by Leigh Fallon
Without him, we were in a holding pattern. We followed our old training schedule, standing in a circle with our fingers stretched to one another, channeling our power through our hands to the person on either side of us. The elements reflected each person’s strengths. It was strange to feel Áine’s sweet, pleasant essence hanging gently in the air beside Adam’s passionate one. Rían’s courage, intensity, and overwhelming sense of protection surrounded me. I wondered what my essence felt like to them.
With no one to watch us, we worked a little longer and harder, flexing the elements to their limits without releasing them. The session started out as normal, but when I began feeling overwhelmed, I opened my eyes and gasped. My body was hovering slightly off the ground as the wind enveloped me. Across the way, flames encircled Rían, and I could see he was clenching his teeth, a deep frown etched into his brow. On my right, Áine’s normally poker-straight, shoulder-length hair was caught in a static web as the nearby grass and roots grew at an amazing pace and wrapped themselves around her. Tears were falling down her pale cheeks. I dared to glance over at Adam. He too stood still, a mass of swirling clouds snaking around him. His eyes were clamped shut, and pain was engraved into his face. Why was this affecting them so?
My eyes widened as the other elements suddenly took on form and came swirling toward me, like earlier when Adam’s element and mine had combined to create a molten body. Now I watched as water, fire, and earth merged into an intricate network of glowing ribbons of energy, undulating through the air. They were about to merge!
I gasped in horror. “Adam, we’ve got to stop! They’re merging. We’ve gone too far!”
Adam looked at me, his eyes unfocused, glowing black and swirling blue. “What?”
“Don’t you see them?”
“See what?” he asked, looking confused.
“The elements!” I pulled back, away from the radiant, viscous powers.
Adam broke the circle and faced me. With a strange mix of relief and loss, I watched all the elemental powers retract and recoil back to their owners.
I dropped my arms to my side and pulled my element deep into its hiding place inside my chest. With the bond severed, Áine collapsed to the ground. Rían stumbled forward with a groan, and Adam wavered where he stood.
“Did you guys see that?” I gasped.
Áine shook her head. “See what? I was too busy trying to stay conscious. Are you not whacked?”
I moved over to Adam, who still wobbled on his feet. “No, I feel fine.” I wrapped my arms around Adam and encouraged him to lean onto me. “The elements took form, real form. They . . . they were coming after me.”
“Yeah, even the elements find you irresistible.” Rían laughed from where he sat cross-legged on the grass.
“Shut up, Rían!” Adam said with a slight edge. “Don’t worry, Megan. The alignment must affect everyone differently. This is probably only a taste of what’s to come.” He finally gave up and folded down onto the grass.
Áine’s head popped up. “Way to go with your inspirational speeches, Adam. I can’t wait.”
“Yay,” Rían muttered, and flopped back onto the grass.
I sat down beside Adam as they all recovered, guilt eating at me for feeling so vital and empowered.
Adam dropped his head into my lap. “How do you do that?”
“Do what?”
“Stay strong. Look at us.” He motioned toward Rían and Áine, slumped on the grass. “Why isn’t this affecting you?”
“I don’t know,” I said, chewing on my bottom lip. “I wish I did. Maybe during the real thing it won’t be like that.”
Twenty minutes later, they started to come around. Rían was first to recover. He stood up. “Want to try something that sucks a little less?”
Adam lifted his head. “That depends.”
“Hang on a sec.” Rían disappeared into the house and came back with Chloe in tow. “Chloe’s been showing me other ways we can use the elements.”
I felt the usual wave of betrayal wash over me as she drew closer. “She’s not allowed here while we practice.”
Rían held up a hand. “This isn’t about alignment practice.”
“What do you mean?” Áine asked.
“Watch this,” he said, laughing. He pulled his sweater over his head, revealing a taut stomach.
I quickly averted my eyes.
Rían winked at Chloe. “Go easy on me—I’m still wiped out from practice.” They started sparring. Chloe moved fast, throwing a flying kick at Rían’s chest. He blocked it with a quick swipe of his arm—not with his actual arm but with fire that mimicked his movement. Next Chloe came at him with a right hook. Again, Rían blocked it with a ball of fire, as if it were solid and not flame without form.
“Ouch!” Chloe fell to her knees and cradled her hand to her chest.
“Oh shit, sorry, Chloe.” Rían ran and dropped beside her, but before he could inspect her hand, a flicker of a smile crossed Chloe’s face. In the next instant, she kicked her leg out under his, and he landed on his backside. She straddled him with her knees on either side of his face and held his arms above his head.
“Gotcha!” she exclaimed, grinning down at him.
Rían smiled. “You sure do.”
Adam groaned.
“Pretty cool, huh?” Rían said, sitting up as Chloe rolled off him.
“How did you make it a solid, so it didn’t burn her?” Áine clambered over to Chloe and inspected her hands. “She hasn’t a mark!”
Rían’s face lit up. “It’s all about realizing the element is power. We control that power, so we can dictate the physical form it takes. You just have to want it bad enough.”
“Chloe, hit me!” Áine ordered, dancing from foot to foot.
“Whoa there, Rocky, I’m not going to hit you.” Chloe laughed, getting up from the ground.
“Rían, you hit me, then,” Áine demanded.
“You want me to hit you?”
“Yes! Go on. Hit me!”
“Promise not to sic your rabid mutt on me?”
“Just do it!” Áine said, crouched and ready to spring.
Rían lightly punched her on the arm.
“Ow! That hurt,” she squealed.
“Well, you told me to.”
“Yeah, but I thought I’d be able to stop you.”
“It takes practice.” Rían smirked and glanced over at Chloe.
“Fionn will freak if he finds out you’ve been using the elements like this,” Adam snapped.
“We should be prepared to defend ourselves. And what better way than with our elements?”
“But we’re not allowed,” Adam continued.
Rían shrugged. “We’re all breaking the rules anyway. You and Megan, me and Chloe.”
“Hey, I’m not breaking any rules!” Áine said, sticking her nose in the air.
“Need I remind you that you have a smuggled fox cub by the name of Sven living in your bedroom? Oh, and the fact that you’ve been screwing with people’s heads?” Rían said, raising an eyebrow.
“No,” Áine muttered, crossing her arms.
“We’ve all broken so many rules—why not a few more? It makes sense to be able to defend ourselves.”
Adam nodded. “I guess you have a point.”
Chloe stepped forward. “I can give you the technique, and you can hone your skills.”
I glared at Chloe. I still didn’t understand how Rían could forgive her for lying. “Isn’t that what you’re here for, Chloe? To protect us?”
She looked at me with guarded eyes. “I can’t be with you all round the clock. A time will come when you’ll need to defend yourselves. You should start now.”
“Count me out. I want no part of this.” I turned on my heel and started back toward the house.
Nineteen
SECRETS
On Saturday, Adam and I went for an early-morning walk on the beach. Everything that had happened over the past two weeks had left me feeling l
ike the world was caving in on me, like the walls were edging closer, leaving me with little air to breathe. Now the fresh sea air really cleared my head. By the time we got back to the DeRíses’, I was feeling good.
Áine was on her way out as we came in.
“Where are you off to?” Adam asked.
“Down to the town to do a smidgen of training.” She winked and tapped the side of her head. “Seb’s mind is growing resistant, and none of you will let me practice on you.”
Adam exhaled heavily. “You can’t just randomly pick strangers and mess with their brains. You know how it affects people.”
She looked slightly deflated. “This is the coolest thing that’s ever happened to me. I just want to . . . flex it a bit.”
I reached out and grabbed her hand as she was leaving, surprised to find myself enjoying the fizzing sensation that used to feel uncomfortable. “Áine, it’s not right.”
She shrugged. “I’ll be gentle, I promise. I’m getting better.”
I glanced down and tried to pry my fingers open, but couldn’t.
“And you say I’m weird!” Áine muttered, pulling her hand out of mine. She walked into the courtyard, where Randel soared above her in the wispy low-lying clouds of the damp morning.
“Fionn will have to rein her in,” Adam said, heading into the kitchen. “She’s too cavalier about the whole thing.”
We each grabbed a coffee and went to hang out in his room. Shrieking laughter came from the next bedroom.
I scrunched up my face. “Let’s go downstairs. I’m not listening to that.”
“No! With Sebastian and Matthew lurking constantly, this is the only private place I have. I’m not being driven out of my own room by Chloe and Rían’s antics.” Adam scowled and banged on the wall. “I can’t wait for Fionn to get home. They’ve been at it like rabbits since yesterday.”
The noise died down, followed by some giggling. I did my best to ignore it, but hatred for Chloe washed over me. Unlike the others, I couldn’t get over her betrayal. But deep down under the layers of my disapproval, I knew that jealousy fed my dislike of her. Because she had Rían. And I hated myself for feeling that way.
Adam chatted away like nothing was going on, but I couldn’t focus on what he was saying. Next door, Chloe shrieked again and the muffles got louder. I drained my cup, scorching my throat in an attempt to finish it. “I’m going to get another coffee—want one?”
Adam went to stand. “I’ll go.”
I stopped him. “No! I’ll get them.”
Adam’s eyes slid to the hideous orange-flowered wallpaper that divided his room from the debauchery going on next door, and he smiled wryly. “Sure, okay.”
Downstairs, I flicked the kettle on, thankful to be away from the torturous sounds of Chloe and Rían. I glanced down at the papers on the counter. They were Hugh’s instructions for the alignment training, written in his round, tidy script, complete with diagrams. I reached out to pick them up and knocked Adam’s coffee cup over in the process, spilling the remains all over them.
“Oh crap!” I grabbed the notes and tried to shake the liquid off, but it didn’t work. They were stained and soggy. I just had to hope they’d be legible when they were dry. Very carefully, I peeled away each page and lined them up on the counter where the sun streamed in. Then some unfamiliar scribbles written faintly across one of the pages caught my eye. I picked it up and held it to the sun. Behind Hugh’s neat, round writing was more text indented into the thick paper. The coffee had been absorbed into the letters, but not so much where it was indented, making the older writing stand out when held against the light. The words “Ciorcal na Fírinne” jumped from the page. I didn’t speak Irish but had heard enough around school. “Ciorcal” was circle. What did “na Fírinne” mean? There were symbols too, curling Celtic circles, and other words I couldn’t make out. I turned the page over and could almost make out a ten-digit number on the other side. Before anything else could go wrong, I grabbed a pen and wrote down the numbers and words that were legible. “Ciorcal” kept haunting me. Hugh had said those words when I’d absorbed some of Rían’s element. The night he’d walked out. I was sure I’d seen it somewhere else too. It had to all be connected.
Adam walked into the kitchen and found me peering at the backs of coffee-stained sheets of paper. “So what’s on those pages that is more interesting than your boyfriend lying on his bed waiting for you?”
“Look,” I said, pointing to the word “Ciorcal.”
Adam squinted at the page. “I just see Hugh’s handwriting.”
“No, beneath it. Look at the indentations.” I ran my finger along the line.
“Ciorcal na Fírinne,” Adam said in beautiful-sounding Irish. “Circle of Truth.”
“What’s the Circle of Truth?”
He frowned. “I have no idea. Here, let me see that.” Adam took the pages and held them out in front of him, allowing the sun to shine through. “This is hard to make out, but I see ‘imolán.’ I think that means ‘whole’ or ‘full.’”
“Do you think this has something to do with what Hugh was going on about?”
“It could be.”
“There’s more. If you look at it from behind, you can just make out what looks like a cell number.”
Adam sat down on the bench behind him, squinting at the page. “The Circle of Truth. That sort of sounds like . . . hang on a sec.” He ran out of the kitchen and was back two minutes later, carrying one of the books from Fionn’s study. “Do you see that symbol there, the three curling swirls?” He pointed to what looked like some casual scribble of Hugh’s. “Look at this.” He opened the book and flipped through the pages until he found what he was looking for. “The two gifts from Danu! The Amulet of Accaious and the Cup of Truth. Look at the engraving on the cup!”
I peered closer at the picture in the book, then back at Hugh’s drawings. They were the same markings. “What do the Cup of Truth and Circle of Truth have to do with each other?”
“I wonder if we’ll find out when we call that mobile,” Adam said, tapping the number I’d scrawled down. “Go get Rían—he needs to see this.”
My legs like lead, I climbed the stairs and paused for a brief moment outside Rían’s room before lightly knocking. The laughter inside came to an abrupt stop, followed by a thud, then footsteps.
The door opened a few inches, and Rían’s face appeared. “What’s up?”
Trying to focus on the door frame, I cleared my throat. “Adam wants you downstairs. We found something you need to see.”
Rían swung the door wide. “What is it?”
I could barely think, let alone form words, as Rían grabbed his jeans and pulled them up over his boxers. “Are you all right?” he asked, putting a gentle hand on my arm as he passed by.
“I’m fine,” I mumbled.
Rían made his way down the stairs, but not before glancing at me curiously. As soon as he was gone, I slumped against the banister and banged the back of my head on the wall. I had to get a grip.
“He feels the same, you know.” Chloe’s voice came from the room.
Crap. I turned around to face her. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Yes, you do.” She pulled on a sweater and tied up her tussled hair. “I know you hate me. I can live with that. But what I can’t deal with is knowing that the guy I’m with wishes he was with someone else.”
I swallowed hard, not knowing what to say.
“I see the look in your eye when Rían’s around. I know what you’re thinking. I certainly know what he’s thinking when he sees you.”
“Chloe, I don’t hate you. I . . . I just, I find it hard to forgive you.”
“And it has nothing to do with the fact that Rían and I are together?” She walked right up to me, her face too close for comfort.
I dropped my gaze.
“Thought as much.”
“It’s not like that, Chloe. Rían and I are attracted to each other, but i
t’s our elements. Their pull is incredibly hard to resist. But we’re trying.”
She stepped closer and lined her mouth up with my ear. “Don’t take him away from me.”
I drew a sharp breath, staggered that Chloe thought I was capable of doing something so horrific. “I love Adam. I would never . . . anyway, I didn’t think you even cared.”
She shook her head. “I care, way more than I should. You can’t imagine the ache in my heart when he wakes up in the morning and rolls over to hug me, only to look disappointed.”
I softened a little, but I couldn’t bring myself to offer her comfort. “You chose the Knights over Rían.”
“I made that choice because of how I feel for Rían. You’ve no idea of the obligations I’m under. I have to see this through; it’s the only way.”
“We all have choices to make. If you really cared for him, you would have picked him.”
She laughed sadly. “You don’t get it. We don’t have choices, Megan. You, me, Rían, all of us, our choices are made for us. We’re following a path that’s already been plotted out. You still believe they’re your decisions, but you’ll learn.”
Her eyes searched mine for a moment before she brushed past and stood at the top of the stairs. “Look, I don’t need you to forgive me, or be my friend, but please, leave me him.” She trundled down the stairs without looking back.
My heart ached for the girl who loved the boy, and the boy caught in the confusion, but she’d stirred something else in my heart. Doubt.
In the kitchen, Adam and Rían had stuck the pages to the windows. Avoiding Rían’s bare torso, I went to the other side of Adam. “Where’s Chloe?”
Rían stared at the pages. “She’s gone to get Áine and Sebastian. We’ve got to ring this number.”