okay. I’m sorry for the whole deal with Katie. I’m sorry for never learning how to dance. I’m sorry for being a stupid boy. I’m even sorry for running up the score during the Blitz at the Fitz.” He took a step toward her. “Okay?”

  She planted her hands on her hips, but Jackson could already see the hint of a smile on her face. “You still broke the rules.”

  “Yeah, but it was only a small rule. I didn’t hijack the election process.”

  “You broke into the main office.”

  “Just to fix what Keith had already done.”

  “You were carrying a cell phone.”

  “Where?” He opened his jacket. “Last I checked, I didn’t have one on me.”

  She shook her head. “You really have all the answers, don’t you, Jackson Greene?” Gaby slipped the jacket off her shoulders. Then she poked Jackson’s chest. “My house. Tomorrow. Two o’clock.”

  He perked up. “Basketball?”

  “No. Merengue lessons. Plus, we’re going to help Mom make a batch of pasteles for dinner.”

  Jackson’s stomach grumbled. “I love your mom’s pasteles.”

  “I know.” She took his tie and tugged it to the left. “That’s why I asked her to cook them.”

  They stood there, silent, close enough to share the same breath. For a second, Jackson thought that maybe … that possibly … that perhaps there would be another public display of affection between him and Gabriela de la Cruz.

  But before anything could happen, Gaby waved Charlie and Bradley over to join them. She tossed Charlie his jacket and grabbed Bradley’s hand. “Let’s hit the dance floor.”

  “But what about Jackson?” Bradley asked.

  “There are some lessons that even the Infamous Jackson Greene has to learn the hard way.” As she dragged Bradley onto the floor, she called out over her shoulder, “See you tomorrow, Jackson. And you better not be late.”

  Jackson watched as Gaby fell in step with the music. Bradley struggled to keep up with the beat, always a half-step behind. But at least he was dancing.

  “Well, she didn’t slam the door in your face this time,” Charlie said. He eyed the original copy room key still in his hand. “What should we do with this key? Toss it?”

  “A better question is, what should we do with these keys?” Jackson reached into his jacket and pulled out a ring of keys that until recently had resided in Dr. Kelsey’s pocket. He picked through the keys until he found an oddly shaped silver one.

  “Is that —”

  “The key to Dr. Kelsey’s office? How did that get in my pocket?” Jackson shook the keys. “None of this would have happened if Kelsey hadn’t taken that bribe. I’m thinking it’s time for a little payback.”

  “You know he’ll change the locks first thing on Monday morning,” Charlie said.

  “Then it’s a good thing we have Sunday open, isn’t it?”

  And so the Infamous Jackson Greene and his partner, Charlie de la Cruz, exited the gymnasium, whispering in hushed tones, discussing a heist involving the hacking of a certain administrator’s computer to quadruple the budgets for the Botany Club, the Tech Club, the Herald staff, the Art Geeks, and the Student Council, all using funds from the school’s biggest booster. A heist that would somehow include the Honor Board receiving a Scantron machine for its own use. A heist more sophisticated, cunning, ingenious, and beautiful than any job they had ever pulled.

  Allegedly.

  * * *

  1) NO MATTER HOW SIMPLE A JOB LOOKS, ALWAYS PLAN BEFORE YOU ACT.

  2) STAY COOL UNDER PRESSURE. A RATTLED CREW IS A MISTAKE-PRONE CREW.

  3) NEVER CON FOR LOVE. OR EVEN LIKE.

  4) NEVER RAT. NO MATTER WHAT.

  5) FOCUS TODAY. GLOAT TOMORROW.

  6) KNOW WHEN TO WALK AWAY. IT’S BETTER TO LIVE AND FIGHT ANOTHER DAY.

  7) NEVER RESORT TO VIOLENCE, THREATS, OR BLACKMAIL. THEY’RE MESSY AND UNRELIABLE.

  8) NEVER CON FOR PURE REVENGE…. BUT IT’S OKAY TO GET IT ALONG THE WAY.

  9) ONLY SHARE THE PLANS OF A JOB WITH YOUR CREW. LOOSE LIPS SINK SHIPS.

  10) NEVER CON ANYONE WHO DOESN’T DESERVE TO BE CONNED. NEVER HURT INNOCENT BYSTANDERS.

  11) DON’T USE A BATTERING RAM WHEN A CROWBAR WILL DO.

  12) DO YOUR HOMEWORK. SECONDHAND RESEARCH YIELDS D-MINUS RESULTS.

  13) PRACTICE, PRACTICE, PRACTICE. THEN PRACTICE AGAIN.

  14) MAKE SURE IT’S WORTH IT.

  15) IF YOU’RE GOI
NG TO PULL A CON, KNOW HOW TO PULL A CON IN STYLE.

  * * *

  * * *

  * * *

  KOBAYASHI MARU (THE RIGGING OF THE NOT-A-SCANTRON MACHINE): First seen in Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan, the Kobayashi Maru is an exam administered to all command-track Starfleet cadets. Designed as a “no-win” scenario, the test is meant to gauge a cadet’s character and command capabilities. Cadet James T. Kirk beats the test by reprogramming the simulator, and is awarded a commendation for “original thinking.”

  CARRIE NATION (CARMEN CLEAVER): Carrie Nation was a radical leader of the temperance movement, the crusade to reduce or prohibit the consumption of alcohol in the late 1800s and early 1900s. Nation described herself as “a bulldog running along at the feet of Jesus, barking at what he doesn’t like,” and was notorious for using a hatchet to destroy saloon and bar property.

  ANAKIN SKYWALKER (VICTOR CHO): Jedi Knight Anakin Skywalker betrays the Jedi Order to save his wife from a prophesized death, though his betrayal actually leads to her passing. Skywalker embraces the dark side of the Force and becomes the Sith Lord Darth Vader, enemy of the Galactic Republic.

  WINDOWS VISTA (THE NEW NOT-A-SCANTRON MACHINE): Windows Vista is a computer operating system designed by Microsoft. Released in 2006, Vista was criticized for security and performance flaws. Many users downgraded to the previous operating system, Windows XP.

  DENNIS ECKERSLEY (MEGAN FELDMAN): A closer is a relief pitcher that specializes in getting the final outs of a baseball game, usually when the team is leading. Dennis Eckersley became a dominant closer in the latter half of his twenty-four-year Major League Baseball career. Credited with almost four hundred saves (preserving the lead at the end of a game), Eckersley was named to the Baseball Hall of Fame in 2004.

  WHITE RABBIT (MEGAN FELDMAN LEADING LINCOLN MILLER AWAY FROM THE COPY ROOM): In Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, the White Rabbit leads Alice down the rabbit hole into Wonderland.

  DENVER BOOT (THE SWITCHED LOCK THAT HOLDS KEITH IN PLACE): The Denver Boot is a wheel clamp used to prevent a car from being moved. They were given the nickname when the city of Denver began using them in the enforcement of parking tickets.

  FALLOUT SHELTER (THE COPY ROOM CLOSET): Designed mainly during the Cold War (1950s to 1991), fallout shelters were constructed to protect people from radiation resulting from a nuclear bomb.

  ROBOT IN DISGUISE (GABY’S BOUQUET): The bouquet was named in honor of the 1980s Saturday morning cartoon and toy line (and subsequent movies) Transformers, which are humanoid-shaped robots that “transform” into everyday vehicles. The cartoon theme song features the line, “Robots in disguise.”

  * * *

  * * *

  It takes a really large crew to pull off a caper novel.

  I am forever grateful for the guiding hand of my editor, Cheryl Klein, and the support and unwavering faith of my agent and friend, Sara Crowe. Thank you both for believing in me and Jackson Greene.

  I also owe a huge debt of gratitude to all my draft readers: Brian Yansky, April Lurie, Francis Yansky, Sean Petrie, Jess Leader, Ginger Johnson, Annemarie O’Brien, Sue LeNeve, Larissa Theule, Mary Winn Heider, Stephen Bramucci, Marianna Baer, Linden McNeilly, and Katie Bayerl. I’d like to thank Jeff Miller from Pop a Lock for technical guidance and Veronica Medina Addison for suggestions on grammatical content.

  A special thanks goes to Rachel Wilson, as her thoughts on omniscient POV opened the door for me to finish my first draft, and to Tim Wynne-Jones, for keeping me honest when the novel wasn’t working. I would also like to acknowledge the Vermont College of Fine Arts and the Austin, Texas, writing communities for their continued support and cheers.

  I am indebted to the entire Arthur A. Levine Books/Scholastic team: Arthur Levine, Emily Clement, Elizabeth Starr Baer, and Nina Goffi. You all don’t get nearly enough credit for the work you do.

  And to Crystal, Savannah, and the rest of my family, thank you for being patient and for letting me keep this little book a secret for so long. I promise it was worth the wait.

  VARIAN JOHNSON lists his inspirations for this book as Ocean’s 11, The Westing Game, Sneakers, The Thomas Crown Affair, and Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan. (He may or may not own a Lirpa.) The author of three previous novels for young adults, he lives with his wife and daughter near Austin, Texas. Please visit his website at www.varianjohnson.com.

  Copyright © 2014 by Varian Johnson

  All rights reserved. Published by Arthur A. Levine Books, an imprint of Scholastic Inc., Publishers since 1920. SCHOLASTIC and the LANTERN LOGO are trademarks and/or registered trademarks of Scholastic Inc.

  Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

  Johnson, Varian, author.

  The great Greene heist / by Varian Johnson. — First edition.

  pages cm

  Summary: Jackson Greene has a reputation as a prankster at Maplewood Middle School, but after the last disaster he is trying to go straight — but when it looks like Keith Sinclair may steal the election for school president from Jackson’s former best friend Gabriela, he assembles a team to make sure Keith does not succeed.

  ISBN 978-0-545-52552-7 (hardcover : alk. paper) — ISBN 0-545-52552-7 (hardcover : alk. paper) — ISBN 978-0-545-52553-4 (pbk. : alk. paper) — ISBN 0-545-52553-5 (pbk. : alk. paper) — ISBN 978-0-545-52554-1 (ebook) — ISBN 0-545-52554-3 (ebook) 1. Elections — Juvenile fiction. 2. Middle schools — Juvenile fiction. 3. Practical jokes — Juvenile fiction. 4. Best friends — Juvenile fiction. [1. Elections — Fiction. 2. Middle schools — Fiction. 3. Schools — Fiction. 4. Practical jokes — Fiction. 5. Best friends — Fiction. 6. Friendship — Fiction.] I. Title.

  PZ7.J63844Gr 2014

  813.6 — dc23

  2013029145

  First edition, June 2014

  Cover art © 2014 by Kali Ciesemier

  Cover design by Nina Goffi

  Author photo by Kenneth B. Gall

  e-ISBN 978-0-545-52554-1

  All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. No part of this publication may be reproduced, transmitted, downloaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereafter invented, without the express written permission of the publisher. For information regarding permission, write to Scholastic Inc., Attention: Permissions Department, 557 Broadway, New York, NY 10012.