41 likes, 68 comments, On the Wall...it's Complicated!

by vidit chopra

  Chapter 19: I hate her!

  After a couple of weeks in the hospital in Mumbai, Dad convinced the hospital authorities and my treating doctor to discharge me from the hospital. My nose and my ribs were recovering and was now able to sit up with not much of a respiratory issue which meant I was fit enough to go back home. Now even though the authorities did agree to Dad’s demand but they still wanted to keep me under observation for another week which meant a week more of listening to all the ills that were possible specially moulded in a way that it either ridiculed Tanya or someone in her family. It did trouble me at first but then I got used to it and it all was the same to me. It was best to pass a smile and stay shut and it always worked. The thing that did hurt me was the fact that Tanya didn’t visit me after the day that Simran had told me. The fact was, I was now having a doubt in my mind if they were even speaking the truth in the first place but then her visiting meant it opposed their point of view about her hence I believed that she did visit.

  One fine evening, when I was doing nothing, which was pretty much what I did every single day ever since I had been on the bed more than two and a half weeks ago, apart from the massive brain washing which also consumed around one third of the day, with no effect of course, my phone buzzed which was pretty much a rarity ever since the ass whopping part took place!

  “Hello.” I said.

  It was from Bangalore. Someone from the company had finally spotted my absence and hence had called up to confirm if I would be joining or not. I told them the whole story, and a story it was for sure. I cooked up an accident which was the reason I had been in the hospital and put it up in such a manner to gain as much sympathy and pity as I could for that eventually might have saved my job, which I hadn’t started off with as yet! I wasn’t too hopeful about it but surprisingly, they seemed to have accepted the cooked up story and hence held back my position for a couple of weeks. No one does that in today’s corporate world but well the company wasn’t too big and may be the only one which understood human emotions. Maybe I was lucky or maybe these guys were dumb enough or maybe didn’t have enough workers! I wasn’t extraordinary hence there shouldn’t have been any reason for them to hold my position. The fact was, I was unable to spot the sarcasm. No one in this world keeps a job for someone who misses his joining date at the company. They had called just to confirm that the job offer had been withdrawn and here I was jobless and maybe hopeless!

  It took more than half an hour to explain them the whole story, for them to show their concern about their employee and letting me know if I was getting a job from them or not which eventually ended as I had thought.

  What this job offer withdrawal did was gave me inspiration to pursue an internship program in my dream company! I was dejected for losing the job but excited for I could finally think of pursuing what I always wanted. I opened up the internet on my mobile phone and filled out a couple of forms that were posted on the company’s site. Once done, a call came in a matter of minutes from the company’s branch in India to set up a telephonic interview which was to take place right away. They were one mighty fast company. Doing an internship with them meant a lifetime of happiness and hence with full confidence I answered the questions they threw my way. After all this was done, they asked to me to wait till evening for the result. It was all a topic based internship i.e. you being selected or being kicked, all depended on the topic you chose and your field of interest. That’s what makes this company (and I am not going to name it) my dream company. No one can be as quick and as good as they were!

  After this conversation, I did realize that Tanya had successfully managed to fuck up my career and maybe my life as well. I felt stupid, dejected and irritated. It all appeared to be a big fat lie now. I had hardly spoken to Tanya in the past couple of months, nor had I seen her. I felt irritated with myself for thinking of being so madly in love but now, when the sense of realization had dawned, I felt like killing myself. Maybe whatever my family had been saying to me was right, maybe I was the one who was being fooled and at that instant in time I hated Tanya. The feeling was so powerful that it felt as if I had never loved her as much I hated her at that moment!

  Meanwhile, my folks were having a great time. Now that I was recovering well, they hardly visited me and most of their time went in seeing new and wonderful places in the city of Mumbai. Maybe they had realized that there was no point brain washing someone who already lacks it!

  The room that was otherwise occupied by six or seven people now had just two. One was me and the other being one of them. The duty was decided by them mutually, as per their convenience. When this instant of unmatched hatred for Tanya overpowered all other emotions, it was Simran who was sitting with me. We both had given each other cold shoulder ever since her outrage the day I came back to my senses.

  “Simran.” I said to her.

  “Yes.” She said softly not taking her eyes off the magazine that she was reading.

  “I hate her.” I said.

  As soon as I said this, she put the magazine away in an instant and stood right next to me.

  “What did you just say?” She asked with a perplexed look on her face.

  “I hate her.” I said again.

  “And by her you mean?” She asked.

  “Tanya, who else.” I said.

  “And why do you say that?” She said with a smile on her face.

  “I don’t know but I just hate her.” I replied.

  “But there would be some reason for it.” She said again.

  “Well, I just analyzed my life ever since college got over. It has been nothing but a piece of crap with most of the time being spent in a hospital bed for a girl who just didn’t care to come and meet me or doesn’t even call to check if the love of her life is alive or dead.” I said.

  “Oh okay. So finally you have understood what we all have been trying to explain to you since the past two weeks?” She asked again.

  “Maybe I have. I am not sure if I still love her or not, what I do know is that I hate her at the moment. Maybe I meant nothing to her. Maybe I was her pastime for college.” I said.

  “You are one confused soul.” Simran said with a smile on his face and shaking his head.

  “I wouldn’t deny that either.” I said.

  “You will be just fine. Don’t worry. Things will eventually span out the way they have to.” She said.

  “And I am really sorry for being a total jerk to you. I was being ridiculous and I am sorry for it.” I said.

  “No issues lover boy. At least this is one thing that Tanya has achieved.” She said.

  “What do you mean?” I asked.

  “Well, she has successfully managed to change you into a cool and calm sorry man from an angry young man.” She said and chuckled.

  “Well, that’s one transition almost every single guy undergoes after being in a relationship!” I said.

  “That’s so not true.” Simran said defending her women folk.

  “We will see. Remember this day and how Aditya is right now. We will talk an year later and see how Aditya is. You are bound to see a change, a change that nobody but you would like!” I said.

  “What do you mean by that?” She said.

  As I was about to answer my phone buzzed again.

  “Two phone calls in one day, I am on a roll” I said to myself.

  The number looked familiar and then I realized who it was.

  “Hello.” I said.

  “Hi Vishal.” Tanya said in a rather gloomy tone.

  “Hi Tanya.” I said.

  As soon as Simran heard the name come out of my mouth her eyes widened. She wanted to say something but didn’t. Now even though I was mad at Tanya for not having called or come to pay a visit and all I had for her was hatred, but as soon as I heard her voice my heart melted in an instant. The feeling of hatred was gone in a second and all my heart had was indefinite amount of love for the woman with the beautiful voice on the other end of the phone!

 
“How are you now?” She asked.

  “I am better. Healing at a great pace. How are you doing?” I said.

  It was awkward. It had been a while since we had spoken to each other and the awkwardness was such that we were talking formally to each other despite being in love for more than ten years. That’s what communication barrier does!

  “That’s nice to hear. I am fine too. I did pay a visit but at that point of time you weren’t conscious.” She said.

  “Oh ya. These guys did tell me about your arrival.” I said.

  This was followed by twenty seconds of silence. Neither of us spoke, in fact we both didn’t know what we had to talk about.

  “So…” I said.

  “So…” She repeated.

  “How are things at your job? Liking the place?” I asked.

  “It’s kind of okay. It’s something new definitely and hence it’s interesting as of now. Let’s see where this takes me.” She replied.

  Another ten seconds of silence followed.

  “And hey what did you do that Striker didn’t kill me? I owe you my life.” I said remembering.

  As soon as I said this, Simran gave me a weird look whose meaning I just wasn’t able to interpret.

  “What do you mean by didn’t kill you?” She freaked out.

  “Well, he was standing with a pistol in his hand ready to shoot me when most probably your Dad called him up after which he put his gun back.” I explained.

  “Holy fuck. I had no clue that Striker was about to take your life.” She exclaimed.

  “But I am still alive and maybe I need to thank you for that.” I said.

  “Vishal.” She said.

  “Yes?” I said.

  “When did we grow so apart Vishal that we now have to thank each other for things. I had to save you from Striker and that was my duty. As it is, you fell prey to him because of me. I hate my Dad Vishal. I guess I hate my whole family. I never thought they would react the way they did.” She said.

  “Don’t worry Tanya. Everything will be fine. When nothing is going your way, leave it to destiny, your fate, to decide. Everything will start falling in place as they have been planned.” I tried to explain to her.

  “But I don’t see a tomorrow without you Vishal. I don’t want a tomorrow without you!” She said.

  “Neither do I but as the things are going I am not sure what destiny has in store for us.” I said.

  She didn’t utter a word and kept silent.

  “So what did you tell your dad that he ordered Striker not to kill me?” I asked just for the sake of it.

  “I can’t explain that to you over the phone. I need to meet you. There are a lot of things that we need to talk about.” She said.

  “Come over to the hospital then.” I said.

  “That’s not the right place for this discussion plus your parents are here and as far as I could understand things, I guess no member of your family likes me anymore which is the reason that I haven’t visited you after that only time. Can you meet me somewhere outside? I won’t ask you to come a place far from the hospital. It will be not more than a ten minute journey. Can you do that much?” She said.

  “I don’t know. I can try. I will call you back in 15min to confirm.” I said.

  “Okay.” She said and hung up.

  I looked at Simran with pleading eyes.

  “What do you want?” She said, her tone showing signs of frustration.

  “I need to meet Tanya.” I said.

  “And what about all the hatred that was in your heart for her just a couple of minutes before the call.” She said.

  I didn’t say anything for a while.

  “Irrespective of the fact that I love her or I hate her, I need to meet her once. One last time Simran and for that I need your help.” I said.

  “Are you sure this will be the last time?” Simran asked.

  “I don’t know but if I don’t meet her today then there is a possibility that the last time has gone by a long time back. Please try and understand Simran.” I said.

  “What do you want me to do?” She said finally giving in.

  “Well, Tanya said that she can’t meet me in the hospital. She is calling me to a place which is a ten minute ride from the hospital.” I said.

  “What the fuck are you talking about? No one will let you move out of the hospital no matter how much we try and as it is who will drop you to the place?” She said.

  “The hospital won’t let me if they know that the patient is missing and as for the ride, your future husband might be able to help us.” I said.

  “I got the second part, even though I can’t promise that he would be free but what exactly are you going to do for the first part?” She asked.

  I then explained the whole plan. Luckily she agreed. She then called up Aditya to ask when and if he was free for a couple of hours during the day. Luckily enough, he was from 2 P.M. to 4 P.M. Simran called him to the hospital and asked him to reach at 2 P.M. sharp. Once this was done, I called up Tanya to ask her the exact address of the place and asked her to meet me at 2.30 P.M. and then we waited.

  It was 1.30 already which meant we had half an hour for the first phase of our plan to begin. Aditya arrived at 2 P.M. sharp and hence we began the first phase. The first phase was to dress up Aditya in the clothes given by the hospital while I changed into his. When this was done, Simran and I would take the car and go to the place that Tanya had decided. It was simple but Aditya was asking thousands of questions for we hadn’t really told him anything about the plan. He was horrified when we said, “Now you wait here. We will be back by 3.45 P.M. If any nurse or doctor comes, remember that you are Vishal, not Aditya. Now take rest.”

  Soon after, we slowly moved out of the hospital trying to avoid being seen by any of the doctors known to Dad i.e. the ones we had met before. After successfully exiting the hospital, we sat in Aditya’s car. I was as it is nervous and add to that the fact that Simran was driving. Nothing scares me as much as a woman driver does! I reluctantly sat in the car, after taking God’s name, in the hope that we will reach the destination in one piece, even though it was ironic enough, for I was literally in three at the moment.

  Thanks to modern technology and the presence of GPS Navigation we were able to reach the destination in precisely ten minutes. It was a small hotel. I asked Simran to wait in the car or go to the nearby restaurant and said that I would give her a call as soon as I was done. After instructing her, I entered the hotel and called up Tanya’s number.

  She picked it up at the first ring itself.

  “Where are you? I have already reached.” I said.

  “Just a minute.” A familiar voice said. It was a male and certainly not striker but the voice looked familiar.

  “Hello. Hi. I am about to reach. Right in front of the gate.” She said and hung up as I saw the same black Scorpio enter through the gates of the hotel.

  It stopped right in front of the entrance. Right afterwards, the front door of the car opened and Striker stepped out. I was awestruck when I saw him. I wasn’t ready for another beating, not at the moment anyway for this time chances of survival would have gone in negative. He glanced at me and then opened the back door of the car as Tanya and Kushal stepped out.

  “What is he doing here?” I asked Tanya pointing at Striker.

  “Just performing my duty, sir.” Striker said.

  It was as if he was a robot. Just a couple of weeks ago, he was standing in front of me with a gun in his hand ready to shoot me and now he was referring to me as sir! He simply followed the instructions that were thrown at him.

  I looked at Kushal and passed a smile for anything else would have hurt one or the other bone of my rather broken up body.

  “Shall we go in and talk?” Tanya said.

  “Sure.” I said and followed her.

  Kushal looked visibly ashamed. He just couldn’t imagine that his drunk act would eventually lead to all that had happened then on!

  Af
ter talking about the general stuff for about fifteen minutes, Tanya said, “I need to talk to him in private. Bhaiya can you leave us alone for a while?”

  “Sure.” Kushal simply replied and went outside the room where Striker was standing.

  “So…” I said.

  “So…” she replied with a sheepish smile on her face.

  She shut the door of the room and gave me a tight hug right after that. As soon as she did, my ribs and my stomach and a few other bones did hurt but the hug was something I had been longing for a very long time hence it felt nice.

  “I missed you so much Vishal.” Tanya said.

  “I missed you too.” I replied.

  We hugged for a couple of minutes and then sat down to talk for we had a lot to talk about and we roughly had an hour to do so. While we were talking, Striker came in a couple of times to check if everything was fine. We told each other of what we were going through and spoke about a number of things. With every passing minute, we both felt all the more depressed for there was nothing cheerful about the conversation. We both knew that our families were never going to agree to our relationship, not after everything that had happened for sure and hence there wasn’t really a solution. Running away wasn’t an option for given Tanya’s Dad’s power, he would have hunted us down and would have killed me for sure if not both of us.

  “I guess this is the end then.” I said and got up.

  “I guess so too.” She said out loud. There were tears rolling down her eyes and I felt like crying too but somehow controlled myself.

  “It was nice knowing you Tanya. Thank you for all the wonderful memories that you have given me in the past ten years. I will take them with me.” I said.

  She simply nodded and didn’t say a word.

  We came out of the room and saw Kushal and Striker standing right in front of the door.

  “Everything fine?” Kushal asked.

  “Ask your sister.” I replied and started walking out of the hotel. After a moment I remembered something and went back in the direction Tanya, Kushal and Striker were standing.

  “I am sorry Kushal but I guess I took your mobile by mistake. You must have forgotten it in the room.” I said and returned Kushal his mobile phone.

  “Oh thanks. I would have been screwed if I had lost that.” He said.

  I simply nodded.

  “Good bye Tanya.” I said.

  “Good bye Vishal.” She said still crying.

  I went out of the hotel and called up Simran to come and pick me up. She said she was on her way and hung up.

  It was funny and sad how everything we did, no matter how hard we tried, this world just couldn’t see us together and it’s at such situations that you have to give way to new things in life. After having been beaten up like an ass two times by hugely built men, after fighting with my family, denying everything they said and after a lot of other sacrifices it had finally ended.

  What no one knew was the fact that it wasn’t me who was the reason for it to end. It was not Tanya either. It was us. Striker hadn’t killed me that day because Tanya had promised her Dad that she wouldn’t meet me ever again and that she would convince me that we were not meant to be together. After a lot coaxing, her Dad agreed and that was the reason that I was alive.

  But for my folks over here, it was something that was best left unsaid.

  For them it was best to know that:

  I hated her after all.