Crazy For You

by Alexander, S. B.

  I believed Colton had helped me by occupying every waking thought I’d had since he returned home from the academy. I believed he was the reason I hadn’t stressed over Dad as much as I had before school started.

  I got out on shaky legs and waited until Nan backed out before I started toward Colton. When I did, my legs quivered, feeling heavy with each step I took. My stomach fisted into a knot that grew tighter the closer I got to him. I wondered if he remembered that I’d told him I loved him. But that wasn’t the topic I wanted to start with.

  I waved tentatively as I settled on the bottom step.

  Seconds, minutes, hours seemed to tick by. Then ever so slowly, he unfolded his muscular frame and climbed down the steps until we were barely an inch apart.

  I sucked in the warm night air along with his clean, soapy scent, and I almost whimpered.

  “Hi.” His Southern drawl caused my skin to tingle. “Grady told me about your dad. I’m sorry for your loss.”

  My bottom lip started to wobble. Instead of saying thank you, I wrapped my arms around his waist and pressed my ear against his chest. It didn’t matter that I hadn’t heard from him in a week. It didn’t matter that he’d made himself a ghost. What mattered was that he was with me then, and he’d come at the perfect time. I wouldn’t have paid much attention to Colton with Dad in a coma, anyway.

  He held me to him as though he needed me as much as I needed him. I couldn’t help but think of what Nan had just told me about channeling my pain.

  He rested his chin on top of my head as he rubbed my back. “I wanted to be there with you this week, but I had to take care of my parents.”

  I stiffened.

  “My mom checked my old man into a rehab center in South Carolina this week. I was just getting back into town when Grady sent me the text.”

  I craned my neck up at him. “Where’s your mom?”

  “She’s staying with a friend in Charleston, not far from the rehab center, for a few days.”

  My shoulders sagged, relieved that his parents were okay. “Why do you look like you lost your best friend?”

  “I’m just tired, Skyler. And I’m kicking myself for not being here for you. I told you I wouldn’t leave until you were okay.”

  Oh my word. He blamed himself for his brother’s death and endured punch after punch from his father, yet he was worried about me. “Hey, stop that. Your parents come first. It’s great your dad is getting help. And your mom needed you. Plus I’m a tiny bit better now that you’re here.”

  His lips split into a thigh-squeezing grin. “Just a tiny bit?”

  I batted my lashes, ropes of pleasure spiraling downward. “Maybe a lot.”

  He chuckled, a sound that was glorious and only heightened my desire to give him my most precious virtue.

  “You should laugh more, Colton.”

  His lips feathered over mine. “I plan to, and only if you’re with me.”

  I was definitely not going anywhere. “Wait, aren’t you staying with your friend in Virginia?”

  “Not anymore. My mom is giving me some space this week, and she’s convinced me to finish school here.”

  Maybe I had an angel watching over me. Maybe that angel was Dad. “That’s great news.”

  “Yeah?” he asked, fixated on my lips.

  “You can kiss me.” If he doesn’t, I might combust.

  “Not yet, Skyler.”

  My forehead creased. I knew he wanted me and wondered what had changed. “I don’t care about your control.”

  “It’s not about that.”

  “Are you afraid, then?” That didn’t make sense, either. Colton didn’t strike me as the type of guy who was afraid of anything.

  He backed far away. “Not afraid in the least, but you need to process your dad’s death. I’m not about to take advantage of your emotions.”

  As sweet and considerate as he was, I needed something or someone to take my mind away from Dad, to take away the pain and numbness, to hold me and tell me everything would be okay.

  But Colton wasn’t a distraction. He was the love of my life. “I’m in love with you, Colton.” Life was too short to mince words. The two people I loved the most were gone. I wasn’t about to lose him too.

  I could see his mind working hard, as if trying to find the next thing to say.

  “You could never take advantage of me or my emotions. Not when I want you,” I added.

  He rushed toward me, captured my face in his hands, and kissed me like I was the only one who could give him his next breath.

  The ground seemed to shake beneath me as his tongue dove into my mouth, insistently and possessively. I gripped his arms, hoping I didn’t pass out from the sheer passion that was pouring out of him. If I’d been unsure of how he felt before, I wasn’t anymore.

  “Fuck, Skyler.” He toyed with my bottom lip. “I have to stop. If I don’t, we won’t come up for air.”

  “Who needs air?” He was the conduit to breathing life back into me, the person who I had no doubt could dim the anguish and suffering gripping me.

  Our gazes tangled for a split second before I jumped into his arms.

  He caught me, grabbing my butt as I locked my fingers around his neck. Then it was my turn to show him how much I wanted him.

  “I’m crazy for you, Skyler.” The husky timbre of his voice slid over me like silk.

  “Then let go. I’m yours, Colton Caldwell.”

  He growled as our mouths collided—hungry, frantic, rough, soft, hard, sloppy—and I loved every minute of what he was doing to my heart, body, and soul.

  I didn’t know how long we were glued to each other, but I pouted when Nan drove up.

  “I should go. I have a meeting with the football coach to see if I can get back on the team. I’ll see you tomorrow?” He nodded at Nan, who was carrying a bag of Chinese food.

  “You can stay for dinner,” Nan said to Colton.

  I didn’t want him to leave, but considering how intense that kiss was, we needed a break. Otherwise, Nan might find us in a compromising position in my bedroom after dinner, and that wasn’t the way I wanted to start my new relationship with her.

  29

  The deck lights lined the perimeter around the railings, providing a soft glow to an otherwise eerie night. A drizzle fell as I stared out the sliding glass door in the kitchen. Sleep had escaped me, but I wasn’t surprised. My mind was more awake than ever. Dad had only been gone for seven hours, and the weight of his passing felt like a boulder on my chest. If Dad wasn’t in my thoughts, then Colton was. I believed Colton was the reason my soul was still intact.

  The creak of the stairs made me flinch. Nan probably couldn’t sleep, either.

  I hugged myself as I watched the branches sway in the distance.

  She sidled up to me, gently touched my arm, and let out a soft sigh. “A storm is coming.”

  As if she’d willed the gods, the wind lifted the leaves and errant pinecones off the deck and tossed them around.

  “I can’t stay here,” I mumbled. I felt like a storm was brewing inside me, turbulent, wild, and destructive. “It’s too painful.”

  I wished Colton was with me. When I’d been securely cocooned in his arms, the pain had dulled. But I didn’t expect him to be at my side in the middle of the night. He wasn’t home yet, anyway. He was probably hanging with Grady after the meeting with the football coach. I imagined they were playing pool or kicking back. If Colton had been next door, I would’ve been nestled in his arms.

  Nan tucked her hands into the pockets of her robe. “Maybe you should spend the weekend at Georgia’s. I’m sure she needs you as much as you need her. It will take your mind off things.”

  Georgia had texted when she’d gotten home from the hospital. I knew she was worried about me. “I don’t want to leave you.” Nan was mourning too.

  She snagged me into her side. “I’ll be okay.”

  I lay my head on her shoulder, watching the wind wreak havoc on the trees outside. />
  “Try to enjoy the weekend with your bestie. When Monday rolls around, we’ll talk about school.”

  It sounded odd to hear the word “school.” I hadn’t thought about classes or teachers or grades. Since Dad had been admitted, everything had become one big blur. “Don’t we have to talk about the funeral?”

  “We have plenty of time for that next week. Right now, we both need some time to mourn.”

  After Mom had passed, Dad and I had taken a road trip to clear our heads. We’d talked endlessly about Mom and celebrated her life. The time away had helped to ease our suffering, so I wasn’t about to argue. I knew Georgia would keep my mind occupied. She had a way of knowing how to make me laugh, even if I really wanted to hang out with Colton. He could definitely relate to what I was going through.

  A car door slammed, making me pull away from Nan. Colton was home. I’d peeked out the window a few times since I’d been up to see if he’d gotten home.

  As if Nan knew I was thinking about him, she said, “You love Colton. Don’t you?”

  “It’s that obvious, huh?” No sense in denying how I felt. After all, she’d witnessed us with our tongues down each other’s throats when she’d returned with dinner.

  The light from the hood over the stove cast a glow around the kitchen, highlighting her tired and red-rimmed eyes. “First love is always intense. Do me a favor? Please make sure you practice safe sex.”

  A flush of heat crawled up my neck. It wasn’t so much the topic that was making me burn from the inside out, but the thought of sex with Colton. Aside from the play-by-play Mia had given Georgia and me from time to time, I didn’t know much.

  A knowing smile played across her lips. “I was a teenager once. No need to be mortified.”

  “I guess it’s more of the fact I’m still a virgin.”

  She slumped as though relieved. “Maybe we should put you on the pill.”

  I imagined a similar convo if Mom had been there. No way could I have spoken to Dad about the birds and the bees. “You would be okay with that?”

  She smoothed a hand over my hair. “I’m here to guide and help you, not lay down strict rules to keep you from growing into a young woman. I know you have a good head on your shoulders. But do me a favor?”

  “Anything.” I wanted to make her proud of me, as if she were my mom.

  “Anytime you feel like you can’t make it through the day, I want you to talk to me or Colton or Georgia. Please don’t suppress your feelings.”

  I hugged her with all I had. She was the best gift God could’ve given Dad and me. “Thank you.”

  “Aw, sweetie. I love you.”

  I couldn’t keep the tears at bay anymore. “I love you too.”

  “We should try to get some sleep.”

  Rain began to fall, battering against the sliding glass door. Then thunder boomed.

  Nan and I turned our attention outside as a flash of lightning brightened the yard.

  “I love the rain.” Nan yawned. “I’m going to bed. Maybe the rain will help me sleep. The sound is soothing. I’ll see you in the morning.” She left just as Stella came into the kitchen, purring.

  I wasn’t ready to put my head on a pillow or lie in bed and watch my ceiling fan turn endlessly.

  I picked up my Maine Coon and stroked her ears. “Hey, girl. You can’t sleep, either?” I imagined she might have been wandering around, looking for Dad.

  She jumped down just as the front door opened.

  “What are you doing out there?” Nan asked. “It’s pouring. Come inside.”

  I ran into the family room and stopped short.

  Colton flicked his worried gaze in my direction.

  I shuddered, hoping nothing had happened.

  “Colton, it’s two in the morning. Is everything okay?” Nan asked in a concerned tone.

  I was beginning to think the worst. Maybe something had happened to Grady, or even to Colton’s dad.

  “Yes, ma’am,” he said, not breaking our connection. “I saw Skyler’s light on in her bedroom. I wanted to check on her.”

  A rush of air escaped me.

  Nan folded her arms over her chest, regarding me.

  I sent her a silent plea with my eyes, hoping she would get the message and not tell him to leave. If there was one thing that could help me relax, it was Colton holding me.

  “Well, don’t stay too long,” Nan said to Colton. “Skyler needs rest.”

  Not true. I needed Colton.

  Nan climbed the steps with Stella taking off ahead of her. Colton and I didn’t move until Nan's bedroom door clicked shut.

  Then Colton crossed the room in three long strides, hauled me to him, hoisted me in his arms, and pressed his lips to mine as though we’d been apart for years. My mind cleared, and I was transported to a sea of calm waters and warm sunshine.

  “I missed you,” I said, licking my lips as he nuzzled his nose against my neck.

  “I’ve been thinking about you all night. You okay?”

  My fingers danced through his damp hair. “I am now. It’s been hard to sleep.”

  He carried me over to our leather couch and sat down with me straddling him. “Want me to stay until you fall asleep?” His voice was rough yet smooth.

  Nan might not like that, but I couldn’t imagine her wigging out too much if we stayed on the couch.

  “I would like that. But first I need to do something.”

  He arched a brow. “So do I.”

  His tongue was in my mouth again, teasing and taking in frenzied strokes.

  Lust curled its way through my body until I was grinding into his growing erection.

  His hands were everywhere yet nowhere. His tongue was doing things to my mouth that I envisioned him doing in other regions of my body.

  I rocked into him, needing friction, needing to sate the hunger that had overpowered my senses.

  The sound of rain was our music. The beat of my heart kept time with it. I was ready to tear off my clothes when I heard a bang. Colton stiffened. I glanced up, opening my ears.

  “It was probably something outside,” Colton said. “The wind is brutal.”

  I crawled off him and snuggled at his side. He cocooned me in with his big, strong arm. It was best we didn’t take our lust any further. With my luck, Nan couldn’t sleep.

  I rubbed his chiseled abs as I stared at the fireplace. “Did you get back on the team?”

  “I did. Coach understood.”

  The sharp burst of lightning followed by the rumble of thunder made me nestle deeper into him.

  He chuckled. “Do you not like thunderstorms?”

  “I don’t mind them. I guess I’m just on edge. Please stay until I fall asleep.” If I even could.

  “I’m not going anywhere.” His tone sounded like a lullaby as I closed my eyes, trying not to think of Dad, but it was hard. I couldn’t shake the images of him in his hospital bed, not breathing. Suddenly, one tear, then another, fell, and before I could stop, I was sobbing.

  He dragged his fingers lightly over my arm. “Let it out, baby doll.” He kissed the top of my head. “I know the feeling like it was yesterday.” His voice cracked.

  I buried my face in his chest. “I miss him so much already.”

  He squeezed me tightly to him, pressing his cheek to my head. At that moment, I cried harder. Dad had always done that very thing.

  Several minutes passed as we sat in the dark, quiet room, the ping of the rain dripping off the roof of the porch.

  I sniffled as my tears began to lessen. “Colton, is your dad going to be okay?”

  “I hope so.” He sounded sad.

  “Are you?”

  He lightly tickled my arm in an up-and-down movement. “With you, Skyler, my darkness isn’t so dark anymore. You saved me.”

  I recalled him telling me that at the hospital, but I hadn’t had a chance to ask him. “How?”

  His chest heaved. “Do you remember saying, ‘At least you have a father’?”

/>   “That was rude of me.”

  I could feel his grin on my head. “No, it wasn’t. It was the truth. Anyway, when I saw the sheer pain you were going through at the hospital, I realized what I had to do for me to get past the years of grief that has eaten away at me for so long.” His heart pounded like the little drummer boy. “I had to tell my old man that I loved him despite how he treated me. I hadn’t uttered that to him since before Josh’s death. My guilt blinded me so much, I couldn’t see how my parents were suffering too. I will always feel responsible for what happened to my brother, but you made me see that sometimes we’re given a raw deal in life, and we need to find a way to look forward, not backward.”

  “I did all that?”

  “You’re strong, baby. You’re so emotionally strong that I’m in awe.”

  “I don’t think so. The only reason I haven’t broken down is you. Since you returned home, you’ve been the star of my dreams, and that has helped me to focus on something other than despair.”

  “Star of your dreams, huh?”

  “Number one.” I giggled.

  Silence dangled, the fridge compressor and the rain pelting the house the only sounds.

  “Grady told me you just found out you’re adopted.”

  Thanks to Mia. I couldn’t be mad at her, though. It wasn’t a secret. “I am.” I wasn’t sure I had the energy to go any further than that. I yawned. “Can we talk about something else?”

  “Try to sleep,” he whispered.

  I yawned and took in a deep breath. Then my body gave in to sleep.

  30

  The fire crackled while the hum of the surf broke along the shore. Unlike the stormy night before, stars twinkled, the moon shone like a beacon in the dead of night, and the sea was serene. Georgia, Grady, Mia, Colton, and I sat on the beach outside Grady’s mansion. The mood was somber and chill. My friends were mourning with me. The plan had been to hang at Georgia’s for the weekend, but Mia had called and told us to get our asses over to Grady’s.

  “Skye needs to take her mind off of things,” she had said.

  I agreed. Otherwise, my eyes would have been swollen shut from bawling, which I’d done since the minute I’d woken up that morning. The house felt empty, cold, and depressing. I understood why Dad moved us to a new house after Mom died—the memories were painful. I’d cried for an hour before I even got out of bed, then tried to go into his room but couldn’t.