The Dragon and the Pearl

by Jeannie Lin

  The next evening, her tile was once again turned over. And again on the next.

  After several nights in the Emperor’s bed, she stood before him and untied her sash. Keeping her eyes boldly on his, she peeled the silk from her shoulders and let it fall down her body. His pupils grew dark, but he said nothing. He did not move towards her.

  She saw the longing. She knew how to read a man’s face and the tension in his body. The Emperor was not so old or unpleasant to look at. He had been unexpectedly kind. At that moment, she earnestly wanted to please him.

  If she could give him a son, her sins would be absolved.

  He looked at her for a long time while she stood with the silk dress pooled at her feet.

  ‘Ling Suyin.’ He finally rose and took her gently by the shoulders. ‘You are very beautiful.’

  He kissed her forehead and she shivered, folding her arms over her breasts. Her nakedness before him embarrassed her. It was only admiration she saw in his eyes, the way one appreciates a painting or the sky at dusk. She knew then that the Emperor’s yang essence had somehow been damaged. The Son of Heaven, flawed and imperfect.

  From that moment, she held something of value. The Emperor had only fathered a daughter with the Empress. There was no heir to the throne. The knowledge could endanger his entire rule and he needed her to keep his secret. Her life depended on it.

  That night, while the Emperor slept with his back turned, her tears soaked the pillow beneath her cheek. The Emperor would protect her. Her position as his favourite was secure, but she was still young. She had hoped that, with time, she might have been able to fall in love.

  Chapter Ten

  Li Tao sat opposite the bed in his chair, keeping still so as not to wake her. Some time in the night, Suyin had rolled on to her side. Her fingers were curled beneath her cheek like a child, and her body rose and fell with each breath. It had taken hours before she had settled into slumber. At the first creep of the morning light, she was already stirring.

  Her eyelashes fluttered open and her gaze trained onto him. ‘You didn’t sleep.’

  ‘I need very little.’

  She remained bundled in bed. His bed. A sultry murmur sounded in her throat and he grew hard. She didn’t need coy remarks or artful glances to entice him. If she only knew how many times he’d kept himself from going to her throughout the night.

  ‘I have decided not to fulfil our bargain,’ he stated.

  A dangerous glint lit in her eyes, followed by the ripple of tension down her spine. She snapped fully alert, with the watchfulness of a sleek cat preparing to pounce.

  Her tone cut keenly. ‘Even thieves and murderers honour their agreements.’

  ‘I’m not a thief.’

  ‘You have no use for me.’ She held the sheet over her breasts as she glared at him. ‘I disagree.’

  ‘I already told you, I know nothing about Gao or your political entanglements.’

  He laughed. Pure laughter this time. Had she forgotten how she’d writhed against his tongue?

  She blushed, pink and perfect. She hadn’t forgotten. Everything was changed, but the untouched consort couldn’t know how much until now. Her robe fell from her shoulders, leaving them bare except for the midnight cascade of her hair against the pale skin. He let out a slow, steady breath. No, he was certainly not ready to let her go.

  ‘Where will you go? To that forsaken house by the river?’

  ‘Yes.’ She dragged the sheet higher in defiance.

  He stood and approached. ‘You would wait helplessly until Gao’s army marches through?’

  She was too shrewd not to have considered all the risks. She knew Gao wanted her dead, but refused to tell him why.

  ‘You begged for protection in your message to Emperor Shen. I have another proposal for you.’

  ‘Hardly a proposal when I’m still at your mercy,’ she remarked.

  ‘Stay until the next full moon and I swear you’ll have my full protection.’

  ‘Your protection is worthless, Governor. In a month your head will no longer be attached to your shoulders.’

  Was that sadness that flickered in her eyes? Her mouth turned downwards and, for a scant moment, a stab of regret bore into him.

  ‘In a month, I’ll deliver you into the Emperor’s protection.’ He lowered himself on to the bed and she didn’t shrink away. A small victory. ‘And I won’t need to constantly guard myself against your elegant scheming.’

  ‘And until then, I remain here for your pleasure?’ she asked.

  ‘The pleasure would be mutual.’

  She flushed as he inched closer. Her armour of seductive detachment was gone, but he wondered who it had protected. He grew heavy, hard. He would have his mouth roaming over that soft skin soon. Her hand shot forwards to brace against his chest. The imperiousness of the gesture only inflamed him more.

  With a smile, he lifted her hand to his lips. ‘You were right all along. One night was not enough.’ He planted a kiss against her palm. ‘For either of us.’

  Indecision hovered in her eyes, but she didn’t pull away. She wanted this passion between them as much as he did, though she remained cautious as ever. He knew what it was like to be constantly on guard. He stroked her wrist lightly and her breath caught.

  ‘My answer is no,’ she whispered, unable to give the words any force. ‘I won’t stay.’

  ‘Until the next full moon.’ He lowered his mouth to press it softly against hers. ‘Let me convince you.’

  They hadn’t kissed since he’d brought her back inside. He kissed her now. Suyin’s grip loosened on the sheet between them as she responded, her lips warm and searching. The small surrender took away the last of his restraint and he pulled the sheet aside. She didn’t require more urging than that to fit herself to him, soft curves to hard muscle. Her arms wrapped around him to grip his shoulders. His arousal lifted fiercely against her and her thighs parted instinctively at the pressure. But her mind refused to surrender.

  ‘Why?’ she demanded.

  ‘I need to know what this is between us.’

  He caressed her neck and stroked a reverent hand between her breasts down to the valley of her stomach.

  ‘Desire.’ She spoke the word dismissively, but her breath hitched. ‘Yin and yang.’

  ‘You know there’s more.’

  ‘I see.’ Her cat’s eyes glittered wickedly. ‘You’ve discovered me untouched, so now you revel in being the only man to possess me.’

  She shouldn’t say things like that to him. Blood raged through his body, surging between his legs. ‘No one can ever possess you.’

  He had never allowed himself to desire anything with so much abandon. Certainly not any dream as sweet as this. His fingers dipped into the cleft of her legs. Her mouth parted in a silent moan as he drew small circles over her dampening flesh. Suyin could confound him, drive him to madness with her denials and half-truths, but the passion that glazed her eyes was real. Her hips lifted restlessly against his hand. He wanted her to let go. With him.

  His arousal grew painfully, eager to sink into her heat. But there was more. At the moment, he didn’t know what this feeling was that had taken hold of him. He only knew that he needed her to stay for as long as he could keep her. A month would have to be enough. A month set limits.

  Watching her carefully, he pressed his fingers intimately to her.

  ‘Tao.’

  With a shudder, her head fell back, neck exposed. He nipped at the pale skin of her throat and enjoyed the endless arch of her body into him. The blanket fell in a tangle about her legs and her toes curled tight into it. So beautiful.

  Their first coupling had been rushed. He had been mad with waiting, lost the moment he buried himself inside her. This morning, he would hold back and take her to the heights of heaven. Then she could no longer question what held them together.

  He stroked the smooth pearl of her sex, opening her. Her legs unlocked with abandon. Slowly, carefully he slid the length of his
finger into her. She was tight, so tight around him.

  ‘Stay,’ he urged in a heated whisper. The same entreaty he’d given the night before. The only plea he’d ever uttered.

  She shook her head, unthinking, lost in pure, mindless pleasure. She reached for him and cupped her hand over his swollen sex.

  His patience was gone. He needed her now.

  Through misted eyes, she watched him shed his clothes and slant his body over her to position himself. He could feel the tension building in her limbs as she anticipated his entry, bracing against the pain.

  He kissed her throat as he angled his hips downwards and then forwards. Her flesh parted slowly and surrounded him, smooth heat tightening all around. She made a small sound in her throat and he slowed to stroke his hand through her hair.

  She pressed her lips against the curve of his neck then. ‘Don’t stop.’

  He gathered her to him and sank deeper. Her knees lifted to accept him. He paused, adjusted his hips and filled her completely.

  There was still pain, but a welcome sort. It sensitised her, made the pleasure sharper. Her legs wrapped around his thighs and she dug her fingers into the bundle of muscle in his lower back. She closed her eyes to concentrate on the feel of him filling her. The pillow books spoke of coupling in vague, poetic phrases. It was none of that. This was wet flesh and heated skin, sweat and salt, vulgar and beautiful.

  The muscles of his neck strained upwards. ‘Suyin,’ he groaned.

  She loved that she could render such a powerful man helpless with her body. Loved that he did the same to her as hard as she fought against the surrender. He was no longer careful as his climax approached. He pushed harder, deeper into her, his thrusts taking on a restrained violence as if he needed to give her as much of him as she could take.

  He took on an almost desperate rhythm, digging his fingers into her hips. She was rising again, chasing after him. At the height of it, the man above her disappeared. All that was left were the sensations he pulled from deep within her, the heady, spiced scent of him and the laboured pant of his breath in her ear.

  Her inner muscles convulsed around him, squeezing him until he let out an anguished cry. He was releasing into her. She joined him and they crashed together in completion. This would never end. Still she held him tight. Still he thrust into her. They drifted into sleep that way, with his body embedded inside her and their arms entwined. Li Tao’s skin glistened in the lantern light and she couldn’t resist running her hand down his back to assure herself that his magnificent body belonged to her in that moment.

  The clouds and the rain and the heavens opening. All that and so much more.

  Suyin slept in satiated exhaustion, turning often in the strange bed. The awareness that Li Tao was close permeated her slumbered thoughts. Once, he reached out to pull her close. She dozed off tucked against his shoulder, but they didn’t fit together as well as one would hope. They shifted apart in a haze of movement. When she finally opened her eyes, he was gone.

  A hint of sandalwood and soap lingered on the pillow, combined with the unique scent of Li Tao’s skin. She stretched her fingers over the rumpled space among the blankets where he had been. His absence was nearly palpable.

  Her lover. She had thought she would grow old and silver-haired without experiencing what that meant. But the morning’s passion and her unbridled response to him only left her with more questions. She couldn’t be fooled by kindness. And the rapture between a man and a woman was natural. There was nothing special about these feelings. Nothing.

  The scrape and shuffle of movement in the house meant it was past the quiet stir of the morning. Everyone would be up and completing their chores. Li Tao would be long gone to some unnamed duty that needed his attention.

  She couldn’t stay here, hiding away until he returned. Sitting up, she scanned the bed chamber, the contents pristine and unadorned. They belied his enigmatic nature. He should have at least woken her. It took some time to search out her clothes among the tangled sheets and even longer to arrange all the different layers into some semblance of presentability. Her hair was beyond repair. She smoothed down the length with her palms and tied it back. Let the servants whisper. They were all certain that their master had brought her there as his mistress anyway.

  She pushed the door open and stepped into the corridor. Though it was unlikely he was still there, she paused at the entrance to Li Tao’s study to listen for some sign of movement. The thought of seeing him again kept her on a keen edge of anticipation. What had she promised with her body? What had he? Her awareness reached out with tiny threads to search for him, only to be left to languish.

  Beyond the front parlour, Auntie stood with her head bowed at the altar. The raised table held an urn of smouldering incense and took up a tidy compartment near the kitchen. Offerings of tea, rice and fruit had been arranged before a single thin plaque. For the first time, Suyin noticed the name carved into the wood. Lei Hunhua—Spring Flower. A woman’s name with no accompanying plaque bearing other names, a father, grandfather or great-grandfather to head the ancestral line.

  Auntie bowed reverently before turning around. The deep lines around her mouth creased into a smile.

  ‘Lady Ling, Master has spared Ru Shan and sent him away.’ Auntie came forwards to take her arm, crowding close in confidence. ‘Auntie sent special thanks to Master Li’s ancestors for this mercy.’

  Suyin breathed easier. ‘Thank the heavens.’

  She had known Li Tao wouldn’t kill Ru Shan. Her instincts told her he was more than a senseless butcher, yet she was more confused than ever. Last night by the gorge, Li Tao had dragged her into his embrace with an almost fearful protectiveness. Then he’d waited until morning to seduce her with irresistible skill. The memories were both sensual and devastating.

  Why did he want more time now? He didn’t strike her as a man who was prey to his own indulgences. He didn’t strike her as a man who was prey to anything.

  ‘Do you know where Governor Li has gone?’ she asked.

  Auntie shook her head. No one ever seemed to ask where he went.

  ‘You haven’t eaten,’ Auntie scolded gently. ‘Let us go to your room. Auntie will bring you something.’

  Suyin smoothed her hands over her robe and tucked her hair back nervously. The old woman said nothing about the scandalous way she had emerged from Li Tao’s wing of the house so late in the day. She wondered if Li Tao had ever kept any mistresses. And there it was. The sting of jealousy.

  She and Auntie made their way back to her apartments, while the other servants darted like fish at the edges of her vision, moving silently to their duties, but the atmosphere had changed around them. Soldiers were now stationed inside the mansion in addition to the patrols outside.

  Suyin glanced back at the armed guards by the entrance to the garden. ‘Auntie, what happened yesterday…I’m sorry for the pain I caused everyone.’

  Auntie hushed her. ‘Master Li, he worries too much.’ Her voice dropped so low, Suyin had to strain to catch the words. ‘Always watching his back. All this time.’

  Suyin slowed her pace as they started up the stairs. ‘You called him something yesterday.’

  Tao-Tao. It had been so unexpected. A sentimental nickname someone would call a child.

  Auntie chuckled and patted her hand. ‘Would the lady believe he was such a skinny boy? His ribs used to stick out from him like the spokes of a wheel.’

  ‘So Auntie knew the Governor from back in Luoyang.’

  ‘Luoyang, yes. Dirty city. Smelly. He would run through the streets with his sleeves frayed and holes at his knees and Auntie would mend them up. Now see what he has become?’

  There was pride there and, surprisingly, unbridled affection. She could hardly picture Li Tao as a lanky urchin wandering through the gutters. So he had risen from low birth. It wasn’t unheard of in these times when the empire valued talent almost as much as it valued noble blood.

  ‘Then you really are family?’r />
  ‘No, no. Tao lived with his mother in the house next to Auntie. Such sadness.’

  The more she learned about Li Tao, the more the mystery deepened. It was all in fragments, the streets of Luoyang, the daggers on display in his study. The hint of tragedy chased her away from prying any further. She had no business seeking out such personal details of Li Tao’s life.

  In the seclusion of her apartments, Auntie combed out her hair and helped her dress while deliberately avoiding any more talk of the previous day’s confrontation. The silence tormented Suyin, leaving her vulnerable to thoughts of Li Tao and his unseemly proposal. For the first time in a long while, she wished for guidance from someone knowledgeable like Madame Ling. She had nothing to follow but her own instincts, which were suddenly murky and fragmented, and she certainly couldn’t confide in Auntie.

  Courtesans didn’t enter into arrangements purely for pleasure. They vied for security, comfort and wealth. Li Tao had asked for a month. The scant number of days between one full moon and the next. Hardly the request of a man enchanted.

  Li Tao was going to war. He wanted a brief, tidy affair and she—she didn’t know what she wanted any more.

  Auntie had a tray of food brought to her and Suyin saw with a wisp of tenderness that Cook had put a plate of steamed dumplings on it, another of her favourites. She finished the meal so as not to hurt Cook’s feelings, and then carried her qin out to the garden for some distraction. Time was passing with painful slowness that day and it would be easier to detect anyone returning to the mansion when she was outside.

  She seated herself in the pavilion and lifted the instrument from its case, pausing to run her fingers along the lacquered base. This was the first gift Li Tao had given her. It was one of the few belongings she’d have, when she left.

  ‘Are you well, Lady Ling?’

  She glanced up to see Jun standing before her with a canvas sack cradled in one arm.