Restraint (Heaven Hill Generations Book 5)
Page 11
She’s the only person I’ve ever wanted at my side day and night, and this morning? It’s the whole package.
Her alarm is going off, and I expect her to snooze it, but she surprises me, by getting up at the first beep. Reaching out, I grab her around the waist, holding her back where I wish I were still asleep.
“Good morning.” I nuzzle her neck, kissing her softly.
“Good morning to you too.” The happiness is apparent in her voice as well as the smile I can barely see when I lift my mouth from her. “You can sleep if you want, I can get Joanie out and get ready. I’ll wake you up right before I need to leave.”
“Nah, I’m used to getting up just as early as you. Remember? I have a seriously fucked up sleep schedule from being in the club for so long.”
“Speaking of.” She bites her bottom lip. “Are you in trouble? You’ve been neglecting a lot to spend time with me, and I don’t want you get on my dad’s bad side.”
I don’t want to get there either, and she’s right. I’ve pushed off some things I probably shouldn’t have, but this, it’s where I’ve wanted to be for most of my life and I’m not willing to give up on it so easily. “We’ll work it out, Jus.”
“I know how my dad can be.”
“Things are fine, I promise. If you need to worry, I’ll let you know. But until then, let me do the worrying.”
“I trust you, and I trust you know best, so I’ll let it go for now, but please keep me informed.”
“C’mon, let’s go check on the little family in the living room.”
We creep in there like we’re sneaking up on a baby in a crib. The light is coming in softly from the blinds and we left one of the lamps on for them. Joanie is sleeping cuddled around her babies, and I don’t have the heart to wake them. Both Justice and I try to be quiet, but Joanie lifts her head, whining softly.
“You don’t have to get up, mama,” Justice speaks softly and lovingly to her, kissing the top of her head. “You rest. You’re safe here.”
Almost as if she understands what she’s been told, she does just that. Putting her head back down next to her babies and closes her eyes. When I look over at her, I swear, if dog’s could smile, there’s a small one on her face.
Chapter Twenty
Caelin
“If you have to end up doing something this afternoon and can’t pick me up, it’s fine. I can get my mom or Mandy to take me home. There’s a whole network of people I can call.”
“No one is taking you home but me,” I growl as I come to a stop in front of the law office. We’ve been halfway arguing about this the entire way here. “I get you don’t want to take away from what I’m doing, but you’re important, and I want to be the person you count on, Justice.”
“I do.” She grips my white t-shirt in between her thumb and forefinger, tugging on it slightly. “But at the same time, I don’t want to take over your life. It’s too soon.”
Grabbing her hand, I stop her tugging on my shirt and use my other hand to tilt her chin up to me. “Please take over my life. I don’t think you realize how in I am with you.”
“The club...”
“Is the club, but you’re my whole fuckin’ heart.” I lift her hand to my heart, pressing it into my skin.
Pleasure at my words rises up to her cheeks in the form of a pretty pink blush. My favorite thing is when I can make her physically react to what I tell her. Scooting in, I take a kiss, trying not to let it get too out of hand since we’re in front of her mom’s office. We pull apart and my chest tightens when she reaches up to press her lips against my fingers.
“My lipstick…” she trails off. “Are you going to go home at lunch to check on the pups?”
“Of course, and don’t worry, I’ll text you an update.”
“Pictures too.”
I’m stupidly happy at her request, pleased that she’s taken to them the same way I have. It’s not what I expected, but it’s what I hoped for. The more we spend time together, the more I feel positive about Justice being the one for me all along. “I gotta get headed to the clubhouse. I’m updating security systems today,” I explain.
“See you this afternoon? Do I need to send you a text to remind you what time I’m off work?”
My eyes roll of their own accord. “No, I think I’ve got that since I’ve spent so many years studying everything about you.”
She giggles. “Okay then, see you later. Don’t forget pictures.” She hops out of the shop truck. When I’m at the clubhouse today, I’ll have to get my own truck that I store in the garages there. “And don’t forget to make vet appointments, or do I need to do it?”
There’s the one thing I forgot. “Shit. I actually did forget, can you do that for me?”
“No problem. I’ll text you all the info.”
“Be careful.” I reach across the bench seat, grab her hand, and pull her back into the cab of the truck again, stealing one last kiss.
“You too.” She shoots me a wink, this time closing the door, and looks both ways before crossing the street.
I watch, making sure she gets into the office okay before I pull out of the side-street parking and head north toward the clubhouse. This time feeling lighter and more in control of myself than I think I ever have.
Justice
“Did you have fun with Harley last night?” Mom asks as I walk into the office. She’s sitting with Mandy, going over some folders.
“It looked like she got out of the shop truck, and maybe a hottie by the name of Caelin was driving.” Mandy gives me a scandalized grin.
“God, the two of you need to get out more,” I laugh. “But to answer your questions, I did have fun with Harley last night, but she couldn’t hang. She fell asleep on me. That’s when Caelin texted me that he found a dog and her puppies behind a dumpster and I was on board with helping him take care of them. They’re so cute!” I pull my phone out of my purse and show them the pictures we took last night.
“Whose apartment is that?” Mom asks, her eyebrow raised.
Shit, now I’m not sure what I should say, but I’ve never really lied to her. Since what happened to me, if I’m asked a direct question, I do my best to give an honest answer.
“Caelin’s, but it’s his business. It’s not my place to talk about.”
“Interesting.” She purses her lips. “So you spent the night with him at his apartment? How was it?”
“Not like what you’re thinking. We literally spent the entire night taking care of this dog and her puppies until bedtime.”
“Bedtime is what I want to know about,” Mandy interrupts. “Like is he as hot as I imagine? I know I’m too old to be asking this, but we’re all wondering it, right?”
“No.” I tilt my head to the side. “Some of us aren’t wondering, because some of us actually know.”
“You bitch,” she teases.
“Be nice, or I’ll tell your husband you’re lusting after my boyfriend.”
It’s the first time I’ve said those words out loud. It sends a thrill down to my stomach, and a burst of happiness into my soul. I wonder if given the chance, would he call me his girlfriend? It’s something I’ll ask when we’re alone together.
“Oh trust me, he knows. It’s our little secret and a joke between the two of us. But seriously, happiness looks good on you.”
“Mmm hmm,” Mom agrees. “I don’t know when you’ve ever looked so at peace before.”
I don’t want to hurt her feelings by saying it was well before the Travis incident. It was, though. After that my sense of peace shattered and I tried desperately to grab hold of anything that would allow me to feel safe again. Most of the time, it was only when I was around Caelin, or the club as a whole. Now, knowing he’s mine and he isn’t going anywhere, it’s given me a calm I’ve never had before. I’ll hold onto it with both hands and dig my heels into the ground if anyone tries to take it from me. “I’m doing really good,” I assure them, hoping I don’t have to go any further into what’s
happening between Caelin and I.
“Just make sure he treats you well.” Mom gets up from her seat, straightening her skirt out. “And please, wrap it up. I’m too young to be a grandmother.”
Mandy snorts, spitting water onto her desk.
“Oh my God, Mom.”
“What? I’m serious, and your dad is way too hot to be a grandfather. Just be smart, that’s all I’m asking.”
“Maybe you should be talking to Harley instead of me,” I mumble before having a seat and getting signed in to get ready for the day.
The first thing I do is a search for vets, looking at reviews on the internet, and trying to see how far their first appointments are booking by looking at online calendars. Badly, I want to make the best decision for the new little family I’ve been entrusted with, but it’s hard. The same amount of people have had both good and bad experiences with different offices, but as I continue to look through them, I decide I have to trust what’s never steered me wrong.
Decide with my heart and gut.
When I finally find one that gives me a good feeling, I put their number into the office phone and wait for the call to be answered.
“Hi, my name is Justice…”
I imagine I sound the way a new mother does when she’s making her first appointment for her baby. I’m scared to death as I answer a bunch of the questions they ask with an I don’t know since we truly don’t know her history. I mention Caelin bringing her in, and I’m taken aback when the receptionist makes an assumption.
“We’ll go ahead and put your husband on the account too.”
Even though I know I should, I don’t correct her. Hearing those words sounds more right than I care to admit, and as I hang up the phone, an appointment made, I imagine what it would be like for it to be true.
Glancing down at my left hand, I can almost see the two rings that would sit there. Or maybe he’d be like his parents and not need a ring.
Either way, with the idea planted in my head, I do my best to get to work and keep my daydreams at bay.
Chapter Twenty-One
Justice
My phone buzzes, the noise being louder than normal as it’s sitting on my desk. I hadn’t wanted to miss when Caelin might call or text. Flipping it over, I see that I have a text from him.
“Oh my gosh!”
When I open the text, it’s a picture of the puppies all happily cuddled up, with Caelin laying on the floor, Joanie’s head in the crook of his arm. It’s the cutest thing I’ve ever seen. Both my mom and Mandy rush to my side.
“How hot is that?” Mandy grins.
“Would you stop.” I smack her. “You’re starting to give me a complex.”
“I was wondering when you were finally going to get sick of me ogling your man and stand up for yourself.”
Her words give me pause. Is that what everyone is waiting on me to do? With everything in my life? Are they purposely trying to get a reaction out of me? In some ways I can definitely see it. Especially with them telling me to be careful and not telling Harley. I wonder if there are other pieces of it I’ve ignored. I vow to myself I won’t let it happen again.
“By the way,” - I look over at my mom - “I’m gonna be late tomorrow, we have an appointment for Joanie.”
“The mother? You named her for Doc Jones?” She puts a hand to her chest when I nod, obviously as emotional as we had been.
“Yeah, it only seemed right.”
“I wish she were here to see how far you’ve come, Jus.”
“She can.” I squeeze her hand. I firmly believe in life after death, and the fact that most of the people we care about the most are still around. Even if we can’t see them with our two eyes. “I feel her all the time.”
Neither one of them say anything to that statement, and I don’t expect them to. Not everyone understands, but I do, and it’s why I know Caelin and I are meant to be together.
“I’m going to grab a lemonade,” Mandy says as she walks over to her desk, getting her purse. “Anybody else want anything?”
“No thanks, I have to go over to the courthouse. The portal’s down again.”
“I’m good.” Mom waves away Mandy before turning to me. “What do we pay them for?” She blows out a breath, crossing her arms over her chest. “It’s down more than it’s up.”
“I guess the exercise?” I joke.
“Glad it’s you and not me, kiddo.”
Mandy leaves. The two of us are truly alone for the first time in a while.
“I miss you, Jus.” She has a seat in front of my desk. “I miss both of you, but you’ve always been my girl.”
Neither Harley nor I take offense to that when either of our parents say it to us. We understand, and even feel the same way.
“I miss you too, but I’d be lying if I didn’t admit to how much fun I’m having.”
“Oh I remember very well.” A look of nostalgia crosses her face. “I was mourning the loss of the relationship with your dad, but when I got to North Carolina, I was ready to mingle. I wanted anything and everything to take away the loneliness I felt with not knowing where the hell I was, or anyone in the town. I partied way more than I should have.”
“But it looks like you came out on the other side fairly well.”
“I did.” That far off look stays in her eyes. “But there were days when I wasn’t sure if I would. So many of them I wanted to say fuck the scholarship and go back to everything I knew. Drew was my home.”
“That’s how I feel about Caelin,” I admit softly. “It’s scary because I’ve wanted it for so long, and now it’s like I have it.”
“It’s not going to be snatched away from you.”
How does she seem to know everything I think? She always has, and I pray she always will. Although she may not be the first person I call now, I still want her to be that important influence. “Are you sure? Because it kind of always feels like when things are going good, there’s a black cloud around.”
“Life is that way. There’s something there all the time that wants to knock you down. There will always be someone who doesn’t want to see you succeed, or they’ll want to fuck up what’s going great. The most important thing is to just keep going. If you don’t stop, if they don’t mess up your forward momentum, you’ve got it made.”
I still want to question all of this, but this is the woman who's never lied to me. Not when she can help it. “I love you, Mom.”
“Love you too.” She reaches over, hugging me tightly. “Now go get some work done. I’ll have plenty more for you when you get back.”
Laughing, I get up, grabbing my bag stuffed with briefs and papers to file. “At some point I wondered if you were manufacturing me a job, but now? I definitely see that I’m needed.”
“Oh, you have no idea how much time you’re saving me, and while we’re being honest, you’re way better at this job than Mandy or Tatum ever were.”
Those words give me a feeling of pride I don’t think I’ve ever had. Probably the same way Harley feels when she figures out an issue at the shop. Both of us have always been taught to work for what we want, and to know we’re actually making a difference? It’s more than I could ask for.
It’s hot as I step out of the office and onto the sidewalk. Not as hot as early July, but the humidity is still hanging around. So much so that my hair immediately curls. So much for spending time on it this morning. Instead of fighting with it, I reach down for the hair tie I wear around my wrist and put it up off my neck.
Coming to a stop at the crosswalk, I see a large presence of police at the Sheriff’s office. Way more than is normally there. If I’m not mistaken, I even see a few FBI cars, which they think are unmarked, but anyone in my position can see them from a mile away. The light changes, allowing me to cross the street.
Taking the steps to the courthouse two at a time, I see Fogel with his mouth set in a firm line. I don’t think I’ve ever not seen him with a smile.
“What the fuck is happe
ning over there?” I ask, gesturing to the Sheriff’s office.
“A lot of no good. Nothing to do with your family, so don’t worry. Shouldn’t have told you that, but I like and respect you, Justice.”
“Thank you.” I reach out, rubbing his shoulder. “I appreciate it more than I can tell you.”
“Lotta shit potentially happening in town tonight. If I were you, I’d get your stuff done, get home, and stay there.”
Worry my lip between my teeth, I groan. “I have stuff to do with Caelin tonight before I go home.”
“Stay with him. For the next few nights. Nothing good is going to happen with all this law enforcement in town. I have an idea of who they’re after, but I’m not sure they’ll catch him, and nobody wants to get caught in the middle.”
Looking into his green eyes, I can see the honesty. He’s never steered me wrong, even when he maybe should have. If it’s this serious, I’ll take his word for it. “Okay.”
“Go on up there, get your shit done, and get on outta town.”
When I get on the elevator, I fumble with my phone, texting Caelin to let him know what Fogel’s told me.
C: I’ve seen nothing that suggests we’re on anybody’s radar, or anyone we typically hang around with. I wonder what the fuck is happening?
J: I don’t know, but when you come pick me up, you’ll be able to see the amount of cars here. They aren’t playing around.
C: I’ll call Rooster and see if he can get us an in. Be safe, okay?
J: You too. See you in a couple hours.
C: Ya know what? I’m gonna tell your dad what you’ve told me. Let me know when you’re done at the courthouse. I’ll be there to get you, and I’m sure the other guys will be there to get their women as well.
His woman. It’s so chauvinistic, but I fucking love it. Probably sets the women's movement back fifty years, but to see his concern for me totally outweighs clutching my pearls.
J: Okay, I’ll get this done as soon as I can and text you. It may take at least an hour though, I have a ton of stuff to pull.